# Struggles and Support > Frustration and Struggles >  >  Bogus pieces of advise and explanations for mental illness from people

## Otherside

So...I thought I'd just make a list. Feel free to add to it. They are probably exagerated, but, you do get a lot of BS. Especially on the internet. Not so much in real life. People in real life seem more likely to talk sense. But then, you do get the occasional idiot.


"*Join the army"* (Did I mention bipolar is on the list of "can't join?")*"You don't need those meds! All you need to do is go to Church, because gods love will cure you!"* (With due respect to anyone who is religious on here, every time I hear that I can't help but think "BS")*"The problem is modern life. You need to throw away your telelvision, computer, phone, IPod, every source of modern life there is and live like a hermit in the desert somewhere. That should solve your social anxiety"* (No, idiot. Avoiding people isn't solving it.)*"It's a problem with your diet! Try cutting out everything that isn't poppy seeds out of your diet"* (Yeah...okay. Whilst I get that diet can make an impact on MI, somehow, a lot of them seem extreme. Or the best one...which isn't exagerated...)*"Why don't you try the Atkins diet?"* (Which I thought was for weight loss. And not for solving anxiety.)

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## Chantellabella

> So...I thought I'd just make a list. Feel free to add to it. They are probably exagerated, but, you do get a lot of BS. Especially on the internet. Not so much in real life. People in real life seem more likely to talk sense. But then, you do get the occasional idiot.
> 
> 
> "*Join the army"* (Did I mention bipolar is on the list of "can't join?")*"You don't need those meds! All you need to do is go to Church, because gods love will cure you!"* (With due respect to anyone who is religious on here, every time I hear that I can't help but think "BS")*"The problem is modern life. You need to throw away your telelvision, computer, phone, IPod, every source of modern life there is and live like a hermit in the desert somewhere. That should solve your social anxiety"* (No, idiot. Avoiding people isn't solving it.)*"It's a problem with your diet! Try cutting out everything that isn't poppy seeds out of your diet"* (Yeah...okay. Whilst I get that diet can make an impact on MI, somehow, a lot of them seem extreme. Or the best one...which isn't exagerated...)*"Why don't you try the Atkins diet?"* (Which I thought was for weight loss. And not for solving anxiety.)



I totally agree that you hear this from people who have* no clue* about true mental illness. 

Let me add more "words of wisdom" from people.


*"Just relax."* (uh, yeah, howwww?????)

*"*silence* *crickets* *don't give me eye contact* *shut me in a closet* *change the subject*"* (yes, shunning the crazy person helps them become sane)

*"Getting out more around people is the key to staying mentally healthy."* (Ok, true that fresh air can revive you, but what if the people who you go out with are those people who depress you, make you anxious, bully you, abuse you, criticize you, and generally make you feel like crap?)

*"Have you had your blood pressure checked?"* (oh yeah.......why didn't I think of that??! Of course, my whole problem with you screaming at me, lying about me, and ruining the last 5 years of my career is because my blood pressure is high! Duh! *smacks head* Funny how I didn't have any raised blood pressure before the abuse though. Hm.)

*"Join our church and your troubles will be healed."* (I believe in God, but when I hear that a "church" will solve all my troubles I run screaming.)

I don't hear this one so much anymore - *"It's video games. They make you anxious, violent and depressed."* (Actually when I do sit down to shoot balls with a very big laser gun, I feel less inclined to do it in real life. )

*"Get a dog."* (I have lots of cats, so no thank you. I already pick up enough cat shit. I don't need to pooper scoop dog [BEEP] now too)

I'm sure I'll add more later.

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## L

The one that makes me want to puncha nose is when someone says ' oh I get that too'

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## WintersTale

I once had a friend of mine tell me to just turn to God. 

I was like, "I'm _already_ a Christian!"

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## Misssy

The face to face customer service job I was doing did help my social anxiety. Though now I am not doing it because my feet and legs were ruined from standing for so long. Back to my introverted self again

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## Misssy

How about**: "you just need to loosen up a little"   "just need to put yourself out there more"   "just need to take a chance"   and the worst one  "just need to stop thinking about your own problems"

"just need to stop worrying what people think of you"

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## Otherside

Here's a new one that was on Tumblr:

*"You're a white, heterosexual, cisgender female so therefore, you cannot be depressed"* 

What the [BEEP] does my skin color have to do with anything?!

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## Bocconcini

*"don't be sad, cheer up already would ya"*

Uh, sure, let me just flip that switch I seem to have forgotten about...

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## cowgirls_dont_cry

"Just go run around the block!" 

"God never gives you more than you can bear."

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## Otherside

*There are people with really problems, think about all those starving children in Africa, you first world $&Â£^@?!

*And I'm just like "I am well aware of that, thank you. But sadly, thinking about starving children in Africa isn't going to make it go away."

Which leads onto my favorite one:

*"People have it worse than you!"*

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## nemmm3

> The one that makes me want to puncha nose is when someone says ' oh I get that too'



I know what you mean lasair, I have a friend who now thinks that she has anxiety just because i have it. she is always saying 'im a very anxious person' when she is actually the most confident and outgoing person i know. She also acts like she knows what i go through when she doesnt.

It just makes me so angry that she says this [BEEP] to me.

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## SmileyFace

> I know what you mean lasair, I have a friend who now thinks that she has anxiety just because i have it. she is always saying 'im a very anxious person' when she is actually the most confident and outgoing person i know. She also acts like she knows what i go through when she doesnt.
> 
> It just makes me so angry that she says this [BEEP] to me.



That is so annoying. I told a 'friend' that I experience bouts of depression from sexual abuse I dealt with years ago. Since then... she'd go, "Oh... I feel so depressed today. I've been eating so horribly... I'm not getting enough food... I have the $$$ to go grocery shopping, but I don't have the time or energy because work is so overwhelming."

Well tough shit, you idiot. You're depressed over THAT? Then she proceeds to describe how this "hunger" is making her suffer and how it's making her life one of the worst ever. In my head, it's like... ok, do you want to know what depression and anxiety is like?? Do you really want to know what it's like??? Why don't we switch lives, and you can tell me what depression/anxiety is really like. Because I would LOVE to be in her shoes... she grew up with a decent family, was rather well off.. and she's doing this awesome college program at Disney World. And she was never abused (not that I know of, at least... but still).

It's like... please shut up.

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## Otherside

> I know what you mean lasair, I have a friend who now thinks that she has anxiety just because i have it. she is always saying 'im a very anxious person' when she is actually the most confident and outgoing person i know. She also acts like she knows what i go through when she doesnt.
> 
> It just makes me so angry that she says this [BEEP] to me.



I have very little time or patience for people who feel the need to self-diagnose or fake an illness they know nothing about. Or diagnose themselves based on the scores of an online test. There's one that apparently screens for personality disorders that I see a lot of people posting all over the internet. Magiccally, everyone seems to have scored positive for at least three different types of personality disorders. Meanwhile, it's taken a year of actually seeing professionals for them to come to that conclusion, rather than some stupid test that took five minutes. 

It's one of the worst things you can do, and it's just so fucking disrespectful to the people who suffer from it_._

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## minted

I hate it when someone says "just stop thinking about it"

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## Chloe

My favourite one from my own father when I told him about me panicking when I went on a girls night out "it's because you don't get out enough".... I don't go out because alcohol makes it worse !!! And yes there's the argument of cutting down but you don't go to the beach and just sit in the sand. Another favourite also from my father "it's not normal there's something wrong with you"...... Thanks great diagnosis !!

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## GunnyHighway

The best line ever that both my parents gave to me:

*Just get over it.

*
Hah.

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## Chloe

I've had that from a 'friend'

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## Keddy

When my mom tries to blame every little emotion I have on my depression and my mood issues. Like "Oh, it's just a mood swing. You're not really angry," or "Your life isn't really that hard. It's just your depression talking."

Or when my teachers in elementary school didn't even take into consideration that I had any diagnosis (which I did have a few already at that point), they just wrote into my progress reports that I was "different" and had "trouble relating to other students." That hurt.

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