I know this is my job, but whenever I have to run a big program like I have to do today, I get so anxious. I had one hour sleep. I have an interview, and a day long program that involves not only over 100 teens, but the entire community. Why am I in such a public job?
Things that go through my head:
I won't remember everything I need to do.
I'll sound stupid.
Something will go wrong
Nobody will show up
Did I set everything up right or did I forget something?
What if people hate it?
I have so much other stuff to do and I'm not remembering to get it done
Will people be bored?
This isn't going to work
Why can't I have the confidence I used to have?
Yes, I used to get nervous, but not like this.
Before I didn't even think about it............I just did it with no feelings.
Or maybe I did have feelings, but I stuffed them inside.
I just know that putting on these monthly programs is getting harder and harder to do.
Does anybody do this? Tell themselves horrible things before doing something? Is anybody else afraid of being a failure?