I think I'm having a delayed stress reaction...
Bad news last night regarding the case. Not the end of the world, but not great, either. After I heard, made a valiant attempt to stay calm. Went and took a hot bath, listened to music, firmed up my resolve to see this thing to the end. Felt pretty ok. Felt pretty damn decent, actually. But I took 2 ambien for sleep, rather than one, to be sure I wouldn't be up all night stressing.
Talked to the other woman involved in all of this today. Up until our conversation, I was puttering around, still in a decent mood. Felt ok, I thought.
But upon closer examination, I realize I woke up with ambien hangover. And then started drinking wine early this afternoon, as well as overeating. Too much sugar, more wine. Tried super hard to feel a good as I've felt the last few days, too hard maybe. Laid around all day, which just made me sore and stiff. Ate more, and more, until stomach felt sick.
Unraveling this evening. I was watching the Manziel debut and just getting angrier and angrier - cannot stand that guy. Talked to my brother in law about how he was playing, and just got further pissed off. BIL was teasing me, but I couldn't take any of the jokes. Snapped back at him, being ugly sarcastic. Tried reading - no good. Being a smartass to people around me, every little fucking thing is getting to me. Can't sleep now.
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Nightingale
