# Anxiety Disorders > Unsure and Other Mental Health Issues >  >  What does "I'm fighting a war inside of me" mean?

## Otherside

I've seen this a lot on Tumblr. Like this.



But what does that actually mean? That you're fighting to stay in control of your head? That you're faking a smile although everything is not okay?

I just don't get it. 

And does anyone know how you fake being happy when you're depressed. I end up just "fakjing" or trying to act as though I'm not in a depressed state.

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## Chantellabella

Well, in my case, there actually is one.  ::):

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## Otherside

> Well, in my case, there actually is one.



Yer, I guess there is.

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## Antidote

I really loathe those tumblr memes. Supposed to be poignant but just comes across as trite.

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## Otherside

> I really loathe those tumblr memes. Supposed to be poignant but just comes across as trite.



See, I don't like them much either. I have a tumblr and I post the occasional bipolar owl meme on there at times, or one that says "I hate being bipolar-it's awesome". If anything, because it makes me laugh slightly. But I don't get these ones about depression and there being a "war inside of me" or how you "wake up every day and fake a smile and no-one cares"...because that's not how I'd describe depression. I get that some people find it theraputic blogging or tumbling about depression. I just don't get the majority of them.

I just don't get how depression is a war inside of you.

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## Chantellabella

> I just don't get how depression is a war inside of you.



I know that when I'm in a severe depression, my mind tells me that I should be happy because I'm with my grandkids playing or at a movie, but my emotions are sad. It's like my mind is disconnected from my body.

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