Random Thought of the Day

[Doseone]

This is one of the coolest depictions of any deity:

The Devi Gita, or Song of the Goddess, presents a grand vision of the universe created, pervaded, and protected by a supremely powerful, all-knowing, and wholly compassionate divine female. She is Maha Devi or the Great Goddess, known to her followers as the auspicious Mother-of-the-World. Unlike the ferocious and horrific Hindu goddesses such as Kali and Durga, the World-Mother of the Devi Gita is benign and beautiful, though some of her lesser manifestations may take on terrifying forms. And unlike other beneficent female divinities such as Parvati and Laksmi, she is subject to no male consort.

This World-Mother is formally addressed as Bhuvanesvari, the "Ruler of the Universe." She resides in her celestial paradise known as Manidvipa, the Jeweled Island, situated at the topmost point of the universe. From there, ever wakeful and alert, she observes the troubles of the world, eager to intervene on behalf of her devotees.

While resting in her island home, she reclines on a sacred throne or couch of remarkable design, composed of five pretas, ghosts or corpses. The four legs are the lifeless bodies of Brahma, Visnu, Rudra, and Isana (the latter being forms or aspects of Siva), and the seat is the stretched-out corpse of Sadasiva (the eternal Siva). This conception of Bhuvanesvari seated on her Panca-Pretasana (Seat of Five Corpses), reveals her supreme sovereignty, especially over masculine pretensions to cosmic power. Brahma, Visnu, and Siva are three male deities traditionally associated with creating, overseeing, and destroying the universe. But here, as elements of Bhuvanesvari's throne, they represent her latent cosmic energies, unconscious and inert, residing under her feet until aroused by her desire. While lounging on this couch at the beginning of creation, the Goddess splits herself into two for the sake of her own pleasure or sport -- one half or her body becoming Mahesvara (Siva). In such manner she dramatically demonstrates her superiority to all the male gods.

Something about a Goddess sitting on the lifeless corpses of other deities is so hardcore.

[Nyctophilia]

So I had more thoughts about the Far From The Madding Crowd 2015 film (at this point I've watched a bunch of the scenes multiple times while 'processing' I guess lol.) And thinking about various comments I read about the film, and then also started thinking about some personal stuff and schizoid defences. This post has a bunch of spoilers obviously. And I split this post into two in the end because it got too long.

Hardy's novel indicates that Bathsheba suffered from vanity. She tells one of the women in her household that Oak "wasn't good enough for me". I think she was just too young and lacking in understanding. Her true character began to form when she took management of her farm. It was when her values began to take shape that she began to appreciate Gabriel's qualities. She looked at men as though seeing her reflection in a mirror. At first she felt flattered by what she saw of herself until she began to see more clearly. I don't think she was at fault for the ruin of Fanny's life, but she felt herself much to blame. And she came to see the great wrong she had done in trifling with Boldwood. Gabriel gave her a true image of herself, both her faults and her merits.

I've seen comments like this a few times now and I think what came across in the (2015) film was pretty different. It didn't seem like she was particularly vain in the film or that she necessarily thought herself better than any of the men pursuing her. It seemed like she didn't want to get trapped and wanted independence which isn't the same as vanity. I might be projecting though lol. I mean she did bring this up in the beginning of the film but maybe that was an excuse and not 'the real reason.' (We're possibly supposed to just 'know' from having read the book.)

You know like how sometimes students in school will write reports based on the film and not bother to read the book? Maybe this film was an exercise in preventing that.

It also seemed like she liked Gabriel but he just proposed too soon and she didn't want to be married then.

She seemed to express genuine fear at the prospect of becoming married to Boldwood too as I remember.

However this also made the part where she married the soldier guy out of character as she suddenly became impulsive. I'm seeing a lot of the reviews address similar points too though so I think it's just that the film incorrectly portrayed the character.

Far From The Madding Crowd, film review: Carey Mulligan's Bathsheba would fit in better in The Hunger Games

We are made aware immediately that she doesn?t need men to protect her. She is too used "to being on her own," "too wild (always has been") and "too independent" for her potential suitors. She is by far the most vivid character in the film and that is ultimately its problem.

Mulligan's Bathsheba is such a formidable, self-reliant figure that it is hard to credit she would allow herself to be taken in by Tom Sturridge's charming but lightweight Sgt Troy. In the scene in which he eventually cuts a lock of Bathsheba's hair, telling her not to flinch as he lunges with his sword at either side of her face, Mulligan manages to make us believe in Bathsheba's growing erotic fascination with the soldier in his scarlet tunic. What seems far less plausible, given the sheer force of her personality, is that she would marry such a popinjay as a result.

I didn't really find any of it believable (but more on that later.)

Like much sensation fiction, Hardy's novel deals in gender ambiguity and in role play, with its powerful heroine who rides astride like a man. Yet the original Bathsheba is also masochistically accepting of her female fate, determined to "stand [her] ground and be cut to pieces" rather than leave Troy when her marriage to him becomes torture. Hardy's heroine is a paradoxical character, designed to provoke, tease and confuse the reader just as she does her suitors. The new film, in contrast, presents a Bathsheba who is "hygienic" for modern audiences: an empathetic, egalitarian modern feminist, self-empowered but not motivated by power.

I mean her thought process was still confusing to me lol. So I guess it works in that sense?

I felt Frank Troy became kind of a repugnant character. And I think because of things like this a lot of dumb men have this impression about women 'They seem disinterested but they'll meet an asshole and then lose their mind' but I don't think this is accurate for the suggested personality type. You can see that in the comments section of one of the clips from this film on YouTube too:

Gabriel Oak is a fool more than anything else.

The only sensible ending to this story would have been Bathsheba still believing herself to be the heroine of her own story only to be flat out refused by Gabriel on his way off to find his fortune.
He proposed to her when she had nothing - for its own sake, rather than simply because he was looking for the 'safe' option in marriage.
She didn't want him then - and she still doesn't want him now.

All she wants is a safe bet, a future free of risk.

Which is fine if you are talking about business - but we are talking romance here.

Bollocks like Gabriel's story popularly seen in literature are why men can end up believing that the 'nice guy' act will eventually work if they just weather enough of the bad boys that their chosen objects of affection end up cycling through on their road to 'maturity', that doing enough time purely in service to her needs instead of their own will eventually result in her seeing their underlying qualities over that of others.
This is not how it works though - by the time they are ready they will simply be settling for security rather than out of affection.

Those 'loyal' men of 'honor', 'integrity' and 'decency' are the get out of jail free card of these women when they are finally sick of all the fun and risk of their youth - which is exactly what Bathsheba is up to.
Such men deserve better than this, and promoting such outcomes only serves to keep many men in hopeless situations.

Gabriel did feel more like the main character to me. Or like he should have been. He's the one with the interesting journey/struggle and Bathsheba is (or becomes very quickly,) a rich love interest but that obviously wasn't the point and it probably made more sense in the book.

It is unrealistic because normally if you approach someone with her temperament with such intensity up front it will put them off forever. However the story is a romantic fantasy and so part of it is probably wish fulfilment because part of most romance and fiction in general really is. And I ended up reading up on Thomas Hardy and the people in his life (like his sister Mary, and his first Emma,) and that was interesting too in relation to his work.

To make sense the story (in the film - not the source material most likely,) seems to depend on the narrative that after a really long time she learnt to get over him proposing too soon because he adopted the persona of seeming completely indifferent and 'over it' + not desperate/obsessive or aggressive unlike various other guys she encountered along the way (and then we just have to ignore the anamalous Frank plot twist that comes from the book character being a different person? Maybe? Having not read it I don't know.)

Of course he's not completely indifferent after that point and there's first a scene where he says he could give her his opinion on how she was handling the Boldwood situation, she said she didn't want it and he accepts that, but then she got curious and had to know and didn't like the answer so tells him to leave. This really being her own fault for asking. Also notable in this scene is a moment where he points out that he's long since given up on thinking or wishing they would be married.

She then realises she needs his help later (well in the very next scene because this whole film has a very rushed feeling probably because they're trying to force a ton of stuff into very limited run time.) So he makes her come and ask him for help when she tries to send someone else to ask.

There's another scene where she sings an old folk ballad with Boldwood 'The Sprig of Thyme' which is basically foreshadowing.

The whole Frank arc happens. Gabriel tries to warn her about him and she doesn't take that well - because once again it's advice and this time she didn't ask. But when she questions 'what's it to you?' eg: 'why do you care?' Once again he reiterates that he's not interested in anything from her and that he plans to leave her eventually but that he cares about her too much to 'see her go to ruin because of him so if you don't mind I'll stay by your side'

Naturally his advice doesn't work and she rejects Boldwood who'd proposed to her earlier in the film after she sent him a valentines day card as a prank and honestly I've been in a somewhat similar situation to her here with Boldwood. Only it wasn't marriage it was just dating lol and he was several months younger than me. But he also lost the plot. Also unlike Boldwood he didn't kill the guy I started dating after him but he did vaguely threaten to stab him at one point apparently.

So she decides to begin a relationship with Frank and then marry him. Perhaps his advice and final point about 'caring too much to see her go to ruin' was the motivation. It still doesn't work though because your desire to run away from the fact one guy cares about you by 'doing the opposite' makes no sense when the opposite happens to be marriage lol.
Bunch of other stuff happens and then finally he's going to leave for America so she decides to go after him and she keeps offering him non romantic reasons to stick around like money and a buisness partnership etc which he rejects then he says 'it's time for you to fight your own battles and win them too'

After this he starts leaving again and she tells him to wait. Then thanks him for his support and she finally confesses that he was her first love interest. So he tells her that If he knew she'd let him love and marry her he would stay. And she says 'you'll never know because you never ask' and he responds with 'would you say no again?' and she says 'I don't know probably' and they laugh. Then she just says 'ask me' over and over and they kiss the end.

It seemed like she needed him to relinquish the role so she could evaluate her feelings.
Just one interpretation but there's a message you could take from this film if you have to take one - because again it is just fantasy. But it's only marginally useful if you're trying to approach women who have that personality type.

Because it's the strangest thing but women aren't a hive mind they have different personalities you have to consider.

It's implied that she's a little pathological. If you were instead to approach someone with a personality type closer to borderline personality disorder (a different personality disorder,) this approach wouldn't work at all because they are constantly looking for evidence that they are loved and want constant reassurance of that moreso than the average person. In some ways it could be seen as the opposite.
Not that you have to pursue a woman like that. Fiction (which is not reality,) is often written by people with schizoid personality disorder (see later in post because of the direction I ended up going in while writing this lol.) And by people who have to find an escape from or solution to reality. I don't know that Kafka's work is going to be useful or relatable to everyone. Or Emily Dickinson's.

I gave myself to Him --
And took Himself, for Pay,
The solemn contract of a Life
Was ratified, this way --

She seemed to be in love with her childhood friend who later became her sister-in-law after all.

So I didn't understand that part of the film (where she marries Frank,) at all really because not only did he seem incredibly off putting and frankly (haha frankly,) creepy but the whole thing felt rushed and off screen in the same way everything in the film was.

He wasn't creepy when he was first introduced with his story with Fanny but by the time they meet each other he was just wandering on her farm in the dark because he got lost looking for it, she trips over him and they get stuck together. He comes across aggressively and she's like 'please don't stare' he says he doesn't think he's ever seen a face as beautiful as yours to her and she says 'you shouldn't be here' and then just rushes off.

In the very next scene (noticing a pattern/problem lol?) He's just there working on the farm. She seems attracted to him and they hook up and not long after get married. I feel like a lot of the film requires you to have some familiarity with the book so you can fill in the blanks but then everything is said to differ enough that that doesn't help(?) which isn't good imo.

So I then watched this YouTube video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DB0oS3ZTtJQ

The idea was to make all three very possible suitors and that's one of the joys you can see what each of them might bring to Baltsheba.

I mean no? I honestly just found Frank creepy and sinister lol.

Oh my god she even says 'he's the bad guy' a bit later on in the video haha.

It's just not appealing. I do see what they were going for I just don't think it worked.

It's not believable because for most women if they tripped over a stranger in the middle of the night and then they got stuck to them on the ground and couldn't quickly leave - and then said stranger didn't seem to be helping her get unstuck - instead started hitting on her - they'd be very freaked out. After that uncomfortable scene it jumps right into them supposedly having sexual chemistry. But he still comes across very arrogantly and it's deeply offputting. At least to me.

So there's this jarring contrast where they're in the hollow where I'm feeling one set of emotions but also logically thinking 'yes I can see what they were going for. I'm not feeling the ambiguity though. His character who feels deeply unappealing to me is overshadowing it.'

Some comments about Boldwood:

Baldwood would have made a great lover for mrss everdeen. To bad her character was just annoying as hell.

Agreed. I'd have chosen him any day - you'd feel so safe and protected around him. The farmer is alright, yet the other dude is just annoying. But hey, that's just me.

No again Boldwood was really obsessive and apparently this comes across more in the book that he just started to go crazy. I swear so many people are saying this just based on this film and because they like Michael Sheen lol.

And this (and fanwork,) is a great example of why you shouldn't automatically assume the reason why people like certain characters. They might have dissociated and imagined a whole other person.

Same here. I really like Michael Sheen, and I enjoyed his version of Boldwood. However, then I watched other versions of the story and it seems like they definitely toned him down a lot in this version. In other versions and likely in the original book (I haven't read it all the way through yet, so I don't know for sure), Boldwood is very strange. He goes from 0-60 in his love for Bathsheba basically overnight after he gets the valentine.

Yes exactly. And I've had that experience irl too (as I said,) and it's not good.

Damn, now I wish they stayed closer to the original. Michael Sheen is so insanely talented, he would've played the unhinged creep version of Boldwood brilliantly.
Not that I minded this softer version of the character but that would have been really something.

Yeah he has the range to do it, I don't really know why they didn't. I think there was probably too much to shove into the run time of the film.

This comment thread was amusing:

Gabriel Oak is one of the only fictional characters I've ever wanted to be. He is a model of masculinity that the men of my generation so desperately need to cultivate in their own lives. I have hope that there are still such men out there.

Feminists don?t raise such men though. So it's not gonna happen. It will become worse

Not every woman is a feminist.

This discourse which gets everywhere, is like cancer.

Man I was interested in this movie and this comment turned me off so bad so nvm

That really made me lol because I decided to watchit because I read this on wikipedia:

Gabriel Oak is a young shepherd. With the savings of a frugal life, and a loan, he has leased and stocked a farm. He falls in love with a newcomer eight years his junior, Bathsheba Everdene, a proud beauty who arrives to live with her aunt. Over time, Bathsheba and Gabriel grow to like each other well enough, and Bathsheba even saves his life once. However, when he makes her an unadorned offer of marriage, she refuses; she values her independence too much and him too little. After a few days, she moves to Weatherbury, a village some miles off.
When next they meet, their circumstances have changed drastically. An inexperienced new sheepdog has driven Gabriel's flock over a cliff, ruining him. After selling off everything of value, he manages to settle all his debts but emerges penniless.

'even saves his life once' that didn't even happen in the film lol. So I read about that much and was like 'OK I will watch it.' I like role reversal narratives obviously. The cover of the film made me imagine a completely different direction I assumed it would go in and the reality of the film was actually very different lol. I thought he was going to become a soldier later on (I assumed the cover would have the main couple.) Then I though at some point he would work with Frank who was introduced earlier as a soldier and maybe Frank would die. I don't know. I had many thoughts when first watching and none of them happened so in that sense the cover is good.

And all these comments are so off putting haha so if I read them I probably would have been like 'well this is ruined now bye.' I still really like the basic concept and the soundtrack was good, and I liked the film to a point and the acting from some people, but I also obviously have a lot of criticisms.

[Nyctophilia]

So I had more thoughts about the Far From The Madding Crowd 2015 film (at this point I've watched a bunch of the scenes multiple times while 'processing' I guess lol.) And thinking about various comments I read about the film, and then also started thinking about some personal stuff and schizoid defences. This post has a bunch of spoilers obviously. And I split this post into two in the end because it got too long.

Part 2

Just going to leave some statistics here:

Sixty-three percent of men aged 18 to 29 say they're single, as Gen Z men have given up on dating

^ I notice conservatives are predominantly blaming this on porn which seems really dumb to me because what I've been seeing constantly for like... Close to a decade now is just complete pessimism born from the direction social media has gone in where it's basically constant fearmongering about everything. They're using porn as a distraction basically but people can do that with anything. So now it's not just people who are very weird and mentally ill/personality disordered. But most of society seems to be engaging in that in one form or another. Even the complaints about social media are like 'they're getting their needs met there' No. They're not (mostly.) They're circle jerking about how terrible women are lol.

"Are you ready to settle down?"
Nearly two years after she wrote the article, Lee feels the answer is yes - but for a potentially different reason than her millennial counterparts. "In my cultural imagination, [for millennials] being averse to long-term relationships [means] people are hooking up a lot," Lee, 23, says. In other words, it seemed to her that millennials waited to settle down because they were busy taking advantage of the single life. For Gen Z, she figures, "people are averse [to long-term relationships] because they?re more? introspective about the kinds of relationships they want to be in".

I guess in this sense I'm more of a 'zillenial' lol I was born early enough that I remember dating before online dating apps became the dominant way people met partners and so I didn't meet anyone I dated or got into a relationship with using online dating apps/websites which has very much effected gen Z's early dating life:

Almost two-thirds of Generation Z admit they want to ditch dating apps and social media to find love in more traditional ways - after admitting online dating has 'killed true romance'

But at the same time I didn't get into casual sex and I'm incredibly picky, which is why it never worked out. Not because I was trying to have lots of sex with a diverse range of people.
(remembering that amusing 'zillenial' subreddit from before. There were some funny comments. As with everything like this half the posts I noticed were complaining about the definition of the term)

They are literally trying to erase what it means to be a Zillennial? we mid-late 90s borns were like refuges with nowhere to go cause neither generations accepted us, but now suddenly we are allowing anyone that?s not a cusper in? I really hope this does not keep going.

Like refugees? Really lmfao?

It's just so dramatic. It's actually very funny to me because obviously I've spoken about how my nan was made stateless after world war 2 by the red army who rampaged through central and Eastern Europe at the time burning farms, raping women and so on (many anecdotes I have heard at this point.) People tried to seek shelter in a church and they raped them all. Not just German women or German speaking women like in G'dansk or as it was then known Danzig (which they obviously justified with 'they're the bad guys,') but many Polish people and other nationalities too. Karolina talks about her Polish grandparents in her video here about Ukrainian refugees:



Her grandad had to swim through a river escaping Russian troops after they burnt down his farm when he was 8.

My nan also grew up on a farm. She was 18 when she was made stateless though. I think at one point after the war she used to collect coal to sell I think. When I heard her mention her grandma doing that in this video it rang a bell. I think my nan mentioned something like that. She had to live off grass and stuff for a while too. Not easy access to food often. Most of my nan's surviving family (her mum died when she was born, she had a stepmum she wasn't close to and her dad had died I believe by that point,) ended up in Germany (they spoke German as a first language though her ethnic background sounded complicated. I think her dad spoke like 5 languages or something, and she also knew some Russian and Polish,) but she eventually came here in her 20s I believe. So she was a refugee essentially at one point.

I sound offended here - I'm not - the juxtaposition is just amusing to me. On the one hand this sort of thing. On the other hand generation labels that only went tribal so to speak several years ago. And Humans always do this sort of thing with whatever group they belong to no matter how inconsequential.

Bro it's getting to the point 00-05 babies on tik tok and Instagram are saying zillennials is anyone who had millennial siblings and they're saying no one born in the 90s is a 2000s kid only 2000s babies. I'm jumping ship off the labels atp just sticking to very young millennial or last millennial. Our year will always be the youngest but it sucks it's been hijacked by core zoomers!

They're being invaded!

agree. 1992-1999 make more sense. we grew up during the transition between analog to digital. everybody born before 1992 experiences more of an analog childhood.

I still find this dumb because me and my brother had the same childhood basically and don't consider ourselves to be part of vastly different generations, and I was born in 1991 and he was born in 1992.

Someone was also complaining about people born in 1988 calling themselves that lol. Though the earliest date I've seen in the media is 1991 anyway I think?

It's not until you get to about 1998 where it becomes way more obvious to me probably as early as 1995. I think 1994-1998 or something makes more sense if you're going to do this. (I think the millenial age group was supposed to end in 1996 anyway.)

I discovered this label through Strange Aeons (born in 1998,) and that made more sense to me. She seems to incorporate a lot of stereotypical media stuff from both young millenial and gen z culture in her videos like growing up with My Chemical Romance and internet atheists but also all the gen z stuff like being a bigger tumblr user and not being on livejournal and not experiencing the 'mall goth' thing when it happened. Though really I only experienced the tail end of that in the early 2000s before 2000s emo took over and it wasn't really the same where I lived.

There were never that many alternative people around had to go to Camden in London. And we all got lumped together no matter what we listened to by other people lol so yeah. Like the time this girl told this guy I listen to metal because he did and because it was all the same to her I guess like any 'alternative music genres.'

I was mostly listening to mostly pop punk at that time haha. And this was particularly awkward because there absolutely was some weird kind of masculinity hierarchy in music back then (and I think still is,) I didn't conceptualise it as that at the time it was more like 'these things are cool and these things are lame' but it's a proxy for that. (Very funny too because what I was doing was making me terribly unpopular with most girls - I wasn't washing my hair enough, wearing makeup or caring about the beauty rituals I was supposed to be caring about, but it's a different hierarchy.) So I was like 'well I listen to Slipknot' (and I did like some of their songs, I hadn't listened to a lot at the time though.) I liked this song:



And he was like 'ah but that's a hardcore band' but they're not a hardcore band! He was wrong but yeah was funny because later on I listened to some more alt metal and some other stuff. System of a Down I was a big fan of them. Cradle of Filth. I also really liked this one Deftones track before then that I discovered through a video game but I didn't think to bring them up same with Linkin Park - I was technically listening to nu metal around that time but whatever. Probably even liked some Korn but yeah... And I liked proto metal too like Black Sabbath, but I didn't get into metal and non-mainstream metal until I was about 19 really and started listening to Eluveitie. I still probably prefer hard rock like this:



to metal and I prefer more melodic metal too. I'm very picky about metal. I was very into this album several years ago (mentioned that in another post recently I think):



And then (just remembered this) I was talking about some songs from this album years ago with someone on another forum and they said they weren't a big fan of the genre (depressive, suicidal black metal,) and the vocals were less alien or monsterish because they felt a lot of the lyrics/voice and such are more emo and a bit whiny and I'd thought 'that's interesting' because the music itself felt more like hardcore punk to me. And obviously emo and post-hardcore were a spin off genre from hardcore punk like post-punk was from punk.

I can take or leave the vocals tbh but I really liked the music on a bunch of songs. I absolutely love Verklighetsflykt ar min verklighet.

I ended up googling it at the time and it was amazing. I went to back to the post I'm just going to copy and paste into a quote (I don't think I bookmarked that site unfortunately):

(So I was curious and decided to google to see if anyone else had made this connection between DSBM and hardcore punk and found a blog post where someone had and wasn't a fan of the genre or doom for that matter, but a lot of the post was just ranting about modern society and ended with the words 'kill the weak' in all caps, then the comments are recommending Julius Evola to learn why people should hate jazz music. Just amazing that it took 2 seconds of googling something metal related to find such walking stereotypes hahaha.)

It's just so amazing that I just remembered this while just thinking about metal I like while writing this because this is exactly what I was getting at with 'masculinity hierarchy.' Like the purest example of that.

Actually (definitely mentioned this before but it still cracks me up,) that guy I knew in school complimented my outfit when I showed up to non uniform day for the first time wearing alternative clothing when I was 12 I guess. And I can't stress enough how conforming my school was. We're not talking elaborate makeup and hairdye here we're talking a black long sleeved t-shirt and a wallet chain but it felt like I was coming out of the closet that's how insane things were. Later I wore this black top with purple and black striped arms and a piece of black fabric attached to it with safety pins with a cat that I think was skull themed maybe a skull and cross bones cat or something like that and I got lots of questions 'why are you wearing safety pins?' 'Are you a devil worshipper?' etc.

And I absolutely relate to what he's saying in this video about PE kits and stuff at 5:46 (his experiences with alternative stuff is the opposite though for me I got more negative attention.)



Because mostly I just wore alternative clothing but I would end up compromising for a while with PE kits. Plus there wasn't exactly alternative PE kit clothing. I guess 'sports goth' became more of a thing in the 2010s.

As a kid in primary school I was actually quite into sports and running and stuff. It hadn't become something I hated yet. Also competed in long jump competitions with other schools but wasn't very good at it (never went onto the next stage.) I think teachers put me forward for that to try and encourage me or something because of my social anxiety.

Actually I remember the girl who bullied me (of course it's more complicated then that we were in an abusive relationship essentially,) would continuously try to get me to slow down because she couldn't keep up while running which was annoying because I didn't want to run with her I wanted to you know win. That never happened because I wasn't that good but I was better than she wanted me to be, and because she had no enthusiasm for running (or was just very [BEEP] at it either way,) if I went along with that we'd end up in second to last place. And to be blunt it's a very negative feminine thing to do like this video. This is the only upload of this I can find now lol:



This scene from parks and rec is kind of the sequel to the standup in a way lol:



I think that probably contributed to the way I view certain debates now. Like that cis woman in skateboarding who wanted to exclude trans women because she came second place twice. She wants to turn women into victims and a bunch of retarded cisgender men go along with it because of their 'benevolent sexism' but she was OK competing with men when it suited her. And then one person (I think a guy,) was like 'well it's not the same because this makes her so amazing unlike trans women who automatically have an advantage and are just losers who can't compete with men but simultaneously they have an advantage' in a sport where I still haven't found evidence of their being a physical advantage and don't think anyone has done research.

Yes the lack of consistent logic that is necessary for fascistic thought patterns where enemies must be both strong and weak is driving me insane.

Is having dealt with girls like this making me angrier about the state of competition? Probably.

She wasn't well socialised for whatever reason. She was unpopular in primary school (I mentioned this before,) and since I had social anxiety it was harder for me to be assertive with her and I put up with a lot of shit. She kept insulting my surname when I was about 8 so my dad said to insult her first name so I did, and she got so shitty about it. 'It's worse because it's my first name.' (My dad isn't good with advice he has a lot of issues himself.) I remember a period where she would try to force me to play with her in infant school but my memory is vague now. She'd also just dig her nails into my arm when we were forced together in IT class as well and I wasn't doing what she wanted, as I said before. But yeah I knew her a long time. She got better at manipulation tactics and fitting in with age, though she continued to have issues with various people.

By secondary school sports became a kind of tribal thing where 'people who were like me' didn't do sports. It was more about social hierarchy and other bs. Girls were often bitchy because at this point PE lessons were gendered (they were separated by sex they weren't in primary school.) A teacher actually got our entire class together at one point to talk about that because there were issues between numerous girls in PE.

I took up netball briefly when I was 11 and that girl told me that everyone was making fun of me because I was too short to play. Similar to the example below which is a form of narcissistic abuse called triangulation. Only she didn't attempt to make me rely on her here, she was openly mocking me too. I'm not sure if that was due to incompetence or not because she also tried to make me believe my mum didn't love me, and just generally wanted to sabotage any relationships I had but perhaps the motivation wasn't really to make me like her anymore (and I hated her honestly.) But back at the time I didn't know about triangulation or gaslighting (which she also engaged in when she tried to guilt me for the fact that other students reported her to the teacher for bullying me when I was 11 by talking about how she'd taken up self harming. It's crazy because she was already a nightmare and only 11.)

Jean envies her co-worker Carol's success. She feels very competitive with Carol but is much too afraid to openly sabotage her. Instead, she befriends Fran, who likes Carol, and sets about subtly alienating her from Carol by causing trouble between them.

She says to Fran, "I know you like Carol, so I want you to know something. Please promise me that if I tell you, you won?t ever tell Carol I said anything."

Fran is curious and promises not to mention their conversation to Carol.

Jean says, 'I haven't known how to tell you, but I am really uncomfortable about how Carol talks about you behind your back. I have been so shocked by some of the things she has been saying about you to the rest of the team. I stick up for you, of course, but I thought you should know."

What just happened?

Jean killed two birds with one stone. In true divide-and-conquer style, she alienated Fran from Carol and also made Fran believe that she is her only true friend. In addition, Fran is now acting uneasy around the rest of her colleagues, and they have no idea why. They have started to avoid Fran, further cementing Fran?s need for Jean.

I lost interest anyway because I wasn't really confident while playing and also just wanted to play basketball really which wasn't an option. I didn't really get why you had to stand still while holding the ball but netball was the closest thing I could play. (Similar when I took up learning the cello but wanted to learn the violin,) So I dropped it (but I'd done that with stuff my entire life due to attention/motivation issues - and I know what you're thinking but she wasn't involved in most of those decisions. I really did struggle with that in general anyway. Of course she didn't help at all.)

She never really liked sports or PE besides badminton I think, but at one point when I was 14-15 or something that girl also dragged me along to the gym with her so I ended up hating that whole environment too and it was very boring just working out there. So I became a music person instead. (And my most meaningful friendship during that period of my life also developed through music because this girl asked me to teach her the guitar, and it seemed like a better way to find people who were more similar to me, so it just had a more meaningful impact on my life in sometimes very direct ways.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxVj-5213OA

And that guy who was into metal (from my school) was actually the that guy got together with his girlfriend when they were in that year at school I think year 8 (so we were 12-13) and they stayed together the entire time, and I stumbled on his Facebook profile years later after I finished uni and before I stopped using the site and I believe they were still together then quite possibly still are. That's very rare. They got mentioned in the year book because of that at the end of school everyone knew about them because they were always together lol.

I wrote a lot more stuff lol about family stuff but I can't go into it all again here. A lot of it makes me feel emotionally terrible. Even parts of this post might. Even if it's cathartic for a moment it just sort of weighs me down. Sort of on my mind though because my dad decided to bring up some stuff when I saw him last for father's day. Really unpleasant conversation. I went back into panic mode because I hate discussing personal things in person even more.

We have a complicated relationship. As I say I won't go into it all because this will already be way too long and it doesn't just involve him but my entire family dynamic anyway. But one thing I'll mention is I view his attempts to help me as being controlling and have a strong desire for independence though I'm not due to being dysfunctional. I guess I'll keep in this part below as it doesn't cover the really uncomfortable stuff as much and fits the initial 'theme' of the post anyway coincidentally:

He gets really worried and anxious when I go to concerts alone. He calmed down over time about London (or at least stopped expressing it to me,) but now I'm going to something elsewhere in the country and I appreciate that he's concerned but I don't get that at all from my mum. If she does worry she never expresses it which I prefer so much (But she also has anxiety issues and does similar stuff in other contexts sometimes just much less than my dad. My entire family is very neurotic in different ways.) I told my brother not to tell him about this concert and that I'd tell him about it later but he already had by that point. Then was like 'he just wants to be included. That would make him feel more left out.'

And oh he's been visibly obsessing the last two times I visited. Asking tons of questions about my plans. Like I don't run through everything in my own brain because of my own anxiety issues. Looking up hotels on his laptop while I'm visiting 'I could pay for it' because he doesn't like that I'm getting a coach back in the middle of the night. Offering to give me a lift to this other station not too far from here but more convinient so I can get the train from there.

Under different circumstances it might be nice and even useful because then I'm saving money. There was actually this one incredibly cheap ticket from that station. I feel bad for not appreciating it. Other people have parents who do not give a [BEEP] about them at all etc. But I can't accept. Because this has become a symbolic thing that I do alone.

Then he started saying (I don't think seriously suggesting he was just voicing his anxiety thoughts out loud) 'I could come with you I wouldn't come into the concert but like just hang out somewhere.' and talking about how he wouldn't mind going to concerts at some point (which he's done before.)

But I can't balance things. Again it's the 'schizoid thing' like if I had a more functional life, and I felt independent and self sufficient etc, then I suppose going to concerts with him now and then (not everytime) could be OK. In theory. But I don't know because my life isn't like that right now. Is it supposed to be OK for normal people is the question lol. Also it's uncomfortable hanging out with him alone because we rarely did that most of the time (outside of the house anyway,) when I was growing up.

Some of the descriptions of schizoid PD are relatable to me but some of it isn't because it implies a higher level of functioning than I have in general. I can't afford to live alone for example. There's also a lot of stuff I just don't know how to do (which bothers me.) Or can't do. DIY stuff etc. Something about 'we live in a society' but all of my fantasies are along the lines of:

'I'm going to build a portable tiny house and go travel around nomadically' and I'm always alone. The building it myself part is also important. But I also would want to have a romantic relationship with someone I actually connect with and friends. But the process of finding people I can connect with feels mentally exhausting and I do find a lot of people overwhelming tbh.

I think the part that resonates with me the most is the idea that schizoids learn that the adults around them can't help them, and so they learn not to ask for help, and don't feel safe around people. But on the other hand I'm not sure my desire not to ask for help (and I don't tend to unless it's from a 'safe' person, I usually try and figure things out alone,) is just because of that. I might also think I don't deserve help. And obviously I don't like feeling weak either so depending on the context/person the motivation behind not asking can be different.

Somewhat relatable quotes:

Social Fears. Most forms of interpersonal intimacy are experienced as potentially dangerous. This is especially true when the other person has a loud voice or domineering manner, or seems unpredictable.

Elaborate Fantasy Life. People who have made schizoid adaptations tend to substitute elaborate fantasy relationships for real relationships. My schizoid clients explain that unlike in real life, in their fantasies they have total control over what happens. That makes fantasy relationships safer. Some people with SPD create such compelling and elaborate fantasy worlds that they go on to become famous writers.

For example, most of my schizoid clients enter therapy without knowing that it is possible for two adults to negotiate their differences. Their childhood taught them that whoever has the most power calls all the shots and the other person has to submit or leave.

People with schizoid personality disorder often develop a close bond with one "safety person," Greenberg notes. This friend or family member doesn't feel threatening, so you find it possible to let them in, to some extent.

People online do pretty much everything on the 'don't do this when talking to people with schizoid PD list' constantly lol which is prob why I'm so insane now. (Well partly lol.) It wasn't always this bad online though.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/b...-disorder-open

Don?t tell them what they are feeling

My schizoid clients often find it frightening when other people presume to tell them what they are feeling -- even when the other person is right. They tell me that it feels intrusive and presumptuous and takes away their ability to choose how and when to reveal themselves.

Don't tell them what to do

They spent their early life ordered around by other people. Now that they are finally in control of their own life, they want to make their own decisions. This also means that you should avoid giving them unasked for advice.

There are three reasons why you should be extra sensitive to even the weakest "no" you get from a person with Schizoid Personality Disorder:
It is very hard for many people with SPD to learn that they have a right to say no to other people.

If you persuade them to say yes, this might cause them so much stress that they dissociate from their feelings and the situation in order to cope.

If you do not accept their response and keep pushing, they will feel unsafe with you. If they do not feel a sense of interpersonal safety, they will not open up to you. Instead, they may distance themselves physically and emotionally from you.

Lol well yeah that's the disorder I guess:

During therapy, Carla started reaching out to former friends from her past. She succeeded in resuming some friendships. She worked on understanding her past abusive romantic relationships and how they related to her relationship with her family. Unfortunately, she left therapy prematurely. She said by way of explanation:

I think it is better if I don't look to anyone else for help. It is better for me to work at becoming more independent of other people.

Profession: In order to feel safe, they usually try and choose jobs in which they either have the authority to control the situation or their contact with other people is limited, such as working in a lab, with computers, as writers, etc. For example, if they are doctors, they are likely to set up their own practice instead of working in a hospital or as part of a group practice.

So I've contemplated this. But I also meet a lot of criteria for AvPD of course since they're both similar disorders. But even then I actually have so many different symptoms and issues that this is really just one small part of the overall puzzle/clusterfuck (plus not everything is relatable with this disorder. I'm a pretty angry person at times lol,) and it's apparently impossible to get a diagnosis of schizoid PD (or any personality disorder in the UK it seems ime,) anyway I don't really trust therapists or diagnoses as a non-binary person because of ableism as I mentioned before so nevermind.

But there's this one therapist (Elinor Greenberg,) who talks about schizoid PD a lot online (one of the only people who does because the internet is mostly obsessed with narcissists,) because she works with people with the disorder and she wrote a book about NPD, BPD and SzPD and she mentioned that in Germany they took schizoid out of the title because they felt people wouldn't buy the book because they didn't really know much about it lol. So it just seems like there's a general complete lack of info compared to other personality disorders. Probably because it doesn't impact other people's lives as much as NPD, ASPD, BPD and so on.

Also I can't even work a normal job because along with other issues, I'm terrified of 'being trapped' by not being self employed essentially and needing to have complete control. That's part of why my life is such a mess. I brought up in therapy that I was worried about 'what if I need to quit?' while getting a regular job (like it's a thought I have that sort of gets in the way. I worry that I won't be able to quit because of my anxiety or some other reason and end up trapped) and I probably wasn't as transparent about this as I needed to be because I hadn't figured out that was one of my issues fully myself yet at that point but she breezed past me mentioning that. I also couldn't talk about my motivation issues with her. Therapy is often useless lol.

This video is interesting too although trigger warning he talks about his complicated experiences with childhood sexual abuse from an older teen boy at one point:



The part at about 1 hour 33 into the video that interested me the most is when he mentioned a lot of schizoid people like the occult, philosophy, archetypes etc as a way of reframing/rewriting things and then she talked about someone she knew (a client I think, can't remember,) who had fantasies set in different eras and was all the people instead of just one person. Because I do that sort of thing too.

The therapist in that video (who pops up all over the internet.) Takes a very different approach it seems from both the dsm and a lot of people I see superficially list schizoid traits. Like one thing you see a lot is people saying that schizoids have 0 interest in any relationship or connection like in this video:



Diagnosed people are even disagreeing in the comments lol:

I've been diagnosed with SzPD both by my psychiatrist and my psychologist. It's a misconception that we NEVER crave closeness or intimacy. we sometimes do. However, getting too close to people tend to provoke feelings of intense irritability and violation, thus we distance ourselves. This is what Klein refers to as the "Schizoid dilemma" - can't feel safe when you're too close but you also eventually feel so lonely when distancing yourself.

That's actually why I assumed I couldn't have that disorder until I started reading/watching more stuff, but I suppose as with anything it's more of a spectrum. Actually someone else who I had been talking to a long time seemed to think I had that disorder on discord lol (I hadn't brought it up there,) so that made me wonder as well.

it's hard to model how you relate to other people
in that you swing wildly between not doing so at all and wanting to
I'm confident on you being schizoid, but a pretty noncentral one (note that psychiatry's model of that whole neurotype is AWFUL)

I guess he was right about psychiatry's model being bad.

That was a weird server though lol. Just the way everyone talked lots of autistic people etc (when we were discussing which one of us was most likely to kill ourselves. Someone else in that server was diagnosed borderline I think later two people):

Important note re. someone: suicidal women don't kill themselves
(I guess this also applies to [my username], but 1. I don't scan [my username] nearly as strongly as a girl and 2. schizoid =/= borderline)

^ that's a generalisation obviously. It's more accurate to say they're less likely to succeed.

I'm significantly less confident in my 'schizoid PD is practically speaking an ASD' thing than I used to be because [my username] seems super schizoid but not very autistic; otoh, any examination of my framework for ASD and SZD shows obvious huge gaps that I am not doing a great job of filling

I didn't really agree with that lol since I think I have a lot of ASD traits (like special interests, sensory issues, and some degree of social naivety especially as a young adult and at times when I was a teenager.) but not as much as the very autistic person who was in that server with us (he was probably the most or tied in first place for most autistic person I've ever encountered online lol. Very intelligent and started uni early when most people start high school in US but like no social awareness/skills at all,) and probably not some of the other people but I'm genetically female and it's different. There are some parts of autistic female brains that are more like neurotypical males, whereas with autistic males those parts are different from both but this varies individually anyway. And I don't have an autism diagnosis, some therapist just told my dad once that I should seek a diagnosis for that based on some conversation he was having with her about me which he later told me about....

I wonder why schizoid PD is generally considered the mildest schizo-spectrum disorder when it has the most disabling symptomology (or, more precisely, the SZ symptoms it shares are the bad ones)

I think it mostly has the 'negative symptoms' yeah. Because it mostly only fucks up your own life lol. That's another thing I have a cousin diagnosed with schizophrenia (and there are genetic risk factors.) I don't know whether he gets that from family members I'm not genetically related to since it's only him (and anxiety and other issues clearly run in my mum's family too anyway,) but it's interesting. Oh and he got a diagnosis because he became very delusional and tried to stab his sister. So as I say you have to start strongly negatively impacting others' lives before you're guaranteed a diagnosis. Waiting till then doesn't seem like a terrible idea from a cultural/societal pov lol.

But yeah so the other therapist mentions that that's not really the case they just often give up and think there's no way they can get what they need. In this sense it seems to overlap more with AvPD though (which she doesn't talk about she seems to mostly focus on NPD, BPD and SzPD in her work/writing.) But I suppose the real difference is less in underlying desire for connection but more between devaluing others (not necessarily in a misanthropic way but like assuming you can't meet people who you'll connect with and things like that,) vs devaluing yourself (nobody will ever like me because I'm a terrible person,) like AvPD has more emphasis on the latter I think where as schizoid is more the former. I feel like both apply to me anyway though. Because I know some people like me but many people who have liked me and tried to pursue something with me have either been emotionally unstable/intense or I just didn't connect with them so I assume future interactions will go like that, on the other hand I also think I'm too weird and *insert various negative traits* to have a meaningful relationship/friendship with someone who I do connect with or like. So both kind of apply.

At one point years ago my dad mentioned that he worries about my brother too and tried to explain why he worries by talking about his mum used to worry about him and he never got it until he had kids. I guess because he was concerned I might perceive it as 'gender thing' my brother doesn't really do stuff alone though so it's hard to compare. He often goes to visit and live with his friend using public transport etc now (he used to give him a lift and this is progress for him I guess, because I know he was uncomfortable about using public transport alone for a while,) but he doesn't walk around cities he doesn't know alone late at night. He even said to me he wouldn't do that where I'm going. I think he'd be more at risk than me statistically though because I look female.

But I'm sure physical sex does factor in to some extent because deprogramming instinctive behaviours is essentially impossible.

I don't like feeling weak either. I'm a very weak person internally (not sure why I said internally lol it's not like I'm physically strong either haha,) and obviously have terrible anxiety, and it feels like the entirety of culture is trying to encourage me into it.

Oh man I just remembered Gavin McInnes lol because years ago he had this video where he heard some news story about a woman who was stabbed on a subway and was complaining about women riding the subway alone saying things like 'why did you let a woman ride the subway at 4am? A woman isn't a truck you drive up a dirt road' (can't remember exactly what he said but he was basically against the idea of women doing anything that he thinks might be risky. Even though men are statistically more likely to be attacked by strangers.)

Just found this video lol and he's complaining about a woman who lives in a van travelling around Europe etc haha. She found a partner while on the road I think and she's talking about how she worried that they were kind of merged together now and she clearly desired more independence. Again you can see she has an avoidant attachment style lol.

This is conservatives new favourite thing to complain about I noticed on twitter btw (they're so slow it takes them several years - a decade to complain about half the things I become interested in lol. In 2014 I went to Glastonbury - the town - and on the way back just started thinking about it then started looking up videos on YouTube. But obviously the concept isn't new.) Actually no omg that guy on twitter that he included in this video who posted the video of the first woman - that guy blocked me on twitter a while back ahahahaha. I bet he got both videos from his twitter page cause that guy also hates women living nomadic lifestyles as well.



Quoting them/the video:

woman in video: 'I kind of lost myself in this relationship'
Gavin McInnes: 'yeah that's called love you stupid [BEEP]'
[...]
other guy behind the camera talking to Gavin: 'And by the way he glommed onto your lifestyle'
Gavin: 'your stupid lifestyle'
other guy: 'Yeah'
Gavin: 'living in a van? Fucking dangerous.'
[...]
Woman in video: unfortunately it took me moving to Europe and abandoning everything I had in the US to realise that I need to rekindle my independence a little bit.

Then they both go on to say that the guy shouldn't have let her break up with him and just been like 'no, we're not breaking up.' and 'take charge stop being such a [BEEP] men.'

God he's so punchable. And the comments section is a mess too of course. Lots of really bitter men convinced that 'if it was chad or Tyrone she wouldn't have broken up' 'she just wants to have tons of casual sex' and so on. They're just projecting lol because that's what they want.

Oh and that advice seems to assume the woman is doing it to get some kind of declaration of love/commitment which is what people with anxious attachment styles or borderline personality disorder do, but not avoidants. Stupid.

The basic method is to build trust and create safety. Interpersonal safety is the primary need of virtually every person I have ever met who suffers from schizoid personality disorder. Yes, they want other things, such as love, respect, and feeling understood, but their priority is feeling safe with the other person.

My friend has been having anxiety issues lately which is new for him. He's not really struggled with this kind of thing before (so it's also pretty bad for him because it's new,) but his life is stuck essentially and he wants to move from his flat but doesn't want to keep renting but doesn't want to buy a place because he doesn't know if he wants to stay where he is but he won't really be able to find a job just anywhere and so has limited options for moving and he doesn't want to form relationships if he's going to move and so on (the part about not wanting to form relationships somewhere when it's a temporary place in your mind even when you get stuck there - but you don't know where you're going to end up is actually very relatable to me.) So he's having this now and having a harder time managing stress. So he said this:

It's driving me crazy
I wanna just run away somewhere and hide

YES THAT EXACT FEELING. That's how I start to feel at times when my dad tries to help me or offer suggestions which usually involve me losing independence when some things build up I want to just disappear alone. I usually have this vision about I dunno disappearing off into some Northern national park lol. And there are bunch of things besides examples I've mentioned in this post that trigger that. A lot of what I'm talking about is smaller but there's one train of thought + topic that really got to me a lot a while back and still will so now I'm just trying not to think about it until it's necessary.

[Nyctophilia]

I lowkey kinda wish April and Tammy 1 had more screentime together, they had so much potential

I?m still sad their make out scene got cut because ?two women kissing? was too inappropriate for tv.

I'm sorry what? (I mean obviously the character was supposed to be bisexual because it was written for Aubrey Plaza at the time, and she can't really play straight characters LOL. But I didn't actually know this.)

???????

Exactly.

yeah. Aubrey and Nick talked about it on his and Megan?s podcast a few years back

Well if it was scandalous that Andy is twice her age, it sure would be scandalous for a woman who's like twice ANDY's age to be making out with her.

twice her age? He's 9yrs older isn?t he?

Lol I remember how many people were freaking out about the end of this music video because of the age gap:



I like the lyrics to this song a lot but it's more subdued than I like from music so not a big fan of that style, until it picks up after 2:20 minutes and that part is pretty great. Also I liked the kissing/screaming part creatively and didn't really get why everyone was freaking out so much.

Actually though I thought Tammy 2 and April would be interesting to see hook up while watching lol. And Ann. And Ben. So just April and half the cast lol. Oh I don't ship them exactly because I think Andy and April are cute, and Ben and Leslie are obviously better suited I just like exploring possibilities in my head sometimes.

Uh the actor that plays Ron and the actress that plays Tammy 2 are actually married in real life lol.

Also in that video I feel like there's a lot of other clips they should have put in to reveal the conflict in her character more (because it's like 90% 'love' but the title says love/hate,) like that one where the female councillor comes in, and when she's singing that song, and also just more clips with Ann.





Also this scene lol:

April: Is this gonna be one of those cool bachelorette parties where things get out of control and we murder someone, and then we all have to take a blood oath to never reveal our secret?

Ann: No.

April: Then I might have to leave early.

[Doseone]

Imagine if people were as passionate about helping the poor as they were about sports.

[Otherside]

Few years ago, was under a whole heap of work stress, was a very badly organised company. I crashed, burned, was signed off sick for two weeks. And then two weeks turned into three months off. Then I was on and off ill for the next four months after that. Stress pretty much threw me into a depressive episode. CMHT was absolutley useless.

Starting to cross off all of the items on that list of what happened before with what is happening now. And I am so scared that the same thing is going to happen again. I don't even think I have the sick pay to cover bring signed off sick, so it'll be SSP of 90 a week. I have a mortgage now, I need the salary to cover that. I cannot lose this job. I have enough savings to cover 6 or so months, but then it'll be UC, which won't be anywhere near enough to pay the mortgage, let alone pay bills and food with it.

And truly, I feel bad for struggling. I do not understand why I am struggling. I like the job. I like the challenge and puzzle solving nature of it. I don't think it is all work though. Genetic test came back six weeks or so ago. Given a Hereditary Haemochromatosis diagnosis. And I mean...I am asymptomatic at the moment. Discovered my HH status as a result of an ancestry test...and then an actual test that confirmed it. And I know that HH is better to be caught early, you can keep an eye on Iron levels and catch them when it starts to get high, you can treat it easily with literal bloodletting once every now and then and prevent the damage from occuing. Can live a normal life when you do that.

But, with the Hereditary nature of it...I am not the only person in the family who has HH. Those older than me who caught it later on life now have quite serious health issues. There Iron levels are very high. It has caused diabetes, arthritis. The iron levels as they are, they are looking at liver damage.

[Nyctophilia]

It is interesting that 63% of guys 18-29 are single now though (in the US I don't know how it is here in the UK but it's probably not dramatically different as we tend to follow them on social trends.) I figured it would be 50%~ (maybe it was at some point in the past.) Also it's twice as many as women. I can't say that's working out given the whole 'West Elm Caleb' thing a while back. Though technically in that scenario you'd still be counted as single I guess. I mean I don't know how they counted it for these statistics but presumably you're only in a relationship when you're actually in a relationship not just going on dates.

I remember Louis Theroux did a documentary on poly relationships at one point and I haven't watched that particular documentary (I do generally like his documentaries though,) but I watched an interview where he was talking about what he found and he said that it works best if there are multiple women if they're close and get on with each other. That obviously doesn't happen in this kind of scenario and they're also not getting any form of commitment.

Now I'm just reading dumb things people have done while dating because I was looking for a specific tweet I remembered. This isn't that tweet but yeah:

once i went on a date w twitter famous girl. she said i had a frat bro name, that she used to hate nonbinary ppl but now just thinks they're annoying, and that she hated being near clocky tgirls bc she hated being associated w them. then got soo mopey when i ended the date early

like babe i'm a clocky non-binary tgirl why were u even on a date w me

Why did she do that lol? I know the online trans community is a nightmare clusterfuck of weird competitive bullshit but you weren't supposed to join in lol. I guess she didn't realise she was non-binary either.

I'm looking at her photos she doesn't exactly pass, but she's very feminine. I assume she meant someone who passes way less and is also more masculine in some way. It's still basically negging. Or well not exactly negging but it's some kind of manipulative insecurity thing. Yeah like 'you're really attractive for a black girl' that kind of thing.

Jesus the stuff that's come up and I don't think I'm even going to find what I'm looking for.





Apparently this guy:

Rudolph William Louis Giuliani is an American politician and lawyer who served as the 107th Mayor of New York City from 1994 to 2001.

Self-admitted non-binary chaser?

LOL

'I don't find her attractive at all, but I'd still [BEEP] her because I think with my dick.'

OK well, you didn't need to completely reveal that women have complete power over you, and that you have 0 standards, and that you're not very high status because you're not sexually selective at all, and that you're insecure about your intelligence and/or social status because of the comments about Jewish men, and that you're probably not intelligent, and that you're sexist and antisemitic, and that you can't control your emotional response to envy (about Jewish men,) but thanks for letting us know! It's a lot of useful info packed into two quotes.

Then

Trans male boxer Patricio Manuel is now 3-0 in fights against non-transgender men

Hah good for him.

My goodness, there sure are a lot of goalposts shifting in the replies to this tweet!

I'd imagine there would be.

For those at the back?

NO WOMAN CAN WIN ANY BOXING COMPETITION AGAINST MEN SINCE WOMEN HAVE A THIRD OF THE PUNCH MEN HAVE.

Just because a woman won a couple of rounds against weak men doesn't mean a thing. Likely the men were paid to lose or they never win anything since they are terrible boxers.

It's really depressing how negative they are. Everyone is constantly telling genetic females they can't do stuff and some of them are pretending to be feminists. Especially in the cases where it's a trans guy who they need for their ridiculous victim routine.

This is why most trans guy's go stealth. I thought this was funny/depressing too:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Barres

After transitioning, he noticed that people who were not aware of his transgender status treated him with respect much more than when he presented as a woman.[27][28] After delivering his first seminar as a man, one scientist was overheard to comment, "Ben Barres gave a great seminar today, but his work is much better than his sister's [believing work published under his deadname to be his sister's] work."[29] In 2012, he recollected the events of his sex change:[30]

When I decided to change sex 15 years ago I didn't have role models to point to. I thought that I had to decide between identity and career. I changed sex thinking my career might be over. The alternative choice I seriously contemplated at the time was suicide, as I could not go on as Barbara.

Barres was critical of economist Lawrence Summers and others who have claimed that one reason there are fewer women than men in science and engineering professorships might be that fewer women than men had the very high levels of "intrinsic aptitude" that such jobs required.[27] He spoke and wrote openly about being a trans man and his experiences transitioning gender identity in 1997,[31] and his experiences of being treated differently as a female scientist versus a male scientist.[32]

i like how in a different reply you said that he's a small skinny woman and heres youre saying the other guy is a weak small man. just two dainty fellas, i guess. if you think they're small and weak, im curious to know if youre built. but thats assuming youve ever been in a gym

Perhaps the 'small skinny woman' should punch her lol if he's that small/skinny? 'No I'm even smaller and skinnier. The smallest most pathetic creature that ever lived. That's why I must complain about trans men being in men's sports' Jesus even most transphobes don't care about that.

So there's this trans woman who really hates 'afab trans people' as well:

The very idea of AFAB trans people, who are by definition not women (or else they'd be cis), identifying as lesbians is rooted in the transphobic idea that their gender identity is simply a social pretense and that they are still women in every way that matters.

That's not how it works bigender people exist. At one point non-binary people who were out were mostly amab and considered themselves part men + women. Now afab people do and you lose the plot.

I do feel sorry for her a bit because she seems to id as a butch lesbian trans woman, and I think must get rejected from lesbian/female spaces a lot. she's also like 40 something I think, and most [BEEP] people are young. But she's spent years shitting on afab people now (and I'm not exaggerating I first came across her account in like 2018 if not before.)

I'm subscribed to an amab non-binary person on YouTube, and I can relate to a lot of stuff though there are a bunch of differences too in desired body type and I didn't read a bunch of f/f content when I was a teen I read mostly m/m when younger but a lot of stuff I was writing and some of what I was reading was quite androgynous as well. (Think they bring that up in this video but they have a few and I don't remember.) But most non-binary people have a weird and fluctuating relationship to gender/sexuality that they describe. I don't think that twitter user has ever really bothered to listen to anyone... They claim otherwise but clearly don't get it still.



More to the point where exactly do you expect non-binary people to go when say using public toilets? They have to pick one as society in most of the west isn't structured to include three bathrooms. (Though actually in some non Western countries they do have bathrooms for third gender people I noticed in a photo I saw, but I think that's mostly for transfemme third gender people.) I don't like using public toilets. Either one would be/is uncomfortable but sometimes you have to.

I get it though people don't like the reality of non-binary people because it's messy + fucking with their categories. If you don't want to be overtly transphobic than it's easier to try and shove people into a strange unique box of it's own.

This bothers her a lot too:

"But I want to [BEEP] dykes!"

So do most cishet men, but that doesn't make them lesbians.

Plenty of non-woman trans people situationally claim lesbian identity to try and maintain sexual access to lesbians, often actively degendering themselves to do so.

A non-woman lesbian is no less incoherent of a concept than someone simultaneously claiming to be both a woman and a gay man.

The reason we have an epidemic of people identifying as the former rather than the latter is really simple: it upholds systemic transmisogyny.

I probably wouldn't date a lesbian woman. I also would never consider myself to be a lesbian since I'm attracted to guys obviously. This isn't really how things work though historically especially, lots of non-binary people have been lesbians like Leslie Feinberg.

Also the whole point of being non-binary for me was to get away from this restrictive thing you are currently doing anyway. That's also why I'd prob prefer to date someone else who is non-binary so maybe they'd get it.

Amusing:

I do honestly think it's fascinating (but unsurprising) how consistently the trans women with cis or AFAB partners have shittier takes on trans issues and transfeminism in general.

We don't talk enough about the (white) cis woman trans-chaser-to-theyfab pipeline.

She really hates us lol.

No right this is what I was looking for. Very awkward phrasing:



This would bother most people because of the way it's worded, but I am wondering whether you're allowed to have this preference. I don't think you are. I don't really care about the 3 trans women on twitter who prefer trans guys/afab trans people though (kind of ambiguous about the boundary.) Moreover I specifically started following them for their tweets about that. I think they all gave up tweeting about it in 2022~ lol. One definitely said she had realised no one was going to approach her. There's also a general stereotype of all trans guys who are on t being gay I guess. I think most straight guys are stealth though if they transition.

Oh and someone complained about one of her tweets fetishising trans masc people or something. But did anyone think about my needs as a passive observer? :') She seems very intelligent and I can pretend she's talking about me (although I very obviously don't fit her aesthetic preferences lol.) Do you know how rare this is?

That bubble is pretty good to balance things out. Of course if most people read this it would just be problematic as hell. And it's mostly joking. But also not entirely. probably the kind of thing that would really bother that other trans woman actually lol. it's very hard to find stuff like this if you're trying though (mostly because it's comedic and twitter stopped being about that forever ago if it ever was, which is why I'm trying to use tumblr more now.) So most of these tweets are from a while ago.

The gender-nonconformity shell game where people go viral for tweeting like "trans men are allowed to be women" is honestly annoying

The way I literally have to be a [BEEP] to love men in this community... I mean I'll do it and be excellent at it obviously but it was never my intention

i didn't transition for cis people. i transitioned to get attention from trans girls

i always kinda assumed the whole deal with the nonbinary masculine-of-center-they man/dyke spectrum was a beautiful attempt to find the subject-position maximizing attention received from all different populations of [BEEP] women (/s?) and god bless it!!! <3

why's [BEEP] twitter so exclusionary. [BEEP] twitter just been debating who's the queen of pop for 15 years

"bi women dating men can't say partner" like who gives a [BEEP] there's a new Taylor Swift album. Charli still on top rotation for me tho, even after two months she's royalty

I'm bisexual, I like men in the straight way and the gay way

im a trans woman but i am trans masc coded (doesnt smile in pictures)

being trans is cool because i get to be a bisexual woman who really just likes men and no one is allowed to talk shit

Very funny.

I'm mostly attracted to cis guys (from a distance anyway,) so it's not a huge issue for me. I've been attracted to other groups of people including trans women and non-binary/genderqueer people but less often. Sexually I can be attracted to a wider variety of women but I don't know it's sort of pointless because with my combination of issues and other stuff it doesn't really workout irl with anyone. It can't really because of my intimacy/schizoid issues, most people not being categorically attracted to someone like me (which then also affects my capacity for attraction to them I've realised romantically anyway not really sexually,) gender issues with sex, being very picky. I think I'd have to have an insanely strong sex drive or something to overcome all these personal + cultural issues.

I often imagine the cis guys I'm attracted to (who are usually straight too btw,) are [BEEP] women in my head (sometimes I imagine they're a lesbian, it depends on my mood,) sometimes gay/bisexual men, other combinations too. Because I'm an evil fetishist. Cis men are evil too (I've been told,) so it cancels out. It doesn't really. I've often felt guilty for my attraction to cis guys too lol because I'm emasculating them etc (even if I don't imagine them as [BEEP] women, a lot of the stuff I imagine would bother them.) But at least I know they're doing the same to me? Lol. One guy who I was into and sort of went on some dates with (but kind of complicated,) kept telling me to wear a dress. I spoke about him before though.

I wish I had a 'normal sexuality' honestly. Or that I just didn't give a [BEEP] about being a monster or whatever because some people obviously don't.

Also the responses to that 'trans cutie' thing were 99% very negative:

incredible, a nb chaser

If you think that's a new thing then I envy you.

Most chasers within the LGBT community are queer-identified cis women, followed by AFAB non-binary people.

Am I the only one who thought it was cute

^ The single trans woman responding to this positively haha.

yea

absolutely, yeah. this is just fetishization.

reducing ppl to their genitals but in a cool progressive way

I don't think it's necessarily about genitals people always assume that. I mean that's definitely the appeal for cishet men often but not other people. But that doesn't make it better. May even make it worse lol.

"looking for penis in [BEEP] stuff"

That's assuming a lot too lol.

looking for a woman (male) 🥰🥰

that?s what i?m sayn

transcutie is just calling someone a hon and a trannie but making it UwU

"single parent afab enby looking for an amab trans cutie" atp just say you looking for a man.

as an AMAB transcutie i would rather cut off my tits, cook them, and eat them than date this person

^ They really should consider a career in horror writing.

Ewwwww 😟 literally my worst fear is women seeing me as a sex object in makeup

Is it THIS hard for people to just write "yeah I like dick from people with boobies"?
Like, we all know this is purely about that.. right? Just be honest and dont try to talk around it while invalidating peoples identity. That shouldnt be that difficult!

If you think this exact side of twitter wouldn't slam dunk someone saying they want 'chick's with dicks' when every other week is "femboy is a slur discourse' you need a reality check

the poster also doesn?t specify that they want to find a trans woman, which makes it stranger imo because ?AMAB trans? can mean so many things and i don?t think they?d like 99% of them

Yeah, lets be honest with a masc presenting enby they wouldnt be happy

this is worse than regular chasers

classic denton

i saw that on lex and was like ???

not surprised tho that?s denton behavior

Who is Denton lol? Oh right that's the location. Some place in Texas. I thought that was some new way of saying 'sock' (weird non-binary name stereotypes,) or something.

Advanced Chaserism

if anyone ever calls me an "AMAB transcutie" they will not leave the conversation with their limbs intact

I'd rather be called a tranny at this point on god lmao

hello fellow trannies, i am a non-binary (woman) looking for a bepenised (male) woman willing to subject himself to my dehumanizing fantasies uwu

Theyfab chaser is the most evil segment of society and makes up 10% of the worlds population

Lol. I feel like that percentage is a bit off.

my ex called themself an AMAB enby amd it always rubbed me the wrong way so looking at this and feeling disgust makes sense now

like idk why its important to include that.. they had it in their facebook bio, discord bio, carrd, it was so fucking weird to me

I wouldn't put it there but whether people like it or not it's relevant to how you are discriminated against often, and also if you don't include it on dating sites people might reject you. Also people assume all non-binary people are afab which is wrong so how do you talk about that with language? And even Kat Blaque (a trans woman,) has gone on dates with guys where they assumed she was afab because she just put trans in her bio and I guess where she lives most trans people are afab non-binary people. Then she got rejected. I know someone else this happened to who I used to talk to on discord because she's a trans woman but she presented very androgynously (closely shaved hair too,) and kind of looks like an androgynous woman. People assumed she was a trans guy who didn't pass well, when they discovered otherwise she got rejected.

I dunno I don't know why I care. I wouldn't post that myself. I guess because I'm non-binary and I know I have a similar sexuality.

I think some people want to be blunt but they also don't know how to articulate what they want because phrasing it like that isn't really useful. I would bet money that they're not looking for someone really masculine as someone else pointed out. It's fairly unclear. But I also don't think there's an easy way to be clear if you have hyper specific idiosyncratic preferences.

I also feel like it doesn't matter how you think to phrase it having a preference for trans women or trans women + amab non-binary people is considered wrong and politically incorrect etc.

Someone mentioned this as well below and I think it's really funny when terfs try this creepy [BEEP] btw because I could become entirely transphobic overnight and still wouldn't agree with their infantilising and misandric ideology and borg-like sister cult haha. Also I've never used afab housing. Have lived with multiple cis guys everywhere I've ever lived except when I lived alone for a year. I didn't really think about it. If anything I think I found the idea of living in female only housing off putting back at the time when I was looking for uni accommodation in my first year and that was an option.



The trans woman who posted that screenshot was also responding to someone else who was just using faceapp's male gender filter on her photo and posting it around without seemingly realising that in order for that to work in the first place faceapp has to view you as a woman first. I wouldn't say it's great at guessing sex though (based on secondary sex features,) that's not really what it does. As when I posted photos using it before sometimes it would assume I was female, sometimes male and I haven't medically transitioned. I don't think it did that the last time I used it though (with the same photos.)

Omg no way she put a man filter on my selfie that is so beyond pathetic

Nooooooooo you've misunderstood in a way that's convenient for you. This is you in your natural state without the wig and the meticulously applied face full of makeup (mandatory "I'll do it again too")

Oh my God this website though. I don't think this is even a real person. I guess it's probably satire of a strawman?:



It is actually just hell. It's amazing how terrible it is. One of the worst things Humans have ever created. I am in genuine awe.

And this is just a snapshot of the overall hell found in a small window of time bouncing from tweet to tweet.

you go to hell and the dating scene looks like this, wyd

I really get why men aren't dating/in relationships. I mean if they're cishet they're not dealing with this, but dating just sounds like a nightmare in 2023 to me. It's not like I had self confidence to start with even before all this sort of thing lol. It's like an extra level of difficulty even for the average person. You just get to feel like an evil fetishist etc all the time.

I think if you're socially awkward or autistic or whatever it's pretty much game over lol. Or if you want to experiment/figure yourself out etc.

I'm just thinking about this song all the time lol.

[Nyctophilia]

I think this is a form of psychotic delusion now:



https://www.thepinknews.com/2023/05/...lie-bin-trans/

You get transvestigators who think everyone is trans delusionally online.

A man in Ireland has been jailed for two-and-a-half years after a vicious attack on an 86-year-old woman with dementia, believing she was trans and a "predatory pedophile".

He was sentenced on Friday (19 May) after also admitting charges of false imprisonment and robbery.

1. This guy is going to kill someone eventually. I have a strong feeling.

2. Is he psychotic? Are you going to try and do something about his psychosis? Because it's not a rational conclusion to come to that a random 86 year old woman is a pedophile or trans. Even for most aggressive transphobes.

3. If he's not psychotic he's a psychopath and thinks lying about about her being trans should help him get a lighter sentence and he's equating being trans with being a predatory pedophile which tons of people now do. That's fucked up too. If she was trans why would that be relevant?

According to the Irish Times, the pair met at about 2am after MacGowan got lost on her way home, with CCTV footage showing Bailey was with her for more than an hour ? sporadically assaulting her for 42 minutes.

Three students eventually arrived and helped her.

The newspaper reported that MacGowan later told gardai (Irish police): "I really thought I was going to be dead."

Bailey's lawyers told the court he had "induced psychosis" after taking a significant number of intoxicants, and was under "the delusional belief that the victim was a predatory pedophile" and a male dressed as a female.

Well there's a lot of that going around right now. However he was trying to steal her phone which is a little odd. I suppose he could have been trying to get proof from the phone but he also could be lying.

British anti-trans campaigner Posie Parker also recently weaponised the assault of a 14-year-old boy in Ireland, claiming it was the result of an anti-trans "backlash" and that lesbian, gay or bisexual people would be attacked because trans people "attached itself to LGB".

Oh well in this case we know she's a psychopath.

Five juvenile teenagers were arrested over the horrific attack of a gay 14-year-old schoolboy in Navan, Ireland and later released without charge, the Irish police have confirmed.

The victim, who is reportedly just 14 years old, was hospitalised for ?serious facial injuries? and a family member told PinkNews he had sustained "two broken teeth", "swelling and injuries" to his head and face, along with ?some torso injuries".

Why does this keep happening? Are you going to do anything at all about this? At least it's legal for Americans to arm themselves.

This happened in the US in 2021:

A former Virginia Tech football player faces second-degree murder charges for allegedly killing a sexual partner he met on the dating app Tinder after learning the person had been born male.

Isimemen David Etute, 18, of Virginia Beach, told police he had matched with someone named "Angie" on Tinder. On April 10, he visited the victim?s apartment in Blacksburg, Virginia, for oral sex. He returned to the apartment on May 31 to engage in sex, only to discover that "Angie" was Jerry Paul Smith, a 40-year-old restaurant worker, whose family identified him as an out gay man.

Etute told police he became angry, and punch Smith five times in the face, continuing to punch and ?stomp? on his face and body, even after Smith fell to the ground. Etute claimed he heard Smith "bubbling and gurgling" as he left the

"I?m not saying what happened was acceptable, but this was more than someone just showing up to an apartment and punching someone," Turk said.

"Nobody deserves to die, but I don?t mind saying, don?t pretend you are something that you are not. Don?t target or lure anyone under that perception. That?s just wrong," Turk said after the hearing, according to the Times-Dispatch.

If you're so retarded that you have sex with someone and don't bother to figure out their sex first that's your problem as far as I'm concerned.

In April, Gov. Ralph Northam (D) signed a bill into law that bans the use of "gay panic" or "trans panic' defenses to argue for a reduced charge or sentence due to shock or fear at learning of a person's sexual orientation or gender identity. That bill takes effect on July 1, but it remains unclear whether the new law will apply to Etute's case, since Smith was killed before the law took effect.

Do you want to know how much prison time he got for that?

0. Mysteriously the victim appears to have killed himself I guess:

BLACKSBURG, Va. (WDBJ) - The former Virginia Tech athlete who was recently found not guilty of second-degree murder may head back to the football field soon.

Etute testified saying after meeting with that person, his friends joked with him that they didn?t know who the person was.

He then said on the stand that after talking with his friends, they wanted to find out who ?Angie? was. He said on the stand, that the plan was just to run if ?Angie? was in fact a man.

As he testified, Etute said he returned to Smith?s apartment with two teammates to confront him on May 31, 2021. The two teammates never went inside the apartment but Etute said while inside the apartment, something didn?t feel right. That when he said he pulled back a hoodie and realized Smith was a man.

The former football player said he was in shock, and testified he thought Smith tried to reach for something, believing it was a gun at the time. On the stand, Etute said he feared for his life, so he started to hit Smith and then left.

During the trial, no evidence had been shown that there was a gun found in the apartment. A Blacksburg police officer testified about finding a knife hidden between the mattress and the box spring.

In court, a video was shown of an interview with Blacksburg Police. When detectives told Etute Smith was dead, he was visibly upset.

Etute testified he left the apartment believing Smith was still alive.

A jury ruled Etute is not guilty of killing Smith after several hours of deliberation on May 27, 2022.

Prosecutors, meanwhile, argued that Etute did not act in self-defense, noting that he punched or kicked the much smaller Smith at least six times, including after he was on the ground. They also noted that Etute did not mention Smith reaching for anything in his initial interview with police.

Etute likely would have faced between 12 and 20 years in prison if convicted, according to Virginia state sentencing guidelines. The jury also could have found Etute guilty of a lesser charge, voluntary manslaughter, but instead found him not guilty.

So it appears that he's not been sentenced with anything and yet someone is fucking dead.

I have nothing but contempt for men like this and the cultures that enable this.



Well that's enough world forever again. Back to dissociating featuring 1970s rockstar.





He's so hot here it's almost painful. I need him to appear in my dreams.

I keep telling myself I have to stop being weird and 'like this' eventually but the time just hasn't come yet. Oh my God.

Lol just like finding a support group.

'Yes I'm here for my social media and skinny musician with long hair addiction.'

'Uh I'm sorry?'

'Yes I keep getting addicted to skinny musicians with long hair and usually they wear glasses on/off. One after the other. Sometimes overlapping. It's a serious illness.'















"I mean did you really need to link multiple videos for some of these guys?"

"To show the hair length progression of one and 2 of them were wearing crop tops so yes."



"Have you tried I don't know. Getting a life?"

"I was worried you would say that. But see the Steven Wilson phase started four years after I hung out with and has a crush on someone who looked kind of like him. When I was talking about him with my friend the first thing he said was he looked like [name of person]"

The support group is just me and Simon Amstell or the stand up character he created, sitting in a room talking about Jesus's crucifixion LMFAO.



Oh he's probably fine now (relatively speaking.)

[Doseone]

This is one of the best songs ever written:

[Heelsbythebridge]

Dexter is making me want to reproduce and have a son/daughter combo

[Doseone]

If we are just brains, it is highly unlikely that we'd be conscious in the present if the past is infinite.

[Nyctophilia]

An excerpt from the script reads: "Lu wanted to be an actress. Tone wanted to be an astronaut. Their parents told them if they worked hard, they could be anything they wanted. Lu worked hard and now she’s a waitress in The Hat Factory Cafe. Tone worked hard and now he’s a gas salesman polluting the atmosphere he loves. How do they deal with being mediocre like everyone else? By going clubbing in Luton, of course…"

Well that sounds realistically depressing. And yet...

(this is actually some of the worst culture journalism I've probably read lol)

People are asked to pay what they want for the performance

Never seen that business model applied to real life stuff before.

Immersive club drama to take place near birthplace of '90s rave collective, Exodus

See that's a much better headline than this (which uh also has a typo I've just realised lol):

Immersive comedy-drama Club Revoluton explores what it's like to live in Luton

Is there some reason the other article doesn't mention this at all? It's an interesting subculture (rave culture,) and group that they reduced to the brief mention of 'clubbing' in the description lol.

A new play opening in Luton has transformed a local community centre into an immersive nightclub. The play, Club Revolution, is being staged by Revoluton Arts, and is running this week (Thursday 18th to Saturday 20th May) in the Marsh Farm area of Luton, home of the historic Exodus rave collective.

The Marsh Farm area of Luton served as a base for the Exodus Collective — a radical community movement and sound system formed in 1992 that organised raves across the city and beyond. The rave collective was the subject of a two-part radio documentary which aired on BBC Radio 1 in 2021.

Bless (if they mean Luton,) it's not nor has it ever been deemed worthy of being a city haha.

Background info:

Exodus Collective was a community collective and sound system formed in 1992, in the Marsh Farm area of Luton, England. It organised free parties and became involved in housing, social exclusion, and community projects, founded upon the principle of DIY culture. The group squatted buildings and repeatedly came into conflict with Bedfordshire Police, which by 1995 had resulted in Bedfordshire County Council voting for a public inquiry into alleged police harassment. The license of a pub owned by the mother of people in the collective was revoked, a decision which was later overturned by a judicial review.

The collective occupied a disused farm and turned it into a community project which they later bought. The fortnightly raves in venues across Bedfordshire attracted up to 10,000 people and, especially during the Marsh Farm riots of 1995, served to defuse tensions locally. By 2000, the collective was holding licensed raves in agreement with landowners. The collective disbanded in 2000, later reforming under the name Leviticus. Some former members were then involved in the Marsh Farm Outreach community group, which successfully campaigned to build a local community centre.

In summer of 1992, the collective squatted a warehouse which was then evicted in August. Exodus then immediately occupied Long Meadow Farm, which was owned (but left disused) by the Department of Transport. The 17-acre (6.9 ha) farm sat beside the M1 motorway, which was due to be expanded in 2000.[3]: 82  The group renovated it extensively, eventually being offered a lease. A working farm was set up and it began to hold open days for local schools.[1] It was renamed Long Meadow Community Free Farm and had goats, sheep, chickens, geese and Vietnamese pot-bellied pigs.[3]: 84 [2]

Whilst the Exodus collective attempted to create alternative approaches to social problems and crime, they regularly encountered police raids, injunctions and court appearances.[2] Bedfordshire Police operations against the group were given codenames such as Anagram, Anatomy, Anchovy and Ashanti. On 31 January 1993, Operation Anagram saw a large police raid on Long Meadow Farm by 120 riot police. The thirty-six members of the collective who were at the farm at that moment were arrested and taken to the police station.[3]: 82–83  Since it was Saturday and the day of a planned Exodus rave, a crowd of 4,000 supporters surrounded the police station.[2] Police later claimed that they had found ?2,000 worth of ecstasy tablets next to a member of the collective's personal belongings and subsequently charged them with possession.[2][3]: 84  Historian Geoff Eley described this as a "trumped-up drugs charge".[5] The case collapsed at trial with police officers giving contradictory statements.[3]: 84 

Bedfordshire County Council voted unanimously in 1995 to support of a public inquiry into the alleged police harassment of Exodus, to be chaired by Michael Mansfield. The inquiry was then stalled by the Home Office.[2][5] MixMag profiled the collective in 1996, writing: "Exodus is more than just a free party sound system – it's a housing co-op, a city farm, a ray of light in the concrete no-man's land of Luton. They've survived four police operations against them and are currently battling a murder charge, an arson attack and a tractor assault on their rave lorry. This isn't just about dancing, it's about an alternative way of life".[6][7] The murder charge was later dropped. In an uncommon sequence of events, the trial was first brought forward six months and then the presiding judge (Maurice Drake) agreed to step aside since he was a Freemason and the Exodus collective had for years come into conflict with masons.[8][9]

In the aftermath of the 2011 England riots, Jenkins later commented in Red Pepper magazine: "From 1995 onwards we proved that youth diversion works better than police oppression. We stopped the Marsh Farm riot by putting on a dance just outside Luton. We wanted to divert the energy and say, c'mon, let's dance, then let's talk, and then let's build".[15]

The collective named themselves after the track by Bob Marley and the Wailers, also adopting "Movement of Jah People" as their slogan.

Oh yeah that reminds me this is one of the best mashup's ever btw:

The Leviticus collective formed out of Exodus and became a dub sound system. The new collective stated "we re-claim disused lands and properties in our town to create our own tribal dances, free festivals, workplaces and homes... building an alternative 'way of life' in our home town of Luton".[22][23] DJs from the sound system regularly appear at Beautiful Days festival, which is organised by the Levellers.[24][25]

I like this song by The Leveller's(it's also about a related topic)

The Battle of the Beanfield took place over several hours on 1 June 1985, when Wiltshire Police prevented The Peace Convoy, a convoy of several hundred New Age travellers, from setting up the 1985 Stonehenge Free Festival in Wiltshire, England. The police were enforcing a High Court injunction obtained by the authorities prohibiting the 1985 festival from taking place.[2] Around 1,300 police officers took part in the operation against approximately 600 travellers.[1]

ryvoltz - I would put "Force 10" "Mission" "Turn the Page" "Time Stand Still" in my favourite Rush songs.

I don't like Mission (or at least the live version of it I listened to.) So far it's been my least favourite Rush song I think. This one is pretty good though.

this album gets a bad rap i think its some of there best work

I don't think that so far, but they don't exactly have bad work. Like their worst music is going to be better than most current music lol.

Oh and I guess that track is probably their closest to goth track so far (yes I'm still playing this stupid game lol,) but only really because of synths in minor key lol. And the bass is prominentish (usually is.) Everything was synths in the 80s though. But minor key and the lyrics are kind of noir.

If you consider something like:





Lol look! (Found on wikipedia)

"Lock and Key" is an atmospheric, dark rock song,

It's dark. We're getting closer.

[Nyctophilia]

Gabriel Oak is a young shepherd. With the savings of a frugal life, and a loan, he has leased and stocked a farm. He falls in love with a newcomer eight years his junior, Bathsheba Everdene, a proud beauty who arrives to live with her aunt. Over time, Bathsheba and Gabriel grow to like each other well enough, and Bathsheba even saves his life once. However, when he makes her an unadorned offer of marriage, she refuses; she values her independence too much and him too little. After a few days, she moves to Weatherbury, a village some miles off.

When next they meet, their circumstances have changed drastically. An inexperienced new sheepdog has driven Gabriel's flock over a cliff, ruining him. After selling off everything of value, he manages to settle all his debts but emerges penniless.

'even saves his life once' that didn't even happen in the film lol. So I read about that much and was like 'OK I will watch it.' I like role reversal narratives obviously. The cover of the film made me imagine a completely different direction I assumed it would go in and the reality of the film was actually very different lol. I thought he was going to become a soldier later on (I assumed the cover would have the main couple.) Then I though at some point he would work with Frank who was introduced earlier as a soldier and maybe Frank would die. I don't know. I had many thoughts when first watching and none of them happened so in that sense the cover is good.

Lol why was this cut from the film? This seems like a really important plot point and his behaviour in the film makes less sense without it:

One night, Bathsheba notices smoke coming out of a hut and runs inside to save a man--Gabriel Oak--from dying of smoke inhalation. He wants to know her name, but she won't tell him.

Also Frank did die lol so that did happen but I meant, I thought he was going to die in battle or something.

[Doseone]

My sleep schedule is so fucked up. I got up at 10:30 PM.

[Nyctophilia]

There are a couple of people on twitter who I want to continue following but wish they'd just move to tumblr. One I'm pretty sure won't the other (Contrapoints,) technically is on tumblr but just doesn't really use it. I also think if she used it more it would make her posts more entertaining.

Should I get on tumblr? I already have a lurker account

Do you know how to Tumblr ?

Capture crabs, sexymen, color theory?

That's not sexymen as in men who are sexy obviously, but the Tumblr phenomenon. It predates Tumblr though.

Why do Sexymen captivate us so much?
Basically, what the title says. I'm doing this for an essay on culture and since the assignment says fandoms count as cultures. I guess we count as a culture even if we aren't traditionally a fandom and more like preservers of "ancient texts."

characters like Fujimoto, Volo, The Subway Heads....yea my gender envy is all over the place lmao

But I just love how STRONG they feel. theyre so enjoyable to watch, sometimes theyre sympathetic, sometimes theyre irredeemable, but they always have you go "god i wish that was me."

I don't know who any of these characters are lol.

Oh I see (maybe they might mean someone else fairly common name probably not though.) I never watched Ponyo. That makes sense though.



Long red hair, lanky, weird outfit, looks crazy, anti-villain, sorcerer. The sea. Yeah that tracks.

Fujimoto is a sea-dwelling sorcerer who claims that he's no longer human. He fell in love with the sea goddess Granmamare and fathered numerous children

Fujimoto hates humans since he's disgusted by the pollution that they have caused to the ocean.

I wrote this before you as a teenager lmfao. (Not quite but yeah.) Oh well, I stole my ideas/character aesthetics from Poison Ivy anyway. Not going to talk about how I had a crush on a guy with really long red hair as a teenager, then later my first ex boyfriend had red hair (both those guys were after I stared writing those stories/became obsessed with poison Ivy btw,) and I give a disproportionate number of fictional characters/video game characters/Sims red hair.

It's kind of hilarious that I never watched this film lol and only just learnt about this. It has absolutely all of my 'childhood archetypes' in it hahaha. But people who live on islands are always obsessed with the sea. I'm also fixated on the North American deserts/cacti though. I didn't get what Ariel was doing either.

Honestly its lowkey gender envy for me. I'm a transmasc gay guy and my idea of ideal presentation is a charming, somewhat trickstery twink much like a lot of Sexymen are

Also to everyone else: Sexypeople and how they relate to maybe you being on the autism spectrum is okay too! (This is not to say that *only* autistic people find Sexypeople interesting. I am mentioning this as a friend brought it up and her affinity for Sexymen. So far, I'm realizing that people who society deems "different" or the ones who are invested in this Sexyman business.)

The Tumblr sexyman, broadly, is a phrase used to describe any popular male character from fandom that is popular among Tumblr users, to the point that it could be argued the characters themselves are their own fandom. It may be used on characters that are considered (subjectively) attractive or non-human who have been altered by fandom on Tumblr.

But i think its because of the personality more than anything

My favorite characters would probably be a bit insane in real life (le micolash) and being in a fictional world where u can be insane as possible and have it not matter means a personality can be written as extreme as possible

I don't like guys, so it's not romantic or sexual appreciation. I just like the character archetype. There just kinda fun, and I think the whole phenomenon Is hilarious. People being attracted to seemingly the most unlikely characters, and people outside of the community being weirded out by the whole situation.

the original "sexymen" weren?t just "characters a lot of people find hot" they weren?t just "oh you draw this character hotter than they should be" either. the idea of a "tumblr man" was a sentiment geared towards mostly straight women who would ignore female characters, characters of colour, anything like that, in favour of a rampant latching onto average or even wicked male characters. it wasn?t a conversation about shaming straight women, or anyone who was attracted to these people, but rather, a thinkpiece- why are your favourite characters always men? why do you feel the need to be attracted to something, to ?ship? something in media? is it not enough to simply have a poignant theme? why not give more diverse characters a chance?

For me, it's really just a result of neurodivergence, autism specifically, but also anxiety.

For some reason, I always got randomly attached to quite a few characters on here. Sometimes I don't know why and to an extent, I still don't.

I was bullied at school and found out that The Penguins of Madagascar was this fun little show and got attached to Kowalski because I strangely related to some of his traits (obsession with a single topic - science in his case - social awkwardness, occasional emotional outbursts, etc.), so the show and Kowalski for that matter became my comfort.

But since we don't live in that world... (Edit: no we live in an even weirder one lol.) Apparently there was some submarine accident that James Cameron compared to the Titanic, and there's culture war discourse about it (which she retweeted lol.)

James Cameron: "I'm struck by the similarity of the Titanic disaster itself, where the captain was repeatedly warned about ice ahead of his ship and yet he steamed at full speed into an ice field."

Suddenly feminists are not complaining of women being excluded in that submarine voyage to the Titanic

And also the LGBTQ community are very silent on missing out, more so that the this is during the PRIDE MONTH.

Seek help.

(only joking lol there is no help.)

Also lol 'that the this'

Feminists were very silent when dinosaurs went extinct

Lol.

I also like that feminist and LGBT+ have just become genders. The three genders - feminist (woman,) annoying cishet conservative man (man,) and LGBT+ (non-binary I guess. How woke of them.)

You don't understand the fight of feminists and the LGBTQ community, that is why you would say such things. How does forming part of this trip advance their fight? You are exposing yourself

Even though as I'm reading now this was 100% a capitalistic individualist mission there's this ironic subtext of 'they're doing something great for Humanity' or 'insert nation based collectivism here' in this tweet. Why should LGBT+ people do anything when a bunch of countries still legally kill gay men, trans women and GNC amab people, and a bunch of countries still legally kill gay men, trans women and GNC amab people (pretend not to edition):

Prosecutors, meanwhile, argued that Etute did not act in self-defense, noting that he punched or kicked the much smaller Smith at least six times, including after he was on the ground. They also noted that Etute did not mention Smith reaching for anything in his initial interview with police.

Etute likely would have faced between 12 and 20 years in prison if convicted, according to Virginia state sentencing guidelines. The jury also could have found Etute guilty of a lesser charge, voluntary manslaughter, but instead found him not guilty.

Lol.

Or the elderly cisgender women that now get chucked in wheelie bins because strange delusional cishet men think they're trans. They get 2 1/2 years lol. If she was trans he would have gotten away with it but she was cisgender so he gets a grand total of 2 years and no mention of therapy whatsoever.

A man in Ireland has been jailed for two-and-a-half years after a vicious attack on an 86-year-old woman with dementia, believing she was trans and a "predatory pedophile".

And I posted about this just days ago. Nobody cares about whatever you are doing with a submarine.

Since you want to make this an entire thing and clearly don't care about the people who died who you've not mentioned in your tweet at all (so I had to google to even know.) If you'd like attention 'cis het man (tm)' become Porcupine Tree.

I really hope they play Buying New Soul. I'm incredibly worried they won't. I've wanted to hear that song live for about a decade. And this is probably going to be their last tour. 😭 I've seen Steven Wilson live four times but he doesn't play that song live at his solo concerts because he needs Richard Barbieri, except the one time they did because he was there and I wasn't at that specific concert.

Oh my God you don't understand.

My dream is to become famous/high profile on twitter without having to use the site, and then derail the entire site by endlessly talking about Rush and Porcupine Tree. Other stuff too perhaps but just talking about Rush and Porcupine Tree would be funny. Just tweeting constantly off topic stuff in response to annoying stuff. And because I'm popular it will draw everyone's attention away and they'll be confused. LGBT+ do want to confuse you yes.

Posting this on every tweet:









What can this strange device be?
When I touch it, it gives forth a sound
It's got wires that vibrate, and give music
What can this thing be that I found?

See how it sings like a sad heart
And joyously screams out its pain
Sounds that build high like a mountain
Or notes that fall gently, like rain.

I can't wait to share this new wonder
The people will all see its light
Let them all make their own music
The Priests praise my name on this night.

---

I know it's most unusual
To come before you so
But I've found an ancient miracle
I thought that you should know
Listen to my music
And hear what it can do
There's something here as strong as life
I know that it will reach you.

Yes, we know
It's nothing new
It's just a waste of time
We have no need for ancient ways
Our world is doing fine
Another toy
That helped destroy
The elder race of man
Forget about your silly whim
It doesn't fit the plan

I can't believe you're saying
These things just can't be true
Our world could use this beauty
Just think what we might do

---

They left the planet long ago
The elder race still learn and grow
Their power grows with purpose strong
To claim the home where they belong

Home to tear the Temples down
Home to change

---

The sleep is still in my eyes
The dream is still in my head
I heave a sigh, and sadly smile
And lie a while in bed

I wish that it might come to pass
Not fade like all my dreams
Just think of what my life might be
In a world like I have seen

I don't think I can carry on
This cold and empty life

My spirits are low, in the depths of despair
My lifeblood
Spills over.

---

Attention all Planets of the Solar Federation
Attention all Planets of the Solar Federation
Attention all Planets of the Solar Federation

We have assumed control.
We have assumed control.
We have assumed control.

Get it? Because it's a stupid dream:



And then eventually they'll just have to merge the site with Porcupinetree.com (or Rush's official website.) And it will be like one giant forum for music.

And then I can rest in peace. Having finally destroyed the worst thing to ever happen to Humanity. (Obviously an exaggeration, but not as big of an exaggeration as you'd want it to be.)

Lol that's what Loki started right?

Ragnarok is the cataclysmic battle between the forces of chaos and those of order in Norse mythology, ending the world and killing most of the gods and their adversaries, leading to the birth of a new world. It has been claimed, however, that in pre-Christian Norse belief there was no rebirth after the fall of the gods.

Ragnarok ("Fate of the Gods") is also given as Ragnarokkr ("Twilight of the Gods") and is the pivotal event that ends the mythic cycle beginning with the birth of the gods of Asgard (the Aesir) and the creation of the Nine Realms of Norse cosmology. The gods established order and restrained the forces of chaos, but at Ragnarok, these forces break free, and even though the gods know they are doomed, they march to battle to save the world they have created.

The trickster god Loki finds out about the mistletoe and brings a sprig back to Asgard where the gods are enjoying a game of hurling things at Baldr to watch them bounce off him harmlessly. Baldr?s brother, the blind god Hodr, cannot see to join in the game so Loki puts the sprig in his hand, directs his aim, and the mistletoe strikes and kills Baldr. The god Hermodr then rides Sleipnir down to Hel to ask Hel, Queen of the Dead, for Baldr's return. She agrees on the condition that all things weep for his death. Hermodr almost succeeds in this, but a giantess named Thokk (who is actually Loki) refuses and so Baldr must remain in the realm of death.

Odin then mates with the giantess Rindr for the sole purpose of engendering the hero-god V?li who grows to full adulthood in a day and kills Hodr to avenge the death of Baldr. V?li then assists the other gods in tracking down Loki, killing his son Narfi and tearing out his intestines, using them to bind Loki in a cave where a serpent drips burning venom on his head.

Prior to Baldr?s death, Odin had ordered some of Loki?s other children, the wolf Fenrir, serpent J?rmungandr, and the j?tunn Hel, taken from their mother in the realm of Jotunheim. J?rmungandr was thrown into the sea, Fenrir chained to a rock on an island, and Hel was sent to preside over the land of the dead below the realm of Niflheim. Once Baldr dies and cannot return to life, the clock begins ticking toward Ragnar?k when Loki?s children, as well as their father, will break loose to attack the gods and the world of order.

McCoy?s claim, however, is interesting to consider as he notes that the tale of Ragnarok would have developed during a time when Christianity was "killing" the old gods and ending traditional Norse values. The world one had known was changing into something new and, initially at least, unwelcome as a foreign belief system replaced the order, traditions, and rituals one had always known. In this climate of uncertainty, the end of the world without the possibility of a rebirth would certainly have suggested itself. At the same time, pre-Christian Scandinavian and Icelandic belief seems to recognize the cyclical nature of existence ? as many ancient cultures did ? and it is equally possible, even probable, that they saw in Ragnarok only an end to one part of the cycle of life which rises and falls to rise again.

Warhammer 40k decided to push further into this direction so now it's both unambiguously androgynous and unambiguously destroying you for basically moral reasons:

Slaanesh typically appears in an androgynous form in which it is a woman on the right side and a man on the left with two sets of devilish horns growing from its head. Slaanesh can assume any physical form; male, female, both at the same time or no gender at all, but it prefers male bodies. In whatever physical form it chooses, Slaanesh is perfection. A long-limbed, elegant figure with a haunting, almost frightening beauty, Slaanesh's appearance depends more on the observer than the observed, changing eagerly to please and seduce the eye of the beholder.

Wherever mortals are ruled by their own unquenchable desires, the Dark Prince of Chaos is there in the shadows, whispering, tempting, and feasting on a banquet of souls. But this is true in all things, not just carnal pleasures. Those who desire to indulge in the finest culinary delights, the most beautiful artworks, even the most sensual clothing, could all be amongst Slaanesh's disciples. Just as importantly, Slaanesh is also the god of perfection. The singer striving for the most beautiful song or the warrior who seeks the perfect fighting techniques, both could be devotees of Slaanesh.

Slaanesh was given life by the immorality and hubris of the ancient Aeldari Empire. As their empire reached its zenith, the Aeldari became lost in their own decadence, for they experience sensation and emotion to a far greater degree than any other intelligent species of the galaxy. The capabilities of their highly advanced technology meant that the Aeldari did not need to labour or wage war. Instead, they were able to dedicate their lives to whatever idle pursuits took their fancy. Over several generations, this indolence and hedonism came to rule and pervert their souls.

After its birth, Slaanesh slew most of the Aeldari and their gods in the Immaterium, except for the Aeldari god of war Kaela Mensha Khaine. Khaine's psychic energy was instead dispersed into many separate pieces scattered across the various Infinity Circuits of the Aeldari craftworlds. The Laughing God Cegorach also survived Slaanesh's birth by fleeing into the Labyrinth Dimension of the Webway. While Isha, the goddess of fertility and the harvest, was defeated alongside her divine brethren, she was not destroyed outright and absorbed by Slaanesh like the rest of the Aeldari pantheon. Slaanesh vanquished her as it had all of the other Aeldari gods within the Warp, but only took her prisoner rather than absorbing her energies outright.

Samael (Hebrew: סַמָּאֵל, Sammāʾēl, "Venom/Poison of God";[1] Arabic: سمسمائيل, Samsama'il or سمائل, Samail; alternatively Smal, Smil, Samil, or Samiel)[2][3][4] is an archangel in Talmudic and post-Talmudic lore; a figure who is the accuser or adversary (Satan as mentioned in the Book of Job), seducer, and destroyer (Mashhit as mentioned in the Book of Exodus).

Although many of his functions resemble the Christian notion of Satan, to the point of being sometimes identified as a fallen angel,[5][6][7]: 257?60  he is not necessarily evil, since his functions are also regarded as resulting in good, such as destroying sinners.[3]

The Zohar:

Lilith, a daughter of the moon, derives her nightmarish qualities from the resentment and humiliation of the moon. Unlike the Babylonian Talmud, the Zohar does not believe that Lilith emerged alongside Adam. In the Zohar, Lilith and Samael the Devil emerge together from the realm of evil as an androgynous hermaphroditic pair. Lilith exists within Samael as a "feminine transpersonal shadow" (Koltuv 6). The birth of Lilith and Samael in the spiritual realm corresponds to the birth of Adam and Eve on Earth.

However, the marriage between Lilith and Samael, complicated as it is, cannot last forever. God, upset with their demonic progeny, castrates Samael. Lilith, unable to procreate with Samael, goes back into the earthly realm to create offspring from the seed of man.

God placed Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and forbade them from eating fruit from the tree of knowledge. A serpent, possibly Samael or the Devil, tempts Eve to Eat the Fruit. Eve shares the fruit with Adam, and God banishes them from Eden. The Midrash, an ancient biblical exegesis, wonders if Lilith is the serpent. Depending on the myth, however, Lilith is by the Red Sea when Eve eats the apple.

Lol. Wouldn't post that. They'd take it far too seriously. They already do. You have to treat it with a kind of post-ironic ambivalence.

This is so funny too:

https://creativematter.skidmore.edu/...=eng_stu_schol

She just starts talking about Wuthering Heights:

If the moors are Hell, then Heathcliff and Catherine are their Samael and Lilith. The Zohar and Talmud present different origin stories, but they both understand that Lilith and Samael must unite; whether the Blind Dragon brings them together or they enter the world as the inverted Adam and Eve, Lilith and Samael are destined to unite and rule Hell together. Catherine and Heathcliff do not enter the world as an androgynous pair, but there is a preternatural connection amongst them and the moors. Nelly notes that Catherine and Heathcliff almost immediately bond after Mr. Earnshaw brings Heathcliff to Wuthering Heights. Catherine asks for a whip, and she receives the devil himself.10 Heathcliff, whose heart is an ?earthly Hell? (246), is undeniably the Devil in Bront??s Hell.11 We see that fiery hell-bound soul burning behind both of their eyes. Heathcliff has eyes that spark "black fire" (75), and Catherine has eyes that ?flash? (121). Their love is unearthly; it is amoral. Hellfire fuels their devotion. Following her dream about Heaven and Hell and the heath, Catherine asserts: "Nelly, I am Heathcliff" (64).

But I think she might be onto something. Whenever I wanted my brother to leave my room I would just play this song:



Her voice is in general an acquired taste, and this would drive him absolutely insane.

Lol:

Why do people keep saying she's terrifying? She's ethereal and straight up breathtaking. And, I think I love her.

(I mean it is was better than my prior method when he refused to leave which was to just threaten his favorite stuffed animal. It usually worked too but I was never going to do anything that messed up to it lol because I have too much empathy for cute things.)

This is funny too (they just merged it with Foundations by Kate Nash.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjHRFkkGYgA

Oh my god why is the YouTube search bar suggesting 'kate bush wuthering heights gucci gang' to me. Nothing came up but who is searching for that cursed [BEEP] hahahaha?

When you think about it Kate Bush is the reason for my broken sexuality (tm)/skinny musician thing. Because I was obsessed with Patrick Wolf when I was 15/16 and she heavily inspired him and his music. Lol no it actually started before him but that's more fun. Also he has new music out now and I haven't listened to it lol. (He took a really long break and I didn't listen to his last album because it didn't interest me,) He's just 'in the past.' I'll probably listen to it at some point though. My friend/second ex-boyfriend looks a bit like him (or did when younger,) during the Tristan music video era and that's kind of disturbing sometimes when I look at certain photos/watch videos. Just a bit. He looks like a cross between Louis Theroux (and he hated comparisons to him lol,) Patrick Wolf and Keira Knightley. (I remember at one point either he or someone else photoshopped his head onto her body on Facebook. I can't remember the details of that now though no I wasn't involved surprisingly.) That's just because white British people all look like the same seven or so people though. The game developers thought they could get away with it but it does break suspension of disbelief. Tilda Swinton and David Bowie have the same face template.

The defining/dividing line between gen z and younger millennials is actually if you learnt about Running up That Hill from Stranger Things or from Placebo when you went through a phase of listening to their cover on repeat while trying to paint Glastonbury Tor with a kind of space/nebula sky surrounding it and failed miserably because you're not good at painting:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIJ8DogiIiw

Not when I actually went to Glastonbury when I was 23 (that would have made more sense huh lol.) From a photo when I was 16-18 or something.

Culture is just going to be Kate Bush being reinvented forever haha.

Oh and you know like how The Crow universe is 'cursed?' (no but people say that because of all the bad stuff that happened surrounding it's creation and later the filmset.) This is another one of those things. But it was bound to happen eventually.

OceanGate Expeditions offers eight-day tourist missions to see the Titanic wreckage at a cost of $250,000 a person.

"OceanGate has successfully completed over 14 expeditions and over 200 dives in the Pacific, Atlantic and Gulf of Mexico," its website says.

"Following every mission, the team evaluates and updates the procedures as part as a continued commitment to evolve and ensure operational safety."

Lol wikipedia:

Although this disorder does not affect the patient's capacity to understand reality, they may engage in excessive daydreaming and introspection.[43][159][160] Their daydreams can grow to consume most of their lives. Real life can become secondary to their fantasy,[7] and they can have complex lives and relationships which exist entirely inside of their internal fantasy. These daydreams may constitute a defense mechanism to protect the patient from the outside world and its difficulties.[61][119][161] Common themes in their internal fantasies are omnipotence and grandiosity.[59] The related schizotypal personality disorder and schizophrenia are reported to have ties to creative thinking, and it is speculated that the internal fantasy aspect of SzPD may also be reflective of this thinking.[162][163][164] Alternatively, there has been an especially large contribution of people with schizoid symptoms to science and theoretical areas of knowledge, including mathematics, physics, economics, etc. At the same time, people with SzPD are helpless at many practical activities because of their symptoms.[165]

Rude of you to notice/attack me like this.