Pickin' and Grinnin'!
It does offend me. Normally I'm not offended easy especially not by words, but I think the reason
is it makes me look at the world and I feel like saaay a black person in the year 1914.
Didn't humans develop at all since 100 years ago?
I think not as a species, no, (or else ever so slightly) only more from a technology standpoint.
I've watched people use the term over and over.
Nice to be reminded of what society thinks of me....
The Awkward Conversationalist
I know how you feel, Skippy
Since most people who don't know me well perceive me as a straight man, they have no idea that saying "that's gay" or "what a gay thing to do" as if they're saying "that's stupid" will offend me and hurt me. They have no idea that I have a boyfriend. It's hurtful and insensitive. Even if I WASN'T gay, that doesn't give them the excuse to be tossing it around as an insult in the first place. This happens to me a lot at work.
It also irritates me that people assume that "all gay men are feminine" so they automatically assume that I'm straight.
People don't all fit the stereotype of their sexuality! Not all gay men are girly and not all lesbians are masculine. It's disgusting that society sees it that way.
Just because I look masculine and I dress masculine and my bf is that way too, does not mean we are straight men.
Sorry if I went off on a rant there and offended anybody, I get really fired up about this topic.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
Using "gay" as a negative was very in vogue when I was in high school. I wanted to be like, "people still do that??" But then I remembered that wasn't that long ago. Of course people still do that. High school was not quite a decade ago and I've heard people still use the word "colored" to describe African Americans. I've always been friends with other progressive-minded people, so (if the person is named Ryan, for example) we'd be like, "Yeah... That's so RYAN. Like a [BEEP] cupcake with RYAN frosting. So lame." Because yeah, it's the same thing and that's not ok.
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -- Maya Angelou
I feel the same way when people call someone a "retard." Two of my children are disabled and my granddaughter is very disabled. She is no less of a human being and neither are my children. Yet, people insist on using that insult.
The Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about
Pickin' and Grinnin'!
Yah i hate the stereotype. I'm just a guy who happens to like guys. That's all.Keddy
I know how you feel, Skippy
Since most people who don't know me well perceive me as a straight man, they have no idea that saying "that's gay" or "what a gay thing to do" as if they're saying "that's stupid" will offend me and hurt me. They have no idea that I have a boyfriend. It's hurtful and insensitive. Even if I WASN'T gay, that doesn't give them the excuse to be tossing it around as an insult in the first place. This happens to me a lot at work.
It also irritates me that people assume that "all gay men are feminine" so they automatically assume that I'm straight.
People don't all fit the stereotype of their sexuality! Not all gay men are girly and not all lesbians are masculine. It's disgusting that society sees it that way.
Just because I look masculine and I dress masculine and my bf is that way too, does not mean we are straight men.
Sorry if I went off on a rant there and offended anybody, I get really fired up about this topic.
In fact I find femmy guys a turn off....lol
I've got to the point where I just dun care no more.
I'll just walk over all non chalant like n' slap em quickly across the head with a book next time I see it.
The Awkward Conversationalist
The R-word (I don't like to say the word, it makes me cringe) is another one of my pet peeves. I was a victim of that insult for years when I was younger.
That is absolutely true- Disabled people are no less of a human being than anyone else is. The fact that people throw around the R-word about them or anyone else is sickening. It's a word that shouldn't even exist in the English language, in my not-so-humble opinion.
This stuff is why I've seriously thought about being a human rights activist.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
Nasty words will always be used, sadly. I will not stand next to someone who uses such fowl language and I usually voice up if I hear it - it has come to the stage where someone will look at me and apologise before or after using such a word (or when bitching about people). I have gay friends so it offends me too.
life---><---me
Habitual Failure
I think it's ridiculous too, but I take a different view of it. Well, I try to take a different view.
I remember in junior high, the term "gay" being used as a generic insult, was tossed around all the time. Most of the people using it that way aren't really thinking of anyone's sexuality at all; they've been conditioned to use that term and it's probably a hard habit to break.
I'm not trying to offend anyone, I'm not a fan of using it that way and I'm not a fan of using the term "retarded" to describe something that someone doesn't agree with or understand either; but I'm just trying to be more open lately and I honestly don't think most of the people doing it are trying to be nasty. I could be wrong though, I'm not very good at analyzing people
I agree that it can be just a habit. Much like the "n" word was years ago. It was a learned behavior.
But those who use these terms show their ignorance in my opinion. What I mean by ignorance is that they would rather just follow the norm without even considering what it means. I have relatives who still are prejudiced toward people of color.
I understand that they "don't know any better" and it's a "habit." But I don't accept it from them. Accepting their behavior and allowing them to do it around me is not being open in my opinion. It's being in agreement with them.
So I ask them not to use it around me because I have a right to not be bombarded by it.
The Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about
Yes I agree! I grew up using the R-word all the time as an insult, but then someone pointed out to me why it's harmful and I stopped. Then I started working with Developmentally Disabled people and now it really bothers me as well. But it really wasn't that hard to stop. It's called thinking before you speak.
And if a negative word can get so ingrained in your language that it is difficult to stop using, maybe you say too many negative things! The words we choose to use say a lot about how we see the world.
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -- Maya Angelou
At college today I head the word. My response to that is the classic mucky look if I hear it from anyone and I turned around and the term was being used by a group of people with learning difficulties who years ago would have been described as the very word they were using. The word gay was also thrown around by that group of people. See that I don't think is right it is ignorance because they don't even know that they're insulting themselves almost by describing each other's behaviour as gay or retarded. But obviously people aren't being told don't use that word like they were with the n word. It has become mainstream and commonplace of a word. Thankfully i have family and some friends who are actually considerate and don't lower themselves to using offensive words which could unknowingly insult others (sorry if we sound like snobs there were not we just don't say retard or gay)
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