Afraid of Dying

[Keddy]

I'm a little ashamed to admit that I have a fear that's this stupid, but I've been having horrible anxiety since my surgery that I'm just now going to start having complications from it and I'm going to die. I know it's really stupid and it's been days since I've been home recovering but I'm really afraid. The past few days, it's gotten to the point where I've been waking up in the middle of the night afraid that I'm dying. I always turn out to be OK, but in the back of my mind, my anxiety is still telling me that I could die. I know how unlikely this scenario is, especially since it's a very low-risk surgery to begin with, but the fear and the anxiety are still there.
It could be that my anxiety is just out of whack because I'm still not feeling 100%. Either way, I'm scared for no reason.
Just wanted to get that off my chest... Does anyone have any suggestions for how to deal with irrational thoughts like this? They keep coming back even when I get medical advice and legitimate answers to my questions.

[SmileyFace]

Join the club. The fact that I won't live forever scares me to death (no pun intended). It just feels so unreal. I guess I've been taking life for granted or something to feel this way, but eh. It's gotten to the point where I TRULY realize that "You only live once" is truly something absolutely real. It's really weird to think about. I've had days where I'd wonder what it may be like to be dead and buried 6 feet into the ground. What about when my corpse has rotted away?

It all sounds pretty strange, crazy and creepy, but.. such thoughts have gone through my head time and time again for the past few years. It's really odd trying to get this through my head. I wish I could live forever... esp if I stay young (lol)...but it seems like reality is.. you don't. Nobody does It freaks me out so bad.

[Heelsbythebridge]

Maybe try making a checklist for yourself to check once or twice a day, once in the morning and before bed. Your discharge must have included instructions on symptoms to spot, like of infection or dehiscence. So maybe go down the list- Swelling? Nope. Fever? Nope. Drainage? Did you poop today? How is the pain? Etc. Then when you're done the list, you know you've checked everything comprehensively, and you are okay.