So, what has got me bothered?
My meds. Proazc is supposed to be helping my anxiety according to my useless PDoc who seems to have informed me of a divorce that supposedly happened in my childhood that I don't remember occuring, but all it seems to be doing is making my mood flick up and down several times a bloody day. And people who expect me to give them a whole list of dosages of what meds I take and when. Why do people expect this? That's something I'm not comfortable giving! I don't like informing people of what meds I'm on if I can help it. Maybe that's just me. But some of them...I don't like to admit that I'm taking crazypills along with how much I'm taking and what my treatment plan is. Hey, maybe I'll post that on Facebpook as well! So in the morning I take this, this and this...
And then people who tell me I don't need meds. "Oh I had depression and I took the meds for three days and it did nothing and I just decided to stop feeling sorry for myself". I wanted to punch that person. Of course I'm choosing to feel depressed. It's a fucking blast. Or the religious pricks who came to my door last night and tried to convince me of the evils of modern medicine. Which pisses me off. Mental illness meds aside, my sister takes meds for rheumatoid arthiritus. My Grandfather gets injections every few months to shrink a cancer growth. There's a history of diabetes type II in my family and I am well aware that the majority of them use "modern medicine" to control that. Seriously. I just want to scream at these people. I really do. I have tolerance for religion, I really do. That just ends when someone tries to shove there beliefs down my throat. And even then, it's more that I'm pissed off at the person, not the religion. And it always amazes me that the majority of people who go on and on and on about the evils of medication or how we can't use it because animals were harmed in the process of making it, usually have never had much other than the common cold. Which you never really need to take medication for anyways!
Or the number of people that seem to have decided that after watching "Don't call me crazy", being inside an adolescent psychiatric ward is absolutley fucking fun and would give them a nice break from school. Which makes me want to scream. Do any of them have any idea how bad things generally get before they admit you to hospital? Or do you seriosuly have this deluded idea that it's totally a blast when you're stuck in one and we're all throwing parties whilst you're all on the outside missing out and all these totally fun things we are doing whilst trapped inside the bloody hospital and unable to leave. Emphasis on the "can't leave". Even when you're there voluntarily, you still get the feeling of being trapped.
If anything, it's just boring. Whereever did the idea that it was "fun" come from?