Otherside
Dear The idiots who got voted into the government,
It is nice to see that you understand that disability can be mental instead of just physical. I'm glad to see that one of the prime ministers aides believes that "disability payments should go to the truly disabled, not those who sit at home and take pills with anxiety." I'm also glad that he has some grand insight into this because he has "previously suffered from anxiety and depression", and therefore, nobody can comment on what he said or say that he's wrong.
Perhaps I should make my case as to why I consider my mental illness to be a disability. You see, I appreciate that it's episodal. I appreciate that it fluctuates. I am not sick all the time.
When I get depressed, I do not get out of bed for anything. I mean literally anything. I will not get out of bed to use the toilets. I will not wash, or shower. I will not move. I begin to loose weight because I'm forgetting to eat. If nobody tells me to eat, I won't do it because I do not feel hungry and nothing in my brain is telling me to eat. When I do remember I need to eat, I'll eat very little. There's no appetite whatsoever. I'm lucky if I even have the motivation to make something to eat. It's just not there. Clothes won't get washed for weeks. Bins won't be empty and they'll be overflowing. At the worst, I started to believe I could hear people's thoughts, and that they were coming to kill me. I cannot be left with my pills because I will most likely overdose on them. My parents have to look them away. And If I do have them and I'm not OD'ing...I'm forgetting to take them and my condition is getting worse. If I'm manic, I start to spend and I cannot stop. My bank account will be empty within the day, every single bit of money spent on some useless crap. I don't sleep, I can't focus, everything is irritating me. I can't stand the sound of people breathing. I'm the most irrate, paranoid, angry person you could come across.
On the side of anxiety - I'll turn up to bus stops an hour before my bus is due to go and still worry that I have missed the bus. I'll spend half an hour dealing with a panic attack, unable to breathe or think properly. My heart pounds uncomfortably most of the night, keeping me awake. I've spend the last decade dealing with it, being in and out of treatment for it.
And when it comes to those pills...I hate them, but I don't have a choice except to take them. I've been shaking for the last four years, thanks to the Valproate. I failed a driving test because it's bad enough that I can't control a clutch. I can't write because of the tremors in my hands. I feel the tremoring at night, I can feel the tremoring now.
So yes, you do need a lecture on how "anxiety and depression can ruin someones life". Although I'm certainly glad to hear that you had a mild case of it that makes you think that the condition can do very little damage.
Yours Sincerly,
Otherside.
PS - Insensitive Prick. If I was to say what you said at work, you can bet your [BEEP] I'd be up in front of a disciplinary for insensitivity, and I would be lucky to keep my job. But I suspect that you will not only keep yours, but it will soon emerge that you "didn't mean to say it!" and what you actually meant was something entirely different, although it is as clear as day as to what you meant. I also imagine you'll keep your cushy, ?70,000 job which comes with a second house paid by the taxpayer, travel expenses, and a free ?30 breakfast every morning.
And no thinking about dying!
Socially inept Koala
Consumer of Coffee
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