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  1. #16
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    Thanks so much it means a lot .

    I am doing okay but it is starting to sink in and I am starting to cry more but I have no choice but to accept he is gone and now finally at peace and in a better place then here on Earth in pain. I will miss him even if he did drive me crazy most of my life but for the majority he did try and be as good as he could be he may have been selfish and childish and cruel at times but he also did have many good qualities and I do love him.

    I am glad the service is over I did really good leaving the house and going to the cemetery except on the way there my anxiety kicked in little bit and I had to get my Hubby to pull over and let me poop lol at a gas station so he gets me out in my wheelchair and he is agitated already because he just is lol anyway he lets go of my wheelchair and I go rolling down the incline and turn sideways and I gasp lol grabbed the wheels and pulled myself back up straight then we get inside and he ran me into the rack that holds bottles of booze hahahaa and my feet hit 3 bottles and I thankfully catch them with my feet set them back up right and make it to the bathroom in time shewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww... lol
    The service was very nice and very hot my cousin did the eulogy and my friends sang two songs they did amazing .. I sat there and right next to me were my Moms and my Brothers Headstones I then thought wow this spot is feeling up and I will be next...

    Standing near me was my younger brother who is just one nasty person he stood there with his arms crossed and his shades on and his two bandanas and people tried talking to him and all he would do is grunt he is mad at everyone he decided a long time ago that Dad was not his dad anymore and called him horrible vulgar names and said he hoped dad died well he got his wish and I didn't bother trying to get in touch with him he told me several months back to F OFF and yelled at me and then deleted me from facebook because I told him to stop yelling at me I am not well so that made him mad at me... Dad did all he could for my brother and as we all know you can give and give to someone on drugs and they keep taking so dad stopped giving and my brother was done with dad.. he blames everyone for his issues . I was scared he would say something with everyone there and I knew I would say something back but he didn't thankfully.

    Now to learn to live life with out my Dad.....

  2. #17
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    Thank you very much it means a lot ..

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