# Anxiety Disorders > Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) >  >  Knowing people that didn't report or stop horrific events from happening?

## Total Eclipse

Does this trigger your PTSD? 

I know people that have personally whiteness a friend slap their wife in the face, spit on them, call them stupid, etc.. did nothing because "it wasn't their place". The [BEEP]? They just awkwardly sat their as it happened and than carried on the convo several minutes later 'like nothing happened' and chilled the rest of the night. Hasn't brought it up to his guy friend or asked the girl if she was ok. He asked me on FB, 'what makes guys do that' and my question to him was: what made him not HELP her? 

I know many people that admit they've seen mothers punch kids in the face and don't call the cops "because they don't want to get involved" (seriously??) and some that admit at parties, they've seen people get raped and "didn't want to get involve". I've also seen people turn their eye the other way when people kick their dogs in public.  ::(:  

There was a case where my aunt's friend told her that her husband raped her and aunt said "your married, you gave that consent up years ago" and told her that if she no longer gave consent she needed to move out of that persons house and file divorce before having sex without her permission would be considered "not rape". 

How do you see horrific events and just let them happen, not say anything, not call the cops, not report it-- or reach out to the person? What kind of person does this  ::(:  

How does this make you feel about people that do this?

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## HoldTheSea

I have really strong opinions about this and I don't want to go into a lot of detail, because I don't want to start an argument with anyone, but it really pisses me off when people turn a blind eye to abuse or assault that they're clearly aware is going on. It absolutely triggers my PTSD, especially because it's happened to me personally.
The thing that happened to me that caused my PTSD, everyone around me turned a blind eye to so the person got away with it when they should have gone to prison.
I was also bullied the whole time I was growing up, and the teachers were always aware it was going on but didn't do jack [BEEP] about it. My parents would call the school about it and the faculty would tell them there was nothing going on and that I was exaggerating. It got to the point of me doing something really drastic because I felt like no one was listening and no one cared.
My partner was also physically and sexually abused by his mother as a child and his dad and brother never reported it so she got away with it for essentially the rest of his life.
In my personal opinion, people who don't report/get involved in abuse and assault cases are just as bad as the perpetrators and deserve similar punishment.

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## Total Eclipse

> I have really strong opinions about this and I don't want to go into a lot of detail, because I don't want to start an argument with anyone, but it really pisses me off when people turn a blind eye to abuse or assault that they're clearly aware is going on. It absolutely triggers my PTSD, especially because it's happened to me personally.
> The thing that happened to me that caused my PTSD, everyone around me turned a blind eye to so the person got away with it when they should have gone to prison.
> I was also bullied the whole time I was growing up, and the teachers were always aware it was going on but didn't do jack [BEEP] about it. My parents would call the school about it and the faculty would tell them there was nothing going on and that I was exaggerating. It got to the point of me doing something really drastic because I felt like no one was listening and no one cared.
> My partner was also physically and sexually abused by his mother as a child and his dad and brother never reported it so she got away with it for essentially the rest of his life.
> In my personal opinion, people who don't report/get involved in abuse and assault cases are just as bad as the perpetrators and deserve similar punishment.





I"m sorry you went through that  ::(:  And your partner...  ::(:  --- childhood abuse isn't an 'excuse' for adult actions. But I deffo can see why some adults are very messed up....   ::(:  I hope you can/ have found peace/ healing  :Hug: 

I agree. I made an emotional thread about that a few days ago re: similar punishment --- esp to do with things like seeing someone be assaulted and raped. I honestly think they should be charged with the same thing or very similar, depending on how serious the situation is.

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## lethargic nomad

If you get involved with someone kicking their dog or hitting their kid, then they may start attacking you.  Not an easy situation to deal with.

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## Total Eclipse

> If you get involved with someone kicking their dog or hitting their kid, then they may start attacking you.  Not an easy situation to deal with.



You can go to a secure location and call the cops.

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## Koalafan

> I have really strong opinions about this and I don't want to go into a lot of detail, because I don't want to start an argument with anyone, but it really pisses me off when people turn a blind eye to abuse or assault that they're clearly aware is going on. It absolutely triggers my PTSD, especially because it's happened to me personally.
> The thing that happened to me that caused my PTSD, everyone around me turned a blind eye to so the person got away with it when they should have gone to prison.
> I was also bullied the whole time I was growing up, and the teachers were always aware it was going on but didn't do jack [BEEP] about it. My parents would call the school about it and the faculty would tell them there was nothing going on and that I was exaggerating. It got to the point of me doing something really drastic because I felt like no one was listening and no one cared.
> My partner was also physically and sexually abused by his mother as a child and his dad and brother never reported it so she got away with it for essentially the rest of his life.
> In my personal opinion, people who don't report/get involved in abuse and assault cases are just as bad as the perpetrators and deserve similar punishment.







> I had something similar happen. I was abused by someone in my family... and so the family wasn't tore apart, it got a blind eye from everyone in it 
> 
> I"m sorry you went through that  And your partner...  --- childhood abuse isn't an 'excuse' for adult actions. But I deffo can see why some adults are very messed up....   I hope you can/ have found peace/ healing 
> 
> I agree. I made an emotional thread about that a few days ago re: similar punishment --- esp to do with things like seeing someone be assaulted and raped. I honestly think they should be charged with the same thing or very similar, depending on how serious the situation is.



Really agree with everything being said. If someone is doing something as messed up as rape or assault you should absolutely notify the police as soon as possible. The thing that sucks about things happening in public is that someone always thinks someone else will do something (thap psychology degree is finally coming in handy) turning a blind eye when you know you could of helped someone makes me feel so queesy on the inside =\ 
Hugs to everyone here  :Hug:

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## lethargic nomad

> You can go to a secure location and call the cops.




I'd bet by the time cops got there, they would be long gone.  Have you ever reported anything?

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## HoldTheSea

> I had something similar happen. I was abused by someone in my family... and so the family wasn't tore apart, it got a blind eye from everyone in it 
> 
> I"m sorry you went through that  And your partner...  --- childhood abuse isn't an 'excuse' for adult actions. But I deffo can see why some adults are very messed up....   I hope you can/ have found peace/ healing 
> 
> I agree. I made an emotional thread about that a few days ago re: similar punishment --- esp to do with things like seeing someone be assaulted and raped. I honestly think they should be charged with the same thing or very similar, depending on how serious the situation is.



I'm so sorry you went through that too  ::(:   :Hug:  It's not fair that your family ignored it  ::(: 

While what my partner did was not excusable in any way, I do understand why he felt the way he did, he went through some very serious trauma as a child and as an adult as well.
I have started the healing process, but it's still not easy. I still struggle a lot. I hope you are able to find peace and healing as well  :Hug: 

I completely agree that they should be charged with the same thing!





> You can go to a secure location and call the cops.



Very true.





> Really agree with everything being said. If someone is doing something as messed up as rape or assault you should absolutely notify the police as soon as possible. The thing that sucks about things happening in public is that someone always thinks someone else will do something (thap psychology degree is finally coming in handy) turning a blind eye when you know you could of helped someone makes me feel so queesy on the inside =\ 
> Hugs to everyone here



I have noticed that people always think someone else will do something, and the fact that people have that kind of mentality is very frustrating!
I have a psychology degree too btw  ::): 
I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I had turned a blind eye when I knew I could have helped someone. I still kind of feel that way about my partner tbh. While I didn't intentionally turn a blind eye, I do feel as though I could have done more to help or save him.

Hugs to everyone here from me as well  :Hug:

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## Total Eclipse

> I'd bet by the time cops got there, they would be long gone.  Have you ever reported anything?



I've reported any abuse I've seen-- whilst I've been an adult. As a child I saw abuse and didn't know I was able to call services. I've called CPS on a couple, that was later discovered the father was molesting the little girl  ::(:  . They found that out by my report that she was being badly treated by the mother in public.

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## Cassie

I knew a girl growing up down the street from me we were close I knew she was abused I was maybe 10 her dad used to smack her across the face and at times she would hide behind my friends couch and or say cps was coming to take her their home was filled off dog feces it was a mess disgusting I occasionally told my mom something was going on could she do something she never did all I know Around the time she was hiding behind couches and acting scared etc she disappeared like it was weird then true whole trailer was empty and everything was removed and maybe they were evicted idk but I remember in high school asking one of her best friends what happen to her and she?s like you never heard I?m like heard what and she?s like her step mom or aunt or whatever she was to her known of us really knew she wasn?t allowed to address them as mom and dad but she ended up saying the female adult who cared for her ended up beating her 3 year old brother until he passed. I mean I was told by her best friend in 9th grade this happen so am I 100% sure I really hope that did not happen I?m mad that many people knew she was being abused and did nothing to my mom to my other friends mom etc 


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