Anything bothering you right now?

[Otherside]

Don't want to write the entire thing out again, I've written this out to a lot of people so I'll just copy/paste the complaint email I sent to uni. I had to go to an assessment today with a company called ATOS in regards to Personal Indepence Payments - which are a benefits payment here made if you're disabled.

The reason that I am contacting you is in regards to an incident that happened today. I had to attend an assessment with regards to receiving Personal Independence Payment today, and due to anxiety about attending this assessment, my mentor - redacted - offered to attend with me, and offered to give her view on how my condition had affected me within the last few weeks, as it has begun to get worse. She also asked if her attendance could be regarded as a mentoring session so she could be paid. I agreed to this, due to the fact that I appreciated her support during the assessment. I was told that I could do this.

I attended the assessment today accompanied by my Father, who had driven me over to the assessment centre and who - due to my anxiety - had also agreed to attend with me. My mentor had already arrived, and was not pleased to see that I had not arrived alone. She asked if my Father intended to sit in with me during the assessment, and I confirmed that he did. At this point she declared that "I had not told her that someone else would be attending" and made for the exit. She did not attend the assessment with me.

Despite the fact that I find her behavior extremely unprofessional, it caused me considerable distress, anxiety and embarrassment in a situation that was difficult enough for me as it was. I am also certain that I did inform her that my parents had offered to come with me to the assessment, although I do not understand why this made any difference in the circumstances, or why my Fathers attendance caused her to behave in the way that she did. No explanation was given from her as to why she felt she could not attend if another person attended with me.

I feel extremely let down by this incident, and unless there is an extremely good reason for the behavior today, I feel that I cannot continue receiving mentoring services with redacted. I have a mentoring session on Wednesday, but due to the incident today, I feel a complete lack of trust and currently feel as though it is not worth attending.

I feel like utter crap, and after discussing the email with uni on the phone, it turns out that the mentor is contracted out to a private company. Uni have told the company that the session on Wednesday in canceled. I have to wait for a phone call on Thursday to discuss this with the head of the team who'll back me up in dealing with this.

And now my partners deciding to harang me about why I'm not visiting him today. Fucking great.

[Member11]

...

I'm sorry you have to go through that They all need a

[Otherside]

I'm sorry you have to go through that They all need a

Yup, basically.

I'm half expecting to recieve an email tonight requesting I authorize payment for her attending for that "mentoring session" that I apparently had.

[SmileyFace]

This horrible headache I've had since right before I left work for the day.

[Otherside]

I don't whether to feel angry, hurt, let down, confused, or what.

Person who fucked up yesterday at my PIP assessment contacted me today and said I had and meeting with her at six. I was like, okay, wtf. Usually it's five, you know I'm done at five. I'm not sticking around for an hour wth nothing to do. Besides, what makes you think I want to continue receiving support with you after what happened on Monday? And maybe I'm reading into this, but somethings off. I never get texts reminding me of my meetings. And I'm pretty sure I cancelled this meeting.

So I say that I cancelled the meetings, and apologize if the message did not get to her. I also say I don't want anymore. Doesn't ask why, but goes on to say "appreciated letting her know monday" (letting her know what exactly? That my father was coming to the meeting. I did, and that doesn't excuse how she behaved at all as a professional, nor do I need to seek permission for my father to come), says she was "happy to support me" (somehow I did not get that impression from the way she stormed out of the waiting room and refused to attend the assesment, but might just be me, of course), and then has the cheek to say that I should have sent her a text to apologize for the inconvenience! (The [BEEP]?!). I showed that to Dad, and he just shook his head in disbelief. Not even worth a reply.

I later get a message saying "she may have dealt with the situation better by not walking out the building in frustration." Well no [BEEP] Sherlock, although I'm not entirely sure what the "situation" was because as far as I was aware, there wasn't even one in the first place, and I saw no reason for her not to attend. And no, she hasn't explained to me what the "situation" is exactly. Not going to reply to that either.

I'm not sure what I have to apologize for, or what I apparently did wrong. And far as inconvenience goes, I could have done with the support yesterday during that meeting. I keep replaying it over in my head, trying to work out what the hell was going on in her head, trying to work out what I did wrong. Everyone tells me that she was out of line, everyone who was there in that waiting room was shocked, and couldn't work out what on earth her problem was, and couldn't believe she behaved as she did.

Regardless though, I feel as though any faith I had in her has been shattered by this incident, and certainly, without any explanation or apology, there's no way in hell I feel as though I can continue to see her as a mentor, or continue seeing her through support. And to be honest, I could be done without having to deal with Uni in order to get any sort of support sorted once again. It's fucking ridiculous.

[HoldTheSea]

I don't whether to feel angry, hurt, let down, confused, or what.
...

I don't know what to say other than I'm here if you need someone to talk/vent to. What a horrible experience, I'm so sorry.

[Member11]

...

I still think she needs a few

[PinkButterfly]

So sorry you had a bad day I miss working but I sure don't miss the issues at work but I would love to work again but then I am sure I would say WOW I hate working with some people and more.. Hope things get better!

[HoldTheSea]

I'm really angry again for some reason. I feel like breaking something. These feelings just never go away, do they? Fuck.
I've already vented nonstop to my friends and my therapist about everything and I think I've exhausted the topic.
I think I'm going to go hiking in the mountains with the dogs. I need to be far away from anything that reminds me of anything.

[Otherside]

I'm really angry again for some reason. I feel like breaking something. These feelings just never go away, do they? Fuck.
I've already vented nonstop to my friends and my therapist about everything and I think I've exhausted the topic.
I think I'm going to go hiking in the mountains with the dogs. I need to be far away from anything that reminds me of anything.

I do that too sometimes. :/ I can go on for hours and hours and hours. Supposedly talking about things makes you feel better, but damn, sometimes that fury is just still there, burning for what seems forever, and it seems as though you have to rage forever.

Going away and hiking somewhere might actually help. Not that I've tried it. I live in what must be the flatest area ever.

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[Otherside]

So just when I thought the situation couldn't get any more idiotic...

I get an email today requesting that I authorise payment for two hours worth of mentoring. No, the money does not come from me. But it comes from my alloted hours from SFE. Even better, it claims there was that I was absent due to "unforseen personal circumstances" and gave less than twenty four hours notice.

Yes, I appreciate the fact that I said I'd pay for the sessions if I actually did that. But I didn't. She stormed out. That's on her. Not me.

I have my suspects that it's an automated email sent after she fills in the timesheets, don't even know I'd the company knows. Called the company and asked them to call me back. Intend to tell them that there's no way in hell I'm authorising this given what happened, that the "absence reason" is not even remotely true and it wasn't an absence, and that I don't want to take this any further, but if this goes on, I will. This is getting ridiculous.

On the plus side, uni were sympathetic abd agreed she could have behaved better. As did the company...before I got the payment request.

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[HoldTheSea]

It's snowing... with thunder and lightning. That's a new one.
I'm babysitting, the kid is under the bed, and my dogs are hiding. Nothing freaks out my dogs more than a thunderstorm.

[Total Eclipse]

I'm feeling very emotionally and physically exhausted.. been up since 3am >.<

[anxiouskathie]

I'm feeling very emotionally and physically exhausted.. been up since 3am >.<

Hugs to you!

[Member11]

I got a kink in my neck, it won't go away