# Struggles and Support > Frustration and Struggles >  >  I need help. I am an alcoholic.

## Sagan

I have a serious problem with alcoholism. It runs in my family. My  mother and grandmother were very heavy drinkers. I drink every day and  it is only making everything worse in my life. Everything from pushing  away the people that care about me the most. To coming on here drunk  saying stupid things and making a fool of myself.

I am wondering if any former drinkers could give me some advice on how  to stop or at least cut down. It's become a daily habit I have found to  be terribly difficult to break. Even for one day. I am sick and tired of  the person I become when I drink. But it's so hard to stop. Any advice  is appreciated.

 ::(:

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## life

please dont go cold turkey as it can kill you or cause serious damage to your body, please go and see your doctor. Imho i can give you no advice, from my personal experience, no treatment or groups will help you cut your drinking, if you are not ready and in the right place emotionally to quit. The only advice i can give is never stop trying to give up alcohol. Good luck and if you need anyone to talk to pm me any time.

how to contradict myself  ::(:

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## Koalafan

Sagaaaannnn  ::(:   :Hug:  alcoholism runs rampant in my family too which is exactly why I try to stay away from alcohol and am a very occasional drinker at the most. My advice is to slowly ween yourself off....depending on how much your drinking, quitting cold turkey can be BRUTAL and even life threatening in extreme cases. And while you're weening yourself off it's important too replace the drinking with another healthier habit in it's place (harm reduction). This is why you see former alcoholics drinking alot of coffee and smoking lots of cigarettes...cant say I recommend the cigarette part at all  :Tongue: . Then after that try to take yourself out of ANY situation where alcohol might be present. Take it out of your house, avoid stores that sell it (or at the least liquor ailes) and just try to limit oppurtunities where alcohol might be present. The less alcohol you come in contact with the less chance of a relapse. And of course the most important thing is that you surround yourself with people who support your decision and make sure you can stay clean (like the people on AS for instance that really care about you!!  :Celebrate:  ).

Remember quitting alcohol isn't going to be easy and relapses are PERFECTLY normal. No one gets it in one shot and you shouldn't blame yourself if it does take more than one shot. So don't beat yourself up about it if it does happen! And also don't forget about some koala hugs as well!!  :Celebrate:   :Hug:   :koala:

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## Coffee

Do you have an AA group near you? That's pretty much the go-to move when people realise they have a drinking problem. It's actually really helpful and you can get a lot of advice on what to do. It definitely helped me in the initial stages and it has helped other people I know that have drinking problems.

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## Sagan

Thanks for the advice guys.  :Hug:  I will bring it up next doctors visit. I guess the first step is realizing and admitting there is a problem. I initially thought about AA meetings. But my SA is such that going would be very difficult. I used to only drink casually a little over a year ago. Then after my best friend moved I began drinking by myself. A couple times a week at first then it became an everyday thing. I think I am going to try and cut down by half today. When I get a craving go for a run or bike ride.  If I can give up smoking, which was very difficult. I can give up drinking. It's going to be tough. But I have to do it. For me, and for my family.

I suppose I should have this thread moved as it doesn't fit the forums purpose (Off-topic. Stop thinking about problems and relax!)  :;):

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## Sagan

I looked online to see if there were medications to tread alcohol addiction. I found that Benzos are often prescribed when one quits drinking. I'm already on a Benzo so I don't know about that. then there is a medication that makes you literally sick  if you drink at all. I think the latter would be a last resort type thing. If I can't find the strength to cut down on my own. 

But I am ready. No more denying it, and no more excuses.

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## VickieKitties

Good luck, brother.  Be strong, you can overcome anything.  ::):

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## Coffee

Antabuse has been shown to work but as you said I think it's a last resort thing. I'd stay away from additional benzos because as mentioned previously it's really easy to get hooked on to something else while trying to get rid of alcohol, so try to stay clear of anything else potentially addictive. Have you been managing to cut down?

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## Chantellabella

> Do you have an AA group near you? That's pretty much the go-to move when people realise they have a drinking problem. It's actually really helpful and you can get a lot of advice on what to do. It definitely helped me in the initial stages and it has helped other people I know that have drinking problems.



I agree with coffee. I've tried to kick addictions alone, but found it was impossible. Either AA or CR groups might be helpful because they make you accountable for your actions and slip ups. If you're too anxious to go to a group, there may be online groups. You may also be able to contact a group leader and find out if he would be your sponsor one on one until you felt comfortable enough to join the group. CR (Celebrate Recovery) for me was a life saver with the addictions I had. 

Alcohol is a depressant btw. When I was in grad school for counseling I learned about how alcohol and drugs mess up your ability to produce hormones that you need to feel good. If you keep filling those spots in your brain with the fake stuff, your body stops producing what you need on it's own. That's basically why when you start cutting back you feel depressed and like shit. You have to rev up your exercise, take B vitamins and get your butt with someone who will sit on you if they have to, to get you to not drink. 

Believe me, I've played addiction games for years, so if you truly want to get rid of it, get some humility and seek help. Pride was my biggest enemy and once I admitted I had a problem and couldn't do it on my own, I started heading in the right direction.

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## Sagan

I tried cutting down my intake by half but was unsuccessful, though I did drink less than I normally do by about a quarter. I am defiantly going to ask for my doctors help. I read about another medication that I guess makes you unable to get drunk or a buzz when you drink, taking the point out of it (for me at least). I'm already on Mirtaz. Klono. Effex. and Risp. I don't know If I want to ad another to the cocktail. But I will wait and see what my doctor says.

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## Sagan

Strong urge to drink. Trying to resist. I dumped all the alcohol I had at home down the drain. It would foolish to go to the store just to buy more, and a waste of money. I can do this!

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## Sagan

Almost 2 weeks sober!  :Celebrate:

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## life

congratulations  :boogie:

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## Sagan

Thank you Life! Whenever I think about drinking, which is often. I go outside and go for a nice long run, and by the time I get back home all sweaty and hot. I take a nice shower and relax. It really helps a lot. I found it important to replace the absence of alcohol with something else, something healthy. So far so good. It's not easy, it's a battle. But it's a battle I am determined to win!

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## life

i found boredom was the worst thing to overcome, sounds like youve solved that problem with your long runs  ::):

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## Crylie

I almost slipped into an alcohol dependency. My family are nearly all alcoholics--especially my grandmother, and now I am seeing the pattern emerge in my mother--and addictive personalities run in my family. Two of my uncles died from drug over-doses. When I first started showing signs of severe anxiety in my early teens my mom would give me a (1) beer and it would immediately calm me down. I could sleep. I guess I have/had a low alcohol tolerance because one and a half beers was enough to make me drunk. Eventually I started to want it and then need it when I knew an anxiety attack or a spike in anxious discomfort was coming up and I knew that was unhealthy. This isn't exactly a horror story because I was able to realize this as me standing on my tip-toes at the edge of a cliff just in the nick of time, and I was able to pull away from alcohol as my number one savior from anxiety, but I do understand the panic and shame of knowing you have a problem with addiction.

I am also really young and unexperienced so I don't know a whole lot about these issues and what happens with a long-term addiction. I just wanted to share--solidarity. I hope everything goes well for you. I really, really do. I've lost a lot of people in my family to alcoholism one way or another. I am very sorry.

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## Crylie

> Thank you Life! Whenever I think about drinking, which is often. I go outside and go for a nice long run, and by the time I get back home all sweaty and hot. I take a nice shower and relax. It really helps a lot. I found it important to replace the absence of alcohol with something else, something healthy. So far so good. It's not easy, it's a battle. But it's a battle I am determined to win!



Oh I am so happy for this now!!  ::D:

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## Sagan

Thank you Crylie. I am a month drink free now. It's hard because I used to enjoy a drink while going on the forums. Made it easier to express feelings and share thoughts. But the next day I would wake up and think. "oh No" what did I say/post? I'm either banned or alienated friends. I would say a lot of stupid things and create problems here. But as I haven't had a drink for a while, I feel like I have more energy and while drinking would help my anxiety overall, it caused bigger problems in the long run. It is hard and it is a struggle. But I am determined and so far, my determination has payed off  ::):

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## IllusionOfHappiness

So glad to hear you're making so much progress with this! Best of luck.  :Hug:

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## Koalafan

Very proud of you Sagan! Glad to hear everything is going well!  ::D:   :Hug:

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## Coffee

> Thank you Crylie. I am a month drink free now. It's hard because I used to enjoy a drink while going on the forums. Made it easier to express feelings and share thoughts. But the next day I would wake up and think. "oh No" what did I say/post? I'm either banned or alienated friends. I would say a lot of stupid things and create problems here. But as I haven't had a drink for a while, I feel like I have more energy and while drinking would help my anxiety overall, it caused bigger problems in the long run. It is hard and it is a struggle. But I am determined and so far, my determination has payed off



When was your one month? Like what date? I want to remember this for future months. It always helps to have a personal cheerleader  ::):

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## Sagan

Well I am extremely disappointed  with my self. I fell off the wagon. I was getting suicidal texts from my sister. Very stressful. I took that as an excuse to drink last night. I feel like I have let everyone down   ::  I acted really stupid last night as well, on the forum. Stupid Stupid Stupid. All I can do now is start over and take things one day at a time. This was a major set back. Man I feel bad.

I am sorry everyone.  ::(:

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## Sagan

> When was your one month? Like what date? I want to remember this for future months. It always helps to have a personal cheerleader



7/20 was one month  ::(:

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## Koalafan

Don't be so hard on yourself Sagan!  :Hug:  Addiction is INCREDIBLY hard to break and everyone relapses at some point. Quitting an addiction definitely doesn't take after 1 shot or even many shots it takes many tries but remember we are to support you!!!!!!!!  :Hug:

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## life

sagan dont worry about it, try again and see if u can last longer, imho every day without alcohol is a victory, try not to put so much pressure on yourself as it makes it harder for you to quit. good luck

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## Chantellabella

> Well I am extremely disappointed  with my self. I fell off the wagon. I was getting suicidal texts from my sister. Very stressful. I took that as an excuse to drink last night. I feel like I have let everyone down   I acted really stupid last night as well, on the forum. Stupid Stupid Stupid. All I can do now is start over and take things one day at a time. This was a major set back. Man I feel bad.
> 
> I am sorry everyone.



nothing to be sorry about. 2 steps forward 1 back. thats how it works. it dont help to beat yoiurself up. so dont say sorry. before you didnt even know and now you do ok. so dont feel bad. your human ok. were all human.

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## Sagan

Thank you for the support, friends. Means a lot. Never thought it would be this hard. I can remember not long ago, just after my divorce I used to get asked by my mom when I would visit her, or my sister "you wanna beer?" I would always say no because I didn't like the taste. always drank tea or water. then all of the sudden I was accepting every time. Then drinking by my self, and so on.

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## Inscrutable Banana

If you ask anybody who has been sober for a while after recovering from a substance abuse problem I'm sure they'll tell you they had more than their fair share of relapses before they were finally able to keep at it for a really long period of time. It's to be expected and certainly isn't something to be ashamed of, so don't let it discourage you. Get right back on that wagon with renewed determination and make it a goal to beat your old record, one day at a time.

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## Chantellabella

when i see people drinking sodas i want one so bad. sometimes i give in and buy one. i take a sip and go yuck and end up throwing it away. youll get to the point where if you slip and take a sip itll be yuck too

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## life

> If you ask anybody who has been sober for a while after recovering from a substance abuse problem I'm sure they'll tell you they had more than their fair share of relapses before they were finally able to keep at it for a really long period of time. It's to be expected and certainly isn't something to be ashamed of, so don't let it discourage you. Get right back on that wagon with renewed determination and make it a goal to beat your old record, one day at a time.



 i agree 100%

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## molokini25

Don't be too harsh on yourself. If you got a chance to quit once, you will be able to do it again.  ::):

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