I've used up all my counselling time at college. The counsellor a going to refer me through to the GP to get me long term sessions. gave me some books to look at and a website for this new meditation thing to try . But I'm at a loss of what to do now. I'm still panicking, it's getting more sensitive and the only improvement is that I can stop myself from panicking 25% of the time. But that's after 3 years. So does that mean another 3 years till I'm normal again or is this just a blip where it's only going to go downhill from here ?? We touched up on as well while talking about how I don't feel many other guys who would be even remotely intrested in me would put up with this. I just don't see it happening and while I don't feel like I have to be with Matty because he helps me with this and that's why I have to stay with him I don't if heaven forbid anything did happen I would break up with him if it was better for me and or him but there's just this huge uncertainty of if I'll ever be normal no matter how long it takes for me to sort my head out. Just want to go home and cry and not have to see anyone while I've got all this over my head.
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