I believe in God. I feel I have a very strong faith in God. I go to a program called Celebrate Recovery which is a 12 step program based on God at a church. This program helped me the first time I took it and it's helping me again.
I even like to go to church sometimes to listen to sermons.
So why am I afraid of church people?
I have a few clues:
I've seen a lot of people who push religion, but act very mean and nasty in their daily life
I feel like I'm being judged even if I'm not
I feel they want to be my friend too fast and it scares me
I know that I'm judging right now and that makes me mad at me. I know that I'm letting a few people dictate my view of "all" religious people when I even have proof of some really great friends who happen to go to church regularly.
I just wish I could get over my fear. The times that I've gotten close to religious people, it's been great and I've made lasting friends.
I'm just really scared about getting to know these religious people at my Celebrate Recovery group. It's like the minute they start quoting scripture or smile at me as though they "must do that" I get freaked. I know that's in my head though and they're not doing anything weird.
Anybody else have a fear of church people? Would you like to share?
(oh, and I'm not looking for a debate about whether there's a God or not here. Just wondering how other people feel about going to an organized church and how they get over the fear of being there with the other people. It would help to get some perspective here)
Thanks,
Cindy