Posted a topic on Reddit, ranting about my overbearing mother. Got some comment or two that I didn't appreciate. Hardly anyone seems to understand what it's really like to be in an Asian family and how much control there is in most. Simply "trying to talk things out with your mom or move out" isn't that simple.
Earlier on this week I found out Mattys got a lot of pent up resentment/unresolved dealings with how I dealt with him self harming. The conversation took a turn from the worst. We stopped, I pretended all was well while we are dinner with his parents. They asked me to talk about another concern we had about him (just with smoking and energy drinks what got me and Matty onto the subject of self harming) and I was too terrified to say anything. I just carried on pretending all was well staying quiet but all the while I felt I was going to be sick I had to say something but I was so scared of another verbal outburst again.... Idk we need to talk about it I want to be there for him like he is for me. I acted out of fear in the past and he wasn't happy with that. Maybe now I know it's all over we can try talk It out again when he stays over this weekend![](images/smilies/classic/mellow.png ":\")
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The Awkward Conversationalist
I guess I can't see my own body accurately. My mom says I'm starting to look thinner and I know I've lost weight but I just can't see it. It doesn't help that my younger brother is always giving me crap about being overweight.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
reading about the ferry disaster in South Korea... what a horrible tragedy.. what a horrible way to die.. my heart goes out to the families
The Awkward Conversationalist
I just read that too... So sadKirsebaer
reading about the ferry disaster in South Korea... what a horrible tragedy.. what a horrible way to die.. my heart goes out to the families
I hope that they were able to find more survivors. How terrible. God bless those people
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
Happy Sparkles and Coffee
My body feels physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted past the limits of what I can take. I can't eat, sleep or relax. My overall body feels like I'm carrying around weights on a very overall sore body. Every single sound feels amplified and echoed, crushing my head as I hear it. Throbbing and tenseness, vomiting and feeling myself physically not handing this right yet I keep pushing myself.
Happy Sparkles and Coffee
**hugs** Try to stay positive!! What went wrong?
Happy Sparkles and Coffee
Yeahreading about the ferry disaster in South Korea... what a horrible tragedy.. what a horrible way to die.. my heart goes out to the families
Haha aw thankyou sweetieWhen I was 12 I set up a different account with a really offensive name, and whenever someone emails me, they get a bounceback to that account. It's really off-putting and I forgot about it because my Vancouver boss never made mention of it (she's known me for a while so I have some leeway, while employers in Montreal aren't going to give me any benefit of the doubt seeing as I'm already an Anglo and 3000 km away). I just fixed it so it would stop bouncing, but it might have been too late >.>
It's okay, I had planned to relax in Montreal anyways!!
Happy Sparkles and Coffee
**hugs**Bah. Who am I trying to kid. I'm just as lonely as everybody else. The feeling that something vital is missing is hard to ignore.
Rumors about my boyfriend telling others that I have "problems" & he wouldn't go back out with me for a $1,000,000 bucks. He denied them but went straight to bed after I brought them up like he was trying to avoid the topic.
So I hate to be the person complaining about a first world problem... Well it's not really complaining, just expressions of terror. I got a kind reply from another Montreal employer requesting to schedule an interview when I arrive, but this kind of terrifies. I'll basically touch down, sleep like maybe one or two nights, interview, and then work a week after that. In a city alone that may as well be in another country.
I'm so extraordinarily grateful and flattered that anyone would talk to me, but at the same time... I didn't actually expect anyone would talk to me. It's like a dog chasing its tail, it wouldn't know what to do if he caught it. Now I'm caught off guard and have to made a decision in a few hours. I haven't even slept yet.
I just want to forget about school and move far, far away. If I try to keep in touch with people I've met, it'll just bring back all of the memories that I'd rather forget.
Everyone's going to think I'm rude for ignoring them, but I feel like I have to do what's best for me. I can't live the rest of my life making other people happy and not caring about myself.
Bus preachers..listening to them makes me wanna bang my head against the seat in front me
killer of conversations
I don't have caller ID and somebody keeps calling me and not leaving a message. What is with people and doing this? My phone does tell me if the same person calls more than once, I just don't have the luxury of knowing who it is. I changed my voicemail greeting so that it didn't include my name. Leave a fucking message. What are you calling for if you're not going to leave a message? obviously you want something, because you called three times in the row. Just WTF.
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