Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    Forum Addiction:

    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    0 Post(s)

    Reconnected with a friend last night. What should I do?

    Last night, I went to see a band play with a group of friends. The band consisted of people that I used to go to school with, and so it was natural that I might run into some of these people. One in particular made an impression - a girl I'd been very fond of in when I was around 15 or 16, before I left that school. I'd say we were friends then, but not in the "talk most days, hang out all the time" way. Still, she came to a party or two of mine, and when she went to Spain for 10 months, I Skyped with her. But since I'd moved schools after that, we hadn't seen each other much, if at all.

    Anyway, back to last night. She's there with a friend of hers, who I also know vaguely. When she sees me, her eyes light up, she smiles and hugs me. We talk a little - it's clear she's a little tipsy, but hey, it's a night out. Then she goes off to watch the band. That would be the end of it, except that once the concert was over, I went over to say goodbye to her and a few people I knew. She hugged me again, and told me that she got really excited when she saw me, and missed me. I told her I missed her too. Honestly, I sort of felt like suggesting we catch up at some point, but for whatever reason I didn't.

    That's where the trouble starts. All day, I've been thinking about sending her a Facebook message, just saying it was great seeing her, and we should catch up. But, as has often been the case with these sorts of things for me, I find myself scared of what will happen and unable to make myself do it. I've had a few bad experiences before where things seemed to be going well with a girl, and then I asked them if they'd like to hang out sometime (without immediate romantic intent), and they straight up reject me. If it was a rejection of a date, it would be easier to handle. In these cases, though, I feel like they're rejecting me as a friend or even as a person in general. Overall, in this most recent case, I think that it would be a good idea (the odds are even in my favour), but every time I think about doing it, I get a big pang of anxiety and fear.

    I guess what I'm asking is, anyone who reads this - how would you proceed in my position? What do you do to make yourself do something like this, something you're scared of? Logically, I know it's best just to leap in, but that's easier said than done. Any and all advice welcome.

  2. #2
    Forum Addiction:

    Join Date
    Feb 2017
    somewhere only I know
    I'm feeling
    16 Post(s)
    This is what I would call a ‘healthy risk’. All of your different emotions are normal, imo, and I think sending a message, or reaching out is a wonderful idea.
    Don’t wait much longer...

Made with <3
Anxiety Space is not a replacement for a fully qualified doctor.