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  1. #1
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    I hate my college.

    I'm at a 2 year college right now. 1st semester is almost over. I haven't made any friends at all, can't go up and talk to people. I can't join clubs because I have a fear of being rejected by people. People think I don't exist and I feel like someone is spreading a rumor about me. I knew I chose the wrong college to begin with. I just wish that next time, I'll make the right choices. I mean I could've been at a 4 year university living in a dorm right now. But I don't know, people have already made their friendships except me. I still feel like it's too late to start over again and make new friends. I know people are never gonna like me at all, I can guarantee it. I haven't seen any loners sitting around not doing anything on campus. The only loner I see around campus is myself.

  2. #2
    L's Avatar
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    Can you read minds?
    life---> <---me

  3. #3
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    Quote lasair View Post
    Can you read minds?
    What do you mean by that?

  4. #4
    L's Avatar
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    Well you have already formulated in your mind that people will not like you, what proof have you? How do you know this?
    life---> <---me

  5. #5
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    Quote lasair View Post
    Well you have already formulated in your mind that people will not like you, what proof have you? How do you know this?
    Because people aren't gonna talk to me, they'll think I'm weird/awkward.

  6. #6
    L's Avatar
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    Look at your body language, does it imply that you want someone to approach you. I know its not easy, but you need to send out the message that you want people to talk to you also meet people half way you might have to be the first to talk.
    life---> <---me

  7. #7
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    Quote lasair View Post
    Look at your body language, does it imply that you want someone to approach you. I know its not easy, but you need to send out the message that you want people to talk to you also meet people half way you might have to be the first to talk.
    I've been waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to approach me, but no one has done that for the past 3 months.

  8. #8
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    Can't always wait. You have to approach too. Think that the type of person you connect with may find it just as hard....
    life---> <---me

  9. #9
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    Quote lasair View Post
    Can't always wait. You have to approach too. Think that the type of person you connect with may find it just as hard....
    I'm afraid to approach people I don't even know. If I do, they'll think I'm being awkward. I'm not cool enough like those other kids.

  10. #10
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    I feel you on this.

    I believe I have a mild-moderate case of social anxiety. I have always been quiet most of my student career, and some people have even bestowed the title of "Silent Girl" on me. I've always been silent because judgement is my worst fear. I always over analyze things and thing everything that I want to say never is said because I'm terrified of how people will respond. They might not say it aloud but they will definitely mentally judge me. It has gotten worse because I'm a freshman in college now. I feel like everyone in my class has an opinion that seems so intelligent to add in while I just don't even try to formulate an opinion because I believe that it'll just be stupid anyways. I fear getting into small groups as well because then they expect you to voice an opinion, and if you don't I feel as if my classmates are classifying me as an incompetent fool. During breaks I spend most of my time in the bathroom so I won't have to deal with any social interaction. I hate being like this.

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    Quote Boots View Post
    I feel you on this.

    I believe I have a mild-moderate case of social anxiety. I have always been quiet most of my student career, and some people have even bestowed the title of "Silent Girl" on me. I've always been silent because judgement is my worst fear. I always over analyze things and thing everything that I want to say never is said because I'm terrified of how people will respond. They might not say it aloud but they will definitely mentally judge me. It has gotten worse because I'm a freshman in college now. I feel like everyone in my class has an opinion that seems so intelligent to add in while I just don't even try to formulate an opinion because I believe that it'll just be stupid anyways. I fear getting into small groups as well because then they expect you to voice an opinion, and if you don't I feel as if my classmates are classifying me as an incompetent fool. During breaks I spend most of my time in the bathroom so I won't have to deal with any social interaction. I hate being like this.
    I don't like being in group work in class, because no one in the group talks to me.

  12. #12
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    I'm also in a 2 year community college, and from my experience, people are for the most part busy with themselves and just getting the necessary work done. Not everyone goes there with the mindset of meeting new friends. So, if you want to get someone's attention and try to socialize, you have to attempt to do the approaching yourself. You can't assume that no one likes you - how can they not like you if they never met you or talked with you before?

    When it comes to working in a group, you can't wait for someone to address you. Try your best to just speak up in the group and join the conversation. If you don't say anything, the group might just assume that you don't want to talk, that you just prefer to sit back and listen. I never talked to anyone in college, nor did I voluntarily speak up in groups. But in my case, I didn't want to make friends at that time - but if you want to make friends, you have to try to take the initiative on yourself. And believe me I understand how hard that is, my social phobia used to be incredibly severe. But I'm just saying that, speaking up is really the only way to accomplish this, it's how everyone does it that doesn't have SA, it just comes naturally to them. But for us, we need to extend the effort.

  13. #13
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    I'm in a 3 year community college.

    What always makes me drop the ball, is not how hard the work is. It's always the fact that I am expected to be social, and then I get judged. I once made a friend, one friend, and then everyone else questioned why I was friends with this girl...and I had to defend both her and me, at the same time.

    I can't relate to most college students. They are still the atmosphere of "I don't care, let's party", and they call me the modern interpretation of a square for not wanting to do that. I actually hate beer now, and don't drink it. I have partied before, been drunk before, and no longer see the appeal in it. I just want coffee and a book. I actually find I enjoy studying, but I want people to do it with, and they want to socialize.

  14. #14
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    Quote Monroe View Post
    I'm also in a 2 year community college, and from my experience, people are for the most part busy with themselves and just getting the necessary work done. Not everyone goes there with the mindset of meeting new friends. So, if you want to get someone's attention and try to socialize, you have to attempt to do the approaching yourself. You can't assume that no one likes you - how can they not like you if they never met you or talked with you before?

    When it comes to working in a group, you can't wait for someone to address you. Try your best to just speak up in the group and join the conversation. If you don't say anything, the group might just assume that you don't want to talk, that you just prefer to sit back and listen. I never talked to anyone in college, nor did I voluntarily speak up in groups. But in my case, I didn't want to make friends at that time - but if you want to make friends, you have to try to take the initiative on yourself. And believe me I understand how hard that is, my social phobia used to be incredibly severe. But I'm just saying that, speaking up is really the only way to accomplish this, it's how everyone does it that doesn't have SA, it just comes naturally to them. But for us, we need to extend the effort.
    For that question. Because seeing new faces scare me a lot.

  15. #15
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    How you think determines how you feel. You should ask people in your classes if they want to meet and study and then go get something to eat. Let school be the ice breaker.

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