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  1. #1
    toaster little's Avatar
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    How do you guys deal with feeling ignored and neglected?

    People say that they're there for you if you need to talk to someone, but when you actually need a person to listen to you, no one has the time or the attention span to actually care enough to see what you have to say.

    After seeing how no one seems to care enough and would rather do something else, I feel like people are ignoring me and that no one actually cares. So I start questioning things like the purpose of making friends (if those people actually don't care) or the reasons for finding someone to date (if the things you want to discuss will only make you look less attractive and scare someone away).

    Do I just need to continue to put on a fake smile and pretend everything's ok so that people will like me and still want to talk to me? Most people who know me think that I'm generally happy with my life and that nothing bothers me.

  2. #2
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    Unfortunately others aren't on the same timeline as we are. In other words, they may be having their own problems when we need them to be there for us. Also, a lot of times people don't know what to say. Or it may be that what they say isn't what you or I imagine they "should" say.

    The trouble with depending on other people to make you feel better is that they will let you down. It's really rare for someone to be there for you every time you need or want them. And truly if they are, then you probably have an unhealthy rescuer co-dependent relationship that will backfire on you.

    No, you don't need to put a fake smile and pretend everything's ok. If you hurt, cry. Or get angry. Write it all down. Do something good for yourself. The only true person who knows exactly what you need when you are hurting is you. So therefore you are the only person to make yourself feel better.

    Funny how when I stopped waiting for others to fix me, I had more time to fix my own self.

    Please know that I only tell you this because I spent a very long time in my life waiting for the Calvary to come. They don't. Not because of me. It's because of humanity. We don't have ESP. We don't react the same to situations. And we all are struggling ourselves just to survive. I know personally, I don't have the energy to fix ten other people.

    Yes, feeling ignored and neglected sucks. So why put that important task in other's hands? Make yourself important.
    The Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about

  3. #3
    TheDarkness's Avatar Sarcasm Inc
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    It's really rough, especially when it comes from someone you thought you were close to or on good terms with. It sucks, but sometimes I feel at least now I know where I stand with that person. I try to keep an open mind at first, thinking maybe they had some kind of pressing matter to attend to. Maybe they are legitimately busy. If it happens a couple times, I tend to withdraw.

  5. #5
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    I'm still trying to deal with this kind of thing in a more healthier manner It's so frustrating. I've noticed that people don't talk to me at all unless they have insignificant problems to talk about.. I can't even hold casual conversations with them anymore. And when I am in need of someone to talk to about what's going on on my mind, nobody's there.

    And people wonder why I don't share a whole lot about myself or why I don't open up more.

  6. #6
    nemmm3's Avatar
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    Quote toaster little View Post
    People say that they're there for you if you need to talk to someone, but when you actually need a person to listen to you, no one has the time or the attention span to actually care enough to see what you have to say.

    After seeing how no one seems to care enough and would rather do something else, I feel like people are ignoring me and that no one actually cares. So I start questioning things like the purpose of making friends (if those people actually don't care) or the reasons for finding someone to date (if the things you want to discuss will only make you look less attractive and scare someone away).

    Do I just need to continue to put on a fake smile and pretend everything's ok so that people will like me and still want to talk to me? Most people who know me think that I'm generally happy with my life and that nothing bothers me.
    I feel like this all the time. I only have a few close friends but even then I cant vent to them because they either, don't care or don't understand.
    It's hard to find someone who you can actually talk to about everything.

    If you ever need a chat, your welcome to message me anytime

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