Do you push people away?

[Koalafan]

I naturally push people away. Im far more comfortable being in my own little world then risking being in someone else's. Not a whole lot of people actually push through that "wall" and try to get to know me...not a whole lot of people get past that wall I can be VERY cold and distant in real life

[Misssy]

I don't need to push people away to be honest. They stay away on their own.

[enfield]

well of course i push strangers away because those are strangers. friends i also push away. i don't mean to do it when i do that. some i might want space from and others might want space from me but the end result is i push them away. this is all for online friends because i don't have any of the other type.

[Scarlet]

Im the same. If people get too close i tend to shut them out and push them away. I dont like getting close to people because I feel as though you will be betrayed a bit too easily...Even though I dont want to it happens. Solitude, while being around others feel good. Well I dont know if that made sence(sp?)..Just thought I'd share it.

[Chieve]

I feel like I do all the time, well for the most part.

99% of the people I tried hard to know, ended up just not really wanting to be my friend...

[Heelsbythebridge]

Usually when I'm feeling bad, yeah. It's hard to find energy to reach out when I'm in a bad place mentally... I turn down every invite to do anything. I've been in the darkest place I've ever been the past few months (I think I'm getting better) and I relied on others to not give up on me. Only our dear kesker here, and my IRL best friend Ali, continued to reach out to me when I've gone completely despondent.

I've ruined relationships a lot when in that headspace.. which is okay I guess, I mean it helps me see more clearly who my friends are, who thinks I am worth the effort to keep in their lives.

A lot more common is when I "push" people away more passively by just not responding to emails or letting the relationship fizz out.

[Misssy]

I just want to push people over.

Most people just want to waste my time they really don't want to be a real friend.

[Chieve]

I just want to push people over.

Most people just want to waste my time they really don't want to be a real friend.

I sometimes feel the same way.

It kind of got to the point for me, if we don't hit off well in the beginning (or they don't really seen to care to get to know me) I'll just say [BEEP] it and not even bother with them because we won't be friends, or at least chances are so I won't waste my time...there is no middle ground for me either, it's black and white, were great friends, or we just stay as strangers with a little knowledge of one another...

[Chieve]

Usually when I'm feeling bad, yeah. It's hard to find energy to reach out when I'm in a bad place mentally... I turn down every invite to do anything. I've been in the darkest place I've ever been the past few months (I think I'm getting better) and I relied on others to not give up on me. Only our dear kesker here, and my IRL best friend Ali, continued to reach out to me when I've gone completely despondent.

I've ruined relationships a lot when in that headspace.. which is okay I guess, I mean it helps me see more clearly who my friends are, who thinks I am worth the effort to keep in their lives.

A lot more common is when I "push" people away more passively by just not responding to emails or letting the relationship fizz out.

Yeah this is real common, I can relate pretty well.

I would have to reach out to people online and at the same time reject everyone else in order to get alone time...

I mean, I guess in a sense I have plenty of alone time, but I mean, time alone without having to stress over someone I want to be friends with.

I turn off my phone, I don't go on Facebook, don't read emails(I mean in all honesty no one will send me an email, fb me, or text me, except this one guy who is the only person I can't reject) and even though no one won't message me it will let me feel more relaxed I won't have to feel like I will talk to someone and it makes me feel distant and it makes me sadder not having someone want to talk to me when I'm always available...

So in that sense I just need to gain distance since the online world keeps me so close with everyone.

Sorry I got a little off topic lol but yeah I wouldn't say I ruined relationships but you really do figure out who really cares for you and who doesn't....

Unfortunately I ignored that and I continued to message people who didn't care about me, and when I was in high school I would take it out on those who did genuinely care for me...

I mean this one guy was hard to read because whenever I hung out with him he was awkward with me when he's not like that in real life, or this girl who would message me, I started to reject them when this guy I really tried to know rejected me, but as I type this I'm realizing who did care for me...

I wish you luck with everything, I hope you get better

[Heelsbythebridge]

Thankyou Chieve, you as well I think it's the ones who push for a response, at the risk of upsetting/annoying you, who are the ones who genuinely care. Most people take the "don't ask, don't tell" route, which is heartbreaking. Admittedly, I pushed away some of my friends, but I didn't expect them to stay there on their own volition, you know? It's a selfish thing to ask of someone- it's exhausting to worry about someone else when you already have things going on in your life- which is what makes what the few friends did for me so much more heartfelt.

[Chieve]

Thankyou Chieve, you as well I think it's the ones who push for a response, at the risk of upsetting/annoying you, who are the ones who genuinely care. Most people take the "don't ask, don't tell" route, which is heartbreaking. Admittedly, I pushed away some of my friends, but I didn't expect them to stay there on their own volition, you know? It's a selfish thing to ask of someone- it's exhausting to worry about someone else when you already have things going on in your life- which is what makes what the few friends did for me so much more heartfelt.

True! I would push for a response but I feel sometimes people are ignoring me or acting like they didn't hear it or I feel weird after a second time...so I guess I should feel it out

You know I guess when I give a short response to people and no one questions it I guess that's it and sometimes when I do it to others I try by to so I don't come off creepy or weird...

It's hard, I definitely agree with you, I guess it depends on the person and you gotta feel it out?

I do wish people cared though, most don't though since they have a social life and don't really care for any more friends...

[Member11]

I don't think I do unintentionally, although, I have pushed people away before to "test" to see if they actually want to talk to me and not just being nice, if that makes sense.

[Sagan]

I do. especially when I drink. All of my hatred, anger, and rage comes up and gets misdirected

[Keddy]

I never mean to push people away. I honestly don't have a rude bone in my body. I just know I have issues with my social skills and I can come across as awkward and weird, but I mean well.

[FreshDaily]

yes