Can't believe I didn't see this message. Been awhile. I think that asking people in my classes to meet, study and get something to eat is not gonna happen, because they'll say no.Ironman
Can't believe I didn't see this message. Been awhile. I think that asking people in my classes to meet, study and get something to eat is not gonna happen, because they'll say no.
I know this isn't the answer you want to hear, but you really have to try to be more initiative if you want an active social life. People aren't going to approach you in class, because they're there to learn, not socialize. I know you've already dismissed school clubs, but I really think you should give them a try. Everybody there already has a common interest, so you already have a way to integrate yourself. Joining my school's martial arts club was one of the best decisions I made for myself. I felt really awkward and out of place at first. But everyone was super nice to me and accepted me. By my senior year, I was leading warm-ups, stretching, and conditioning. Even though a semester has already gone by, it's not too late. I actually didn't join until my second semester. (I didn't have any social life my first semester because my floor was very extroverted and into partying. I let them take me out to a house party once and I was paralyzed by fear the whole night.)
Come on. Maybe we can help you out. What kind of things are you interested in?
I don't know what I'm interested in. I mean people in real life probably won't have the same interests as me.
You'd be surprised. I'm from a really big school, but we had everything from academic clubs, to cultural clubs, to, performance clubs. Last year, two of my roommates were in the seeing eye puppy raising club. My third roommate was in a medieval reenactment club. If your school has a list of clubs online, take a quick look through it. Maybe something will spark your curiosity enough to check it out.
Where to begin....first of all, you can't guarantee people won't like you...so why say such things? And people are busy with their own lives and school stuff, you can't wait for people to reach out to you. Like others have said, you have to take the intiative. If your college is like mine, there are many clubs and organizations you can join. You have to put forth an effort to make the things you want happen. And with the negative self-talk you are doing, that is going to be a big hinderance. You have to change the way you think. Quit talking down to yourself and quit speaking in absolutes. You don't know anything for sure until you try. You really haven't so quit assuming it is impossible.
These kids on my campus don't care about nobody but themselves. The employees and counselors don't care about no students, they only care about their next paychecks. I'm afraid to go up to people, so why am I the one being pushed around all the time, to just put myself out there? I'm always quiet all the time when I walk down the halls or when I'm in a whole hour of classes. It is impossible to make friends at this time of year.
Okay then. Hoping that you will one day understand that your situation is how you choose to view it. You are making assumptions, generalizations, and speaking in absolutes with no real basis. It is really pointless if you are wanting things to change. But if you are only wanting to vent, fine. You are not open to things being any different than how you choose to perceive them. You are making a choice. It's not everyone else with the problem, it is yourself. I've been there and done that.
NoSocial is right.
And you can't assume people will like you, either. But you have to try. Giving up and not trying is meaningless, it's a bad idea.
Like I said, these kids at my college don't care about nobody but themselves, and I rather transfer to a university.
Do you care about others? Just asking.
Yes I do.
You care about others, yet you say they care about no one else without even knowing them? Doesn't sound like you give people a chance either. Maybe you are not much different than them.
Fap Wizard
I'm at a 4 year university currently, and I also have absolutely no friends. I live on campus in a suite with 9 other girls and they're all friends, but I never say I word to them lol.
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