Ok, I'm not too sure how to say this, but something horrible happened to me tonight.
I'm not one to be bothered by much, but man this took the cake...
I had a very terrifying experience. I can't talk about it. I wish I could, but I hope like hell that
my mind somehow blocks it out for good.
It affected me so badly that I've been sitting up all night. Dunno if I'll sleep for weeks! I was in a state of pure terror; I couldn't sit still I couldn't pace about I wanted to run far away. Curtis had gone to bed not long before, so I was alone. I called someone for help and for the
1st little while they could not calm me. I was having INTENSE bouts of sheer panic, and as I write this I am so afraid I'll lose control of
myself again, tho I'm feeling better'ish now. I did wake Curt up at one point it got too much and boy was he unhappy. He didn't know what happened so he didn't understand.
I'm still in shock...
I dunno how to cope with this, maybe there's no way but I feel like I have nothing better to do than vent here at least.
To top all of it off I'm still sick with flu, pretty badly I might add, and can't get any sleep cuz all I can do is sit here in the living room with the TV on. Funny that I was completely unable to pick up my laptop....
It's getting light out....I think I should go out for a walk to clear my head up a bit. Fuckin' hell, man....... >__<