Detonation

[CeltAngel]

Feeling extremely angry and betrayed. Doing all I can to hold on and not backslide the way my instincts are telling me to. Isolation seems powerfully enticing right now, but I don't want to go back to it because I could feel myself withering into nothingness when I was there. It's taking the last elements of trust I have in me to express this frustration into the void.... It all just feels so fucking futile.

Oh God, I just want to go further down that that line of thought, but I can't, I can't, I can't.... but it doesn't feel like there's any fucking alternative left on this planet. I'm so tired, I'm so sore.... I just want peace. I want a final fucking break from this never-ending cavalcade of bullshit perpetrated by the most rancid [BEEP] to walk the Earth masquerading as human.

I should stop now. I'm sorry.

[Flavor]

[CeltAngel]

Thanks, Jeannie.

[Total Eclipse]

I understand this a lot. Like too much For me to feel safe someplace, I have to totally trust it. Which is HARD. The person dating me must have the patients of a saint. I am so avoidant at times that I need to be pulled out and reminded there are safe places, and people DO CARE, sometimes we find shitty situations on the way. If you want to talk about it in more detail we are all here to listen

[Lunaire]

I’m sorry that you’re going through this struggle.

Let us know if you want to open up at all on it or vent a bit. We can act as your complaints department.

[CeltAngel]

Thank you for being understanding... I also vented a little on my blog, but I'm not being very direct and right now I don't want to. I'll just accept your kind words and cry for a little bit.

Edit:

In recent times, I've suffered a series of betrayals which have left me with very, very little trust in anyone. The most notable of those was the breaking of a friendship with someone who had been close with me for most of my adult life.

I'm also feeling a touch over-emotional because I'm overtired and I'm still in the postdrome phase of the migraine I had yesterday, which just adds to my fragility.

Like with anyone, there are a lot of other factors that come into it, but I guess those are the most pressing matters right now.

[Flavor]

When I get a moment of time I will read your blog Celt.

[Ironman]

Thank you for being understanding... I also vented a little on my blog, but I'm not being very direct and right now I don't want to. I'll just accept your kind words and cry for a little bit.

Edit:

In recent times, I've suffered a series of betrayals which have left me with very, very little trust in anyone. The most notable of those was the breaking of a friendship with someone who had been close with me for most of my adult life.

I'm also feeling a touch over-emotional because I'm overtired and I'm still in the postdrome phase of the migraine I had yesterday, which just adds to my fragility.

Like with anyone, there are a lot of other factors that come into it, but I guess those are the most pressing matters right now.

It sounds like you need a mind and nerve reset, I'd take some time to release. We'll be here

[CeCe]

It sounds like you need a mind and nerve reset, I'd take some time to release. We'll be here

Agreed!

[CeltAngel]

How would I best go about that? I'm truly open to any advice.

[Total Eclipse]

I'm overtired and I'm still in the postdrome phase of the migraine I had yesterday, which just adds to my fragility.

Migraines really suck badly. I get them a lot and often need to do self care. Sometimes the phase after the migraine is the worst. Have you tried a nice bubble bath, some mint tea, some breathing exercises? Take sometime to treat yourself to something good.

[CeltAngel]

I ended up taking a lengthy nap and feel quite a bit better. My partner's on the way home now for the long weekend together, so that should be extremely helpful.

[Shredder]

I'm glad to hear you are feeling better. I hope you manage to have a restful weekend

[Total Eclipse]

I ended up taking a lengthy nap and feel quite a bit better. My partner's on the way home now for the long weekend together, so that should be extremely helpful.

Glad you have your partner there to be supportive and that your feeling better!

[CeltAngel]

Glad you have your partner there to be supportive and that your feeling better!

I'm feeling SO much better. That anger feels like a storm in a teacup now.