Still tired and I have work in an hour. Maybe I need another coffee.
Still tired and I have work in an hour. Maybe I need another coffee.
I'm really anxious about a huge program that I'm doing today. We've had 1500, 800, 400, and always over 200 people attending our programs this summer.
I'm not sure why I'm worried about this one. I'm just really anxious. It'll be nice when summer programming is finally over. Yes, we have programs year round, but it's been crazy busy with these massive ones.
The Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about
Man, I gained back all the weight I lost.
Habitual Failure
I am, I'm bothering myself. All the progress I made was for shit, it doesn't mean anything. I'm just going to sit here, drink, take pills and cry about how I'll be lonely and miserable until I finally die because it's easier than feeling the horrible anxiety when I go out and try to do things.
Uuuuuuuuuuuhgh PMS bloat. Nothing fits and I feel like a walrus trying to put on jeans. Maybe I'll just stay home tonight.
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -- Maya Angelou
Idk why I always want to help people. No one wants my help. My help sucks.
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -- Maya Angelou
PMS bloats... and weight gain from PMS and stress here. Double the trouble lol. I feel like a freakin' whale.QuietCalamity
Haha same here. My bigger clothes barely fit before I got bloated. This is the biggest I've ever been. Depressing.
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -- Maya Angelou
I lost quite a bit of weight over the last several months... then I just gained it all back. I'm back to where I started (about 150 lbs). UGH
Hurts to see my BF is a bit insecure about our relationship, thinking I am seeing someone else...
The thunder outside sounds like it's happening 10 feet off of the ground. I'm waiting for thunder to come knock at my door at this point...olawdy.
I feel a little anxious about what I am taking on....I hope it works how I need it to
life---><---me
Habitual Failure
My grandmother just told me that I'm great and have a lot going for me. She thanked me for all the things I've been doing for her. I wish I believed that about myself, I know she's just saying that because it's what grandmothers do, I really don't have anything going for me, I'm a failure in life and I think I always will be.
This is making me cry now, I don't know how to stop hating myself. I don't want this, I want it to stop, I want my horrible brain to shut up and stop tormenting me. I'm sick of trying, it never goes anywhere, I'm always the same, a complete loser.
Habitual Failure
Spending money on useless therapy is bothering me. What a crock of [BEEP] it is, I want to tell her that I think it's bullshit and I'm not writing in a fucking moronic gratitude journal, but I'm afraid if I'm REALLY honest I'll start to get angry in the office and lose control. So, I just sit there like an idiot and agree with whatever she says while my mind races and my right eye starts to twitch. Eventually I'm just going to explode, I honestly can't live being this miserable anymore.
I really want to die. I don't know, that was an awful doctors appointment. I should kill myself and have everyone around me free of my bullshit.
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