Random Thought of the Day

[Nyctophilia]

Hi friends! I'm still working on the "surreal videos" Tangent, will post that within the next week

Interesting.

My videos are very surreal but I don't think this is the sort of thing she has in mind lol.

Also lol 'man or bear' is an option in this poll:



But I hope Satanism wins I guess? I wouldn't mind cuckolding if it was part of a video with other stuff included too I guess.

[Nyctophilia]

Imagine being stupid enough to commit domestic violence in the hallway of a hotel room where there are obviously cameras everywhere. Good job he is stupid though I guess so there's blatant evidence.

It really bothered me how much people made Diddy's whole thing about his sexuality and not his power and abuse. Like, who cares if he was "fruity"? This man abused several women and several men, with a lot of old school icons like Fat Joe and Busta Rhymes seemingly in on it but refusing to call him out. This is not about sexuality and it really speaks to a huge amount of biphobia/homophobia still present.

Never even heard that myself. Literally just saw security camera footage of him abusing his girlfriend.

Hip hop and homophobia go hand in hand

Yep. It didn't really start to change until Nicki Minaj and even then I think she's said homophobic things (haven't looked into it much,) but she had an alter ego that was a gay guy lol.

Roman Zolanski (pronounced roh-mun zo-lan-skee or zo-lan-sky) is one of Nicki Minaj's alter egos; he is Minaj's most well-known and utilized alter ego, as well as her self-professed favorite.[1] Zolanski is described as a homosexual male from London, England, characterized as being far more outspoken (and perhaps malicious) than Minaj herself. His first appearance in a song was in "My Chick Bad", a song by Ludacris. Roman was declared dead by Minaj herself on February 14, 2014.[2] However, five months later, Nicki held a Q&A on twitter and said that she will rap as Roman again when a fan asked her. Since then, Roman has made small appearances. A full return of Roman is expected to happen one day, but so far there are no indications of when.

She once collab'd with Jeffree Star too but not talking about that lol.

And regardless of her intent it did make room for a lot of other people like Lil Nas X

Lil Nas X also cites Nicki Minaj, Katy Perry, Drake, Miley Cyrus and Doja Cat as some of his biggest influences.

I mean there's a definite path from Nicki's 2012 Grammy performance:



and Lil Nas X giving Satan a lapdance.



The bar was always pretty low though. In hell if you will xD

Also Ashnikko.



There have been a bunch of [BEEP] women and non-binary people in hip hop though since the 2010s and it's all alternative stuff that isn't really central so doesn't exactly count for this discussion.



I do like a bunch of K.Flays music though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUcAPCxrSQs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oT0vAQo2XUE

Really stretching the genre (then again genre wise I feel like that Lil Nas X track barely counts):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xI2VBjMrqk

Off the top of my head.

It's mostly bisexuals actually for whatever reason lol. (I'm guessing it's partly that a lot of people who were into emo music started making emo rap and trap metal music and this whole thing overlapped with e-girls, e-boys etc. Also that that demographic was like younger people who would have been into emo in the past etc.) Editing this post as I remember more and more bisexual rappers lmfao.

[Nyctophilia]

I'm not saying we're living in a simulation but:

• White people in Louisville are attacking the police

• Diddy's son dropped a diss song about the FBI so they dropped a video of his dad beating his gf

• Drake dropped a diss song accusing Kendrick Lamar of beating his gf

• Kendrick dropped a song accusing Drake of being a colonizing pedophile and party buses here in Nashville have crowds of people singing "A minorrrrrr"

• A kicker for the Super Bowl champs told women that their highest aspiration in life is in the kitchen

• His teammate is dating Taylor fukcing Swift

• A supreme court justice was flying the American flag upside down "stop the steal" style the week after the insurrection

• The mayor of NY had his personal guard pop his neighbor in the back and then arrested the neighbor

• a criminal trial outed multiple journalists/tv show hosts as being in a former president's pocket

• that former president is the one on trial

I think we're stuck in Netflix.

The writers would be told the script doesn’t work, it seems too outrageous.

Lol.

Of course that's not even everything.

Florida man is going to have his work cut out for him soon.

you forgot Hispanic White Supremacist accidentally streams gay porn. Gets called out by disgraced, former member of congress, volleyball star, lawyer, doctor, purple heart recipient George Santos.

A few years ago (during the pandemic I think,) some right wing politician in Hungary was caught sneaking down a drain pipe while trying to escape a gay orgy so they currently have to beat that.

When the right wing homophobic party politician has to break lockdown rules to go to the gay orgy.

And I thought Dominic Cummings was weird (in general.) Remember the time:

'Two hands are a lot' --we’re hiring data scientists, project managers, policy experts, assorted weirdos…

People in SW1 talk a lot about ‘diversity’ but they rarely mean ‘true cognitive diversity’. They are usually babbling about ‘gender identity diversity blah blah’. What SW1 needs is not more drivel about ‘identity’ and ‘diversity’ from Oxbridge humanities graduates but more genuine cognitive diversity.

We need some true wild cards, artists, people who never went to university and fought their way out of an appalling hell hole, weirdos from William Gibson novels like that girl hired by Bigend as a brand ‘diviner’ who feels sick at the sight of Tommy Hilfiger or that Chinese-Cuban free runner from a crime family hired by the KGB. If you want to figure out what characters around Putin might do, or how international criminal gangs might exploit holes in our border security, you don’t want more Oxbridge English graduates who chat about Lacan at dinner parties with TV producers and spread fake news about fake news.

By definition I don’t really know what I’m looking for but I want people around No10 to be on the lookout for such people.

We need to figure out how to use such people better without asking them to conform to the horrors of 'Human Resources' (which also obviously need a bonfire).

Send a max 1 page letter plus CV to ideasfornumber10@ gmail.com and put in the subject line 'job/' and add after the / one of: data, developer, econ, comms, projects, research, policy, misfit.

I’ll have to spend time helping you so don’t apply unless you can commit to at least 2 years.

I’ll bin you within weeks if you don’t fit — don’t complain later because I made it clear now.

Thinking about it now this was probably a missed opportunity for me.

*updates CV with rambling internet post where I talk to myself about lemon memes.*

[Nyctophilia]

I saw my dad yesterday and he was listening to music on YouTube and then in the suggested section Budgie popped up and I was like 'oh it's Budgie they have a song I really like.'

and he was like 'I love Budgie.'

Which I guess shouldn't have been that surprising lol they are of his generation. Though YouTube comments suggest they were underrated.

I was trying to remember the name of this song lol:



I was like 'something about birds.. bird fan'

and he was like 'Bread Fan!'

I have listened to this particular song many times but not always great with names off the top of my head lol.

So then we listened to the song. My dad was talking about the lead singer Burke Shelley and said he sounded like a girl... He didn't seem to mind this. I don't think so though actually he just has a high pitched voice. Though I can't say since it was obvious to me he was a guy the first time I listened + watched that video. As a teenager I thought the lead singer of Coheed and Cambria was a woman just by listening to them so it's quite possible I guess if I listened to that song without seeing him I might have thought that:



I know there is a female vocalist during parts of this song but I mean I thought the whole thing was multiple female singers lol.

Not sure why this singing style is so popular in prog rock lol it's like the opposite of goth rock funny. Probably said this before.

So then my dad said 'a bit like Geddy Lee' (talking about his singing.)

So I was like 'yeah I think that's why the YT algorithm suggested me this video a while back because I was listening to Rush a lot.'

They're both bass players with the same style (at least in the 70s and maybe early 80s) who also sing in a high pitched voice lol.

I decided to not share that I think they were hot then though lol...

Edit: oh my god I forgot this tumblr post:

dad the prog rock men you like are being babygirlified on tumblr

The responses are hilarious too:

#the last thing I tell my father before I am disowned

#my first though was rush because i remember dad watching a concert of them on tv #i should listen to an album by them soon tbh

Omg that's terrifying are we the same person? That isn't even my account wth.

In December 2022 I saw my dad watching a concert and then thought their music sounded good so decided to check out more later on YouTube. Then realised Geddy Lee was hot in the 70s and 80s very annoying in a culture that expects you to not express or feel attraction unless you're gender normative. Because feminising men is hurting them basically

That's not some objective statement it's just most men dislike it so it becomes harmful just like most women dislike being sexualised by most men so it becomes harmful subjectively. This has become a significant chunk of the culture war 'men are being emasculated' vs 'men are creepy and objectifying women.' I just don't know if the men realise that there's any sexual appeal to their emasculation seemingly not. Of course there are other motives but the sexual/romantic one is contributing significantly.

Then I became super obnoxious about it (as I usually do.) This is the exact psychological process (minus the feminisation aspect,) haha it's why I liked this tweet thread so much even though I don't find that guy attractive myself:



But if that guy whose twitter page I found the other day is anything to go by denial is probably a happier place for many straight men to be otherwise they just turn into radfem-adjs but replace women with men or incorporate men into the overall belief system. So femininity = bad and everyone is being emasculated seems to become the hypothesis. I think most radfems are either motivated by a fear of losing power and emasculation or an envy over feminine competition because they don't want to or can't compete in that particular hierarchy and instead of accepting that that's not the hierarchy for them, they have to destroy the entire hierarchy. Something like that. Also the fear of cooties is powerful.

This is also imo why you see a lot of trans guys and non-binary people who don't care as much as rad fems about feminine expression. Not the only reason but part of it. Also butch or androgynous lesbian women who are attracted to femininity care less about feminine expression too for obvious reasons.

So I describe radfem beliefs as a kind of masc4masc culture. Well that's just one lens/hypothetical way to view the cultural landscape. It's very hard to know what the [BEEP] is going on because everything really is complete chaos.

This guy is the same but with added evo-psych/genetic explanations thrown in and I think he considers himself to be far right and doesn't like terfs - he mentioned that in one tweet (I mean when I compare him to radfems there are of course many differences in belief but the core anxiety appears to be the same is what I mean):

These power notions are symptom of the uniquely western and recent coups where juvie male humans have ousted adult males [and all the traditions therein] leaving us with a model of the passive male. [...]

If this modern western human circumstance persists, fems who like gracile males will start to out breed other fem variants and handicap systems (fem vs fem indirect competition as paramount) will start to set in.

Femininity is foisted on fems thru the older members of the population (males) emasculating them.

If that doesn't happen, fems just keep growing.

If fems also have eggs [will if OBLIGATE dimorphic] they will still be pursued -- even if that means the winner male gets eaten.

*Ergo either the male will emasculate the female OR hyena-dom (or praying mantids) awaits.*

Pre req: vertebrate dimorphic sex is maturity battle 'tween hermaphrodites. If males domesticate/puppy-ify themselves -- ie. juvies win coups-- fems are the biggest she-wolves left.

Human homosexuality, along with trans and male subs, is the effect of being stunted by various *oppressions* N dysgenia. [...]

If I throw billions of fish over 10 gens on a beach I could very well select for variants that could hack it better (and so on and so on).

BUT that doesn't address whether I am an ABuser of fish while it happens.

The latest left is simply the recent page turn of the long, long book of coup where juvies oust the silverbacks. THAT is what selected us down neoteny and hive of specialists ("pervs"). ...The human way.

Absolutely correct.

The notion that females volunteer to be female is romantic fiction.

It's not so great since he sounds genocidal. I won't quote the tweets where he specifically is but he seems far right and obsessed with IQ which he associates with being far right - conviniently - but also seems to want to remove reproductive competition by reducing all Humans to the same reproductive phenotype.

Also this shouldn't matter but a lot of research suggests trans and homosexual people have a higher than average IQ. So his whole theory about how IQ is distributed is wrong in the first place. This was especially true of trans people attracted to the opposite natal sex in one study where it was like 120+ average in one paper from the mid 2000s (both trans men and trans women.)

And he fears that there's no reason after artificial wombs to keep around feminine people basically. Edit: he's not pushing that idea I think, I think that's his fear ultimately.

Which suggests he's just incapable of having any kind of general appreciation for femininity or protective instinct for others and is projecting that (I mean why keep around any Humans? I don't know because they are intrinsically valuable? Not to resort to Christian sentiments *puke* but it's instinctual for the non psychopathic. People generally only start to devalue people's lives when they are extreme outgroup and/or threatning other's lives. It's hard to maintain empathy eg: for killers.) Which is why I brought that up before. You know like this.. I'm trying to find a quick example of what I'm talking about lol. Well there's that 'meme' thing where people are like:

"we must protect this man at all costs."

That's one example.

So Shoe doesn't even want to [BEEP] feminine men (I think,) she's bisexual but into dimorphism (I kind of got that from her Pokemon smash or pass video LOL,) and her husband is like a fairly average guy not a femboy. Not super masc either though. She likes dad types I guess. Still doing this though:





She's adopted many conservative beliefs too but it's instinctive I think. I will be observing in the future though. Lol conservative guys reckon if you marry a conservative guy you pretty much just morph into a conservative 100% so I am curious if conservative women who don't (as a rule) defend feminine men (like Abby Shapiro,) are insinctively different from women who convert to conservative beliefs or. Like does it seem to be social or not?

Again she's also bisexual (maybe that's related to certain personality traits + instincts?):



So is the sexuality more important than the politics? I actually assume at some point she'll stop making content though lol. As sane people who have families do lol until their kids are grown up and they become JK Rowling. (Or at least teenagers, I think JK Rowling's youngest was a teenager when she started discoursing looking now.) The neuroticism always has to go somewhere right? Same with Jordan Peterson.

Ftr someone on reddit recently posted about how their progressive dad who was supportive of LGBT+ people, women, etc fell down some kind of right wing conspiracy hole because of his friends + internet algos so pretty much changed most of his beliefs and values in a short space of time and so I think right wing guys who think it's just a female thing are full of [BEEP] haha.

But it's refreshing that the guy on twitter acknowleged it instead of just ignoring the preference. It just seems so obvious to me given the amount of influence Tumblr and related cultures have and the sexual preferences of the people on the website and in these subcultures. Most conservatives genuinely seem ignorant of the fact that there is a market being catered to. I don't know.

Do I think a more ideal scenario is a bunch of male radfems running around freaking out about how artificial wombs will stop them from existing unless they emasculate all females? It's not all that much different from the current way these people act and they're likely to get more hysterical about it.

What a time to be alive.

#dad? they babygirlified geddy lee?

Also amusing is that I think the age range of people posting in these tags can be as young as 16 but varies a bunch mostly early-mid 20s (I'm 33 which is geriatric for tumblr users who aren't Neil Gaiman or some famous musician or other. I mean of people who actually post their age in their bio which I guess lots don't. I know some people I followed on livejournal years ago in The Sims community are on Tumblr now though and they were in their 30s when I was a teenager.) Yet everyone's dad's still listen to prog rock and 70s rock/metal music?

and we listened to this other song that was pretty good:



My dad said he wanted to go see them live and was looking into that at one point in the early 2010s because apparently they were still playing around then but yeah I pointed out the lead singer was dead. I actually thought I read that he died somewhere between 2014 and 2019 but looking now it was 2022 so not that long ago at all. Also it looks like their last tour was in 2010 anyway so possibly it was too late whenever he was looking anyway. Half the concerts on that tour also got cancelled because the lead singer was hospitalised.

He also talked about this band called the Pink Faries who apparently did free concerts all over the place and he said they might have done some in Camden Town which sounds cool. I was thinking about the woman who was harassed for playing the harp. I'm sure that sort of thing happened back then too though. Then again if they weren't accepting donations people were probably slightly less annoyed. Some people really (as I said,) hate the idea of creative people getting paid.

I guess this was part of the free festival movement? Maybe he was talking about that.

Pink Fairies are an English proto punk rock band initially active in the London (Ladbroke Grove) underground and psychedelic scene of the early 1970s. They promoted free music, drug use, and anarchy, and often performed impromptu gigs and other stunts, such as playing for nothing outside the gates at the Bath and Isle of Wight pop festivals in 1970, as well as appearing at Phun City, the first Glastonbury and many other free festivals including Windsor and Trentishoe.

Mm.

Something similar happened in the 90s for a bit with raves 'free parties.' Including in Luton there's a pretty interesting story about that I was looking into a while ago but I posted about that before. With the Exodus Collective:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exodus_Collective

Bedfordshire County Council voted unanimously in 1995 to support of a public inquiry into the alleged police harassment of Exodus, to be chaired by Michael Mansfield. The inquiry was then stalled by the Home Office.[2][5] MixMag profiled the collective in 1996, writing: "Exodus is more than just a free party sound system ? it's a housing co-op, a city farm, a ray of light in the concrete no-man's land of Luton. They've survived four police operations against them and are currently battling a murder charge, an arson attack and a tractor assault on their rave lorry. This isn't just about dancing, it's about an alternative way of life".[6][7] The murder charge was later dropped. In an uncommon sequence of events, the trial was first brought forward six months and then the presiding judge (Maurice Drake) agreed to step aside since he was a Freemason and the Exodus collective had for years come into conflict with masons.[8][9]

Investigating that sent me down a crazy rabbit hole before lol.

I was trying to find videos from Camden because that was an important place to me growing up but I can't. A while back I found some footage of King Crimson playing in Hyde Park which is probably related too:

The Stones in the Park was a free outdoor festival held in Hyde Park on 5 July 1969, headlined by the Rolling Stones and featuring Third Ear Band, King Crimson, Screw, Alexis Korner's New Church, Family and the Battered Ornaments, in front of an estimated audience between 250,000 and 500,000 spectators.

So the police kind of ruined that sort of thing later on. And now if you want to see a modern day prog rock/metal band like say Tool you have to pay 100+ pounds for tickets (of course this is true of any band or artist who is famous enough and does large enough concerts but Tool is touring atm so on my mind.) I mean there are bands who you can get cheaper tickets for but at the scale of success + concert size yeah. That's why it's important to find bands early I guess.

However I doubt a donation model is sustainable always and a lot of these musicians back in the day had other sources of financial support (though it does seem to work out OK for some YouTubers for instance, and some buskers) and honestly it's not like every band is going to be able to afford to tour now anyway (so I can't say the current system is working,) if they don't have enough fans and even rather large artists are having some time funding stuff like one British artist apparently can't go to the US for this reason and I thought she was reasonably big so yeah insane.

Recently, a tweet by Little Simz set Twitter on fire after she canceled her US tour this year because it was financially unsustainable. While many supported the British rapper, others questioned why such a successful rapper cannot make the tour happen.

One problem with not having a donation model and doing concerts in random places is that fans don't know this happens:

The indie-rock band Wednesday tweeted the costs associated with their SXSW stint. The band played seven shows, but only got paid for one. At the end of the SXSW tour, the band spent $2,182.39 and earned $2,084, leaving them with a loss.

???

I'm in a band. Getting gigs is easy. Getting paid? Not so easy.

Got screwed out of so much money by a pay to play venue. If I sell your tickets I damn well better get paid. Crocodile rock in Allentown can [BEEP] themselves, we brought friends along so we had more people than the headliner and we still got nothing

Did you sell ALL of their tickets? Because whenever a P2P venue/show tried to screw my band, we just refused to leave until we were paid the agreed amount (provided we sold all the tickets, which we always did, though multiple times I bought multiple tickets to my own shows just so we would get paid). We always warned the other bands at venues that tried not to pay us, too, so they knew not to play there.

P2P shows aren't even the worst. The worst is when the headlining band is in charge of paying the other bands, and tries to run with the money. [BEEP] you, The Elegance of Rot, [BEEP] you.

Honestly I don't remember, it was our first and 2nd shows and that was 3 years ago. I know we sold a lot of them but I don't remember how many exactly. But we were still entitled to something, so [BEEP] the croc rock

This one gig we did, we opened up for this old school New York death thrash band prime evil, and we had a blast doing it. We all had fun and we got to chat with all the other bands, it was a great night. Then when it came time to pay, no one knew who we were supposed to get the money from. We talked to the promoter, the owner, prime evil, and we got no where. I don't want to complain because it was the best show I ever played, but we ended up going home with nothing

I believe I've seen Crywank talk about this too.

I don't know if this also happens to bigger bands working with record labels etc (being indie is very difficult with managing all this sort of stuff,) but obviously a lot of venues just want people to play music and then not pay even when they're supposed to be paying.

I'm guessing they can get some money from merch sales where applicable.

"Why do so many artists and creative people hate capitalism?"

A real mystery.



"The conservatives really have a problem with this in particular because conservatives tend not to be that creative by temprement and it's a mystery to me because they should be concerned with economic development and beauty is so unbelievably crucial to economic development."

"One of the things that's really interesting about the university of Toronto is one side of the campus is beautiful, medieval cathedral and the other half is god awful factory and the thing is the attitude towards knowledge has paralleled that architectural transformation. At one point the humanities was a sacred endeavour, and so was being educated in the university and that's turned into mass factory and that's reflected in the architecture."

There's a school near here that has a brick tower that I felt reminded me of a concentration camp tower (well a chimney for a specific purpose.) I pointed this out to my brother while we were walking past it recently. It also reminds me of the Tate Modern same vibe with the tower. I've also compared that to a concentration camp tower. It's ominous to look at. It was a power station though.

However factory works too. Probably less dramatic lol. (I have visited a concentration camp before and the vibes were bad and worse. edit: I mean a former concentration camp in Germany.) I find it interesting though and I think it's making a statement much like brutalism is. The architecture might effect how people think but it's also downstream of how people think and the culture.

Also. Having those two sections next to each other also sounds interesting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxGPe1jD-qY

"There's a lot of people who are blind to beauty. It's actually one of the things funnily enough- it distinguishes conservatives and liberals roughly speaking. Liberal people tend to be high in openness but they're not very conscientious they're not particuarly dutiful, they're not particularly orderly, they're not particuarly industrious. Not compared to conservatives."

"You are an open late teen and you have conservative parents and you say mum, dad I think I've decided that I'm going to be an artist. That's a complicated discussion isn't it?"

"Yes it's like discussing colour with someone who is colour blind and I mean that. It's actually a perverse thing about conservatives in some sense. The data on the economic utility of artists is really strong. I mean artists and entrepreneurs are the same people and of course entrepreneurs are the people who provide all of the vision for the entire capitalist system but conservatives tend to be so blind to art that they can't even see that the artists are the people who drive the economy forward."

"If you want something that's already been invented, implemented, and then turned into a machine you don't get someone creative to do that. They're off to do the next thing. They're not even interested in that. You'll bore them to death."

"The problem with being creative is that you're useless at the bottom of the dominance hierarchy because at the bottom of the dominance hierarchy you should do what you're told to do. You're not there to think outside the box. You're there to learn what you're supposed to do and implement it and creative people that's that isn't what they do."

"It's very hard to be an artist and survive over any reasonable period of time."

Someone he's talking to: "What's wrong with our social structure. Well first of all are creative people common? Are there a lot of them? Is this a problem we need to solve? To find a way to integrate them and I don't want to say exploit them but exploit their creativity for the greater good. We don't seem to be very good at that. We've marginilised them. There's no minimum wage for visual artists for example."

"We do an abysmal job of it."

"Can we fix this?"

"Well the correlation between grades and creativity is 0. [..] Educational institutions do a great job especially before the university level of just crushing creative people because the education system was actually set up in the late 1900s to train the children of workers to be obediant workers."

"You don't produce creative people in factories. You produe factory workers in factories. And that's fine except there aren't any factories anymore so we should probably stop doing it."

"The thing about being creative isn't just that you have to be creative you have to be more creative than everyone else. And good luck with that especially in an era where creativity is distributed unbelivably widely on platforms like the internet."

He says that but I feel like if I existed in most other times I would have made 0 money instead of making a small amount from YouTube. I also managed to sell some stuff with my designs on zazzle but I didn't actually end up getting any of that money for reasons I went into before. The tl;dr though is [BEEP] Zazzle.

"Think about Stephen King he's a really great example. Half the money in the publishing buisness goes to Stephen King."

"So creative people are getting a really rough- they're not getting a break at all and there are probably more creative people doing non creative work in the work force then the other way around?"

"Oh definitely, definitely. And the thing is I don't want to paint too dismal a picture about being creative. Because one of the things that pays off is you get to be creative. There's great aesthetic joy in that and depth."

"Well schools do that all the time. Stop daydreaming and pay attention to your work. Well what if my work is daydreaming? Well then we're going to punish you because you're going to be a good worker in a factory."

"So where are the creative people in our society we know that they're artists."

"Creative people are overrepresented among people who you might regard as failures over the life course and radically overepresented among people who you would view as succesful. And that's the high risk, high return gambling strategy. Any managerial, administrative position is generally very low creative. Writers, artists, movie makers, literary people."

"Back when the impressionists first showed up there were riots when their art was hung because the idea of percieving that way was so radical that it caused people to have emotional fits and so artists teach people to see and I mean that literally."

I was trying to find the video where he says this quote or something like it:

"I don't know why they don't fund the god damn artists." - Jordan Peterson.

Lol found it finally.

"It's the thing that mediates the relationship between order and chaos so it's half chaos. That's why it's not comprehensible and artists play exactly the same role in society. [...] They're the civilising agents. I mean look at Europe and this is one of the things that really bothers me about the fact that conservative people have a hard time properly valuing art economically. It's so paradoxical because conservatives are vrey concerned about economics. It's like OK fine then why don't you fund the damn artists because Europe is so beautiful it's just heart breaking when you go there."

Probably the only thing we agree on lol.

"People are terrified of colour. They paint their walls beige. They're terrified of art they buy some mass produced thing because they don't want anyone laughing at them for their lack of taste and they would get laughed at because they have no taste."

Beige mums fit into this too lol:



"It's a toy. Not a bomb threat. Why does it need to be neutralised?"

Just a perfect illustration of this lmfao.

Also this video is hilarious.

"OK that's just homophobic you replaced the adorable rainbow toy with what looks like a disassembled dentist chair."

but yeah removing the colours in this case actually changes the entire purpose of the object to nothing. A boring group of shapes that are all the same shape not even different shapes because they're all arches. You are now learning half as much.

And it is at that point that I figure at least some of these mums are just doing this (because it wouldn't be the first time on tiktok from what I've seen):



Oh I know there are research papers about distraction and learning with mixed results etc. I looked into it before after watching this video but just the language used and how spartan the extremes of this subcultural movement is fits in very well with an uncreative worldview.

Lol:



I've not been to Canada but he has a very low opinion of it aesthetically.

[Heelsbythebridge]

It is hot as balls here. Hot. As. Balls.

[Nyctophilia]

Uh yeah I hate this kind of thing.

Like Far from the Madding Crowd. This soldier guy is giving me the creeps. The other guy is insane/posessive. Obviously a bunch of men are unstable and jealous but it's not entertainment for me. Just to get to the end. Also after further investigation (as I hadn't read the book,) the 2015 film cut a bunch of stuff so it was even worse/more nonsensical.

I say this as someone who has often enjoyed characters being jealous in fictional contexts either female or male characters but there are specific ways to write that I guess and this story isn't going for that in the first place it's portaying an abusive relationship.

I - sorry... I ...
Did they make a romcom//romantic-esque movie out of something that usually you'd see in an FBI or Criminal Minds episode...?

I feel like it's not really supposed to be a romance or the romance is secondary. I know it says 'romance' but it sounds like some kind of drama. I looked up the book the film is based on and apparently it's based on the writer's parent's relationship too. I feel like that's a very millenial thing to do lol (although she's slightly older born in '79.) Seeing as many of us are traumatised in one way or another by our parent's relationships.

Some of the details having read the plot (since I know I'm not going to watch/read it,) annoy me even more.

Spoiler: Abort his child

I just wanna talk, Ryle.

Exactly lol.

Especially my mood right now and various stuff I've been reading recently.



LOL suprisingly considering how I engage with social media I never actually do this. I barely get around to watching stuff I actually like the sound of lol let alone this sort of thing. Sitting and watching an entire film is too much for my attention span most days. If I see it at the cinema it's easier.

I still haven't even seen 50 shades of Grey though I feel like I know most of the details from reading bits and pieces online over the years.

It Ends with Us was the worst book I have ever read. I will be hate watching this, though.

Didn't you see the meme? Someone spent about 2 minutes making that for the quote retweets.

College graduate Lily Bloom moves to Boston with hopes of opening her own floral shop. She has recently given a eulogy at her father's funeral in her hometown of Plethora, Maine. Her father abused her mother, who kept the abuse a secret, leading Lily to resent both of them.

Lol I invent like entire towns worth of people in my mind from time to time (with some overlapping characters,) because I've played too much Sims in my life, and I have this lesbian couple (both aged 38,) who live on this small island next to a larger island where one runs a flower shop (on the larger island,) with her best friend. The other woman works as a nurse and plays football (soccer,) on this local team and they have a 6 year old daughter.

The friend is a 'native American' though not really because they live in a Sims like world and is married with a few kids.

This is also reminding me of Monsieur Venus because the male character who is feminised was a florist before. That's a very dark book and it doesn't end well for him. Flower shops and flower themes in general are also common in shoujo manga.

can i remind yall that the main character writes letters to ellen degeneres

Wtf is this book/film lol?

I want everyone to know that a lot of the story is told through the protagonist's young diary entries. And every entry opens with "Dear Ellen" because she loves Ellen Degeneres so much

Oh I see I did that with Green Day for a few months when I was 14.

I get that Ryle is kind of Spoiler: supposed to be a villain (even though people on twitter describe it like a love triangle that's not what I'm getting from wikipedia,) but even reading the wikipedia pages for that book and it's sequel are really annoying me to the point of wanting to write myself into the book.

Read the plot on Wikipedia this is kinda the worst book of all time

It's what I was doing.

Literally this is heterosexual culture.

I guess it must be. Somehow I never even knew this whole thing existed. I lost touch with it sometime around the end of the Twilight era. I mean I knew about 50 shades too of course but didn't read or watch it.

At this stage all I know is man vs bear.

A gigantic moth has flown into my room. Whyyy? It's not even the right time of day quite yet.

People keep quote retweeting this with Taylor Swift's song set to various ships they like or something lol.

you will never be caskett my tears ricochet edit

you will never be mattelektra my tears ricochet edit

stydia my tears ricochet edit cleared this sorry

Sony you?ll not come even close to this masterpiece

you will never be midgelenny my tears ricochet edit

Are they bots? Maybe.

i especially loved the sexualization of ryle appealing to the young girl audience whose going to lust after him and condone his actions and miss the abuse message this book claims to promote ♥️

If they do anything will probably be gay (slash) fanfiction lol, but I don't know what demographic this appealed to in the first place.

Let's see what's happening on ao3 already.. *searches*

8 Works in It Ends With Us - Colleen Hoover

Very not popular.

Lily Bloom likes the taste of revenge more than she likes being married.

Basically I hate Ryle and I hate how the book ended so I wrote Lily getting some revenge on Ryle and then leaving him for good instead of Spoiler: having a child with him or allowing him to stay in her life


[tagged with violence etc]

So proud of you guys.

We do of course also have the obligatory gay fanfic I mentioned among the 8 fanfics:

It's been three years since Lily Blossom Bloom started dating Atlas Corrigan.

Two years since they broke up.

Now, in the wake of the absence in his life now that Lily's no longer in it, Atlas can't help but commiserate with Ryle Kincaid, the brilliant neurosurgeon who happens to be Lily's ex-husband. And the father of her baby.
Their friendship deepens over time until finally, Atlas can't take it anymore and confesses these new and strange feelings that he's been developing to Ryle.

I'm sorry her middle name is Blossom?

I don't ship it.

[Nyctophilia]

Meanwhile in the UK:

Jeremy Clarkson has been named the UK's sexiest man alive for the second year in a row.

I think not.

Someone posted 90s or at least 2000s Damon Albarn in response so this counts.

#ugh his hair

Just presently. But another guy who I'd rate highly hasn't lived in the UK since like the mid 2000s and obviously my current number one famous fixation (young Geddy Lee,) is Canadian so he's disqualified by default.

Clarkson's not even the hottest guy on Top Gear though imo (before even getting into the topic of the entire UK.) Lol someone actually posted a tiktok fancam thing of Richard Hammond:

I think Hammond is sexier tbh.

valid, i wrote smut about him when i was like 16

Like not counting bugs bunny/clark gable (they count as a single entity) I think Richard Hammond really was my first crush

OK I need to know. What is it about Bugs Bunny? I've seen one too many people post about this now.

OK there was obviously a scene in Wayne's World I forgot about where a character brings up Bugs Bunny in a dress and that's all that comes up if I search lol. But that's not the thing.

Why weren't conservatives outraged over years of bugs bunny dressing in drag and kissing men, but are suddenly outraged by modern media depicting such things?

You have touched on some interesting points that are hard for our contemporary culture to apprehend correctly.

The idea of men dressing in drag or behaving in "feminine" ways has been considered funny in many societies throughout history. But it has nothing to do with today's gender ideology or with "challenging gender norms"--quite the opposite, in fact.

[...]

With males it’s different. Masculine identity doesn’t just unfold; it must be actively earned. Men must become men and prove they are men by various tests and tasks, which differ from culture to culture but which share the idea of submitting young males to stress situations--some of them very extreme.

There must always be a risk of failure. Anxiety about failing is reflected in jokes and stories about men who fail to become men, or who show feminine characteristics. Male insecurity is biologically based; it’s rooted in the reality that males are designed by biology and evolution to be "expendable." Individual males can be sacrificed for the good of the group.

Like Bugs Bunny, trickster figures in traditional cultures often exhibit "gender-blurring" behavior; some can seemingly switch sexes.

Tricksters like Bugs exist outside social norms. The important point is that they are never models of behavior, at least not in oral societies and probably not today either. Instead, they are negative exemplars. In Norse mythology, the trickster Loki is called “the doer of good and the doer of evil.” He is powerful, but definitely not a role model.

Tricksters teach oppositely by holding up examples of what NOT to do so they can be ridiculed and laughed at. Tricksters flout all kinds of social norms; they can exhibit cowardice, cheat in games, run away instead of fighting, lie or steal. They are symbols of the instability of masculine identity. All of this is funny (to males, at least), because humor reflects and temporarily exorcizes anxiety. Youngsters hearing the stories are supposed to laugh at the tricksters, not emulate them. Laughing at trickster figures who change sexes relieves anxiety about male insecurity. Social norms were actually reinforced by encouraging laughter at deviant* behavior. No one ever argued that seeing Bugs Bunny put on a grass skirt or smooching Elmer Fudd--or seeing Milton Berle in drag, for that matter--made any kid want to emulate either of them "seriously."

(*I’m not using "deviant" as a pejorative here, but literally to mean behavior that deviates or swerves from a social norm.)

Post-Romantic Western scholars too often see oral trickster figures as romantic "rebels" to be identified with instead of understanding them correctly as negative examples whose function is to preserve and uphold social norms of behavior by demonstrating what NOT to do and being ridiculous in the process.

Thanks you did a good job of explaining why Bugs Bunny is attractive to women and bisexual people (or at least a proto kid version of the same thing.) I watched him in cartoons a bit as a kid but never really thought about it. It's like MCU Loki though who is also seen as attractive to women as a teen + adult form of the same thing. Or I guess a lot of rock stars really.

I think lots of girls and women identify with these characters and/or see them as romantic/sexual targets. They're also written in a way that is more and more sympathetic as time goes on and depending on culture. Like consider Team Rocket lots of people watching Pokemon as kids identified with them in the TV show. In the games they're just a criminal organisation that's pretty dark and treated more seriously. Even though I mean the whole work is pretty dark you're making pseudo-animals fight each other for sport lol.



Their dramatic flamboyant incompetence is what makes them endearing I guess. A bit like cats and they run around with a literal cat Pokemon lol.

"How come your dressed up like pirates!?"

"Because. Because."

Lol.

I was more into the gym leaders though I always wanted to be one. I liked dragon Pokemon a lot also psychic and dark. I also liked fire Pokemon though and I liked the character Sabrina. This is probably the funniest moment from Pokemon that's in my head though:

Today's gender ideology treats humor itself--virtually all humor--as "aggression". It insists that everyone take all "play-fighting" seriously. This is the single most consistent and reliable marker of its rejection of masculinity and masculine identity.

This is often true but I also think there's a difference between play fighting and the conservative poltical movement that wants to culturally repress LGBT+ people so I think you should be honest about that.

For more on this complicated and under-studied topic, read Walter Ong's Fighting for Life: Contest, Sexuality and Consciousness.

I'm not buying someone's book lol.

Also tbh there might have been someone freaking out about Bugs Bunny at some point. They did freak out about Batman and various comic book characters in the 1950s after all.

In the 1954 Seduction of the Innocent, psychiatrist Fredric Wertham claimed, "the Batman type of story may stimulate children to homosexual fantasies, of the nature of which they may be unconscious" and "only someone ignorant of the fundamentals of psychiatry and of the psychopathology of sex can fail to realize a subtle atmosphere of homoeroticism which pervades the adventures of the mature 'Batman' and his young friend Robin".[3]

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29694275/

Fredric Wertham’s commentary on the character in his 1954 anti-comics polemic Seduction of the Innocent. For instance, he reserved the term "lesbian" for Wonder Woman, along with the less well-remembered Black Cat. He described the stories featuring these characters as “the Lesbian counterpart of Batman," in part because these characters are portrayed as strong women who, he believed, used violence as an expression of their "extremely sadistic hatred of all males" (193)

Amusingly I was into Poison Ivy and not any of the characters they were concerned about. (Well I haven't read his book so maybe he was concerned about that character too but I've not seen it brought up anywhere.) Now she's canonically bisexual. There's also this idea that if you make a character a villain kids will automatically see them as bad and distance themselves but no.. No lol.

The Lavender Scare was a moral panic about homosexual people in the United States government which led to their mass dismissal from government service during the mid-20th century. It contributed to and paralleled the anti-communist campaign which is known as McCarthyism and the Second Red Scare.[1] Gay men and lesbians were said to be national security risks and communist sympathizers, which led to the call to remove them from state employment.[2] It was thought that gay people were more susceptible to being manipulated, which could pose a threat to the country.[3] Lesbians were at less risk of persecution than gay men, but some lesbians were interrogated or lost their jobs.

The language of the Lavender Scare was purposely vague as instead of being referred to directly, homosexuals and perverts were often called "moral weaklings," "sexual misfits," "moral risks," "misfits," "undesirables," or persons with "unusual morals." The euphemistic term "security risk" was thought by many people at the time and many historians since assumed to be simply a lesser version of a Communist— someone with Communist sympathies but no outright party connections[12][page needed] "Loyalty risk" and "security risk" were considered very similar or essentially different terminology for the same thing. But 'when defining the difference between a loyalty risk and a security risk, government officials typically explained that "loyalty" involved a current state of mind, a wilful desire to betray secrets, while "security" involved behaviours or associations that might lead one inadvertently or unwillingly to betray secrets in the future.[12][page needed] Thus, the government and state department gave themselves the ability to expel government officials without any evidence of them being a communist, but by purely the risk they might be due to inadvertent tendencies and possibilities.

Very little has changed. The language was likely vague because what annoyed and continues to annoy them is vague and not just limited to homosexual people.

can the UK keep producing men like they used to because there's been a clear downgrade

[Damon Albarn]

Musicians are always more attractive so it's not really fair but Clarkson is in general a dick and also

2 years in a row?

I see:

Illicit Encounters is the UK's leading website for married people wanting to have an affair. Marriages are happier as a result of affairs.

That truly does represent the whole of the UK. /s

I'm blaming you for the fact that more guys don't have long hair.

I mean I also don't really leave my house and when I do don't really notice anyone enough to know if anyone does but let's assume hot slim guys with long hair aren't in my area because I feel like I'd notice someone eventually.

I very rarely notice anyone or if I do I just forget.

So the other day I went on a long walk with my brother and saw a guy who had long hair and a beard and wasn't really into him but maybe if I squint.

Then there was a woman with some cool looking trousers (kind of stripy in different colours.) I thought about complimenting her on her trousers but then thought LOL that would involve actually initiating a conversation.

So I was walking with my brother and I pointed that out and he was like 'yes I was going to say she's one of your people.' Which is like some joke thing whenever he sees anyone who looks vaguely uh 'hippyish' I guess or some area that's like newage stuff. Although really my style leans more goth-adj or something else entirely when I bother to put in effort and is like casual band t-shirts + jeans most of the time these days since I don't.

She ended up walking behind us for a while up this one long road.

I saw a church with a slide on the side of it (no it was a skylight but looked kind of like one lol from a distance with the tree blocking it you could sort of imagine.) Clearly it's a slide though you just head up to the roof and then slide down. Like some kind of weird dream/liminal thing. Wanted to try and find an image of something similar but can't.

And then I had a daydream where I started a conversation with her and it turned out we had similar music interests and then we got into a relationship. Not because I found her attractive just because that's what happens when deep down you're lonely/bored and guys with long hair stop existing. And she did have cool trousers so you know.

The fantasy relationship didn't go well in the end I started to imagine how I am + past relationships + avoidance/anxiety issues + struggling to connect etc.

I can't really remember what she looked like now she had long dark brown hair. She was walking at a distance behind so I didn't see her close up. I think she might have had glasses.

I also saw this dead hedgehog by the side the road which was a bit sad and then walked to this village where there was a notice about headghogs because there aren't many of them around now and like tips for things you can do to help them in your garden etc.

When walking down this hill to the village all the sound suddenly disappeared from the town. It was kind of amazing like going through a loading screen in a video game.

And I saw a black squirrel but that's kind of less impressive than the red ones though a bit less common where I live (the black ones are the same species as the grey ones I believe, but different colour.)

[Nyctophilia]

Why r/Bisexualmen is so transphobic?

literally like once a week smh & when u point out that that's just liking women & that they're straight you get downvoted

there's also the constant pleas for reassurance that they're not gay/bi for being attracted to feminine men &or trans men so it's just a real cluster [BEEP] over there. you can block & mute the reddit so you never have to see it, if you want.

This doesn't always apply but if someone were to create a list of 5 bisexual stereotypes that would be one of them without question.

Also reminds me of this (not sure who posted it originally now I couldn't find the post I found a while ago but found someone linked this on reddit on r/bisexual of course lol..):



This is bisexual-adj posting too while I scroll through my tumblr likes to find the above thing:

My husband, after taking a photo of me in a sexy outfit which he has specifically told me is sexy: If I told people this was Geddy Lee, they'd believe me

#shit my husband says #geddy lee #70's geddy apparently #thanks??

Lol kept getting distracted trying to find that post because my tumblr likes are hilarious:



I'm just reading the bit about pikachu in this exact tone of voice lol in my head:



'Pikachu is drowning' :|

the idea that your friends won't like you if you're too weird is wrong for example one time I told a friend whenever I was losing my mind I laid down on the floor under my desk and stared at it until I was better and next time she visited me she taped a bag of salami snacks to the underside of my desk with a message saying "going insane all by yourself, handsome?" which I only saw months later when I had a breakdown. that's friendship.

I should create a #feelgood tag thing for my tumblr reblogs at some point.

Curious about that subreddit now too..

Why are not trans men ever mentioned? I have seen many posts of people talking about their attraction. they usually mention men, women and trans women.

So my question is, are trans men included in men? If so why, why seperate trans women from cis women?

Or are ppl just ignorant to the existence of trans men?

Trans men actually heavily influenced my bi awakening: I considered myself gay, I thought trans men were hot, I started questioning my attractions, and realized I didn't care what was in a person?s pants.

But that's kinda the opposite of how most bi guys arrive in the camp, and I think that's probably why trans women get mentioned more.

I think straight guys tend to be the other way around yeah but then straight women often become attracted to trans men and then question their sexuality.

There's also people who think having a preference for 'twinks' and feminine guys makes you a lesbian or straight but I don't agree.

I can't speak for others and I have been called transphobic for this in the other bisexual group, but I prefer trans men to trans women. My most recent ex is a trans man.

I also feel like people fetishize trans women over trans men.

I've never met a trans guy irl (afaik) and there are also less trans guys on eg: YouTube ime and to some extent social media generally posting photos and although I'm aware of several most aren't my type since I like certain traits including long hair. So it's definitely been rarer that I see a trans guy I find attractive. I thought Korviday was kind of attractive but he's also non-binary (I mean he's non-binary and a trans guy or made a video about that years ago,) and also hasn't uploaded anything in years now.

Oh I just found an unofficial clips channel lol. I didn't watch his twitch. He talks about having long hair :')



He is very political though and I think I'd piss him off lol so it effects my feelings there the hypothetical awareness but physically I find him fairly attractive and also his voice attractive.

Binary trans guys I don't know off the top of my head. Potentially none. Cause like they're well hidden in the UK and I can only think of 6 maybe 7 (it was ambiguous,) trans guys off the top of my head who aren't non-binary or genderfluid or something as well and famous or on social media. That's basically nobody lol.

I dunno that subreddit doesn't seem that bad maybe they changed some rules since that thread I stumbled on since it's been a few months. Also I noticed some posts were deleted by mods.

[name] is trying to point out that this subreddit and more generally [BEEP] spaces at large tend to be oppressively phallocentric and hyperfocused on natal penises in specific. It's why trans women are brought up so much. It's why cis men on here say [BEEP] like "I'm into men, women and trans women". I can guarantee you that trans men are not included in the "men" portion for the guys who say [BEEP] like this.

I appreciate the group leaving those bits out of sexualization as literally every other corner of the internet it feels like that is the only way people see trans men, walking vaginas. I hate it, and it's a nice repreave from the onslot to just be a dude with a dick for a change. I left nearly every FTM group because of the sexualization of trans men in that way tbh

Okay but like...other trans men are allowed to notice and take issue with the fact that trans men are frequently desexualized nonconsensually in queer/bi/trans spaces and in this space in particular too? That's not treating trans men like "walking vaginas", that's pointing out that trans men are othered into nonexistence because they don't see you as "just a dude with a dick", they see you as a guy without one, and therefore unworthy of sexual desire or sexual expression because it doesn't turn them on as much as the idea of a woman or a man with a natal cock does.

Trans men aren't being treated "just like any cis dudebro" any more than trans women are being treated just like any other cis woman.

-Geisha

Yes that is generally true online and people shouldn't just deny it. Well it's more that people often seem to have an issue with vaginas outside [BEEP] female spaces and also have an issue with men/masculinity. (See below for both those things in a single comment lol. I found this comment in some other discussion recently on a bisexual sub.) So put the two together and there you go.

I do feel like gay guys are like... much more vocal about their physical attraction to other men and seems to really like many of the things that straight women seem either uncomfortable talking about or uncomfortable with period? Same with wlw, like we're rapturous about other women. By comparison straight men and straight women seems sort of cold towards each other? Like attracted and maybe also a little disgusted. I heard so many straight men fucking railing against pussies growing up, it's totally weird that they also... want to have sex with them... when they seem so horrified by them.

I mean I'm bi and frankly this has confused me about my own sexuality. I don't really know how to label it but I do experience the attraction I have for men and women differently. Men's bodies... I'm definitely attracted to on a whole, but it's less aesthetic, it's more cautious, it's a fraught relationship. With women's bodies I don't have the same feelings of fear and I can appreciate their pure beauty more.

It also seems more acceptable even among people who aren't transphobic per se and among trans women sometimes online to say [BEEP] about trans guys coming out who are short etc. I'm really talking about Elliot Page because pretty much everyone was tweeting about that.

I've heard a lot of trans guys don't have difficulty dating men though in spite of the fact that they're not sexualised and this cultural norm persists. Guess it also depends on how picky you are etc and of course how attractive you are in general. It does make it essentially impossible to guess how attractive you'll be after transistioning though. Really going in completely blind.

I know there are a bunch of women who don't care either and there's a study that suggested that people were more willing to date trans guys than trans women which shocked me for the same reasons all these posts exist but there you go.

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs...65407518779139

However, even among those willing to date trans persons, a pattern of masculine privileging and transfeminine exclusion appeared, such that participants were disproportionately willing to date trans men, but not trans women, even if doing so was counter to their self-identified sexual and gender identity (e.g., a lesbian dating a trans man but not a trans woman). The results are discussed within the context of the implications for trans persons seeking romantic relationships and the pervasiveness of cisgenderism and transmisogyny.

And yeah there are a lot of lesbians who are into butch women and trans men so that aspect didn't surprise me. If it applies to other groups that would surprise me. Straight guys definitely seem to be more into trans women. Also this is what they're saying but not necessarily what they'd do.

I think it's because women and femininity are hypersexualised and vocally sexualised online.

But tbf I think there are more people talking about being attracted to trans guys than non-binary people. If I search on that subreddit nothing really comes up lol.

This thread came up which is pretty interesting actually:

I'm a 23 year old bisexual male (known for awhile now), and I've seen other bi men (along with myself) treated poorly by straight women, saying things like "we?ll cheat" or "we have stds." But has anyone else felt like they've been fetishized by bi or pan women?

In discussions about Bi men I've seen bi/pan women talk about them the same way some straight men talk about lesbians/bi/pan women, which kind of feels like they're fetishizing them. I remember one experience of talking with someone who was also Bi, and we were kind of flirting with each other (but nothing too saucy) and when i casually mentioned i was bi, the first thing she says is "So can I peg you?"

Granted I wasn't too bothered by that but I'm hoping I'm not the only one who feels fetishized by those types of women or seen as "one of the good ones" or something.

Yeah I have experienced this. For me it was most obvious with an old non-binary sexual partner who called me a "gender affirming source of dick" which certainly didn't make me feel very nice but the main stuff I've received from [BEEP] women is just the vibe that they want a 'gay best friend' type they can fuck.

I've had plenty of good experiences with trans people, nb people and [BEEP] women that help balance out the bad and one thing I've found helpful is bringing up and calling out when someone says something that makes me uncomfortable. Oftentimes people don't mean it so maybe start off polite but if they push back on it you don't owe them your time or energy.

(I'm totally there with you on the whole "one of the good ones" thing too it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable)

I definitely wouldn't assume that just because a cis guy is bisexual they're going to understand being non-binary. Cis men are probably the least likely to 'get that.' So not sure how it's gender affirming.

Lol I have the opposite end offensive/stereotype view I guess. But I just don't date.

And yeah that's not great to automatically equate the two but I also get that that's something a bunch of people want to do and they are looking for someone gnc and they don't know how to find someone into that type of sex (I don't think a lot of dating sites are really set up well for that kind of thing especially if you're a cis woman,) and tbf in the same thread on r/bisexual where I found that other comment (I think anyway,) I also found this discussion about how 'bi women are probably more into pegging' lol:

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

Bi women are, for starters, much less likely to be biphobic. They're also much more likely to have progressive ideas about gender.

Bi women have been way more willing, collectively speaking, to peg me without citing me for gender-code violations

Pegging is awesome. The first bi lady with a strap I was ever with whispered this in my ear: [...]

HOT

She definitely showed me the way, whispering "did you know that males have 1 X chromosome? Your embryo was a girl before you became a boy, little man. I know my way around your body, Princess."

Omfg! I'd melt.

I sure did. Bi ladies are amazing

This is not something most guys would like including bisexual guys but a bunch of them are bisexual/hang out in bisexual spaces online.

I wish I could be pegged by a collective of bi women 😔

THAT MAKES TWO OF US

So do I because I know how it feels when a man gets inside me. But being heteroflexible with an attraction toward women, I want to be pegged by one.

Based on the typical bottom to top ratio imbalance, I imagine it's a lot more than two of us but not nearly enough bi women to form a collective ☹️

And I thought this lol:

I feel bad for straight women who are into gender nonconformity and like strap on sex etc because people will just assume they don't. (Tbf someone did respond saying the bisexual women they'd been with had a lot of issues mentally and pretty rigid views of gender norms and they had better luck with straight women.)

Also myself because I'm non-binary lol (so technically left out of most conversations by default.)

I mean if someone applied those stereotypes about bi women to me they would be reasonably accurate. I mean I haven't experimented irl but in a fantasy context anyway. I also think they'd apply to a lot of bisexual men who are tops and into feminine guys which is ironic. The general assumption about non-binary afab people is that they're going to be into bottoming which I'm not saying never but I've avoided it pretty intensely despite having two relationships with straight guys, and it doesn't feature in my fantasies.

Lol this is a great point too:

Only in your generation. Finding women like that in older generations is like finding an albino deer. They're out there, but you're unlikely to find them by chance.

This wasn't even a conversation that could or was happening 10 years ago lol so yeah it's interesting in that sense.

This guy actually thinks it's worse being seen as bi than gay and he's married to a guy:

This is why I'm only out as Bi to close family and friends.

I'm a Bi man who married a man so naturally everyone just assumes I'm gay.

I've found that I tend to get a less positive reaction if I told people I'm Bi versus them thinking I'm gay

The rules say no NSFW title but it's to good not to use: I want the D but my wife won't let me!

I (30) and my SO (30f) are together for 6 years and married for two, we had an understanding before our marriage that I could figure out my bi side and I did by having a dat with a guy. I communicated poorly around our agreement so I considered it kind of cheating but she says it isn't. Because of me sneaking around I didn't fully admit to myself how much I liked the experience and said to her that once was enough. Fast forward a few years and I feel the need or craving growing to the point of me being on male dating apps for weeks now. I just deleted them because I love my wife but don't know if I can or should hold myself back... We've talked about an open relationship or including another guy but she says she can't or doesn't want to share me. She also feels that she isn't enough for me, which is kinda true but I want her most yet I am more than that. I always feel like I would let her be with another women if that was something she wanted/needed because I can't give her that but she doesn't understand, fairly simple as she doesn't have those feelings. Now it is not all bad as we experiment with toys, it's something and it feels bad to always put a "but..." at the end of those remarks but... it isn't the real deal.

I really needed to get that of my shoulders, I'm just getting out to my friends and even if I was fully out I don't know if I would talk about these problems with them as they (say they) are not bi.

What am I to do?

Damn I hate attitudes like this. If she's not OK with it it's not acceptable to cheat (cause he basically wants permission for cheating,) get a divorce. You really need to talk about this kind of thing before getting married too. Also her having sex with women is not the same thing. No one wants to talk about this but it's very obvious that most people regardless of sexuality and gender are sexually threatened by and insecure about men rarely women (just look at lesbians talking about bi women many admit they'd care less if their partner left them for another woman,) so I would be really curious to know how he'd feel about her having sex with other men. If he's not OK with that, he shouldn't expect her to be OK with him having sex with men.

I don't know if this has been asked before, but recently I saw on TikTok something along the lines of, "a lesbian struggle is being more scared that your partner will leave you for a man instead of a woman".

Personally I feel this way, and I was surprised to see that a lot of others feel this way too. For some reason I get more wary and jealous of men hitting on my girlfriend rather than women. My girlfriend even agreed even though I'm lesbian and there's no way that's happening.

Why do you guys think this is?

Some poly people manage to overcome this and gay and bi men are more likely to be poly or open than other groups from what I've read but gay guys who can't get many partners are less OK with poly or open relationships and also seems to depend on age with younger gay guys being less OK with that in one thing I read. I definitely don't think she should have to do it though unless you're OK with her having sex with other guys because it's not psychologically equivalent for most people for whatever reason.

How does she feel about opening the marriage and you have guys friends and she has guy friends?

She thinks that it's fair for her also to have dates with other guys, and it is. Not to say that I do find the thought of it hard because I'm not seeking other women. But it depends on which level I'm looking at, if I think "seeing other people" then it's 100% fair she gets the same change, but 'seeing other same sex people" it's not feeling fair because I'm the guy for her. It is a bit of a hypocritical view, I'm aware and easy to say as she doesn't want other women but that's the struggle.

What did I just say? So predictable. 😂

'It's hard because I'm not seeking other women'

That's not why it's hard mate.

'I'm the guy for her'

Yeah well she thought she was the guy for you. Instinctually speaking.

I think the main reason it works for gay and bisexual men is because they both have sex with other men. If one partner doesn't or isn't allowed to by the other I doubt it would work or they'd put up with that. There's also the sex drive + preference for casual sex factor if your wife isn't that interested in that it won't appeal regardless. On top of that sometimes gay men actually are threatened by the idea that a bi guy will leave them for a woman, though it seems less common, and this is the difficulty of dating monosexual people if you're bisexual. If you want to have sex with women or men this will potentially threaten your partners because they can't have sex with those people to try and reduce jealousy. But this also applies even if they are bisexual if they don't really want to have sex with other people of a certain gender and/or you don't have similar sex drives, if one person is getting a lot more sex than the others. All kind of things can lead to resentment.

There was a woman who was talking about how she'd had sex with somewhere around 10 women in her 20s, well she didn't label herself as bisexual in spite of that she said she was 'straight' because she could only see herself settling down with a man but didn't mind hooking up with women. When in relationships with men where she's into them she doesn't have the urge anymore to have sex with women. Not sure how common that is but that's another factor potentially.

Oh god I didn't read to the complete end of his post before so his wife also pegged him or something? 'They used toys.' that's going to make everything I said even worse. I might be projecting a bit but I don't know that I am because they did say she feels like she's not enough and clearly feels insecure about this. Imagine a castrated man and they're fundamentally not enough and their wife has to go and [BEEP] other men that's you right now. Now she's going to have to find heterosexual men to make her feel better which is probably why she brought up other men. I was thinking if he said he's a top she might be more open. But he's clearly not.

I think I'm more aware because I'm non-binary so the idea of viewing everyone as a single gender when it makes sense isn't radical to me. I think it probably is (hopefully) less bad for women but still pretty bad obviously.

[Nyctophilia]

I'm thinking about this a lot and I really think some of the people on this subreddit (and not just this subreddit,) should try and unpack this a bit. Or at least get better at managing things. Because on a large enough scale this combined with the assumption of every male Human who has sex with male Humans being the same causes a lot of issues.

I can't see myself ever being romantically attached to a guy. I'm only orally bi, so I'll suck a dick, but that's the end of things. You can't build a marriage based on BJs. I mean, I love hanging with my friends because men are less work, and I'm at a point where I prefer that situation over the drama of romantic entanglements. But hanging out with your bud or buds is obviously a lot different than marriage.

"Men are less work" being a key example.

I sometimes imagine if our society was designed in such a way that those who want to have kids can settle in for couple of years with a women and have kids, however if you want to leave you move on and find another mate, maybe male or a female or both together to enjoy this beautiful experience we call life.

That is the current arrangement, only most couples don't manage to stay together for the entirity of the child's development. Which it turns out is psychologically damaging for children.

Sexual pleasure is part of the natural world. Due to the taboo + religious dogma we have prostitution, STD's/HIV and other BS.

I don't think stds and HIV have anything to do with religious dogma mate. That's called an unfortunate side effect of nature.

edit: I dunno maybe it's just how he wrote the sentence and he meant that stds on top of dogma etc stop more men from coming out as bi (I think that was the topic of discussion in that thread but I can't remember now.)

Ever wondered why Rome survived for over 1000 years They did not had taboo, so many men in the roman society were bisexual and did had wives that they had kids with but also did had sexual experiences with men. Gymnasium.

Not to be too dramatic but it essentially leads to gay men writing things like this:

Observe how Foucault used phrases like 'interior androgyny' and 'hermaphroditism of the soul'. This makes it apparent that he was in fact referring to that subset of homosexuals who today would usually be described as 'gay bottoms', or perhaps 'true homosexuals'. Let's first spend some time developing a broad, ballpark idea of this 'personage'.

[...] Because some gays are versatile, and others aren't into anal sex at all, the top/bottom- binary might strike readers as unnecessarily rigid, caricatural also, and really a fiction [...] 'Gay bottom' immediately triggers a technical association of receptive anal sex, which in truth is not my main preoccupation, and I invite the reader to actually apply a larger prism that exceeds the technicality of sex positions.

I do feel like he could have summarised all of this by just pointing out obligate homosexuals with a feminine or less masculine temperament but sure OK. So that's essentially what he's talking about when he discusses this (which is important for the rest of what I'm going to quote because some bottoms are masculine bisexuals who don't fall into what he's talking about etc.)

Quite apparently, everybody knows that even perfectly masculine males, who are usually into females, might very well engage in homosexual acts for situational reasons. They might rape another male for motivations of dominance and humiliation or simply because sexual needs are high and no other hole is available. Such men are of course 'tops', but noone would identify them as 'gay'. They are mean brutes and bullies who need booty, and will simply get it elsewhere when females are lacking.

Unlike the gay top, who goes largely unnoticed in the social sphere, the bottom differs significantly from regular straight males. [...] he is the 'classic gay bottom', whose love is always doomed in literary works and classic gay movies. He 'always felt different', doesn't like football or fights, and spent years in the closet almost suffocating before at last bursting out of it. Or perhaps he is still in it?

If this bottom doesn't develop new priorities, skills and insights with age, and finding sex remains his main goal in life, then he is indeed in trouble, painfully aware that he is losing a race against time. When bags appear under his eyes and hair grows out of his ears, how will he compete for a top's favours when young leaves are also available? Aging doesn't concern a top in the same way, because besides strictly plastic qualities, masculinity, dominance and power are major determinants of his attractiveness. Whether chosen or imposed by outer forces, or a combination of both, the exclusion of mature and aging gays from the entire gay social equation acts like a powerful message that they are irrelevant, which becomes something of a self-fulfilling prophecy? Since we are a social 'species', the mature 'true homosexual' is more than likely to increasingly experience loneliness in the social set up. He didn?t create a family, and it now even turns out that an ACTUAL gay community no longer exists, because the gay-scene has largely been closed-down. Cruising and socializing in the gay-scene was once an exciting lifestyle unfolding in an appealing human scenery he felt he could belong in. And now, what is left?

As the years go by, an outer apport of male vigor and physicality becomes increasingly hard to find. The mature true homosexual doesn't really belong to any human community, and even if sex with strangers may still offer temporary relief, it can't really make up for everything that's missing. He wakes up older and alone in a world that seems colder and unattractive.

An atmosphere of latent tragedy invades the life of the mature gay bottom, as it becomes more apparent that sex is no cure for loneliness. He isn't quite sure whether he loathes or envies the bonded family-units all around him. It somehow seems amazing that just by virtue of her vagina, any random housewife, however plain and vulgar, is ensured a life-long nest, evolving through a warm, supportive environment, sleeping in the strong arms of her husband, every single night.

No.. but we'll move past that for now I guess because we're not talking about the straights (tm) presently.

And now, let's also think of the 'classic homosexual top' It is obvious that his homosexuality doesn't so much involve an idealization of maleness at all. He often likes younger and 'pretty' males, whose youthful flexibility and compliance set the very particular stage for his own male dominance to be 'truly' expressed at last. It's as if with each thrust of his pulsating cock, he is equally claiming possession of all those qualities and skills that are the ticket to mating of the alpha-male in Nature. Only, he doesn't actually have these assets. He is interested in expressing male dominance sexually, even if no actual dominance, control and skill have been acquired.

Even if 100% homosexual, he isn't truly looking for a male principle, neither in his mate, nor in himself. His sense of identity and masculinity and his entire psychological organization isn't profoundly affected by his taste for men, nor a result of it. Rather, his homosexuality strikes us as an a posteriori artefact allowing him to enact being the real man that he isn't really. It's often as if his desire to penetrate other males is infused with a (sometimes barely) hidden purpose: of finding confirmation of his own malehood precisely in his partner's submission. The bot's abdication of male dominance reassures the top that he is himself a real man.

He looks like any regular straight male because the truth is, he isn't all that different. Of course, regular straight males aren't real men either. They are socialized egotists. And that's pretty much what such tops are, regular males expressing what is in reality a very widespread and common drive and need for male power and dominance. The reason this drive is so commonly frustrated is that the social sphere is already fully owned by higher powers. The implication is that no true dominance can exist, and only an imposture of it can remain.

As opposed to most males, these tops have crossed a certain boundary, finding an outlet for very commonly suppressed drives in male/male sex. Indeed, the overflow of countless unmet male needs readily turns to homosexuality, which shouldn't come as a surprise Marital life is unwelcoming of wild, animal sex freed from taboos and fears and hangups and to many males, it simply isn't enough. The inconvenient and politically-incorrect truth is that women typically aren't all that crazy about sex at all. Once she raked in the ring, and the mortgage contract is signed and the first kid is underway, the seductive, compliant little princess readily turns into a poisonous, barren and vindictive witch.

This of course ignores that women often cheat as well because they are bored with marriage. Percentage difference is probably not that dramatic:

Placing focus on the research showing that men statistically cheat somewhere between 20% of the time, when women cheat about 13% of the time is likely the best way to consider men cheating more often than women. Other studies reference that percentage difference being 23% of men and 20% of women.

I think women who dislike sex (which can be for a variety of reasons including most often paraphilic interests that can't be realised in real life physically or perhaps legally,) generally prefer masturbation and/or just stay single. There's just no pressure to get married anymore, so probably 50% or more of people aren't now lol.

Perhaps this is a slight exaggeration, but it is remarkable how many men are 'bi curious' today. The category appears to be growing fast and there is a massively pervasive common theme: their wives never knew what they REALLY want in bed. The bi curious dreams of slick, saucy, dirrrty sex and amazingly, his loving other half never even noticed?

The top has found a scenario that in various ways is ideal, even if it happens more than occasionally that he's not particularly crazy about the bot's cock, and might prefer a vagina. But not to worry, the bot has two orifices, which DOES amply suffice, even if three is better. At least the top is being spared all the hassle and hangups, and the concession is more than worth it. He doesn't even need to pretend it was all about love, rather than sex. Who ever thought things could be this easy! No wonder increasing numbers of married males with unmet sexual drives, that are completely unsuspected by their dull, bourgeois wives, turn to other males?

The excessive focus on tops ignores that actually most of these guys seem to be bottoms in the literal sex act sense (although he later addresses that I think.) That's widely reported and complained about. Even browsing that bisexual subreddit with the masculine married guys most of them seem to be bottoms. Bottoms in general are way more prevalant in Humanity. One guy put it down to Humans being a 'slave species.' But regardless it seems like there are a disproportionate number of afab (genetically female,) people with this instinct who don't have a dick who have to sit around reading excruciatingly painful posts like this online (also to be clear he cheated on his fiance during this experience he's describing):

The first time we hooked up, he was pressed for time. His parents were expecting him to come home and he'd left work early to meet with me. We were both nervous as hell and rushed things. It was, ultimately, enjoyable, but still disappointing. So, at my suggestion, we arranged a second time where we could take our time, and so we did. The experience was utterly mind-blowing and was, honestly, the best sex I've ever had in my entire life. I still vividly remember my arms and legs clutched desperately around him, staring into his eyes as he fucked the longest and most powerful orgasm out of me

I didn't know it could happen, but in that moment I immediately caught feelings for him. I didn't know it was possible to have such an intensely intimate experience with someone. I felt so connected to him and it took me along time to work through that. I was so hurt when he ghosted me a few days later, not that I expected anything in return from him, but more because I thought that maybe it had meant something to him too.

In some ways, I'm still dealing with that, still trying to figure out what it meant and what I'm supposed to do with that now. On my 'gay' days, I fantasize so much about loving another man, giving myself over to him completely like I had with my hookup, being utterly submissive to someone I love in a way that I simply can't replicate in my current relationship--and worse I can't even articulate why I can't replicate that except that, for me, there was something about being penetrated by another man, being so vulnerable and ceding all control to another man, something that is so much more significant in some way than sex with a woman.

I love my fiance, she loves me, and I feel very intimately connected with her. She's tried to 'peg' me a couple of times, and while it has been very enjoyable and even very intimate in its own way it simply isn't the same. I have something wonderful and amazing with her, but it is something different. There's just something qualitatively different about my experiences with men.

God - why are you drunk all the time?



I think this is also a big part of why many women don't like dating bisexual guys. Although there are other reasons like thinking they're feminine and being turned off by that which is unrelated and possibly more common, but definitely the feeling insecure + mate guarding/jealousy thing is present in a lot of afab people regardless of sexuality and gender identity I think.. Potentially anyway. Though it's possible it's more common in [BEEP] women - I don't think research breaking it down yet exists. Will have to look later. I know it's not universal because eg: Kat Blaque who is poly talked about why she won't date married poly guys now (I think maybe I imagined that.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2JgfrsPCqo

Yeah. It might not be in this video (edit: yeah it's not that video. Can't remember which one she mentioned this in now,) but I think she mentions that she encountered women who were OK with her dating their husband because she was a trans woman and maybe that bothered her? Like they considered it OK because they personally didn't see her as a woman. You see this is very different to how a lot of lesbians and other women report feeling where it bothers them more if their partner leaves them or cheats with a guy compared to a woman (although I don't view her as as a guy at all personally but this other woman did obviously and anyway that's kind of besides the point here lol.)

Some gay guys also are more jealous of women so it's not a universal thing. I feel like it's more common though to be more sexually threatened by men but I dunno.

I don't really know what causes this since it doesn't seem to map well onto gender identity or sex and possibly not sexuality either (though again I haven't seen research. It might be that every single woman who has described this is [BEEP] like I say. I mean labels are imperfect so there might be some similarity that transcends labels.)

Why am I so obsessed with this? Well because it causes a lot of pain for me even reading similar accounts about other people's relationships where one has a certain sexuality (usually they have fantasies about being a woman sexually.) Even when I don't know they have that sexuality because they are a masculine guy married to a woman and so on if I look into their post history like I did with the above guy it turned out he had that sexuality. It's so weird. And it created a bunch of insecurities for me which weren't really there when I was a teenager after the first time this was 'triggered.' So I would like to understand this psychological process more.

Also it seems like it would be necessary to understand it since imo it's contributing to the reason women don't want to date bisexual men and why bisexual men often just stay closeted. Likewise with bisexual women and lesbian women. Like there are a lot of issues in the LGBT+ community and in society more generally that are sort of stemming from things that people seem to have little knowlege of and haven't studied.

You just have all these weird instincts and emotional reactions that come out of nowhere while you're in your teens or 20s or something because this isn't known/researched/discussed and conservatives want to ban LGBT+ education (which won't be a real education until people actually understand these things properly. Which they currently don't!) If it's bad enough being cisgender think of how confusing it is to be trans or gender non-conforming with literally no road map for life. Then on top of that you might be autistic or have alexithymia or something (as a disproporinate number of non-binary and trans guys are and trans women in some studies. Are autistic that is but autistic people have high rates of alexithymia.)

We also found that autistic transgender adults reported significantly higher levels of alexithymia than nonautistic transgender adults and potentially higher than autistic cisgender adults.

Literally just wandering around blind.

I totally understand Sephiroth's character arc now. Only there was no experiment (I'm not a conspiracy theorist so no I don't believe vaccines turned people trans/gay/non-binary or something.) Somehow some people just end up this way. Because God is drunk.

Then people are like 'you don't exist.' Etc. That's fun.

So now we get to the crux of this from the writer's pov in the next few paragraphs and how this relates to the quotes from that subreddit I quoted (I could have quoted tons more examples too but don't feel it's necessary to illustrate the point + this post is already going to be long):

This kind of homosexual top isn't too consciously aware of the gay tragedies playing out in the lives of 'true homosexuals', of aging and loneliness, and always being second- best to a real man's real wife? He never fantasized as a little boy about Captain Kirk, Lee Majors and Rock Hudson. Basically, this type is in fact pretty cold-hearted which tragically, tends to make him all the more irresistable to the gay bot?

He has no existential crisis to solve, and isn't focused on dealing with being a different species in a cruel, unwelcoming world. He isn't doubting about anything and has an opportunistic outlook on Life, simply enjoying his fuck-pleasures in a childish way that is unwelcoming of depth, problems and painful philosophizing? We needn't be surprised that the bot, who always seeks love precisely where it can never be found, will readily fall head over heels in love with this type who is necessarily an egotist and sometimes, a malignant narcissist?

Perhaps a reader would like to point out that not all tops are into pretty boys. And it is true that there is another pretty large and growing category of males who simply adopt a homosexual lifestyle, of being another male's 'fuck-buddy'. In this scenario, being a top or a bottom is no longer primarily associated with notions of 'masculinity' and 'femininity, idealization, romance or love. The homosexual act simply reflects a sexual preference and not much more. Some men like to take it up the [BEEP] just because it feels good? others like to [BEEP] it: why not make a deal and create a win/win situation?

Top-males of this type actually prefer saucy sodomy with older males, and/or hairy and fat ones, over banging the faggoty Gucci-model who talks with a lisp, walks with a wish and is always high maintenance. Having a beer or manly talk with a sissy is impossible, and he is much too different to be a buddy. In fact, the sissy's dramatized sexuality interferes with the top's real desire, of base, animal, saucy male/male virile sex. So his preference is for more manly types, who actually love getting fucked.

Such tops are into men who look and act like real males, and who can never represent an 'other half', but that isn't the objective anyway. They are not looking for difference, but really for sameness. Characteristic of such male/male sex isn't so much the need to find an opposite masculine or feminine principle in a sex-partner, but simply to use sex as a way of bonding and experiencing pleasure with peers. When the gay-scene still existed, this type of gay man was often found in circles of bears and leather, or maybe of bikers, and it's all about a way of relating to other males in life through sex. The heavy emphasis is on the sexual experience ITSELF. Some guys like to get their [BEEP] pounded, and others like to do the pounding, but little male/female polarity is otherwise apparent, or sought.

The gay bottom in such relationships usually seeks sexual highs in an addiction-pattern, and significantly lacks the 'romantic dimension' that comes in when opposites attract. Sex turns into an entire lifestyle on a daily basis, and issues of identity are largely ignored, considered irrelevant? No 'androgynous', 'hermaphroditic', or otherwise atypical male qualities are apparent. The psychic life of such bots is mainly organized in ways similar to those of his sexual mate, and of most 'normal' males. The biggest difference is really that he is more hedonistic, and usually becomes a slave of his own pleasures, which itself may have feminizing effects?

The point is that technically, he might be a 'gay bottom', but his homosexuality doesn?t define all that much more than his sex-life. He isn't a very 'different species'?

This kind of friendship + sex thing is fine imo when you find other people who are on the same page, but not really when you don't.

A lot of these guys kind of plan to one day find a woman to settle down with, or alternatively - and seems to be not uncommon on that subreddit as I said - they are already married to a woman and cheat because she's not OK with an open relationship or they assume she won't be. Either that or live in frustration due to sexual boredom.

Some guys don't have a preference romantically one way or the other (but this seems like a smaller group honestly,) but just due to numbers will obviously end up with women more often if they don't have a preference.

And so we?re not talking about these types either. Let's try to keep a general vision in mind of a 'classic gay bottom', who doesn?t feel like other males from an early age, and who indeed did become something of a 'personage', the prototypical gay man who dreams of the strong arms of an alpha-male just like a young girl would? Are we on the same page? I think everyone gets the general picture. We're trying to capture a ballpark idea of an essential, core homosexual phenomenon, that involves fundamental attraction to maximum maleness and masculinity, and a sensed absence of it in oneself.

Yeah so I assume that guy identifies as a 'bottom' in the sense he's using it. But I've only skim read the very long pdf so I don't know if he ever addresses himself. It's just based on the emotional style of writing about these things I assume he has personal insight but I could be wrong. BAP said he was gay anyway and from skimming before I remember him being a conspiracy theorist etc.

He then goes onto discuss his theory for why certain men end up as essentially feminine homosexuals. I've only skimread this and a lot of the text as I say. I don't agree entirely with his conclusions that I have read, and as I said he also engaged in a bunch of conspiratorial thinking also anti-semitic (he has used the word Jewish 225 times,) which I disagree with. But I am focussing more on his core emotional complaints and how that fits in.

He also really hates Judith Butler haha. I've not read any of her work and probably wouldn't agree with it because I do find the culture that seems to have originated from it and discussion and even her quoting from her own book in one video I watched vague, hard to listen to/not accessable, and not practically useful. I don't hate her though. A lot of people really hate her.

Anyway that gay guy's writing ultimately inspired parts of Bronze Age Pervert's text Bronze Age Mindset:

The peculiar "history" of how the queen develops, the modern effeminate homosexual, is very telling. The problem of the modern homosexual is revealing because it is the model according to which many other kinds of higher life have been thwarted and warped into something else. Don't be fooled by propagandists: the modern homo has nothing to do with ancient "predatory bisexuality" or with the pederastic rites found in many societies. On one hand such people as the modern queen have always existed but on the other, there are many specimens now who become this, who would not have before. It is very unfortunate event in life of animal.

Camille Paglia says that the modern homosexual is the product of the pressures of post-industrial life. Her model for this is that a very sensitive young boy, open to aesthetic experience of all kinds, maybe the kind of slightly neurotic and artistic boy that a century ago would have experienced synaesthesia; such boy is turned off by the horseplay and "rough" masculinity of his brothers and father and other boys his age. The distancing from this masculinity is concurrent with his becoming over- close with his mother, idolizing the feminine: upon puberty, the distance or fear from masculinity leads him to eroticize it, while he turns away from women, either because of too much familiarity, or too much awe. In this she is only half right, and the other half of the story I discovered from an alien mind whose teachings have been spread among some of the frogs. His name Harro MJ, but I think this is false name. I tell some of his ideas here as best I understood. He tells I believe his own story, or someone he knows: he tells of how modern world corrupted his nature through stricture and turned him into a homo. But I think his story speaks to many others, who didn't turn into ghey, but who have nevertheless been disfigured in some other way? by the same force.

Now, Paglia's restatement of Freud is correct, but she misses an important element of the story, which is why such a boy turns away from the masculinity of his peers in the first place. It is not horseplay or the roughness of male competition as such that makes him turn away, but the utterly fake or artificial character of such displays, usually, in our time. Such boy perceives what his peers don't, the conditional and entirely dependent character of life in our age. It is not the masculinity, the competition for status among men, the physical roughness, that makes him turn away? but the fact that all such play is happening in already owned space. It is this aspect of our time that is crucial to understand.

I believe boy like this is one of the types that sees through the charade the lords of lies have dangled in front, the shadow-play to dazzle the many, and he is turned off, maybe not by manliness, but the buffoonish, deluded character of modern masculinity. The defeated male that is turned into a peon and a neutered beast for women and hidden masters is a terrible thing to see. The jockeying for status, the physical fights, the adventures boys are supposed to have in a state of nature?all of this is in nature meant as preparation for life, for a life of conquest and expansion. Roman teenagers of patrician class were sent already on missions on behalf of Empire abroad. Modern adult Western male seeks permission to watch other men playing sports, quaff vegetable oil relish, beg for "coochie" in simulated intercourse, masturbation with plastic on dick. Precisely a character born for conquest, for expansion, a precocious type of boy who seeks real development and the real domination of the space around him, who understands in his blood that play and manliness are to this end, precisely such a boy will have his expectations about life crushed and thwarted as soon as his eyes open.

They submit to the yoke and their sham simulated masculinity is now a parody of the true manliness, which in a state of ascent develops into the will to actually dominate space around oneself, not into a caricature for the benefit of women. But this domination is not possible when space is already owned. This intuition of owned space comes on one very early: with eyes open, it's like an evil spirit inhabits everything. I think there are many types of energetic and perceiving boys who reach this stage, who are turned off by the moral and biological self-castration of their conventional peers, who sense the suffocating limitations of modern space.

So this was of course the core issue for Ted Kaczynski also and why he wanted to destroy industral society. No one really discusses this though. After many years of living in the woods which was itself an attempt to escape his own sexual urge to become a woman (which almost led to him pursuing a medical gender transistion.) He realised that most people and even himself couldn't live removed from industrial society and so it should be destroyed. The transistion was the tipping point which led him to escape into the woods, but the encroachment of civilisation into his 'territory' was essentially what led him to carry out the bombing campaign. So it's important to make that distinction for clarity.

As I walked away from the building afterwards, I felt disgusted about what my uncontrolled sexual cravings had almost led me to do [undergo a sex-change operation], and I felt humiliated, and I violently hated the psychiatrist. Just then there came a major turning point in my life. Like a phoenix in mythology, a bird that burned to ashes only to be reborn, I burst from the ashes of my despair to a glorious new hope. I thought I wanted to kill that psychiatrist because the future looked utterly empty to me. I felt I wouldn't care if I died. And so I said to myself, why not really kill the psychiatrist and anyone else whom I hate? What is important is not the words that ran through my mind but the way I felt about them. What was entirely new was the fact that I really felt I could kill someone. My very hopelessness had liberated [freed] me because I no longer cared about death. I no longer cared about consequences, and I said to myself that I really could break out of my rut in life and do things that were daring, irresponsible or criminal.

The rest of this story is more particular to the boy who as response becomes a homo or trap,

In becoming "gay" he believes he is escaping that sense of primal limitation and subjection that he felt as a small boy: he has reinterpreted his entire drama as a maudlin story of sexuality suppressed or oppressed by retrograde social and political norms. In this he becomes an unwitting pawn himself of the very power that as a young boy he had intuited to be the enemy, the great and suffocating shadow of our time, that smothers all higher life out. The gay is the spiritual foot-soldier of the new regime, when he is born to be its enemy. This is the unusual part of this realization, that some of the most sensitive and perceptive youths, those maybe imbued with spark of inspiration and a conquering, expanding spirit, end up becoming the vanguard of that which has smothered and broken them. In a previous age they wouldn't have been gay at all in the first place. The story of such boy is story of all higher types in our time.

Nyx Land (who doesn't get attention like these other figures at least yet because feminine dominance is always working in shadow - OK now I'm just taking the piss with the poetic drama of it all lol,) who is actually a lesbian trans woman had an opposing take on all of this which seemed sort of vaguely rooted in Solanas's idea that "if men were wise they would seek to become women." And that essentially everything will return to that gradually regardless of this ongoing protest of masculinity - which she sees as futile, because femininty has become connected to technological development and masculinity primativism. She even invented a fun lesbian origin story:

Suppose rather that the Serpent was not Satan himself, but merely a common demon birthed by Lilith. An impersonator of Satan acting in Lilith?s stead to tempt Eve. We could then look at the story of the Serpent and Eve as Lilith?s lesbian seduction of Eve with the mediating artificial cthonic phallus (a dildo). From this, Eve was given the earthly knowledge of sexuality that awoke her from the empty and boring pleasures of Eden. Lilith of course was not to be tied down, and so Eve had to return to Adam and bide her time. And so Eve becomes the first follower of Lilith on the path of a radical separation with the masculine ruling principle of the universe and Divine universal ordering, towards the infinite cthonic upswelling. She wields the unholy pseudo-phallus or anti-phallus that does not produce the creative masculine seed that connects straight up through the Tree of Life back up to Kether, but rather only produces a sterile and destructive imitation. An Ac?phallus from which spurts only venom.

The Acephallus is the anti-phallus or castrated phallus, the decapitated phallus, the Crown of the Tree of Life thrown asunder. Superficially, a hermaphroditic mixing of feminine and masculine attributes, but more accurately described as a feminine imitation of masculinity. A mockery, even. In figures such as Baphomet which are often treated as symbolic or synonymous with Satan and the Left-Hand Path, there famously is a mixing of male and female attributes.[9] But the supposed hermaphrodism of Baphomet et. al. is merely an ignorant and archaic understanding of both gender and Satanism. As has already been at length drawn out, the vampire queen Lilith gives birth only to monsters and demons; she rejects the primordial male creative energies and can only therefore birth [BEEP] imitations of God. Baphomet, therefore, is all woman; her appearance is inconsequential to this fact.

The Acephallus is a rejection of the reproduction of God through heterosexual human reproduction. The Acephallus reproduces itself by reproducing the void, in a lesbian and also virus-like fashion. "Let a thousand sexes bloom" -- but of all the mutations of the virus, woman is the strain that it begins and ends with. Woman, the occulted non-gender, the zero -- her time has come.

Sort of an anti Paglia/masculinism. So I suppose to these guys she would be some kind of defector.

This is just one of many ideological lenses. Obviously some people equate both femininity and masculinity with nature and androgyny with technology and that makes a bit more sense to me I think.

I also don't think of Lilith, Satan or any of these symbols being purely female or male and she tries to collapse androgyny into femaleness basically. Mostly because she equates Lilith with a binary lesbian identity. I mean she doesn't avoid the androgyny because she can't but she still tries to collapse it. Pure femininity isn't in competition with masculinity in the way androgyny is though.

This is the function of the Acephallus as a rejection of the reterritorializing masculine force that women are given the duty to form. The Acephallus sets free a process for smoothing the space on which parties of demons take flight out of Heaven to spread their venomous seed into the black and hateful earth on the nightside of Eden. This in other words is the Body without Sex Organs.

...This seems like a reference to the concept 'Body without organs' from the writing of Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guattari. Which I've not read.

*reads reddit post I've just stumbled on*

These elements and the typical thematic elements Accelerationists love to use, favoring theory fiction and cybergothic imagery it tends to be rather poetic at times, are completely absent in Vicky's works and those derived from it. This is in contrast to N1x/Nyx Land's (it?s a pseudonym for a friend of mine, completely different person from Nick Land) which predates Vicky's work and identifies trans women as molecular cyborgs caught in the same kind of trap as artificial intelligences in that if we fail to pass as human/are revealed to be trans we are killed or persecuted quite regularly but this is evaded with new strategies and tactics often utilizing technology to evade the carceral logics of our human oppressors, turning our existence into a guerrila war in conspiracy with the feminizing flows of technocapital. Which isn't to say "capitalism is our friend" but that our struggle is one which is in line with the social repercussions of technocapital disrupting bioessentialist patriarchal logic through the undermining the male supremacy myth.

Probably important to note as well that in being a development of Deleuze and Guattari and the Situationists, Accelerationism is also a synthesis of those ideas with materialist Cyberfeminism, and g/Acc (Gender Accelerationism) is a recentering of the feminist elements of Accelerationism through a transfeminist lens.

Lol reminding me of Contrapoints recent tweet:



No you can't make me!

I can tell reading any of this stuff would be above my level/give me a headache lol.

edit: Actually I always thought the title 'capitalism and schizophrenia' is really interesting lol but as I said I've read related wikipedia pages etc before so I think it

In the book, Deleuze and Guattari developed the concepts and theories in schizoanalysis, a loose critical practice initiated from the standpoint of schizophrenia and psychosis as well as from the social progress that capitalism has spurred. They refer to psychoanalysis, economics, the creative arts, literature, anthropology and history in engagement with these concepts.[1] Contrary to contemporary French uses of the ideas of Sigmund Freud, they outlined a "materialist psychiatry" modeled on the unconscious regarded as an aggregate of productive processes of desire, incorporating their concept of desiring-production which interrelates desiring-machines and bodies without organs, and repurpose Karl Marx's historical materialism to detail their different organizations of social production, "recording surfaces", coding, territorialization and the act of "inscription". Friedrich Nietzsche's ideas of the will to power and eternal recurrence also have roles in how Deleuze and Guattari describe schizophrenia; the book extends from much of Deleuze's prior thinking in Difference and Repetition and The Logic of Sense that utilized Nietzsche's ideas to explore a radical conception of becoming.

I just no. Probably no.

Anyway you can see can see this difference expressed in how people feel about abortion here:

Forty-five percent of "completely feminine" women say that abortion should be illegal in most or all cases, compared with just 26 percent of other women. Similarly, 49 percent of "completely masculine" men say that abortion should be mostly or always illegal, compared with 31 percent of other men. Put another way, "completely feminine" women have much more in common with "completely masculine" than they do with other women. Just so, men who don?t assert a "completely masculine" gender identity have abortion attitudes much closer to women who don?t say that they're "completely feminine" than they do with other men.

As with everything this is a spectrum but it starts to express itself in voting habits. And what a coincidence as Lilith has certain symbolic associations. The author James Joyce refered to her as the 'patron of abortion'

PS: there is a transmasculine equivalent also written by a trans man and it predates even the black paper, it's called Testojunkie.

Lol just learning of this now. Definitely have to check that out sometime. Transmasculine writing is the darkest shadow of all. No someone definitely needs to shoot me lmfao. It's not actually anyway it has a wikipedia page and was published etc (unlike the black paper.) I just never heard about it.

She has a massive gaping black hole in her theory where she doesn't include trans men but most people do.

This idea of sex of men and women in competition that some feel will ultimately lead to radical separatism on both sides or domination of one over the other. This end result feels like it could be a purely Western abberation due to repression of androgyny. I think Plato said it best:

There were three kinds of human beings, that's my first point--not two as there are now, male and female. In addition to these, there was a third, a combination of those two; its name survives, though the kind itself has vanished. At that time, you see, the word 'androgynous' really meant something: a form made up of male and female elements, though now there?s nothing but the word, and that's used as an insult.

"Now here is why there were three kinds, and why they were as I described them: the male kind was originally an offspring of the sun, the female of the earth, and the one that combined both genders was an offspring of the moon, because the moon shares in both. They were spherical, and so was their motion, because they were like their parents in the sky.

And when some people do hallucinogenic drugs they appear to encounter this issue with dichotomies like Christianity:

Something I found fascinating was the entities which people encountered often became less friendly as time went on. And become outright hostile when talking about God and Jesus.

They don't like Christianity much but if you start telling them about the Greek/Roman or Egyptian Gods they'll get friendlier and may bestow gifts if you prove you are willing to delve deeper in connecting with these Gods.

But it's as BAP said the Western cannon- including the ancient Greek one to a lesser extent - involved masculine domination. But also increasing repression of androgyny. This symbolism doesn't extend easily to creative or technological domains though. Hence Nyx's framing. The more masculinity tries to escape through primativism, the more it resembles the grass huts Paglia likes to associate with women. Yet BAP isn't really in favour of that either:

As a rule, life is stunted and deformed by huemans. This is why huemans are disgusting as an animal, and must be overcome. This is the "free and primitive life" of the noble savage, this is the "matriarchy" that keeps its faith to nature in "sustainable" form. In fact the society of the grass hut is hardly sustainable: such places are rapacious of natural resources, and often vicious to animals
and vicious tyrants to people.

Masculinity seeks to seperate itself from femininity. And tbh, I doubt very feminine people have a problem with that because they also probably seek seperation.

Who does BAP specifically bring up as contradicting his homosocial desires?

In Athens the two friends Harmodius and Aristogeiton put down the tyranny through their schemes and their bravery: this is, you know, why all tyrants and totalitarians are suspicious of strong friendships between men. Most of all this is feared by the middle-aged lesbos and defectives that are used as guards by our prison-states. And yes, I know the rumors that these friendships were sexual, but I believe this is misunderstanding and exaggeration promoted by the homonerds of our time, for reasons I will explain later. The model for all

He dislikes nerds but has a seperate category for that. I guess equating them with 'betas.' Thinks they make up a lot of the right. Presumably referring to people like Ben Shapiro, and Jordan Peterson.

Should the tyranny that has descended on our age ever gain the power it seeks and then be challenged enough to feel itself in danger, the mass annihilations that will be carried out by homosexual, transsexual, and especially lesbian commissars will exceed in scale and cruelty anything that has yet happened in known history. Imagine lesbian mulatta commissars with young Martin Sheen face and haircut manning the future Bergen-Belsens, installations that will span tens of miles.

He's a little dramatic.

Androgynous people. Specifically lesbians though and 'lesbians' as he writes of male androgynous people - trans and homosexual - as being repressed masculine men. Perhaps the most masculine men of all. He can't write about lesbians or genetically female androgynous people this way (that would go against the entirity of Western canon after all,) and under no circumstances will such people accept their castration/feminisation. So they must be demonised and repressed and turned into Satan and Lilith figures.

In this sense Nyx is very perceptive. Not that she's the only one who made this symbolic connection:



Lol also heterofatalism pops up in Bronze Age Mindset xD:

So by all means, have a girlfriend and a family, but I fear that too much focus on this as a "statement" against the program of the enemy is a mistake. Usually a family is the end of a man. This can be both good and bad. But the necessities of caring for a family, and the emotional demands, usually blind him to anything higher.

I've mentioned this video before which really is one part satire and one part truth about that book (though she understates it if anything):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8DbxAqPim8

It looks like someone else has made a video titled '[BEEP] Literature review: Bronze Age Mindset' over the past few months lol. Haven't watched it yet.

Lol yeah she's doing the same thing (and in response to the original even) so it's kind of unecessary but on the other hand she included the kouroi statue quote which is kind of necessary:



And this book has become very influential among those in power. So it has to be taken seriously for this reason if nothing else.

You can see some of these ideas in that twitter poster I recently discovered who writes in a somewhat stylistically similar way to BAP. But as far as I can tell - because it is hard to read his writing and understand his ideas - that person has mutated the ideas slightly so that it's like a war between which sex castrates which sex of psychologically hermaphroditic Humans.

So he fears the evo-pysch hypothetical of women who are attracted specifically to 'gracile males' becoming dominant and then evolving into 'hyena doms' (hyenas being a species where females are dominant and have a pseudo-penis,) or preying mantises in terms of sexual stategies.

It's all, needless to say, highly romantic. /s x1000

Anyway though this is all a huge tangent that's often on my mind. But it stems like everything Humans do from very base emotions like loneliness, desire for power etc.

It's not really fun to be on either side of the 'madonna/whore' complex honestly. Sure some people can handle it on a small scale. But a lot of people are getting hurt. Especially from the widespread cheating that no one seems to give a [BEEP] about on social media, and actually appears to be being promoted by the mainstream media:

I'm married and I've had six affairs ? my husband is still my one and only, I don't consider it cheating

"It's kind of like a new hobby more than anything else, is that bad to say? My husband is none the wiser because he loves his quiet time at the weekend so I just say I'm off out with friends, he's probably pleased I'm out the house more."

Laura adds: "My husband is still my one and only, I don't want anyone else. Even after meeting different men I still only have eyes for my husband.

"And that?s why I kind of don't consider it cheating really. But I doubt he or my family would understand so I definitely think it?s best I just keep this to myself.

Illicit Encounters is the UK's leading website for married people wanting to have an affair. Marriages are happier as a result of affairs.

Oh? I think not.

One Scottish chaser (guy who's mostly into trans women, and married to a trans woman in South East Asia) who's blog I read for a while was very keen on the solution of people like this transistioning (but he has an obvious bias in this area.) Of course some do, but he basically suggested they all should so they can find a romantic relationship. Otherwise he believes they partner up with each other (which he referred to as lesbian relationships.) Which he imagines is unsatisfying (presumably believing lesbian relationships outside butch/femme dichotomies are also unsatsifying.) Or they stay single for their whole life, or they get stuck in a kind of negative situation with 'narcissistic masc gay men' who just wants sex as he puts it. A lot of the ways he broke down the gay male community was similar to the stuff that other guy was doing with his writing but he had some other ideas as well that he hadn't mentioned. Well he had a low opinion of them anyway but the main issue is that because these other guys demand masculinity you have to pretend to be as masculine as possible in order to be attractive. Especially as you age. Which is difficult if it doesn't come naturally.

I feel like culture has changed a lot though since the time of Quentin Crisp (who this other guy uses as an example.) There are other kinds of androgynous guys now like you have Jeffree Star who is kind of a girlboss type and bisexual like a lot of women (and bisexual in a similar way to a lot of women as well where he has casual sex with women but clearly prefers guys for long term relationships.) He basically has the alt-girl bisexual stereotypical persona + background as a man lol.... Well there are some differences but similar.

This also doesn't really explain the weird edge cases I've come across who eg: are very feminine seemingly, live as homosexual men for a while, transistion to women and then just decide to form relationships with women anyway... Not just people like Gigi Gorgeous who dated a butch woman who later came out as a trans man. I mean plenty of cis women follow a trajectory like that especially later in life or if they have a particular preference for trans men (which often develops earlier in life like a mirror of the guys who are into trans women.) I'm also not talking about bisexual trans women or trans women who dated women before coming out and weren't particuarly feminine (maybe physically/stylistically androgynous but not behaviourally. Like Contrapoints.) I mean like feminine trans women who end up in relationships with feminine women (often cisgender.) Also come out as lesbians later.

I think this is very rare but I can think of a few examples from YouTube. Perhaps they also changed later and were just more convincing? Perhaps they were never really attracted to men at all? One non-binary person did say they wrote a bunch of lesbian fiction before as a teenager so you know. Hard to say really. Their backstory was very interesting lol they came out as a gay man, then a trans woman, then non-binary then mostly lesbian lol. Also people with complete androgen insensitivity syndrome often are bisexual. I mean feminine cis lesbians who are attracted to other feminine women and have relationships with them that aren't short term exist too anyway.

But sexuality seems a bit more complicated than most of the models people are using. Tbf I think later on that 'chaser' guy mentioned that some 'feminine homosexual' guys he found in South East Asia were also bisexual. They topped with women and bottomed with guys (according to him.) He also felt they were slightly more maculine like a spectrum. Not sure if he just projected that because they were having sex with women. (He also differentiated these guys from masculine straight-passing bisexual men.) He was often talking about South East Asia and comparing it to the West since he lived there. He was one of those angry guys who ragequit the West and disliked feminism but also specifically into trans women. We now call them 'passport bros' I guess lol. But that seems like a slightly different vibe.

This is kind of a wider cultural problem though we don't really have anything for older single people in general to do. In the past people would just join some kind of religious organisation I guess but that's not so appealing for most these days (the mainstream religions anyway.) We still have cults lol.

[Nyctophilia]

He always kind of was camp but the funny thing about this is the more he's headed in a kind of Christian conservative direction the more flamboyant his clothing has gotten. It's sort of like how his home is apparently full of soviet art and not only that but he felt the need to bring that up in at least several interviews over the years.



https://x.com/thebadstats/status/1790392056701198575

As time goes on more and more of Jordan Peterson's arguments are just this, whatever this is

I wish I could embed the video too because it really adds to it. He's doing this funny voice while doing impressions of people he disagrees with.

Imagine him saying this in a really high pitched voice lol:

'There's no such thing as hell. Have it your way buddy.'

I will have it my way thanks.

"Can't you just call the poor victims what they want? It's a byproduct of neural activity. well why isn't your solar plexus conscious then? You can't have a woodburning fireplace! These bloody nature worshippers"

Oh my God everything's coming to and end.

Yes that's exactly what you sound like Jordan that energy 'oh my God everything's coming to an end!'

'We have to use pronouns. It's like [BEEP] you buddy seriously'

Jordan you know you don't have to put on a higher pitched voice, you already famously sound like Kermit.

It's OK I still think guys with high pitched voices sound really cute/attractive:





In spite of everything you're always doing to ruin the image.

I spent time identifying as non-binary. I've dated men and women, trans and non binary individuals, and I've noticed I gravitate more to being more masculine when I date feminine people or women, and I tend to be more feminine when I date men.

I see so many people say stuff like this and it's interesting because I feel the opposite when considering attraction.

Jordan Peterson regrets having Destiny on his podcast because he was too argumentative. He preferred having Russell Brand on, who verbally fellated him for 90 minutes about how much of a genius he was.

I didn't watch the whole thing I only saw clips of it lol.

What he actually said in the clip is he doesn't like talking to people who want to be right and Destiny wants to be right. Which is fair enough but that is most people tbh. He said he stopped doing that when he was 23 and thinks it's a 'prideful worship of the Luciferian intellect and it's a bad idea a really bad idea.'

Anyway this sort of answers my question about why he doesn't talk to people he actually disagrees with strongly. He used to I guess in interviews but he very clearly dislikes talking to people he disagrees with. He says he can talk to Russel Brand and they disgree on lots of things but I don't see that. What I saw in clips is Russel Brand just agreeing with him more and more on important things over time. Destiny, presumably doesn't. But Destiny probably agrees with him more than most of the left and he can't even hack that lol. Which says a lot about ingroup/outgroup dynamics.

He vaguely compared him to a watered down psychopth I think (cause he's disagreeable,) which was amusing but tbf I think Destiny has referred to himself as a psychopath before anyway:



When he gives him a defintion of psychopathy he's like

'OK maybe that might be true'

*writes down notes to check later*

And I imagine that really irked Jordan too.

cracks me up. The comments too:

It's so annoying that this guy is interrupting Jordan every 2 seconds

When people insult me online, I imagine someone a lot like Destiny sitting there behind the screen.

JP is a PhD. Psychologist who has taught at Harvard. He gives "Destiny", a college dropout, a definition of psychopathy. Destiny replies, "maybe that might be true".

I feel like destiny is low-key asking if he is a psychopath and Jordan Peterson is low-key saying… Maybe…

Destiny saying to Psychologist "Ok, that might be the truth." about something he has zero knowledge about himself is so pure ^^

Jordan does say things that are incorrect often. Social media personalities and political commentators lie a lot and that transcends professional background. So you shouldn't assume. Many qualified people disagree with him on a range of topics too.

"Ok yeah that might be True" said the video gamer to the psychologist after being explained the definition of psychopathy

Well ironically the sad thing is because of that field and lack of knowledge video gamers, artists and entertainers (including streamers and YouTubers,) have to do the job of a therapist in the culture lol. I'm not even joking I've had people commenting on my gaming videos like 'this is helping me with depression' or something.

And all while being mostly mentally ill themselves lol.

Decent quality therapy is for various reasons inaccessible to most people. I'm being mostly helped by musicians myself.

In a very real and direct sense video game streamers have to deal with the failures of psychological and mental health professionals and treatment programs, and the failures of economics both in their own life and the lives of members of their audience. A bit like sex workers.

And it's not helping people in a significant way in terms of their lives. Like it's not practicially improving anything (most of the time anyway.) It's basically stopping people from feeling worse than they otherwise would about their lives.



"Your existence has changed a lot of lives."

"I'm still alive thanks to you."

"That isn't true."

It must be quite difficult being as popular as he is too. I get comments that are like a much less intense form of that from time to time and I'm a very small channel on YouTube. No one's said 'I'm still alive thanks to you.' That's a lot of responsibility. Imagine if he disappears one day (which eventually he will,) all these people will just lose that coping mechanism. Scary.

Also lol I love how his chat is like harassing him with nice/cute stuff and he's like 'nope.' Tsundere.

Do you know why I think it helps by the way? Especially with streamers? It's because a lot of what therapy is is just the psychological sense of someone listening to you. It's so sad. They just want to feel 'heard.' People pay for that.

So they send in messages and sometimes the streamer responds to them. Or if they respond to someone else asking a question that person also had it's sort of like they're being responded to. Or when streamers or YouTubers say stuff they can relate to or talk to their audience they feel like they are being 'heard.' And can relate for a moment.

Nostalgic type stuff makes people feel happy or comforted too because it helps with loneliness (that's proven in research,) so I think some of my content appeals to people for that reason. They also like surreal stuff especially gen z. Gen z really like surreal stuff. So my stuff is kind of surreal and I think some people like that too.

And there's an illusion of a community too. I can't really give that to people though because of anxiety and fear of people online. Like people have asked me to set up a discord server and I can't do that. I've seen it go badly for other people and don't want to manage that. I also find it very difficult to talk to people. I respond to people's comments and messages on social media but I can't do live chat or stream. Someone asked if I'd consider streaming too. Some people just like my voice so one person said they'd listen if I just did a podcast. But yeah the anxiety.

But yeah all things increasingly absent from people's real life.

When it comes to the most popular content creators that's what they actually want and what they're actually paying for when they do ime. Not just the entertainment of someone playing video games. After all F1nn stopped playing Minecraft years ago. (Well at least as his predominant content creation thing.)



She's doing the nostalgia thing too. It's the skateboarding clips that really work for me personally. Clever.

Jordan Peterson has helped a lot of people but mostly by being on or being posted on social media (like his lectures from years ago getting posted online etc,) but there's lots of people he can't help because he doesn't understand them or is antagonistic to them like trans and non-binary people. Or maybe liberals lol. Most women as well.

A lot of right wing men are like 'women will never be happy. They're crazy. They're supposed to be miserable.' And they write it off.

Skill issue. And you want to go to Mars? Lol.

Obviously that requires entirely different skillsets but it's still funny. It's more complicated than space travel you think?

Oh it's poetic really. 'Men are from Mars' aren't they?

No wonder there's an increasing pattern where women aren't enthusiastic about space travel.

I still think it's cool though. Not this weird symbolic capitalistic individualistic masculine competition to escape women through technology but space travel in general.

I'm always focussed on autonomy. It's like with artificial wombs. The motivation for a lot of men online is 'we're going to replace women' weird. I already have a womb I just don't want to use it... No doubt why I'm not bitter about that. Future people that are similar to me might find that useful. Homosexual men and some trans couples too.

These are the pro-technology masculinists obviously. There are many primitivists floating around too.

Can't believe Bethesda made a video game involving space travel when they make my favourite RPG's and it didn't look good enough for me to play. How is that even possible? I've wanted like a good RPG-like space travel game for years. The art style also put me off I dunno. It just didn't work for me when watching videos and lots of people were complaining.

I guess I don't play new games as often now too but still.

"Just mod everything you want into the game, what's the big deal?" The fact that some people say that unironically is depressing.

Yeah I don't like this culture at all. It is the same with The Sims 4. Of course modders can get paid now and do (but by the community not eg: EA,) but there's no expectation that they will and why should they create your game for you for free?

There's a difference between: 'this game is fun. And I have a cool idea for a mod.' and 'this game is crap and we all paid money for it... How can we make this fun/playable?'

Especially when the company starts to depend on it. You also often notice that the larger the company gets and the more removed from the original concept the team gets (like with sequels to games,) the worse the end product becomes. It starts to seem like most people working on it don't play the game (so they don't notice very annoying bugs,) have no familiarity with the lore or the tone of the game, or what makes the game fun...

But there's also too much bureaucracy with large development teams and I imagine that's the primary problem with fixing things. There will be bugs that modders can fix in a day if someone asks that EA can't manage to fix in 9+ years of frequent game updates (the amount of updates in TS4 is annoying as you have to update various mods etc everytime, and still these bugs aren't fixed.) I think because they want people working on new DLC etc because that's where the money is.

The Sims is even worse because they have no competition in the genre meaning they really can (for now,) do whatever they want. But there are some other people working on alternative lifesim titles now weirdly all at the same time and only recently.

[Nyctophilia]

Finally.



Though I'm not optimistic. (About the Tories getting voted out considering how long they've been in power now but also not optimistic about politics in general.)

Someone in the background is playing things can only get better lmfao.

He's just standing there in the rain in a suit which is very British.

[Nyctophilia]

Hi there everyone

Just to start with iam not a trans chaser or anything bad in my mind.

Now to my question.

Why do I get accused of being a trans chaser when I say that I am not into men but I am trying to find a date with woman? Is it a must to be into men before I can get accepted to date (MtF) ?

Is there something wrong with being attracted to woman without being attracted to men ?

3 I have tryed multiple places to ask for advice how to approach a trans, because I always get accused for something, keep in mind that I have never dated a trans before and really don't wanna make anyone feel bad if I say something wrong that’s why iam trying to as advice?

He's not trying to date a woman (in general,) though he's specifically trying to find a trans woman:

That is so true it's hard to meet woman when I am only around straight cis girls.

This type of sentence makes you seem like a chaser, and your post history doesn't help either.

Trans women don't want to date you and are getting defensive and upset with you because it's clear you're seeking us out because you're hyperfixated on our genitals in a way that is unfair and extremely unrealistic.

I'll copypaste a few things I wrote to other people who asked questions almost exactly like yours:

"When someone """prefers""" a "woman with a dick", they aren't just hoping for the aesthetics. They're wanting the unrealistic fantasy of a woman with a fully functional cock that she plans on KEEPING fully functional basically forever (which usually involves changing your hormone regimen under supervision of your doctor and/or taking erection medication) and they're expecting--and feel entitled to having--said trans woman to be a top sexually. They expect trans women to both have and maintain in perpetuity their own highly mainstream-trans-porn-influenced ideal of what they think "trans bodies" should be.

For cis men especially the odds of finding a trans woman whose sexuality centers around her topping cis men is astronomically low, almost sub-1% low. According to the few statistics we have, only 1.8% of trans women identify as tops and a good two thirds of those are in some way WLW. And now take into consideration that trans women are only .50% of the population at most. Now take into consideration that happily non-op trans women are probably hovering somewhere around the 5% of that .50%.) [...]

Yeah it's dumb. There are more cis women and non-binary people who are willing to try strap on sex and are attracted to men but they don't want that. Then again, even then probably most prefer androgynous guys. No one really wants what they can realistically get.

I also just have to point out how in most contexts "It's hard to find a woman to date when I'm only around cis straight women" just sounds ridiculous unless you're a sapphic woman or look like one. Like saying that as a gender conforming man (let's assume,) is hilarious. I know he's just looking for trans women or mostly looking for trans women but it just tickles me. Like I imagine him standing in a room full of women like 'there's just no women anywhere.'

It's the straight part which makes me know that he wants to get topped though... Lol.... (More on that later in the post.) Either that or some other stereotype about [BEEP] women. I mean why include that?

I'm not a trans woman so my opinion doesn't really matter but I think a lot of people are going to have preferences realistically including myself so I'd be hypocritical to care about his. It's annoying if someone expects you to do certain sex acts especially when they run completely contrary to what most people even want but it's still assumed.

When I was trying to find the Kat Blaque video before I couldn't find it and instead found a video where she talks about this other thing I was looking for a while back coincidentally which is a bit annoying lol. I thought she'd deleted most of her videos talking about this but she hasn't removed this one:



She gets rejected by guys assuming she's non-binary and has female genitals when she doesn't, and the guys who reject her for that also seem to automatically assume any non-binary people they come across would want to use their female genitals (and let's be honest want to get penetrated.) Annoying for everyone involved.

"Oh but you look like a bottom"

And yet I'm not. Maybe something about the label non-binary should suggest that you shouldn't make any assumptions.

And here's an even more culturally radical idea. Maybe you shouldn't even assume with cis women. Maybe they're only into oral sex.



"They do not fall into your fucking categories. Who knows maybe they aren't even gay. Maybe just maybe Caleb's had sex with women. Multiple, multiple women. Or maybe he hasn't. And I'll take questions on that later."

*maybe they're not even bisexual. Maybe they've had sex with men. Multiple, multiple men. Or maybe they haven't

"Sometimes things that are expensive are worse."

I also think we're 5 years away from bisexuality (at least bisexual women,) meaning 'likes to top.' Which is very frustrating considering non-binary doesn't signal things that are practically useful for me most of the time. I need my own fucking label like F1nn lol:

I wanted to ask for a bit of insight, though, as to what my (likely) bisexuality has to do with my interest in prostate play. It's my understanding that giving/receiving has nothing to do with sexual orientation, but I've seen a lot of comments and posts connecting the two (specifically regarding bi women). A lot of people on here have referenced their female partner's bisexuality to explain why she was open to the idea of pegging/prostate play, and I want to see the connection to better understand myself, but I'm failing to see it. Any insight would be greatly appreciated!

This is very annoying.

Even bisexual cis women get to be tops now!?

And I don't think any of these labels should = top or bottom for the record but it's like if it's going to read as something to people it would be ideal if it fit my preferences lol right?

Trans women will be happy. Trans masc people online can finally stop trying to get people to think they're trans women. No but lol.

I am bi. My wife is not. Like at all. She is very interested in my [BEEP] and pegging. I don't think there’s much of a connection there, except that some people associate dominant women with queerness?

None of this stuff is black and white. Sexuality is a journey and you sound pretty well equipped to figure yours out. Enjoy it!

Yeah that's a problem too.

[Nyctophilia]

Lol apparently shoeonhead was once invited to talk to Alex Jones and Tim Pool on his podcast but declined the offer because of her anxiety issues. Which I completely get but it would have been funny to see her talk to Alex Jones. I don't like Tim Pool though. I think he is neither entertaining not well informed he just occasionally comes out with completely ridiculous comments like wanting to legalise all nuclear weapons (edit: lol I mean he said he thinks everyone should be able to own a nuclear weapon,) or thinking women are bisexual because there are no masculine men around but otherwise a very boring not funny person.

I don't really like Alex Jones either tbh but at least he's very weird. I don't suppose talking to Alex Jones will really clue you in on whether he's actually mentally ill or grifting. I always assumed grifting but he tried to get out of the Sandy Hook claims thing in court by claiming to have been psychotic.

The conspiracy theorist Alex Jones blamed various claims he has made, including that the 2012 Sandy Hook elementary school shooting was a hoax, on "psychosis", according to a deposition given by the Infowars host as part of a Texas lawsuit.

Someone linked to this stream timestamped because she apparently brought up that F1nnister was her favourite femboy (not sure he still uses that label now,) and then she started talking about Alex Jones.

Edit: Watching the rest of this stream now and oh no she cheats while playing The Sims lol. She's surprised by people not cheating like 'why do you want to play a realistic game where you just go to work' yeah but like it's so easy as it is most of the time at least in later games. Managing motives in the sims 1 was a pain but in later games gets easier. So I like to make it challenging. If I'm actually playing and not just messing around/doing some random experiment anyway. Money cheats make it way too easy. I also enjoy making loads of money sometimes lol. I made a Sim where they start off homeless with 0 money then wanted to get them to be a millionaire. But I start new games a lot. I generally get bored around the time my Sim gets married and has a kid and start over. I've wanted to make like multi generation families but I rarely end up sticking with Sims for very long. Haven't even completed a legacy challenge I think the furthest I got was 7th gen one time.

I was doing this custom apocalypse challenge type thing a while back and got through multiple generations but I made it too difficult and it became depressing to play like many Sims dying of hunger lol and in this really bleak looking world too that I downloaded that was designed for zombie apocalypses intially it came with some skeletons but I removed them because it was freaking me out too much lol. Also I set it so it was in permanent winter (eventually I was supposed to 'unlock' seasons and other features but I never got to that point because I made it all too difficult lol. The Sims could only eat food their neighbours cooked autonomously which they often didn't - or they got from trash cans.) It barely felt like The Sims at that point it was like some kind of survival horror game. Then I got distracted with a new save and I dunno if I want to go back to it because I made so many rules it was hard to keep track of them all.

I'm reading comments on one of shoeonhead's videos.

The problem goes both ways and both sides make each other worse. Male douchebaggery is reaching new heights of cultish brain-dead fanaticism. Thinking that anyone under 6'7" is a sub-human manlet and that eating vegetables is an indication that you're gay, and on the other side the left is so frustrated and fed up with that bs that they've gone hyper-isolationist mode towards any form of masculinity that isn't explicitly contextualized by LGBT+ content.

Yeah. The bubble is cosy though besides the parts where there's just infighting/dumb discourse.

And tbh this has always just been my preference even before everyone went crazy online. Even before social media. I can connect to straight masculine characters in fiction sometimes but it's never really worked for me romantically/sexually and so I end up seeking out other stuff or interpreting things through a [BEEP] lens.

I'm pretty sure if I was a teenager/young adult in the 70s and 80s I would have somehow found a bunch of fanzines and would have been reading that stuff instead and/or into prog rock bands.

Tumblr literally just created their own universe. Where Taylor Swift is gay, Geddy Lee is a lesbian woman, everyone's a lesbian woman, everyone's also a gay man, everyone's bisexual, everyone's a goblin, most men are stick thin, being thin makes you a twink now, non twinks are father figures, furbies are long, and there's a fake [BEEP] mafia film directed by Martin Scorsese. Though tbf he said he created it so that's cannon now:

Martin Scorsese's daughter posted a video on TikTok of a text exchange with her father, in which she shared The New York Times' article on Goncharov and asked if he had seen it. Scorsese replied, "Yes. I made that film years ago."[15]

Tumblr is writing reality now.

Set in Naples in the aftermath of the dissolution of the Soviet Union, it is said to star Robert De Niro in the role of the protagonist, Lo Straniero, also known as Goncharov, who is a Russian hitman and former discotheque manager.[2][1] The narrative includes a love triangle subplot involving Goncharov, his wife Katya (said to be portrayed by Cybill Shepherd in the film's fictional cast), and his enemy Andrey (Harvey Keitel),[9] whose relationship with Goncharov is described as having homoerotic overtones.[10][1][11][4] Katya similarly absconds from Goncharov to engage in a romantically charged relationship with a woman named Sofia (Sophia Loren);[10][4][2] both Goncharov/Andrey and Katya/Sofia are popular ships within Goncharov's fandom.[7][4][11] Another prominent character is Joseph "Ice Pick Joe" Morelli (John Cazale), an ostensibly psychopathic assassin notorious for his trademark murder weapon of ice picks, whose subplot in Goncharov is said to feature themes of mental illness and childhood trauma.[8][1][7][12] The story additionally features a frequently recurring motif of clocks.[4][1][10] One version of the plot outlined by The Washington Post ends with Goncharov's murder after being betrayed, as well as the deaths of most of the other characters.[9]

Complex.

OK Gaylors aren't really a Tumblr thing but they're probably there anyway and it makes it funnier to me. I think Lana is bigger on Tumblr tbh. Patrick Bateman and Lana also exist in some weird universe together I haven't entirely figured it out. There are many subcultures on tumblr.

Patrick Bateman: Do you like Lana del Rey? I've been a big Lizzy Grant fan ever since the release of her 2012 album, Born to Die. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Born to Die where Lana's presence became more apparent. I think Video Games was the singer's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to National Anthem. In this song, Lana addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Off to the Races is the most moving pop song of the decade, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. [just realised the end of this gets more graphic probably shouldn't post that]

One of Tumblr's biggest fantasies now might be a psychopath in a suit written by a gay man (because of course,) screenplay written by a lesbian woman, talking about Lana Del Rey.

No it gets a lot worse of course.

Now I'm browsing cause I'm curious about actual fanfic scenarios people have come up with lol.

PAIRING: Patrick Bateman x Pregnant!Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: You and Patrick are engaged and about to become parents. One day, during a fancy party, you face the difficulties of being pregnant, as your changing body, affected by the hormones, hurts, but your future husband is always eager to help you.

That seems like something Patrick Bateman would do.

Your "slashers react to babygirlfication" post is hilarious, but I'm curious how'd they react to the number of fans who see them as father figures 🙌

Sorry u stinky men covered in blood. Ur a dad now. U cannot run, u cannot hide.

It's like that sort of thing, and then very graphic aggressive sex stuff and quite a bit of violence and gore. Two extremes.

I think of this as the feminine counterpart to the madonna/whore complex. Feminine not female because I don't think either complex is sex/gender exclusive.

Also sometimes the two get mixed together as well which is funny when you think about it symbolically. Some stuff I liked has mixed the two together thinking about it as well lol. Like converting soldiers to sluts. Voiced by a woman too (though it's about a man. It's hard to explain and I shouldn't. There's a lot going on here pov wise and I'm not even the target audience or enjoying it from the intended pov lol) We've transcended Freud now and I feel like this would give Jordan Peterson an aneurysm like with Frozen. 'It's breaking the archetypal rules' yeah well it gave me some orgasms. Sometimes you've got to break some eggs to make an omelette. The pun works too LOL.

Uh I really don't enjoy the use of the word mummy/daddy in a sexual context (or parental dynamics generally,) and honestly would prefer alternatives. It's now incredibly hard to escape. Sucks to be me.

There's a lot of Patrick Bateman with submissive female reader, but also some male reader, and also some Patrick Bateman/Paul Allen stuff.

We have some Hannibal and Patrick Bateman crossover stuff too of course.

This:

nymphet girlies who write self insert fanfic about patrick bateman being their d*ddy d*m sadist asshole boyfriend are fundamentally underutilizing fan fiction as a medium like I KNOW that's what he was like canonically but i have never in my life seen a character that so badly needs to be pegged a lil bit to calm them down

He actually was really freaked out by that one gay guy in the film so there's potential there too.

"Where are you going Patrick?"

He had a lot of video tapes to return.

And also one Patrick Bateman/Ben Shapiro fake tweet......

[graphic tweet I best not post.]

Someone needs to write a fanfic. Doesn't make sense bc they're both subs but I hate them so it's ok

I'm scared now honestly I'm leaving back to Geddy Lee is a lesbian tumblr.

No but I've read a bunch of fucked up things before lol. Like Hannibal/Clarice, Hannibal/Clarice/Will (actually though those fanfics weren't that fucked up especially sexually,) the AM/Ted fanfics from I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream. And the fanfics I don't even want to talk about during a couple of months or so period when I was 20.

At a certain point I ended up in in the Saw fandom tags on Tumblr (I mean while searching now lol) and there were many posts about Amanda Young.



Also some post about Harry Styles comparing him to Patrick Bateman because of some song lyrics he wrote, and talking about ask blogs and signs that teenagers had at concerts. Won't quote everything they said but:

I don't read any fanfic and am allergic to those head canon ask blogs, but some of the signs at Harry's American shows like "punch me in the face" or whatever were enough to disturb me.

It's very unsexy to me. Like if someone said that to me I'd just feel nothing and if they said they wanted to punch me in the face I'd either feel nothing or leave the environment lol depending on how serious I though they were. So it's interesting that it's become so popular.

Reminds me of the Mean Girls trailer (this is pg-13 btw):



"We'll begin with abstinence, of course then followed by condoms, and choking"

"You're learning things now that I don't know how to teach."

That's a pretty catchy song.



It's kind of clever I guess. I want to get him back vs I want to get him back.

But I am my father's daughter, so maybe I could fix him

I'm explaining the obvious joke.

I mean I do kind of get it because again this is hot:



Waiting to be disciplined

Aching for your nails across my skin

Waiting for the day when I will crawl away

Damn I forgot how hot that was again. And I know it wasn't supposed to be. That's never the point and his songs are rarely even from his pov. I don't know what this song is about but half the time they're about serial killers or some mentally ill stalkers etc. Which makes this funny.

And Loki getting chucked around in MCU films was kind of hot. And this is kind of hot especially the scene where the female character whose name I forgot comes into the room and pushes him onto the bed (is that a bed? Let's say it's a bed. I have watched this show I just don't remember):



But that's about it.

OK maybe I'm sort of sadistic and voyeuristic. Well obviously but my kinks are pretty removed from this conventional physical expression typically. I like more psychological stuff.

I still don't get why someone telling you they want you to punch them in the face/choke them is supposed to be hot. And it's just everywhere.

literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified 'that girl' in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

You're not wrong honestly.

There's always at least one post about how everyone who thinks he's this sigma badass is missing the point and that he's actually a loser.

No I just relate to the scene where he's monologuing about music tbh.

[Nyctophilia]

I always thought Vampire Weekend were some 80s band or something but apparently they formed in the 2000s.

I also have this impression (not sure where from) that they have a cool name but unfortunately not as cool music. I sort of want them to be a goth rock band and they're obviously not that.

Still managed to never listen to any of their music. I think. Or maybe did hear one song once (which led to the vibes of disappointment I have in my memory.) Maybe on some radio channel in the late 2000s. Who knows.

There's a song I thought I liked maybe by them but I don't remember it or the title lol. Not helpful. Oh it is by them yes. Vaguely like The Police mixed with Foster The People or something. I liked the lyrics.



They're playing at the radio 1 thing that's surprisingly happening in Luton this weekend. I decided not to go because I hadn't heard of most of the lineup or wasn't fussed.

Charlie xcx is huge and playing and has a couple of songs I like that are older and back when she was doing witchhouse-adj stuff:





I also thought her track with Iggy Azalea Fancy was pretty catchy but not fussed about her poppier stuff I've heard.

Rag'n'Bone Man is playing and I like the track Human can't remember if I've heard anything else by him.

Obviously Coldplay are kind of the big deal here but I'm not super into them either. Not enough to go see them at a large outdoor gig. It's like great background music for a TV show occassionally or something.

So yeah shame but just wasn't that fussed. Would have been awesome if it was a bunch of older rock bands from all over or even acts like Ethel Cain, Florence and the Machine etc. But I've not heard of most of these acts or I'm not fussed .

Maybe I'll regret this if I listen to (more of) Vampire Weekend later? Probably not though since I can always check them out on some other tour if I decide to.

I mean tickets sold out ages ago and I decided not to go then lol but yeah it's frustrating because Luton doesnt get big music events/concerts (at least in recent decades,) and the lineup wasn't my thing

'Oh i'll go to this for cultural/memory reasons'

But no I won't lol. There's another concert I want to go to and now have to buy some new PC parts because my psu decided to stop powering my GPU (will prob have to replace GPU soon too. GPU is a decade old now anyway.)

[Nyctophilia]

I'm reading more of this book again. Read two or so pages already distracted and felt like posting again. It's not an ebook either, so I can't highlight bits for later lol without damaging the real life book.

I don't know much about anything.

There are people that know a lot about one thing. Like they know everything there is to know about it. These people are amazing, and essential when you need to know something about that one thing for a brief moment in your life, like how to put it together, repair it, or what the best version of it might be. After that you can generally forget all about it again. But these people go on, finding joy in knowing in intimate detail everything there is to know about how to replace a spark plug in a car, or the best time of year to plant a tomatoes. You know useful stuff.

I admire that commitment to something so microcosmic.

Oh not necessarily useful to others. They're calIed 'special interests.' I know a lot about sexology and gender and can talk about it endlessly, but this has little practical use especially given the taboo and backlash to discussion about it.

The truth is I was too lazy to learn anything properly.

With something new the first thing I do is ignore the manual and just start fiddling. Or learn just enough to be able to do what I want with it.

Lol 'lazy' as a self descriptor is surprising to hear from someone who is constantly working on music. But yeah I prefer to figure stuff out too and find other forms of learning boring. Unfortunately I'm not good at figuring stuff out either.

The one thing I feel I do know a lot about, however, is me.

Many of my most ardent followers dive deep into the music and come back with all sorts of assertions about me, but I generally don't recognise these versions of me. They are based mainly on what they can figure out from the lyrics and songs (and that's a whole other can of worms)

Yeah I assumed most of them weren't about him in the first place lol.

There are also a lot of interviews out there, written, recorded and filmed. But I lie a lot in interviews. Most people do. When you're talking to a hundred different people to promote the same thing, you end up making up all sorts of shit, partly just to relieve the boredom, but also because the reality is often just not that interesting.

Interesting.

The interviews become as much a part of the creative artifice as the music; in fact, there might even be more about the real me in the songs I write about fictional characters in imaginary situations, than there is in all the interviews where I'm supposedly talking about my actual life.

Darn now I really want to know the meaning of the song Waiting (Phase One.)

Which lies did I tell? There will probably be some in this book, too.

Noooo lol.

How did I manage to attract such obsessive and fanatical fans, many of whom take everything I say or do very personally, which is simultaneously flattering but can also be tremendously frustrating?

Probably this:

I had none of the usual music business stuff to draw on: failed marriages, drug addictions, the big pop success followed by the crash back down to Earth.

The 'just a guy making great music' thing makes it easier to relate.