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  1. #1
    Chieve's Avatar
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    I never realized how many trolls there are on SAS

    I don't know if the people who were reading one of my threads on SAS are stupid or trolling, but I emphasized so many times on that site that I didn't care about not being able to do this or that, but it's my moms unnecessary attitudes I get all the time.

    I sent my mom an email going to Niagara falls as a bike trip, and mentioning how I found it to be a much cheaper alternative than australia(not going there obviously I can't afford it, I wasn't going anyways, its just something I always wanted to do and it's something I would like to save up for one day), and how my mom ends up replying "if you can afford a trip to australia you would be able to afford a car, lets get our priorities straight" and she's talking about the past, before I got in an accident...not present. but i found it unnecessary. Again it's not about the car, the trip to Niagara Falls or Australia(I didn't plan to go I can't afford), but it's just when she gives me an attitude for no reason.

    And then people keep on turning it around saying stuff like talk about first world problems and how I shouldn't be complaining because there are kids with much worse. when I'm older I can go on a trip to australia.

    I emphasized so many times it's not about the trip, it wasn't even about the trip in the first place, it wasn't about a trip to australia (because I wasnt asking her if I can go there) it wasnt about the bike trip to Niagara falls, and it's not about the car. I mean, it's somewhat about the car to be honest. I got mad because she gives me an attitude all the time when ever I try to talk about a 2nd car and then she says some like before like if i had the money, we would get a car anyways. Yet when I am willing to take out a loan or something, she gets all mad.

    I just hate it when she gives me an attitude, that's what it's mainly about, her attitudes and I wish I could talk to her about some things without getting one back.

    This may not be a very good example of her attitude, I have a better one.

    I would love to learn how to fly. before I got in an accident, my mom told me I should go to her college and try taking flying lessons at the college she goes too because it's offered there. a few months later I ask her how much does it cost to get flying lessons there, she says "I don't know, but seeing how you drive, I don't think you should be taking flying lessons."

    Like that's what I am talking about, her attitudes, like that last comment wasn't necessary. The response before wasn't necessary either, I was simply stating it to be a cheaper alternative, and she says that. I know why she did it.

    And yeah I know my mom isn't that bad, but her attitudes really get to me.

    Yet people on SAS start turning things around like I'm complaining that I can't go to Australia when I didn't even mention about going there in the first place, besides when I said it is a cheaper alternative when I wanted to go in the past. That's the only time it was ever brought up.

    edit:
    I made a draft on SAS asking if they think I should send it.

    but i guess MAYBE, if I were to give any of them the benefit of the doubt, maybe it was confusing and hard to understand.

    and they didn't get why i was mad.

    I cant see why because i was indirectly fighting her back. i complained about the car, yes, which is why I don't think it's a good example, because I think that is more understandable. But i still find her attitudes unnecessary.

    Maybe all I should really say is

    "I just want to let you know I am getting sick of your attitudes. Maybe this time it was understandable, but many times in the past, it wasn't, and it really isn't necessary. You know when you said you didn't think I should get a pilots license judging by the way I drive, yeah well I didn't find that funny at all. It actually really hurt my feelings and pissed me off most of the day."

  2. #2
    Otherside's Avatar
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    Yeah, there's a lot of pricks on SAS and I can't spend more than a couple of minutes or so on there at times without running into someone who makes me grit my teeth and want to throw something. That site has grown too large for it's own good, and a lot of people on there are convinced that everyone on there has 1)never had sex and is on there because they need help to have sex on the sex-partner avoidance support site, or whatver 2) Is a teenager, and they'll just "get over it". I haven't felt comfortable there saying what is going on in my life, or my issues for a long time. It's a shame really. Seems to me that they all just want to prove to the world how [BEEP] the world treats them and they have some uncurable life threatening disease, anyone who doesn't think like that "doesn't know what it's like"...and it just makes me so mad, over there. I've had some serious problems and I've been in hospital, and to be told I "don't know what anxiety is like" or what "depression is like" annoys the crap outta me, and isn't very nice.

    Anyway, sorry, turned into a rant of my own. I find it best to avoid that place, it's not really that great a support site and it doesn't make you feel any better in the long run. As for your Mum...have you tried talking to her about this? Seems to be like she can't get over something with what happened with your car accident. If it's been going for a while, you might want to spell it to her. You aren't gonna like this, but tell her that whatever her problem is, she needs to get it out, deal with it, and stop giving you shit.

    Edit: Yer, what you're sending is good. I might add something at the end "If you have some sort of problem with me, then I'd rather you said it." or something like that. If she has a problem with you for whatever reason, it's best to talk about it, really.
    I'M GONNA FIGHT 'EM ALL
    A SEVEN NATION ARMY COULDN'T HOLD ME BACK.......


  3. #3
    Antidote's Avatar Rude & Shouty
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    Yeah I don't reveal too much about my life there. No one can be trusted. I've had someone monitor my activity / posts / VMs, make assumptions about it and then try to use that information against me. I've also been personally attacked on multiple occasions. I've been taken to a state where I was angry for months on there. I also regularly see people trolling and blaming others for being socially anxious, implying they're weak and cowardly. If I were you I'd not even post anything. They're not really worth the waste in time. But if you feel compelled you can defend yourself and write that post. I can guarantee, you'll get some smart @ss ignorant moron answering back though.

  4. #4
    Otherside's Avatar
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    Quote Antidote View Post
    Yeah I don't reveal too much about my life there. No one can be trusted. I've had someone monitor my activity / posts / VMs, make assumptions about it and then try to use that information against me. I've also been personally attacked on multiple occasions. I've been taken to a state where I was angry for months on there. I also regularly see people trolling and blaming others for being socially anxious, implying they're weak and cowardly. If I were you I'd not even post anything. They're not really worth the waste in time. But if you feel compelled you can defend yourself and write that post. I can guarantee, you'll get some smart @ss ignorant moron answering back though.
    Wow, that's horrible! I wouldn't answer the post, I agree with antidote, just report any of the assholes on there, and leave it. The mods will eventually get round to sorting it. Hopefully. There's only one of them at the mo. Even the mods have made a bit of a run for it. =/

    Antidote, the bit in bold, I heard tehuti saying someone was doing something like that to her, making comments about her in the "whats bothering you" and "unpopular opinions thread" all because she was too anxious to reply to somebodies PM. That person even impersonated her and made a duplicate account and made some not so nice posts on it. It's horrible that that goes on. She's even said she knows that she not the only one who said person has done this too, and it's a regular poster. I know who it is, I think.

    It's not a nice place over there. I'm constantly paranoid and searching "Otherside" to see if anyones said anything. So far, not yet.

    Edit-Wow, stay away from that place.



    (And I very much doubt the bath salts are the stuff that you put in your bathwater to make it smell nice)
    I'M GONNA FIGHT 'EM ALL
    A SEVEN NATION ARMY COULDN'T HOLD ME BACK.......


  5. #5
    Evo1114's Avatar
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    Yeah, I will probably still go on there because I have a couple (2) friends I talk to over there. But man oh man. Every thread either turns into a trolling thread or a 'funny' gif thread. I very rarely see a thread full of serious responses. EVERYTHING gets derailed.

    No offense to anybody HERE, but I think the main problem is that it has become heavily overrun with teenagers. Many of whom THINK they have social anxiety but they really don't. If I want advice on something, as a 33-year old, I'd rather somebody with a little more experience give their input than some 19 year old trying to be funny with a stupid gif. With that being said, I rarely ask for advice with anything. I offer advice all the time and it quickly gets buried and I highly doubt it ever even gets noticed. Some people post so much nonsense that I don't understand how it is even possible for them to have social anxiety. They are just there to be 'popular' because they are probably incredibly annoying in real life...I don't get how so many people fall for that either.

    Edit: I just want to be clear, I'm not saying that ALL younger people are this way. There are probably more younger people than not on there that I consider to be sincere, it's just that the largest portion of annoying people are around that age range.

  6. #6
    Fizzy Doom's Avatar
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    Quote Evo1114 View Post
    Yeah, I will probably still go on there because I have a couple (2) friends I talk to over there. But man oh man. Every thread either turns into a trolling thread or a 'funny' gif thread. I very rarely see a thread full of serious responses. EVERYTHING gets derailed.

    No offense to anybody HERE, but I think the main problem is that it has become heavily overrun with teenagers. Many of whom THINK they have social anxiety but they really don't. If I want advice on something, as a 33-year old, I'd rather somebody with a little more experience give their input than some 19 year old trying to be funny with a stupid gif. With that being said, I rarely ask for advice with anything. I offer advice all the time and it quickly gets buried and I highly doubt it ever even gets noticed. Some people post so much nonsense that I don't understand how it is even possible for them to have social anxiety. They are just there to be 'popular' because they are probably incredibly annoying in real life...I don't get how so many people fall for that either.

    Edit: I just want to be clear, I'm not saying that ALL younger people are this way. There are probably more younger people than not on there that I consider to be sincere, it's just that the largest portion of annoying people are around that age range.

    You should invite them over here via PM.

  7. #7
    Hitgirl's Avatar
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    No shit. And the thing is, they ban people for the oddest things. If I didn't know any better I'd say they were just trying to spare server space, but I'm not one to speculate

  8. #8
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    Quote Chieve View Post

    Maybe all I should really say is

    "I just want to let you know I am getting sick of your attitudes. Maybe this time it was understandable, but many times in the past, it wasn't, and it really isn't necessary. You know when you said you didn't think I should get a pilots license judging by the way I drive, yeah well I didn't find that funny at all. It actually really hurt my feelings and pissed me off most of the day."
    I think this is being honest and straight forward. Telling someone that they hurt you is probably the best way to handle hurt. It gets it out in the open. I know so many people who instead of just saying those words will retaliate with passive aggressiveness, bitterness and "troll-like" behavior.

    Attitudes do hurt. And it does hurt worse, when others don't understand what you're trying to say.

    I think you're on the right track by talking to others and to your mother. Just find people who honestly care about you. That means finding out where your support and friends are.

    As for "the other place" I found friends there, but the ones who really matter, have come here. I tend to stay here and not go other places, because when I struggle as it sounds you're doing right now...............well, I want to have friends around to support and encourage me.

    That's what I get here.
    The Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about

  9. #9
    Hitgirl's Avatar
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    Oh and I want to add this: There's a way to deal with trolls and flamers on that site. Just stand your ground and show them you're not bothered by what they're doing. They'll back off if you show you'll go toe to toe and won't take they're BS. You may get your account flagged with that personal attacks rule, but you have to do what to do.

    Alot of people troll there because they know SA suffers tend to be on the sensitive side as well. I got this douche named "random man" banned for just being pure flamer. That's a good thing about the site, if they see someone fucking about like that, they'll just ban him outright. But it doesn't sound like you had real trolls, unsympathetic d~bags, and sometimes, that's much worse because it isn't bannable.

    That's just my extra 2 cents.

  10. #10
    compulsive's Avatar
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    About the car anyway, you really need to make a budget and plan what will my monthly payments be if I buy a car at an estimated $xx and an interest rate of? xxx.
    How much of a loan could I afford?

    There are great online calculators you can use for loans. Rather than doing it yourself. Just find the banks interest rate, the amount and plug it in the calculator online. Perhaps your bank even has a loan calculator.

    Are you working now? Because you would need a job for the bank to accept a loan application.

    The only way you will convince your mom about a loan is :

    - insurance plan
    - budget plan for car loan

  11. #11
    Chieve's Avatar
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    Sorry I don't know how to quote by phone, but yeah, there are. I know mines not serious but I definitely noticed that more serious issues at pushes aside while the silly ones aren't. I mean, I would consider mine kind of silly, but i just wanted to vent.

    And yeah thanks all, yeah ill try been more direct next time, attitudes get to me...and I should be more direct then fight with her on something I don't really care about.

    The only reason ill argue back is because i don't want my posts to be misinterpreted because people tried to troll my post...ill admit it was a long most and I could see others reading the response if they wanted to help...

    That's crazy someone actually stalked you. I heard that happened to another member too, I can't believe there are actually people like that on that site.

  12. #12
    Antidote's Avatar Rude & Shouty
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    Quote Otherside View Post
    Wow, that's horrible! I wouldn't answer the post, I agree with antidote, just report any of the assholes on there, and leave it. The mods will eventually get round to sorting it. Hopefully. There's only one of them at the mo. Even the mods have made a bit of a run for it. =/

    Antidote, the bit in bold, I heard tehuti saying someone was doing something like that to her, making comments about her in the "whats bothering you" and "unpopular opinions thread" all because she was too anxious to reply to somebodies PM. That person even impersonated her and made a duplicate account and made some not so nice posts on it. It's horrible that that goes on. She's even said she knows that she not the only one who said person has done this too, and it's a regular poster. I know who it is, I think.
    Yes I read about that too. I didn't know this user also made a duplicate account just to harass her though. Everyone who gave me a hard time were people I knew well so it was a different situation for me. I gave them a hard time too because I felt affronted and I didn't want to feel like I was walking on eggshells for fear of what they may think. So I adopted a rule with myself to put my comfort first, and to ignore them and post like they're not even there. I still have upscaled my privacy though because most people don't deserve to know much about my life. I had to learn that the hard way because by default I'm too trusting and don't anticipate people turning on me.

    Quote Evo1114 View Post
    Yeah, I will probably still go on there because I have a couple (2) friends I talk to over there. But man oh man. Every thread either turns into a trolling thread or a 'funny' gif thread. I very rarely see a thread full of serious responses.
    I am SO sick of the obnoxious, mocking gifs.

  13. #13
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    SAS is trolled on a regular basis by women haters and people whose intention is to upset people, bully people and make other people feel as bad as they feel.

    I see no evidence that the mods on SAS receive any support from admin which makes policing the trolls hard. It's not just a few trolls over on SAS. There are communities of trolls who actively and deliberately attack SAS on a regular basis.

    I would strongly advise members of this site to be very careful on SAS and not take any "odd" replies that they might get to their posts seriously. Should you feel you are being trolled on SAS, let their admins and mods know and, if necessary, leave SAS.

    It annoys me that people who need support for their efforts to overcome their anxiety are instead getting this trolling crap on SAS.

  14. #14
    Hitgirl's Avatar
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    Quote takethebiscuit View Post
    SAS is trolled on a regular basis by women haters and people whose intention is to upset people, bully people and make other people feel as bad as they feel.

    I see no evidence that the mods on SAS receive any support from admin which makes policing the trolls hard. It's not just a few trolls over on SAS. There are communities of trolls who actively and deliberately attack SAS on a regular basis.

    I would strongly advise members of this site to be very careful on SAS and not take any "odd" replies that they might get to their posts seriously. Should you feel you are being trolled on SAS, let their admins and mods know and, if necessary, leave SAS.

    It annoys me that people who need support for their efforts to overcome their anxiety are instead getting this trolling crap on SAS.
    Yeah I could probably make a list of the major trolls on that site, but I'd rather not.

    The main thing is, that site is just plain depressing sometimes. One of the suicide threads posted there actually gave me a nightmare. That was another reason for my ban. SAS was a good idea, but some people just abusing it. And on another note, I saw one of the better mods left saying "I'm done with SAS". Very dissapointing. I can't imagine how that site will function with only two mods, but that's their problem, not mines I guess.

  15. #15
    Evo1114's Avatar
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    Agree with the above.

    I don't really need too much help with anything, but if I ever did need any help, I certainly wouldn't bother asking for it over there. I have a friend on there who asked a legitimate question about something she was feeling incredibly anxious about and out of about 20 responses, maybe 2 were not sarcastic. I think the female posters are treated horrendously over there. I don't know if they need a female mod over there or what could be done.

    I think it is more of a website to try and become popular than it is to actually find assistance and to assist others in need. Yesterday there was this joke thread praising a user over there...I made a sarcastic joke going against the grain and I got jumped on by everybody. Lol. Since I'm not part of the clique, I guess I wasn't allowed to make a joke. ??? If people feel the need to advertise themselves with thread after thread seeking attention, they damn well better be prepared for some detractors...even though I was joking. If you aren't part of that teenage clique over there, you better not even bother posting. I'll still try and help people...I know there are definitely some people who are genuinely on there to seek help and I'll continue to try and help where I can.

    It's sad that you could have somebody who is suicidal because of their struggles and then have this large troll clique with these joke responses or putting the poster down. Besides, you know not everybody will come out and say 'I'm thinking of killing myself', but you kind of have to think that people might feel that way if they don't get the help that they came on such a website for.

    What kind of person is somebody to troll people on a mental help forum anyways? Yikes.

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