Random Thought of the Day

[Ironman]

Time to rest.

[Nyctophilia]

Are there any old cultures where "AFABs" are part of a third gender/are nonbinary?

I've been asking myself this question forever and have been disappointed by what I've found. The only two instances I'm aware of are Balkan sworn virgins and Afghan bacha posh. I'm not an anthropologist or social scientist so take this with a grain of salt, but I don't think these masculine AFAB third genders are on the same playing field as feminine AMAB third genders. The AFAB third genders stem from their societies being patriarchal and lacking women's rights, and don't seem to possess any sort of special status in their communities. AMAB third genders are generally seen as holy or hold an elevated social status. Cultures with AFAB third genders throw their hands up and say "welp, being a woman in our society is shitty so here's a way out. Don't expect anything special from it, though." While cultures with AMAB third genders say "wow, you're so special and cool and respected!" No shade to AMAB third genders, but it fucking sucks for people like us. I just want to be recognized and loved like they are.

Yeah this is frustrating (and lonely.) You can find stuff if you dig around and technically the catholic church sort of did this with all the crossdressing female saints and monks etc while demonising the reverse, they just didn't specify things linguistically. Usually that kind of imagery and related folklore is used to promote war propaganda (fun.)

This group in Indonesia (technically anywhere in South East Asia has some group that is less visible, without emphasis on women's rights, but they don't necessarily have specific social roles.)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender...ociety#Calalai

The calalai are assigned female at birth but take on the roles of heterosexual men. They present themselves as men, hold masculine jobs and typically live with female partners to adopt children.[20] Although they typically dress masculinely, many calalai include distinct indicators of a unique calalai identity in their style and do not dress entirely like oroane, such as by wearing an earring only in the right ear (compared to the left ear for oroane and both ears for makkunrai).[18] The calalai are often expected to exhibit a mixture of feminine and masculine virtues, such as devotion and bravery, respectively.[18] Similarly, calalai can perform both masculine and feminine behaviors, and there is a certain degree of fluidity in this expression depending on the occasion.[19]

There is a considerably small number of calalai even compared to the bissu and the calabai because many are disincentivized from identifying as calalai. There is generally a higher level of discrimination towards people assigned female at birth who forego becoming mothers and wives, and they are often stereotyped as lazy. Much of their work is also out of public view, such as in agriculture, compared to calabai who are often seen working as cooks, hairdressers and wedding planners, and these contrasts may contribute to this stereotype.[18]

The constant emphasis on escaping the patriarchy is overstated due to the feminist ideological lens. You have to do way more digging and it is annoying but you can kind of read between the lines sometimes as well.

People will write stuff like this on websites while talking about a bunch of amab gender stuff and it's incredibly lazy:

#1 Why Are Most Ancient Genders Trans Femme?

Ancient trans men and other AFAB people are largely undocumented due to misogynistic bias from historians. Most scholars throughout history have been male-identified people in a patriarchal society.

Most accounts of trans-masc people outside of war are of monks passing under the guise of being eunuchs. Monastic life helped AFAB people transcend the limitations of the patriarchy.

In essence, these AFAB individuals lived as ascetic holy men. The normalized ritual self-harm may have had gender-affirming effects as well. Malnourishment may have stopped their periods and decreased the size of their breasts.

Many also underwent self-mastectomies [11].

It is difficult to find as much detail as you want, and transfemme gender identities are better documented, but you can also literally go on wikipedia and find the paragraphs I quoted above and most of those identities go back a long way (plus they included stuff from like the 18th century in their article which isn't ancient anyway.) Public Universal Friend helped found a town in the 17th century lol:

The most committed members of the Society of Universal Friends were a group of unmarried women who took leading roles in their households and community. In the 1790s, members of the Society acquired land in Western New York where they formed the town of Jerusalem near Penn Yan, New York. The Society of Universal Friends ceased to exist by the 1860s. Many writers have portrayed the Friend as a woman, and either a manipulative fraudster, or a pioneer for women's rights; others have viewed the Friend as transgender or non-binary and a figure in trans history.

The Friend preached sexual abstinence and disfavored marriage, but did not see celibacy as mandatory and accepted marriage, especially as preferable to breaking abstinence outside of wedlock.[81] Most followers did marry, but the portion who did not was significantly above the national average of the time.[62] The preacher also held that women should "obey God rather than men",[80] and the most committed followers included roughly four dozen unmarried women known as the Faithful Sisterhood who took on leading roles of the sort which were often reserved to men.[82] The portion of households headed by women in the Society's settlements (20% ) was much higher than in surrounding areas.[83]

Juster and others state that, to followers, the Friend may have embodied Paul's statement in Galatians 3:28 that "there is neither male nor female" in Christ.[133][135] Catherine Wessinger, Brekus, and others state that the Friend defied the idea of gender as binary and as natural and essential or innate,[136][137][138] though Brekus and Juster argue that the Friend nonetheless reinforced views of male superiority by "dressing like a man" and repeatedly insisting on not being a woman.[139][137] Scott Larson, disagreeing with narratives that place the Public Universal Friend into the gender binary as a woman, writes that the Friend can be understood as a chapter in trans history "before 'transgender'".[134][140] Bronski cites the Friend as a rare instance of an early American publicly identifying as non-binary.[39]

They are so annoying.

I googled for five minutes and found this webpage. The examples here are not great parallels to Western non-binary identity as nobody mentions having sexual instincts that don't correspond to their birth sex (Edit: one person mentioned here does discuss this in a different paper I found later lol. I think anyway they have the same name,) or a desire for other sex anatomy/appearance. Non-binary people generally have feelings like binary trans people but with a less strict identity/variable/androgynous dysphoria. And things like that personally had a bigger impact on my identity.

http://intersections.anu.edu.au/issue6/graham.html

This paragraph is confusing to read but interesting in that they blame a feminine woman for seducing them which goes against heteronormative Western rhetoric about gender expression and sexuality lol:

You know, the most important factor was influence from a linas. You see, I was chosen and seduced by a linas over a long time, and this is what made me become ill [sakit]. Before, I wasn't ill, I used to just act like a man [dulu saya tidak sakit, cuma gaya seperti lelaki]. Then there was a linas who always approached me and wanted to be pacaran [partners]. At first, when we became friends, I didn't think about sex. The linas kept paying me lots of attention but I was still scared because I still had feelings like a woman. I was still 16 then. But I was from a broken home and I really enjoyed all the attention I was getting. So finally I too became ill [saya ikut sakit] and became a hunter.

Eri's eventual attraction to and relationship with a linas may be seen as a continuation of hir masculine behaviour which was just like a man. However, s/he still had feelings like a woman and so it was not necessarily a natural progression. Without the attention from a linas Eri may not have developed a calalai' identity. Eri's use of the term sakit [ill] reflects public discourse which states that same-sex sexual desire is sinful. Even though Eri became involved in a relationship, the notion that such attraction is abnormal is still evident. For Dilah it was attraction to a woman which initiated hir formation of a masculine calalai' identity:

[9] Dilah reveals that 'A linas is a woman who feels like a woman, but she does not like men; she likes females who have the style of men.' Linas' subjectivity is also an important site for examination. Indeed, in many ways, linas are challenging gender roles more subversively than calalai'. For instance, many linas are married to men and have children, but continue to find emotional satisfaction with calalai'. Moreover, linas flaunt femininity and yet rebel against proscriptions usually applied to women. Linas demand freedom to travel around on their own, to wear short skirts, and are sexually assertive, as Dilah notes: 'Linas are by far the most aggressive partners, they are always the first to ask for sex.'

^ I'm curious about this group but can't find anything about them googling so this paper looks like the only reference I can find unfortunately. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a group distinct from other women, if it maps onto 'Dee' identity in Thailand and femme identity in the West. The gender roles in that culture seem pretty strict but I'm curious by the fact that they seem to ignore most rules but still present femininely and whether something similar would happen in the West if we had stricter rules.

I mean bisexual women are usually femme and have different personality traits often in the West compared to straight women as well according to research but if this group only dates men and calalai I don't think that maps well onto Western bisexuality. It's more like the butch/femme dynamic of lesbian relationships + men but there are also a bunch of straight-adj women who sometimes date butch women and trans men. Bisexuality is a pretty heterogenous label anywhere so a bunch of stuff is incorporated into that and the personality differences don't apply to every 'subgroup.' I mean there are findings like this:

A potential explanation for this is that the life history strategies of nonheterosexual women are faster than heterosexual women's, for which there exists abundant evidence (Luoto et al., 2019a,b). One manifestation of this psychobehavioral masculinization in non-heterosexual women is their increased interest in casual sex (i.e., a fast mating strategy) and heightened aggression (Luoto et al., 2019a), both of which have been repeatedly linked to psychopathy and narcissism.

This aligns with our (somewhat mixed) finding of higher Dark Triad scores in bisexual women, as Machiavellianism and psychopathy are associated with faster life history strategies (Jonason et al., 2017), while different elements of psychopathy and narcissism are associated with fast and slow life history factors (McDonald et al., 2012).

Indeed, the higher rates of psychopathy among bisexual women relative to homosexual women may reflect greater intrasexual competition (e.g., rivalry) and stronger mating motives given the bidirectional breadth of bisexual women's sexual/romantic interests.

https://gwern.net/doc/psychology/per...21-jonason.pdf

I assume something similar is going on so they ignore rules that don't suit them more often if Dilah's viewpoint is generalisable.

The participants in the above study though are from a W.E.I.R.D sample (Western, educated etc. I always forget what the acronym stands for. This group pop up in studies a lot but are actually pretty different from people elsewhere and so it's not great but it looks like this might be applicable outside this group.)

The main reason I'm curious is it's not obvious what's going on with this connection in Western research where dark triad traits are higher in bisexual and gay men and bisexual women but not lesbian women compared to straight men and women:

The findings support the gender shift hypothesis of same-sex sexual attraction in bisexual women, but not in lesbians nor in men. The finding that bisexuals are the sexual orientation group with the most pronounced Dark Triad profiles is opposite to what would be predicted by the prosociality hypothesis of same-sex sexual attraction. The life history and minority stress implications of these findings are discussed as alternative hypotheses to the gender shift hypothesis.

It contradicts the general trend where homosexual people tend to be more 'gendershifted' compared to straight people when measuring various psychological/personality stuff, and usually compared to bisexual people.

This was a pretty interesting finding too:

To our knowledge, this is the first such finding (besides bisexual men's higher sociosexuality and sex drive: Lippa, 2020) reporting a hypermasculine psychological profile in homosexual and bisexual men: most other findings indicate that homosexual men are feminized on most traits while being sex-typical on others (Allen & Robson, 2020; Barelds et al., 2017; Luoto, 2021a; Rahman & Wilson, 2003). It is possible that because bisexual and homosexual men are subject to greater amounts of discrimination and harsher treatment than heterosexual men are (Bailey et al., 2016; Cuerda-Galindo et al., 2017; Symons et al., 2017), this may prompt an adaptive response to be duplicitous, deceptive, and disguise themselves (i.e., Machiavellianism). Under this hypothesis, heightened Machiavellianism in nonheterosexual men would not be a pathology but, instead, a pseudopathology that can help
men with atypical sexual orientations navigate the dangerous or hostile social contexts they sometimes face.

, a picture starts to emerge that those who?by characterization of their sex (male) and sexual orientation (non-heterosexual)?may respond to local harshness by becoming more selfish, deceptive, and impulsive. On the other hand, this ?pseudopathology? view is challenged by findings that have revealed that while delinquent behavior is correlated with the Dark Triad traits (Alsheikh Ali, 2020), bisexual individuals had the highest rates of delinquency of all sexual orientation groups for both sexes (Beaver et al., 2016). This suggests that the pronounced Dark Triad profiles in bisexual individuals could contribute to their delinquent behavior.

Notably, these results are distinctly opposite from the predictions that arise from a recent hypothesis on the evolution of same-sex sexual attraction. Barron and Hare (2020) hypothesized that same-sex sexual attraction evolved as a suite of traits responding to strong selection for ease of social integration and prosocial behavior. This hypothesis leads to the prediction that non-heterosexual individuals should have a low prevalence of the Dark Triad traits?a prediction which was not supported by the current findings. The prosociality hypothesis may be lacking in overall evidentiary support (Luoto, 2020a; Luoto, 2021b), and the findings reported in this article further call into question the prosociality hypothesis of same-sex sexual attraction.

People tend to hate this hypothesis but I think it's probably just a sexual strategy since it's kind of obvious to me that it gives guys an advantage with some women to be bisexual and/or androgynous but you also have to navigate around heterosexual masculine men who tend to be really envious and aggressive towards that group so machivalenism would help (I guess that's more or less what they're suggesting anyway just without that potential explanation.) Also many women find bisexuality in men to be a turn off (but there are a bunch who clearly find it to be a turn on to the point of having a preference so.) It also works in several other species.

I mean later in this post you can see an example of that approach working with that calabai/calalai couple that decided to have a kid. Notice they didn't have a kid with.. What do they call the other genders? 'Oroane are loosely comparable to cisgender men, makkunrai to cisgender women.' There are also the bissu which seems to be more of a spiritual role.

For various reasons, Rani, Maman, Mapu', Eri, and Dilah identify as calalai'. It is not possible, therefore, to conclude that females transgress gender norms and become 'men' in order to fulfil their sexual desire for other women (i.e. that it is only by appearing as a man that women are given freedom to love other women).[39] For calalai' a masculine identity is often constructed before feelings of sexual desire develop. Nor can we conclude that for all calalai' same-sex desire naturally extends from a masculine gender.[40] For some calalai', same-sex sexual desire initiates masculine behaviour. Neither do females become calalai' primarily for economic reasons.[41] In identifying as masculine females calalai' do not reflect the values expected of women, namely to be feminine, to marry heterosexually, and to bear children. In rejecting this paradigm, calalai' search for alternative models on which to develop their identity. In asserting their preference for masculine tasks, and an erotic desire for women, calalai' in many ways emulate ideal forms of masculinity.[42] In the next section I want to examine how calalai' reflect masculinity and uphold hegemonic ideology.

I feel like a lot of people writing about this kind of thing try to emphasise economic and material explanations a lot of the time.

A calalai' called Ance' was married for a time to a 'calabai''[44] named Wawal who works in a small clothing shop. The couple have a 5-year-old daughter. Ance' talks of expectations in hir marriage:

We got married because two males, or two females,[45] can't have children.[46] At the start, Wawal did all the cooking and cleaning because s/he is a 'calabai'' and s/he knew all about that kind of stuff. I am a calalai' and I hate doing all that housework stuff, that's why I am calalai' because I want to live like a man. But Wawal was lazy. In the end s/he expected me to be the husband and the wife! But I have my daughter ... Wawal loved women's clothes, and the elaborate materials and buttons and lace. That was one of the things that really annoyed me, actually. Wawal spent so much money on clothes and makeup. I would work all day ... then I was a farmer ... and Wawal would just spend all the money. At this time, I guess our relationship started getting awkward. Wawal wanted me to be a mother and do all the housework, bathe the children, clean and dust. So I told hir that 'if you forbid me to be a man, then you will have to work and get the money so I can stay home with our daughter. How am I supposed to do two roles when you neither keep the house nor work for money?'

There was a pragmatic reason for Ance' and Wawal to get married and Ance' had clear ideas of what roles a wife and husband should perform. Wawal was the wife and so was expected to do the cooking and cleaning, which s/he did for a time. Ance', as a calalai' , was the husband and fulfilled the roles of such. As Strathern argues, 'The extent to which agents act for themselves or themselves cause others to act depends on what these selves are ... Another person may be the cause of action, not as one mind overriding another's, but in terms of the requirement of a relationship in which the presence of one party is necessary to and created by the other, and the necessity is construed as a matter of difference between them.'[47] It was, then, when Wawal became lazy and expected Ance' to be both wife and husband that problems arose. Their relationship worked while both parties performed the socially recognised roles of husband and wife. In this sense, while transgressing gender norms, Wawal and Ance' continued to reflect dominant ideology. Because the only available role model for Ance' and Wawal was that of husband and wife, their refusal to conform to gender norms based on their biological sex, encouraged them to replicate the normative model. It would be misleading to suggest however, that calalai' model their identity entirely on male masculinity. In the next section I want to examine how calalai' challenge normative masculinity.

I think it's harder to find people who want to do the maternal + housework role. That's become an issue for some couples in the West too.

Being masculine females, calalai' are able to explore spaces and perform tasks that women and men are prohibited from. Spending time in Maman's village I became involved in a conversation with hir ex-girlfriend, Mina:

It was great having a calalai' partner because s/he could go out at night alone. So if my mother was sick, s/he could go and buy medicine and s/he could bring it into the house, even when my dad wasn't home.[48]

Mina is glad that Maman is able to go out alone at night to buy medicine, and she also enjoys the fact that Maman can personally deliver the medicine. In the longer conversation, Mina emphasised how Maman is in essence just like a man [pokoknya lelaki]. It is clear, however, that Maman is not a man. While a boyfriend could easily purchase the medicine, he could not go inside the house and deliver it if only Mina and her mother were at home. Maman can enter the house without causing Mina's family to feel siri' (shame) because s/he is not a man. As Chabot notes, 'if [a girl] is alone at home or in the yard and a man enters the yard accidentally, a dangerous situation is created because this encounter, regardless of the intention of both parties, is considered a breach of established forms of social intercourse.'[49]

This is very peculiar lol. I wonder if they don't care about them going out alone at night or if they do but they just kind of ignore that and do it anyway lol?

She was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don't apply to you.


Meanwhile in the West:

*avoid telling my dad when I go to concerts at night alone now if I visit him, because he freaks out and worries endlessly.*

By examining access to social spaces we also see how calalai' take advantage of being masculine females:

Today Mariani, Rani, and I went to a wedding. The three of us are so free to move. Mariani (bissu)[50] and Rani (calalai' ) can move in women's spaces and into men's places because they are neither and yet both. Similarly, I have the position of foreign researcher that allows access to the men's arena, and I am a woman which allows access to the women's arena. Rani sat with the women in the kitchen for a while and cooked talibo (B) [a type of seafood]. Afterwards s/he moved to the front of the house and socialised with the men. Women and men are not able to do this travelling between spaces so easily.[51]

This seems in some ways better and some ways worse.

I like that it's clear, that people seem to 'get it' without questioning/confusion and without the ambiguity and necessary obfuscation we have in the West for political and ideological reasons. On the other hand a lot of the rules are restrictive.

There are expectations placed on calalai', though, and it is not simply a matter for them to pick and choose which rules they wish to observe. For instance, calalai' are expected to enact masculinity and discard feminine behaviours (even though Rani did help with the cooking at the wedding). Moreover, calalai' remain in an interstitial position, never accorded the rights and privileges of being a man (i.e. they only receive one third of inheritance as per Islamic law whereas sons receive two thirds) and nor do they command the honour and respect awarded upon motherhood.

In negotiating gender, calalai' in urban areas are developing ways of asserting a unique identity. One way of doing this is through bodily adornments. For Dilah, there are specific ways a calalai' must present hirself:

You can tell a hunter by hir style [gaya]. Hir hair has to be short, s/he can't wear makeup, and definitely no lipstick! And s/he must wear men's clothes

This is limiting since I usually prefer having long hair but don't wear makeup. Clothing varies. I don't actually wear men's clothing though mostly as it wouldn't fit. I wear unisex stuff and masculine female clothing but I've worn more feminine stuff and dresses and skirts before mostly as a teenager. That was kind of an exception even then. It had to be like alternative stuff. I was reading something on some goth subreddit a month ago or something and this was weirdly relatable lol:

Yeah I've found as a nonbinary person leaning into Goth and the fashion aspect of it has actually helped me a fair bit as it's given me new ways to express myself and I can approach things like say wearing 'typically feminine' clothing in a goth way which feels way more comfortable than doing so from a mainstream fashion way as it feels less like 'I'm a woman wearing a dress' it's more 'I'm a goth wearing a dress in a goth way'

It sounds fucking stupid but yeah. It's just because it's edgy/dark really lol. But these days I'm too lazy and don't really go out or anything so don't do that. It doesn't necessarily signal to others what it feels like in my head as well.

I love men's clothes. Men's clothes allow you to move; I always tie my sarong like a man because it's stronger and doesn't come undone when I am moving around. As for me, I am far too lazy to put on make-up or women's clothes. My hair used to be really short, like a man's, but now I can't be bothered cutting it. Even when I was still at school I never wore skirts. And that was hard because I was at an Islamic school where all the girls have to wear really long skirts. But I hated skirts and so I wore trousers. And this was o.k. except for when I tried to go and sit for an exam and the officials wouldn't let me enter. They told me I had to go home and change into a skirt. I didn't want to do this so I went and saw the Principle. So the Principle told the officials that it was all right because I always wore trousers!

But calalai' do not dress to be exactly like men, they often dress to assert a separate identity:

Having watched the sunset over Pantai Losari, Idham and I were walking home when we ran into Eri. S/he invited us to hang out at her house [ayo, main-main di rumah] because Dilah, and another calalai', Chappa, were there. We sat out the front of the house and chatted. Dilah commented on my earrings and asked if I always wore two. Dilah said that s/he only wears one in hir right ear because if s/he wore two then that would mean s/he was a 'real girl'. I asked why s/he didn't wear it in hir left ear and s/he said because s/he wasn't a man.[53]

I am actually wearing an earring in only my left ear right now but not on purpose I just lost the back to my other one lol and have been wearing this one randomly switching ears now and then for probably over a year now. I kept meaning to buy another pair of earrings but never got around to it. Also I don't want the holes to close up, not sure if they will now since I got them pierced when I was like 7 but it seems to vary a lot.

I don't know if this originated in multiple places separately but there is a thing in the UK where if you wear an earring in your right ear it 'means you're gay.' I don't think this happens everywhere in the Anglosphere? Cause this comedian at least hadn't heard about this and comes from Australia:



I remember hearing that when I was a kid though but this is only supposed to apply to men I think.

I also started reading another paper and this is quite restrictive (talking about calabai though not calalai):

https://www.academia.edu/3191600/Neg..._Bugis_Society

The link between gender and sexuality is certainly strong. In fact, the Mayor of Sengkang once said at a public speech, 'you would not be calabai' if you did not like men.' The Mayor signalled here that without a desire for men, calabai' would not be calabi.' Indeed, a calabai' who likes women is often considered to be a fake calabai':

Some calabai' like women, but they're not real calabai'. Real calabai' never like women. I am an authentic calabai' because I've never liked women.

It's this part that's very difficult for people who are further removed from group norms. Like the issue a lot of non-binary and bisexual people have among others.

In addition to sexual desire, the role one plays in sexual acts is important in gender identity (cf. Wikan, 1977; Kulick, 1997.) Dilah, a calalai,' states, 'we don't want to be penetrated. It's our role to penetrate our partners.' According to Dilah, women are sexually penetrated, and one way s/he differentiates hirself from women is by being the one who penetrates, not the penetrated. Similarly, Eka notes, 'calabai' are entered (dimasuk.) Men are never entered!'

Yes I am mostly the same, but more feminine I think overall. There are more feminine women with this sexuality in the West and Europe more generally I think. (I found someone like this posting on Reddit from Eastern Europe, they'd always been like that since childhood and said it was difficult because they were otherwise very feminine and liked having long hair and were attracted to men not women, though they did have some dysphoria regarding genitals and I think they said they would have preferred to be a guy too but didn't want to transition. Can't remember all the details of their post now.)

From these narratives, a clear link is evident between gender identity and sexual behaviour. Such examples reinforce the idea that bugis gender cannot be thought of as the result of one or two factors. Rather, it is the complex association of many intersecting elements. Western theory does not seem to equip one particularly well for analysing such interrelations. As Jackson argues, 'the theoretical split between gender and sexuality, which is now institutionalised in the disciplinary divide between feminism/women's studies and gay-queer studies, means that Western analysts are poorly equipped to understand gender/sex transformations at the global level.' Caught, therefore, between the split domains of feminism and gay-queer studies, the categories of gender and sexuality exist in an endless circuit of mutual referencing which rarely stops to provide an account of how they are related.' (Jackson 2000, p 418 ) It is essential, however, that these linkages be interrogated in any analysis of Bugis conceptualisation of gender.

I've really not been a fan of this. I know this system works for a lot of people but it doesn't for me.

I find it weird that the sex role aspect seems to be the least discussed element here (well we have issues with anything related to sexual expression/discussion,) but has caused me the most issues debatably lol. I don't even think heterosexual couples have a way of articulating this though probably getting there gradually since 'pegging' has become more popular recently I think? Talking about it online has anyway. I don't like that word personally since it's not used for lesbian sex and it was invented by a cis gay man. That kind of emphasis turns me off in some weird way (the heteronormativity I guess.)

Well that and the weird thing my brain does with other people's gender/sex traits in my imagination...

I also feel like not talking about it and not studying certain things mean there's kind of large gaps in knowledge that lead a lot of people I see online to go around in circles well into their 20s or later without figuring out the specific combination of how things work. Though sometimes it's also an attempt to avoid/repress things. I stumbled on an example on reddit recently which isn't the first example of that exact issue/sexuality thing I've come across, and it's frustrating because you realise how incapable Western sexuality communities are in general of helping/offering advice too because of the models they are using. They were posting on a bunch of subreddits but also not giving all the necessary info everytime I guess tbf. Too lazy to go into specifics it would require quoting a ton more stuff anyway.

Kind of tmi:

Spoiler: I'm not sure it's an exclusive preference but I don't like the idea of being penetrated and it's never been something I've fantasised about when engaging in 'certain activities.' I think I've vaguely considered it as a possibility if it was with a feminine woman with a strap on, or if I was with someone who mostly bottomed who I was very attracted to. Most of my sexual fantasies have been voyeuristic. Which made me question if I was some variant of asexual but asexual never really fit since I'm still very attracted to some people and sexually aroused by people, so I thought greysexual maybe.

But I also prefer the idea of topping and I guess the more I started to contemplate myself being involved actively the more that occured to me (otherwise I just mostly fantasised about myself and manual sex prob cause that was the one thing I was OK doing with my ex, but like fantasising about that with women too sometimes.)

It's more about the other person though but it's weird. I mean I've liked (over the years,) reading about women getting impregnated and various kink related stuff but never imagining it was me getting pregnant, and then mpreg doesn't generally work for me as a fantasy concept especially with more masculine guys I've found romantically attractive, or as a kink (I fantasised a bit about this as a teenager at certain points with some guys but then it was more a romantic thing,) so for a while I just thought I was only into that kind of thing with women (and it was actually a big thing I'd look for in erotica with women but surprisingly uncommon especially combined with my other kinks.) But recently I kind of liked audio stuff where guys would say they wanted the listener to get them pregnant and things like that. It's hard to find stuff like that though initially stumbled on it by accident while looking for stuff where women top men.

I dunno if I'd want to have strapon sex in real life though or if it would be as fulfilling. The visual and physiological components are all different irl, various logistical concerns. It's sort of a moot point unless I start dating and most men aren't into this. In a fantasy context it works better + the stuff I listen to obviously has constant communication with is a big thing for me anyway. It's why I like erotica and when I used to fantasise as a teenager even though there was a strong visual component like I'd imagine people wearing certain outfits etc - I also kind of imagined story text simultaneously generated by my brain in the daydream/fantasy kinda weird lol.

Can't really expect that while in a relationship either. My first ex who I did some things with (not intercourse,) never really spoke I'd just keep up a constant narrative instead based on erotica or whatever. This was not as satisfying of course.

When listening to stuff I'm not thinking about my body as much as the other person but it's kind of important that they refer to it not as a strap on. I feel bad now and then about not having a dick. Then I have some weird competitive feeling/envy with guys sometimes. But I feel like my brain works to repress a lot of these things + sex drive isn't always high. I'm sure I would have been better off with a male reproductive system though but then I don't really want to lose my current one either.

Also related to all this I've never really wanted to be pregnant or give birth although under different circumstances I probably would have liked to have kids. I wouldn't say that's just a gender thing either. Multiple things going on there.

What my brain does with other people's gender/sex traits has also always been weird... Like it's constantly trying to find some kind of compromise that works. It's not merely 'inverted' in some conventional transsexual sense where everything is the opposite. More like both genders/sexualities mushed together.

My first inkling into Bugis conceptualisations of gender came from a conversation I had with Eka, a calabai' in hir late twenties from the town of Sengkang. I asked Eka was s/he thought was the most important factor in hir identifying as calabai':

It's not like there is just one thing, it's like there are many things and they're all important. You see if you pull this bit out and that bit out what are you left with? Just a bunch of pieces that really make no sense. It's like one of those puzzles that doesn't mean anything until you put all the pieces together. Then you can see what it is. When there are just scattered pieces lying around, what do they mean? Once you put it all together you can see what it is and then you can ask questions: Who put it together? Who made the pieces? But there is no point asking these questions until you see it all put together.

[Doseone]

I had a dream that I was almost choking on a drill bit. It was in my throat, but I managed to cough it out. Also, I'm pretty sure that I've proved that if consciousness is physical/caused by the physical, we should have access to all the private subjective experiences of what brains are/produce. It's hard to put into words, though. You have to intuit it.

We have access to brains only in the objective sense; there is no way to confirm that subjective states (what it feels like) of other people are actually happening in the way we think they are. This is why studies on the brain use communication to know what people are experiencing. You'll never know what is going on in a person's mind from their unique subjective point of view. If you could, you'd literally be them and not you.

--

I started watching Twin Peaks: The Return a few days ago. It's a lot more captivating than I remember it being in the first 3 episodes. But honestly, I don't remember how I felt about it years ago. I was also looking at the letterboxd for it, and only 171k people "watched" it. I would have thought it would be millions. 171k is nothing.

[Nyctophilia]

@Doseone

I've never watched Twin Peaks but I've heard a lot of people talk about it over the years. I had the idea in the back of my head to watch it at some point but never really got around to it. I really like the landscape in Washington. Temperate rainforests are really pretty. There are some areas in that biome in the UK but I've never been to them (as far as I remember anyway. My family travelled more around the UK when I was a young kid.) Also why parts of Japan and Studio Ghibli films look really pretty.



Edit: I dunno if Shanklin Chine on the Isle of Wight counts. Probably not. I last went there in 2018 but I think I also went when I visited the island as a kid on a school trip in the early 2000s and seemed bigger and more rainforesty to me back then. Unless it was another area but I think it was that. So somewhat disappointing in comparison but still pretty. I might be getting a few things mixed up in my memory though because I bought some amethyst from somewhere and not sure it was there..









I wonder what is going on in this photo lol is that a doll?



OK I looked through the other photos on the website and somehow that's not a doll it's some kid wearing a veil? But they look like some kind of haunted doll in this photo.

"Excuse me. Your child is haunted."

It fits though because I think that was during some Halloween event.

[Nyctophilia]

Why do weird things keep happening? I've made a comment explaining.

No everything is boring. I was searching for how to find when weird events are happening. More specifically examples of spontaneous creativity that ideally (but not always,) have some real world impact. Maybe you can't know though since it's random and if irl sometimes illegal or a legal grey area. Examples off the top of my head:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Storm_Area_51

Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All of Us was an American Facebook event that took place on and around September 20, 2019, in the desert surrounding Area 51, a highly-classified United States Air Force (USAF) facility within the Nevada Test and Training Range.

The event, created as a sardonic shitpost by Matty Roberts on June 27, 2019, asked Facebook users to band together and raid the site in a search for extraterrestrial life that conspiracy lore claims may be concealed inside.[1] More than 2 million people responded "going" and 1.5 million "interested" on the event's page, which subsequently attracted widespread media attention and caused the event to become an Internet meme. Roberts later stated his intentions for the event had been purely comedic, and disavowed responsibility for any casualties had there been any actual attempt to raid the military base.

On the day of the event, only about 150 people were reported to have shown up at the two entrances to Area 51, with none succeeding in entering the site. Two music festivals were planned to coincide with the event: Alienstock in Rachel, Nevada, and Storm Area 51 Basecamp in Hiko, Nevada. An estimated 1,500 people attended these festivals, according to state and local law enforcement. Air Force spokeswoman Grace Manock stated government officials were briefed on the event and discouraged people from attempting to enter military property. Nevada law enforcement also warned potential participants against trespassing. The event had an effect on businesses both locally in Nevada and around the United States, which prepared products for visitors and those attending the event.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goncharov_(meme)

Goncharov is an internet meme surrounding a nonexistent 1973 gangster film of the same name. Goncharov was imagined by users on Tumblr as a joke, often with the tagline "The greatest mafia movie ever made". It is usually described as a mafia film set in Naples, with the involvement of movie director Martin Scorsese. Those discussing the film have devised a fictionalized cast list that includes Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, John Cazale, Gene Hackman, Cybill Shepherd and Harvey Keitel.

Goncharov initially originated when a Tumblr user posted a picture of a pair of "knockoff boots" that featured details suggesting the film's existence in place of a brand label. This post was reblogged in August 2020 with the joking allusion that Goncharov was a real film; this reblog is generally regarded as the genesis of the meme.[3] The meme went viral in November 2022, after a poster for Goncharov was created and shared online. This sparked an elaborate fiction of its narrative content and production, described in posts on Tumblr and elsewhere as if the film were real. Goncharov has inspired an online fandom, received significant coverage in the media, and garnered responses from notable individuals, including eventually Scorsese himself, generally playing along with the meme.

Goncharov picked up traction again in late November 2022 when Alex Korotchuk, a Prague-based artist, created a poster for the film that featured a lineup of actors, character names, and crew members, and posted it to Tumblr on November 18.[11] Korotchuk's poster went viral and inspired an elaborate fiction of the film's existence, based on the details it established.[1][6][2][15][14] Discussion of the film involved detailed critical analysis of the plot, themes, symbolism, and characters, as well as creation of gifs, fan art and erotic fan fiction,[6] all presented as if the film were real.[1] An American music teacher, with the help of at least thirty other people, composed theme music.[13] A Letterboxd page was created, and several "reviews" for Goncharov were posted there, but these were removed from the platform.[11][16][14] A public Google Document was created in order to collect and coordinate the various plot and metafictional elements that had developed about the film.[1] Archive of Our Own, a fan fiction site, had over 500 entries for Goncharov as of November 24, 2022.[17][14] On November 25, 2022, a game jam of Goncharov was run by Autumn Chen on itch.io,[17] inspired by the invention of a nonexistent videogame tie-in.[13]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isle_of_Wight_Festival

The Isle of Wight Festival is a British music festival which takes place annually in Newport on the Isle of Wight, England.[1] It was originally a counterculture event held from 1968 to 1970.[2][3]

The 1970 event was by far the largest of these early festivals and the unexpectedly high attendance levels led, in 1971, to Parliament adding a section to the Isle of Wight County Council Act 1971 preventing overnight open-air gatherings of more than 5,000 people on the island without a special licence from the council. The event was revived in 2002.[4]

[...]

The 1970 event was by far the largest of these early festivals; indeed it was said at the time to be one of the largest human gatherings in the world, with estimates of over 600,000, surpassing the attendance at Woodstock. Included in the line-up of over fifty performers were Jimi Hendrix, Miles Davis, The Doors, The Who, Lighthouse, Ten Years After, Terry Reid, Emerson, Lake & Palmer, Joni Mitchell, The Moody Blues, Melanie, Donovan, Gilberto Gil, Free, Chicago, Richie Havens, John Sebastian, Leonard Cohen, Jethro Tull, Taste (Irish band) and Tiny Tim. The unexpectedly high attendance levels led, in 1971, to Parliament adding a section to the Isle of Wight County Council Act 1971 preventing overnight open-air gatherings of more than 5,000 people on the island without a special licence from the council.[6]

https://blog.stonehenge-stone-circle...val-1972-1985/

The Stonehenge Free Festival, held at the ancient stones every June between 1974 and 1984 culminating with the summer solstice, was a cultural phenomenon.

By 1984 it had become the UKs premier free festival after many others were violently supressed. Founded on utopian ideals of unity and comradery the festival grew from a few people in 1974, to thousands in 1984. However, the festival’s reputation soon became marred by reports of violence, tribalism and drug use and the government decided to crack down on it. Stonehenge Free festival was eventually violently supressed by hundreds of policemen in a brutal clamp down that became known as the 'The Battle of the Beanfield'. No free festival has been held at Stonehenge since – although people have been allowed to congregate at the stones for the solstice since 1999. 35 years on, I wanted to look back at the origins of the free festival, its brutal suppression, and its lasting impact on the site.

The free festival movement started in the UK in the 1970s. Ostensibly, the festivals were a combination of music, arts and cultural activities, for which no admission was charged. With Britain facing high unemployment, the free festivals became a focal point for disenfranchised youth and the working class as well as melting pots of the British counterculture. This perhaps intensified during Thatcher’s tenure, when the counterculture, as well as the working classes were being squeezed even tighter. Having started as a small event in 1974, by the 1980s, the Stonehenge free festival had transformed into a major event, attracting up to 30,000 people in 1984 (although some estimates have it at 100,000). The festival had become a cultural magnet, attracting such artists as: The Damned, Dexys Midnight Runners, Hawkwind the Thompson Twins and Benjamin Zephaniah who all played for free amongst many others. Perhaps the most renowned counter-culture attendees were a group called the 'peace convoy' who have been described as 'Post punk urban squatters', although perhaps unsurprisingly, the general public viewed the festival attendees as hippies.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exodus_Collective

Exodus Collective was a community collective and sound system formed in 1992, in the Marsh Farm area of Luton, England. It organised free parties and became involved in housing, social exclusion, and community projects, founded upon the principle of DIY culture. The group squatted buildings and repeatedly came into conflict with Bedfordshire Police, which by 1995 had resulted in Bedfordshire County Council voting for a public inquiry into alleged police harassment. The license of a pub owned by the mother of people in the collective was revoked, a decision which was later overturned by a judicial review.

The collective occupied a disused farm and turned it into a community project which they later bought. The fortnightly raves in venues across Bedfordshire attracted up to 10,000 people and, especially during the Marsh Farm riots of 1995, served to defuse tensions locally. By 2000, the collective was holding licensed raves in agreement with landowners. The collective disbanded in 2000, later reforming under the name Leviticus. Some former members were then involved in the Marsh Farm Outreach community group, which successfully campaigned to build a local community centre.

Exodus as a sound system was formed on 5 June 1992, when the collective hosted a free party near woods in Dunstable, Bedfordshire, promoting it through word of mouth in local pubs. A few days earlier, founding member DJ Hazad had reclaimed some speaker cabinets which had been left in a rubbish bin, enlisting a friend to fit speakers in them. The collective was inspired by Luton dub sound system Gemini High Power.[1]: 188–189 

Exodus raised funds through donations and bar takings, reinvesting the money in equipment. By the time a third party was held on New Year's Eve 1992, it was estimated to have been attended by 10,000 people.[1]: 188  The collective named themselves after the track by Bob Marley and the Wailers, also adopting "Movement of Jah People" as their slogan.[2][3]: 84  A founding member of the collective, Glenn Jenkins, would become the most public face of the group, acting as its spokesperson.[4]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Free_party

A free party is a party "free" from the restrictions of the legal club scene, similar to the free festival movement. It typically involves a sound system playing electronic dance music from late at night until the time when the organisers decide to go home. A free party can be composed of just one system or of many and if the party becomes a festival, it becomes a teknival. This typically means that drugs are readily available. The word free in this context is used both to describe the entry fee and the lack of restrictions and law enforcement.

Motivations for organisers range from political protest to simply wanting to have fun. An example of free parties as political protest was their prominence during the M11 link road protest. At most parties no money is asked for entrance since the aim is not to make profit. However, at some (most often indoor) events it is requested at the door to make a donation to cover costs. Typically organisers make little profit or make a loss setting them up. The term free party is used more widely in Europe than in the US. In Canada and some parts of Europe they are also referred to as Freetekno parties. A free party might have once been described as a rave, and the origins of the two are similar. Since the birth of nightclubs in town centres in Europe the use of the word rave had largely fallen out of fashion; however, in recent times it is increasingly being used again.

The term squat party defines the free parties with secret indoor locations. The address is obtained on the day of the event personally from organizers as the buildings are squatted. The parties often last over 24 hours.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teknival

Teknivals (the word is a portmanteau of the words tekno and festival) are large free parties which take place for several days. They take place most often in Europe and are often illegal under various national or regional laws. They vary in size from dozens to thousands of people, depending on factors such as accessibility, reputation, weather, and law enforcement. The parties often take place in venues far away from residential areas such as squatted warehouses, empty military bases, beaches, forests or fields. The teknival phenomenon is a grassroots movement which has grown out of the rave, punk, reggae sound system and UK traveller scenes and spawned an entire subculture. Summer is the usual season for teknivals.

https://iai.tv/articles/the-crisis-o...vity-auid-2239

Research suggests that creativity has been declining over recent centuries; a trend which shows no sign of abating. But why is this the case? And is there a way of reviving creativity within the confines of the modern world? In this article, Peter Carruthers examines the origins of creativity, and argues that in order to reclaim this lost art, we must put down our devices, and allow our minds to wander again.

The (negative) effects of social media on mood have been much noticed and talked about. Equally important, perhaps, may be their negative effects on creativity. For the algorithms behind social-media sites are designed to attract, and to hold, eyeballs and attentional engagement. Since there is no room for minds to wander if attention is dominated by attention-grabbing social-media posts, that means there is less scope for creativity, too. The bottom line: people need to wean themselves off social media--and also to find sufficient unstructured time in their lives for mind-wandering--not just to improve their own mental health, but to restore or enhance their own creativity.

There's conflicting research on creativity and social media use.

https://www.emerald.com/insight/cont...0682/full/html

Purpose

The use of social media is an integral part of modern life, yet the impact of social media on creativity is a paradox. Drawing on the conservation of resources theory, the authors propose that social media, as an ecological condition, both nurture and deplete resources. Accordingly, the authors investigated two inconsistent mechanisms: creative self-efficacy and ego depletion

The results consistently showed that: (1) social media use had a positive impact on creativity in general; (2) social media use increased ego depletion and creative self-efficacy, which were two inconsistent mediators; (3) hedonic use of social media reduced the negative impact of cognitive use of social media on ego depletion.

Which makes sense at least if you consider 4chan and Tumblr to be social media (Tumblr barely counts since it's half way between social media and blogging.) They seem to encourage some degree of creativity at least.

The image Tumblr has (that Tumblr users partly reinforce to gatekeep the website afaict. 4chan does the same.) Actually keeps a lot of people from the site and stuck purely on twitter which is much, much worse. It's difficult to get off twitter because of it's addictive quality but imo people should not be happily making that their primary social media website based on some weird tribal reasoning (which I see lots of people on twitter do, and they don't like Tumblr because it's the girl/queer person/'sjw' site. I've also seen someone who has a lot of followers and a high profile job as an evo-psych psychologist has some real public presence - yeah that guy again lol - argue that twitter is where all the future important cultural decisions will be decided even though it's only a minority of the population of various countries using the website. That would be very sad, and terrible, and insane if true so I should fucking hope not.) But it's almost impossible to do anything creative on twitter, it is essentially just destructive. The best stuff I stumble on on twitter is just Aella because I have an interest in sexology, that account that was posting Tumblr-adj thoughts that Aella reblogs.

Uses of twitter for most people (I think it's theoretically possible to use the site in a different way but increasingly difficult especially since Elon took over):

1. It can be good for self promotion which is why I have an account for my YT channel and used to have one for my zazzle shop.

2. Anger/destruction/getting pissed off and fighting with people. It encourages us vs them thinking and I would say me vs the world thinking at this point for myself at least. This is the predominant use which is addictive.

3. Psychologically analysing people if you read through their tweet history - that can be interesting (this is considered a weird thing to do by people, and you will be mocked if you reveal you are doing it yet honestly it's a lot more interesting to learn things about people then just read one off tweets without more context.)

4. Observing the mind states of people who are your total opposite since the website tends to suggest to you people who disagree with you stuff that pisses you off. Andrew Tate said he felt like most of twitter was genderfluid people and this annoys him. One YouTube comment I read recently included a guy mentioning that his twitter was full of misandric tweets. I rarely see these unless someone else is retweeting them, because I don't really care about that. I care more about misogyny so I see more misogyny. I also see more transphobia, homophobia and people being against gender nonconformity. I know the misandry is there because I watch shoeonhead videos, because I still stumble on it rarely, and just understanding how the platform works.

^ This is the worst aspect of the platform though because it makes people think that everyone thinks those things and has the same opinions that are completely different to your own and they don't see the other terrible stuff people are saying. If there's one consistent thing it's that most of the ideas are terrible lol. This is basically the opposite of art funnily enough. 'You are alone in the world, and nobody thinks like you, everyone is your enemy.'

I don't think Instagram is very good either. I have only heard about creative stuff happening on YouTube, Tumblr, 4chan and Facebook (if you include storm area 51.) I think maybe some stuff happens now and then on tiktok and I've seen some creative and surreal stuff linked elsewhere from that site, but the format and restrictions of the platform (tiny short videos,) is not ideal imo.

Instagram must be very self contained though. Aside from people on other platforms having an instagram so you end up on the site that way (sometimes I've ended up on certain YouTubers pages to check things or seen screenshots on other sites,) and hearing about all of the women taking selfie shots, and the scam new/age goop/conspiracy type stuff, nothing about instagram ever ends up on any other website ime. I even ended up on pinterest via Google more often I think than instagram.

In my head for the most part (besides the few exceptions I listed,) instagram is set in a kind of permanent 2013 taking selfie shots of food/pumpkin spice latte girl kind of headspace. And then I imagine a rich woman taking photos of herself in a bikini at a beach. And someone's home library - but there's no plants and the lighting isn't interesting like on Tumblr - instead it's very minimalistic and all of the photos taken during the day. Ikea vibes.

Tumblr library (This is not the best example and this is actually an AI image lol... But I was just scrolling through stuff I'd reblogged in recent months lol):



I'm sure stuff like this does pop up on instagram. Just not what comes to mind. Even the article I'm going to quote in a minute has photos that reflect my image of instagram somehow lol.

But it's probable that more interesting things are happening on the site sometimes.

At one point I tried to follow a bunch of goth fashion accounts and things like that, but I just didn't go back to the website. I made an account to watch some IAMX thing that required an account and then they left all social media and I was barely on that site even then. Even back then I would just go on Tumblr if I wanted to look at photos, videos and other updates about musicians because they'd all end up getting posted there by various accounts anyway. I still use Tumblr and YouTube as my primary places to find photos and info of musicians lol. Second to that reddit. I've followed a bunch on twitter over the years but they basically never end up on my timeline. I think maybe one Steven Wilson or Porcupine Tree tweet ever ended up on my timeline. It was the one where someone maybe not him had uploaded a AI genderswap version of a photo of the band LOL. So you can see why that ended up on my timeline I suppose.

Also Ethel Cain deleted her tumblr account a few months ago apparently (she deleted her twitter account ages ago,) though I didn't notice until yesterday and that's a huge bummer because she had some really great posts. But I think she was getting messaged by annoying terfs, and also some weird messages from fans asking her where she'd moved to (like her exact location,) and that probably drove her off the site. I reblogged this:

tallahassee has this thing called the maglab which is a research facility in the woods outside town that houses the largest magnet in the entire world. when anything weird happens in town, everyone blames the magnet. it’s one of the things i miss most about living there, it was like living in an x-files episode. (not just because of the magnet but also because of the aliens in the woods behind the airport.)

10/10 this is the content I need in my life.

We all love Instagram, right? After all, we're all on it – from interior designers to artists, makers, stylists and writers. It's a friendly place, and visually attractive too, unlike the vipers' nests of pithily written content that other sites can become. Recently however, researchers at the University of Bath declared that social media is killing creativity. Apparently, scrolling mindlessly through posts, reels and stories prevents us from becoming so bored that we go and develop new passions or skills; instead, we languish contentedly in a moronic state of 'superficial boredom.' If this is true, then the news gets worse: the average amount of time internet users spent on social media last year is 147 minutes per day. Add all those minutes together, and I could – and perhaps should - have written a novel, or learnt to play the cello, read Proust in the original, or at least knitted something useful. No wonder there are people who do social media cleanses in January.

No lol. It's easily the social media site I've spent the least time on.

This is what I mean btw:





The bright white and primary colours + that shade of green of it all. In that photo there's an apple pillow. Of course there's an apple pillow. Primary school teacher meets Sigrid music videos from 6 years ago:





I don't hate all stuff like this. And we all like Iceland + Greenland houses and Aurora Skies in The Sims 3. Depends on details and overall effect I guess. Some of it bores me more than others.

You can find stuff like this on Tumblr in The Sims 4 custom content community making interior design sets for The Sims 4.

Pre-social media I had minimal motivation to continue doing things over time or to start doing things in the first place this is something I struggled with since childhood, and I think possibly also a lack of intelligence to make things work. Like even when I was practicing music I couldn't really self teach that well. So I'd dip in and out of different activities. I think perfectionism is really toxic now though so it's more important to do things then not do things.

Quora is appearing in my google search results more lately. Many years ago I thought it was a more sophisticated Q&A site because I mostly ended up there when searching for psychology related stuff and actual psychologists would pop up answering the questions. Other experts also seemed to respond to questions on the site with their credentials in their profile - which tbf could be fake. But now when I end up there there's a lot of stupid answers and viewpoints it's a lot more like Yahoo Answers was back in the day lol.

[Nyctophilia]

Men-do you like when women wear high heels?

They're hot as hell, and somehow still underestimated, to the point that really high heels that actually fit your feet comfortably should be a priority for women as far as foundations of a wardrobe go.

This is from an account I've stumbled on many times. I often see them responding to stuff on twitter. They're everywhere for some reason (edit: Think I've figured out why at least partly lol. Nightmare website.) and I was like 'wait that twitter account is a man?' I've seen them tweet a lot and swear they're not. (But also sometimes people respond to stuff anyway as they should.)

*browses*

Not that I'm doing much better; I'm on track to maybe have my first kid at 32. But if she proves to be maximally aggressive on it I could still become a grandparent by 50, which would be wild compared to the family dynamic I'm used to...

Are they sapphic? Vague, hypothetical.

So according to you wanting physical affection from my girlfriend proves I'm "actually retarded"? Huh? If that sounds logical or reasonable to you then there's something wrong with your brain. As in clinically disordered, that kind of wrong. Seek professional help.

Still vague could be hypothetical.

This is me, so much so I'm to the point where I'm most at peace with the idea of having a child on my own, sans partner. Unless the other person is about perfect for me I know I couldn't bear the risk.

I quite like feminitives myself. Boggles my mind why a woman would want to be an "aviator" or an "actor" when they could be an "aviatrix" or an "actress" instead; like, the latter are just ten times cooler.

Aviatrix sounds cool because of the x sound (for some weird reason x sounds at the end of words seem to have become a non-binary thing recently too. I already liked that before so it's a weird coincidence but I've been playing Runescape and they added the title Dux like a gender neutral version of Duke and I tried that but settled on duke because Dux just sounds like ducks and it doesn't sound right lol.)

Most feminine suffixes are diminutive or just don't sound as cool to me, so I don't like them that much. I definitely think sir is better than maam also better than dame if you have a knighthood in the UK. I realised recently that there's some trend in Star Trek where all officers are called sir so that's cool.

At one point some of my YouTube audience would comment things calling me queen and I didn't really like that. Hasn't happened in a while now. Sort of bothered me that it bothered me. I do think queen is mostly gender neutral now, just implies femininity sometimes, other times it's just to signal the speaker's femininity. Language is really confusing. But yeah it's not really what I'm going for.

In contexts where I feel like emphasising the female aspect of my identity like engaging in femdom than female terms are preferable (male terms are also fine at other times.) Mummy and daddy are equally terrible though (in a sexual/romantic context,) for reasons unrelated to gender. Don't like even subtle ageplay dynamics...

I'd prefer actor if I was one and talking about myself.

I think enchantress is a pretty word. I don't know about for myself just in general.

The softest and most gorgeous of girls really shouldn't be a vibe that plays well with the most exotic and fearsome of creatures, yet they do in beautiful counterpoint, making for something truly special, like John Collier's "Lilith".

That seems like some kind of common trope. Snakes are also used in this Doja Cat music video but she isn't soft really lol:



bringing down the class and what?

I'm not a woman, but thanks for proving to me that you're a misogynist piece of scum.

Whenever I get around to it the next story I'm writing is going to be a romp set in a college. A rich irony, since I'm a man who's never even attended a college, but it's not like I've ever gone to outer space or opened a wormhole before either, so whatever.

Yeah I think it's the way he writes (class signifiers, posts about high standards - he's dismissive) + the avatar. I've come across similar accounts that are female.

Huge snob though.

Utterly bizarre that so many of the replies and quote-tweets are calling me gay (as some sort of bullying tactic I assume?). For the record, the men on Manhattan Island looked even less attractive than the women...

I thought you were gay but in like the other way. Also I think most of the others aren't sapphic. They just sound sapphic.

I can't help but wonder if gays, incels, etc. are far more prevalent than we think, it's just that people tend to be expert at going through the motions and lying even to themselves. Because it seems that surprisingly few men even like women in any real sense.

Most men don't have good looks; most men don't have these winsome perfect personalities we're all told really matter. And now most men don't even have much money relative to the women they're wooing. So pray tell what do average men have to offer?

The real mystery is how average men have as easy a time finding dates as they actually do, though I wonder how much of that is cultural inertia from the social norm that young people "should" date, which seems to be gradually ebbing if zoomers' behavior is any indication...

These last few tweets and stuff like that is the other reason I assumed that.

Also someone posted a video of a guy interviewing a woman and asking why she was single at age 42 and she said because a week before her wedding a guy she was with for 9 years cheated on her so she broke up with him as she said she doesn't cheat herself and this guy is trying to argue with her that he probably loved her and was just looking for sex and asking her why she was 'so quick to throw 9 years away' lol.

If she cheated on him, the guy would definitely not be OK with it. Men are statistically more likely to cheat and less likely to forgive. The reason they don't ask besides that they're sure their partner will say no is because their partner might be like 'OK but then I get to have sex with someone else right?' And they don't want that. People try to argue that 'it's not the same for men and women, you're not supposed to care about sexual fidelity if it's a guy and he's committed.' Etc.

So yeah that guy responded to the video and this is true lol:

It's really just disgusting how we have a whole mass movement of men who are now overtly trying to gaslight and shame women into lowering their expectations into the gutter.

"He cheated on you before the wedding, wow did you consider maybe he was cheating because he loved you"

Whether it's correct or not I think I associate cheating with a lack of intelligence. Looking now there seems to be some suggested correlation... My parents relationship was bad and my dad cheated on my mum at least once apparently and so the lack of respect there and with other things that happened later doesn't really make me think it works. Don't think he ever really wanted to be married either. He didn't even want kids until we were born. (So to be clear this is something someone at some point would have put up with along with many other things. I believe that people born in the 80s onwards are less likely to settle, or to get stuck in long term situations they dislike.)

I don't really like the obvious double standard where people are just supposed to forgive men for cheating because 'that's just how men are,' then you get people who argue points like 'It proves that they're in high demand because everyone's into them which is attractive' uh no, the general fantasy for women seem to be a guy who has lots of options but doesn't take any of them that's the average fantasy for women but being the weido I am I seem to have a pattern of finding people and fictional characters more attractive if they're less popular relatively speaking or it's implied by people that they are but they have lots of attractive traits. Kind of like hipster sexuality lol...

As I said though he's a huge snob (which is also why he doesn't tolerate all the bs):

Honestly, I don't even want normies to have 6 kids. I want the smart, classy, beautiful, creative types among us to have 6 kids. Normies...I mean, there's already more than enough of them. We need better-quality people to build the future, not a zerg rush.

Huh. TIL if you prefer the next generation to be smart, classy, beautiful, and creative, you're GAY. 🙄 I mean, good god; this proposition shouldn't be remotely controversial. Who even wants the earth to be inherited by dumb, trashy, ugly, and unimaginative people!?

It's a shame.

I like ballet and in my five months of taking classes and lessons I haven't turned gay yet. 🙃

My ballet teacher says she once had a student who was super-muscular, and he could barely move when it came to even the most basic ballet exercises there are; no flexibility whatsoever. Rather remarkable.

The 'ballet thing' is cute ngl.

Why are we so intent on parading men around in women's clothes when they just look godawful on them? Is it some kind of humiliation ritual? An attempt to normalize ugliness? Erase masculinity?

They can look good. It's also somewhat subjective.

For women's hair, the longer the better. Just don't cut it short; even if you can "pull it off", you'd still be prettier with long hair.

Women in our society are deeply frightened of and uncomfortable with motherhood, largely because they've been indoctrinated since birth to be dime-store versions of men; notice how anything uniquely or distinctly feminine is off-putting to both our women and to our culture.

Someone else posted this lol:

I think this is one of the reasons the tranny thing has taken off. Trans women/female impersonators are feminine in dress and appearance to the point of absurdity. They're filling a void of beauty.

Good.

Lol I always think about this clip:



I do resent the idea that I should be hyper feminine and do things that go against my instincts because I have a female reproductive system. People with sexualities similar to mine in other parts of the world are far more masculine and you guys don't even grow out your hair.

I'm going to wait for a time to tell him that he should grow out his hair and adopt a more feminine aesthetic if I can. Cause I bet he doesn't really. (I prob won't I'll forget about this later lol.)

This is reminding me of the guy I knew (and sort of went on some dates with,) in uni hahaha. Like they're pretty feminine but they knitpick your non-feminine traits tries to get you to be more feminine (yes I realise the irony,) because they kind of worship femininity. Then they're sometimes more traditional but other times not (when I saved him from the spider,) and snobbish. Creative guy. Introduced me to cocktails. The combination of certain things is very frustrating. But I missed the opportunity back then to do what I'm thinking.

It's frustrating in part because I realised over the years that guys who are androgynous/feminine prefer feminine partners more than more masculine guys (I mean unless they're gay obviously.) They're mirroring what they're attracted to which I'm doing too sort of. I don't want to be super masculine but yeah I kind of 'act like a guy' and don't want to wear dresses or be super cute ideally. I've taken photos like that before like I had long black hair with a block fringe at one point probably inspired by him (even now I'm semi conscious of this it's still somewhat compulsive and just ends up happening somehow):



and looked very cute in the photo so I got a message complimenting me from this genderfluid person on a forum who was mostly into Asian women (I'm not Asian but it was a bit predictable lol.) Leaning into the cute thing worked well for me because of my bone structure. Like when I was at uni the guy who became obsessed with me who I kissed but shouldn't have (ended up on a date with him I didn't know was a date, first date actually. So that whole thing ended up being a disaster.) He liked the idea of me cosplaying this character (I never did):



It's an amazing piece of music. The absolutely terrible taste of some straight men.

Not a fan personally and not my ideal aesthetic. I don't like the excessive neoteny and I also always disliked looking young for my age. Tbf he had long hair (but he didn't really take care of it,) and he was skinny. (Like 80% of guys back then,) but it still felt wrong and he was emotionally unstable.

Some people actually want to be that person so trans anime girls have a market if they're into guys (assuming they can achieve their ideal look):

So... catgirl trans-girls are... I can't believe I'm about to explain this. They're trans women, usually attracted to women, who express their identity online through cloying, neotenous otaku memery. And my conscious reason for cringing at them is that I see these Japanese cartoon catgirls as a kind of visual baby-talk. An infantilized and unrealistic representation of femininity and womanhood that's designed to titillate nerdy boys. So when trans women identify with it, I cringe.

Like no, you can't become an anime girl Lily. [BEEP] your dreams.

Now look, I don't want to get sidetracked with a discussion of whether my opinions about catgirls are fair or correct. So don't listen to what I'm saying about catgirls, listen to what I'm feeling about catgirls. Listen to the contempt beneath my words. Because even if everything I'm saying is true, "catgirls are being cringe online" is a situation so inconsequential, that any amount of emotional energy spent on it is too much.

So why do I have this cringe fixation? Well according to the A-Log Theory of Morbid Cringing, we form obsessive and addictive contempt for people who have traits in common with us; people who make us uncomfortable because we see something of ourselves in them.

I don't cringe at them though even though I'm sometimes existentially horrified.

Anyway heels look good if someone isn't wearing anything else (as with most things this applies to anyone who is reasonably slim, and has long hair.) All my favourite softcore + hardcore porn photos involve people wearing heels (should also mention they were all goth looking people as well.) I'm not sure otherwise. I mean I'm sure they do a bunch of stuff unconsciously I've just not thought about it much.

I would never wear them personally because they [BEEP] up your feet and are annoying to walk in. Probably shouldn't wear them regularly but that's up to the individual as long as they know the risks.

What on earth about shoes could possibly be hot as hell? Very confused by this take. Is it for foot fetish people?

[Otherside]

Starting to see an awful lot of ads popup from my MP. "I am aiming to end street homelessness in your area, and a pledge to remove a width restriction.

We're about to have an election called, I think. Oh, here we go again.

[Doseone]

@Doseone

I've never watched Twin Peaks but I've heard a lot of people talk about it over the years. I had the idea in the back of my head to watch it at some point but never really got around to it. I really like the landscape in Washington. Temperate rainforests are really pretty. There are some areas in that biome in the UK but I've never been to them (as far as I remember anyway. My family travelled more around the UK when I was a young kid.) Also why parts of Japan and Studio Ghibli films look really pretty.

Yeah, it does seem to be popular online, which is why I was so surprised by the lack of viewership. According to wiki, the first two episodes had 500k viewers, then it dropped to 200-300k for most of the other episodes. The way it's talked about online, you'd think it would have hundreds of millions of fans. lol. It's probably just the overlap of "being online" and being a David Lynch fan. If you look up top directors, he's always listed. So people who use the internet to find films/shows are more likely to watch Twin Peaks. Idk, that's just my assumption. I'd also assume it's like the with music as well. 95% of the music I listen to is only because of the internet.

But yeah, I highly recommend it, especially if you're into weird stuff or surrealism. I also only watched it because an online friend recommended a long time ago. So when it was on Netflix, I decided to watch it finally. I think it was my introduction to David Lynch (that or Eraserhead). I've seen everything Lynch.

--

So it's been over a month since I've been doing physical therapy, and my back is still messed up. I need to ask for an MRI, because I got one in 2018 and was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease. But my doctor moved right after that, so I never bothered to doing anything about it. I just kind of lived with pain. Well, that's not entirely true, my doctor gave me a prescription for pain medication, which helped for a while, and then she moved and I never got a new doctor. I never got my records sent to anyone.

[Nyctophilia]

I started reading The Rosie Effect which is the sequel the other book I was reading (The Rosie Project) and the characters in this one are getting more obnoxious lol. First there was an environmentalist character who tells him not to reproduce. I dunno if people actually have conversations like this irl now but it sounds very online. I know very online conversations transfer into real life because my dad uses the word woke irl and talks about things now and then which is irritating (also why I think 'touching grass' can be a useless term because you can't necessarily escape all the issues with the internet now,) but yeah. There's a kind of culture war/political thread like with the first book that's somewhat background but kind of there in a way that feels very contemporary.

'I suppose you don't think about what sort of car you drive or where you shop.'

Her supposition was incorrect, as was the implication that I was environmentally irresponsible. I do not own a car. I ride a bike, use public transport or run. I have relatively few clothes. Under the Standardised Meal System, only recently abandoned, I had virtually zero waste in food and I now treated the efficient use of leftovers as a creative challenge. But I consider my contribution to reducing global warming negligible. My position on rectifying the problem seems to be unattractive to many environmentalists. I had no desire to spoil our lunch with unproductive arguments, but Lydia seemed to be already in irrational greenie mode, so, as with the sake, there was no point in holding back.

'We should be investing more in nuclear power,' I said. 'And finding technological solutions.'

'Such as?' said Lydia.

'Removing carbon from the atmosphere. Geoengineering. I've been reading about it. Incredibly interesting. Humans are poor at restraint but good at technology.'

'Do you know how abhorrent I find that type of thinking?' said Lydia. 'Do whatever you like and hope that someone will come along and fix it. And get rich doing it. Are you going to save the tuna that way too?'

'Of course! It's highly possible we could genetically engineer the yellowfin tuna to taste like bluefin. Classic example of a technological solution to a problem created by humans. I would volunteer for the tasting panel.'

There's a YouTube channel my brother told me about. I guess it's The Thought Emporium looking now. Where they were growing a fish plant or something like that. I can't find this video though but I did find this:



The vegetable fish concept seems to be mentioned in this video. I don't know I thought he mentioned a fish/plant hybrid but maybe that was a further update or I'm just getting mixed up with something else.

There was a woman in a video I stumbled on years ago but I don't remember well now and haven't been able to find the video for years so it was possibly removed. She was making some kind of testosterone plant I think? I found the video around the time I was looking into left accelerationism and xenofeminism in 2017-2018~ I just don't remember enough details now. Testosterone is also a controlled substance in much of the world. Of course you can get testosterone from some plants anyway but it was something more than that I dunno now though like I say.

We made a meat-leaf. What more really needs to be said? Well it's also a demonstration of the cutting edge of regenerative medicine, and bioengineering. And maybe the first stop on the road to meat-robots.

This is actually really cool though. I used to doodle stuff like this when I was a teenager in the 2000s but for more aesthetic reasons as usual (you can also see the mention of circuit boards and things like that because as I said a few times I was weirdly fixated on them at the time too along with plant hybrids):



Very sane. The drawing is obviously really crap too lol that wasn't really the point though.

Also reminds me of that episode of Bob's Burgers where Gene is telling the story about the alien trees who look like meat trees with the 'Glam-eridoo':



I can't find a decent quality clip with the song during the scene. There's a clip of it playing during the credits:



Back to quoting though:

'You're actually not trying to upset me, are you?' she said. 'You're really not. You're just so insensitive you don't know what you're doing.'

'Correct.' It was easiest to tell the truth and I was relieved that Lydia did not consider me malicious. I saw no logical reason why a concern about sustainability should be a predictor of what I assumed was an objection to the treatment of farmed poultry. I consider it wrong to stereotype people, but it might have been useful in this situation.

'I've met people like you,' she said. 'Professionally.'

'You're a geneticist?'

'I'm a social worker.' 'Lydia,' said [...]

The other character starts talking about a book he's writing:

Seymour smiled. 'It's about growing meat in laboratories. So vegetarians can have a guilt-free burger.' I began to respond to this unexpectedly interesting topic but Isaac interrupted. 'I don't think this is the right time for a joke, Seymour. Seymour's book is about guilt, but not about burgers.'

This would have really frustrated me if it was a topic I was interested in lol.

'Actually I do mention lab burgers. As an example of how complex these issues are and the way deeply rooted prejudices come into play. We need to be more open to thinking outside the box. That's all Don's been saying.'

This was essentially correct, but it started Lydia off again.

'That's not what I'm complaining about. He's entitled to an opinion. I let the evolutionary psychology stuff go before, even though it's crap. I'm talking about his insensitivity.'

'We need truth-tellers,' said Seymour. 'We need technical people. If my plane's going down, I want someone like Don at the controls.' I would have assumed he would want an expert pilot rather than a geneticist flying the plane, but I guessed he was attempting to make a point about emotions interfering with rational behaviour. I noted it for future use as perhaps less confronting than the story about the crying baby and the gun.

'You want some guy with Asperger's flying your plane?' said Lydia. 'Better than someone who uses words they don?t understand,' said Seymour.

Then a bit later the character Seymour questions him about a bunch of stuff, concludes he's not autistic and then the other character does this:

'Screw you,' said Lydia. She was talking to Seymour, not Judy. 'You need to pull your head out of your diagnostic manual and go into the street. Go visit some real people's homes and see what your airline pilots do.'

She stood and picked up her bag. 'Order whatever you want.' She turned to me. 'I?m sorry. It's not your fault. You're not going to undo whatever trauma happened in your childhood. But don't let some fat little shrink tell you it doesn't matter. And do me and the world one favour.'

I assumed she was going to mention the bluefin tuna again. I was wrong. 'Don't ever have children.'

The funny thing is it's not clear if she's telling him not to have children because the character is autistic or because it's common for people to suggest not having kids for environmental reasons.

Then the Gene character returns in this book (the evo-psych professor.) Spoiler: at this point his marriage has broken down and he moved in with the main character and his wife because after he agreed to not continue having sex with other women as his wife didn't want an open relationship anymore he cheated anyway and he actually uses the word alpha repeatedly lol.

The thing is if you have to call yourself one and if few women respect you (and the in universe women don't,) you obviously aren't. I thought this response was really funny (that character is a musician but don't think I'd really call them a rockstar.) They're not super famous. If I was there I would have started some weird monologue about how music is attractive separate from status according to research so a reasonably well off and competent musician is generally going to be more attractive than an academic like him. xD Unfortunately my experience on twitter has led me to conclude that evo-psych professors really are often obnoxious, kind of snobbish and elitist. But then a lot of people are on twitter.

'How can I put this?' said Gene. 'There's a hierarchy. The further up the pecking order you go, the more women are available to you. A colleague of ours is head of the Medical Research Institute in Melbourne and he just got caught with his pants down almost literally. Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.? Gene was referring to my co-researcher in Melbourne, Simon Lefebvre, and it was good to know that he now regarded him as a 'nice guy'. In the past there had been some unhealthy competitiveness. Gene poured the last of the wine. ?So, no offence, but Don is an associate professor and I?m a department head. I?m at about the same level as Lefebvre, but up the ladder from Don. I probably don't get as many opportunities as Lefebvre, whose dedication to the task is an example to all of us, but I get more than Don.?

'And I'm a refrigeration engineer, which is lower than both of you,' said Dave. 'In terms of the social hierarchy, that's probably true. It doesn't make you any less worthwhile as a person. If I need my fridge fixed, I'm not going to call Lefebvre, but on average someone in your profession is going to get fewer opportunities for sex with women who are unconsciously ? or consciously for that matter ? focused on status. You're probably a better man than I am in lots of ways, but in this group I'm the alpha male.'

Gene turned to George. 'Sorry, squire, I'm being presumptuous. I'm assuming you're not the vice chancellor of Cambridge or an international soccer player.'

'Too dumb for the first,' he said. 'Would've liked to be the second. Got a try-out with Norwich, not good enough.' The waiter brought the bill and George grabbed it, put a pile of notes on it, and stood up.

George, Gene and I took a taxi back to the apartment building. When the elevator doors had closed in front of George, Gene said, 'A free meal. Shows what a guy will do to challenge the alpha male. Do you know what he does for a living?'

'Rock star,' I said.

The bolded part is also painfully cringe.

More stuff along the lines of what I was saying:

Since the day Rosie and I participated in a wedding ceremony in a church in memory of Rosie's atheist mother's Irish ancestry - with her father, Phil, performing a 'giving away' ritual that surely violated Rosie's feminist philosophy, Rosie wearing an extraordinary white dress and veil that she planned never to use again, and escaping having chopped-up coloured paper thrown over us only because of a (sensible) regulation – I had learned that, in marriage, reason frequently had to take second place to harmony. I would have agreed to the confetti if it had been permitted.

Putting spoilery stuff under spoiler tag (guess not really a major spoiler since it's revealed pretty early and maybe even in book description but yeah):

'Seems like excellent advice. I’ll tell Rosie.'

'Don’t tell her it came from me.' The Dean of Medicine, our sponsor, an Spoiler: experienced parent. Could there be anyone with greater authority to offer advice on balancing medical studies and Spoiler: parenthood? Yet I suspected he was right in recommending I not mention his name. Rosie would instinctively reject the advice of an older male in authority.

My prediction was correct. 'I'm not taking a year out of the program,' Rosie said when I presented David's advice that evening without citing its source.

'You know, you may get away with it. Rosie's a rusted-on feminist, so philosophically she wants you to wear a skirt, but she also thinks she's Superwoman. Independence is an Australian female trait. She'll want to do it all.' Gene drained his Midori and refilled both glasses. Spoiler: 'Whatever women say, they're biologically bonded to the baby in a way we’re not. It won't even recognise you for the first few months. So don't worry about that. Look ahead to when it’s a toddler and you can interact.

He's a very irritating character lol. It's made worse, probably intentionally, by his own personal failures.

[Nyctophilia]

He deserved better than this

At the same time the only reason anyone would ever talk about him is his sister. And now there's apparently some anime character based on him. Unlike all the other soldiers who just died completely unknown.

I feel like Sappho when I'm using X.

Right to jail. Lol I like how all the responses to this tweet were like that too. 'Unfollowed' etc.

Lol this guy has Paul Dano in his profile pic, among other things.

Also retweeted something about Johnny Greenwood. This post is now already about several things.

how the [BEEP] does jonny greenwood still look like that

Same thought 4 years ago

Sometime around I think 2015? Let me see if I can check before I continue. Oh 2017. So I was 26. That's very disappointing. Or I don't care. I don't know.

OK. I had a dream:

I was in a three way relationship with 90s era Jonny Greenwood and Thom Yorke from Radiohead. Though I mostly just hung out with Jonny in the dream.

We didn't have sex, it was pg-13 stuff.

Then in another part of the dream I was in a shop buying things, put some crepes in the basket at one point, very mundane. Other stuff happened though but I've forgotten now.

Which is simultaneously the most boring and amazing dream. Or it would be but all kinds of famous people have popped up in my dreams over the years. I only remember this one factually now though, not visually or emotionally. Disappointing.

I was confused about the years I think because around 2014 I had a really bad crush on someone online that was kind of painful, and I was also listening to a bunch of Radiohead and this song in particular still reminds me of them (later on I started actually talking to them online which helped with the crush and then eventually I drifted to crushing on someone else so it's fine):



And I thought I was done with Radiohead after the Sisters of Mercy era in 2016~ but you're never done with Radiohead. (I mean I thought I just wasn't listening to them as much not an active decision.) Also I suppose that makes no sense at all because I was listening to A Moon Shaped Pool in 2016 and that inspired my last attempt at getting into music creation before I gave up again not long after.

He?s feeding on Thom?s lifeforce

Tbf if you put it like that I feel like Thom looks younger in 2010 than he did in 1997. Jonny's trick has mostly been to cover his face with hair.

I feel like this has somehow transcended gen Z dead vibes and somehow fallen into some weird zillennial thing. So I don't hate it. Congrats.



And he is a Zillennial because he was born in 1994.

This caption lol:

Go give us nothing

I also feel like there's glitter on those jeans (but as Radiohead said 'just cause you feel it doesn't mean it's there, and I can't tell for sure,) and I just want everyone to know that I invented glitter jeans at Christmas when all of the glitter from something I opened ended up all over my black jeans and so I just left it there.

I want compensation from Marc Jacobs.

Also I see it's that guy. I stumbled on him once a long time ago (it can't have been that long ago though but you know. I thought it was before the pandemic but looking at when I saved this photo it might have been last year wtf? What even is time) on twitter or something and never paid attention to whatever it is he does. But I did save this one image I found of him:



'bladee cute'

That was the file name. I'm ambivalent though.

And now I know who bladee is again. Someone said they didn't want to hear about Barbie they wanted to hear about Bladee or something. Lots of tweets about Barbie's Oscar thing.

He looks like he works at the mall

mall kid culture doesn't exist anymore but the youngins love the fashion so it just looks bizarre out of context

bro the mall culture days of old

The mall culture days of old was me trying to buy Ghost in the Shell on dvd when I was 16 and being asked for ID even though it was 15 rated but I didn't have ID on me because this was the first time that happened and it didn't occur to me. So I left the shop and my friend went back in to try and buy it for me but they knew what she was doing and chucked her out. And then I avoided ever shopping in HMV again because I was raging against the machine.

It's actually crazy that a relative of Jeanne d'Arc, a descendant of her brother Pierre d'Arc, is still alive today.

Is there some reason everyone in this circle of twitter I'm browsing right now is talking about them today?

Also it's happening again:

This is why I can't stand sportsball bros.

They'll suffer for billionaire owned corporations to worship 19 year olds playing children's games but would never lift a finger to self-sacrifice for their own people.

These are the "men" of the land.
Domesticated pets.

'sports is now gay.' Is the trippiest thing to happen in the last decade.

I'm still trying to find out if this is just what nerds larping do now or not.

[Doseone]

I can't watch rap battles anymore. I used to be obsessed with them and would even buy ppv's for some events. Idk why, I just lost interest. I don't watch anything with the frequency that I used to. In fact, it's hard for me to become interested in most subjects. The last thing I became obsessed with was advaita vedanta. I've watched so many videos about that. I watched this earlier today, though, and it's still classic.



supa.gif

LOL

edit:
Also, in Genesis it says God created the moon for the purpose of light...why didn't he just teach people about electricity? That sounds like a man-made story written by scientifically ignorant people.

[Nyctophilia]

Someone posted a tweet about AI Taylor Swift porn (which I think was created by a black woman but the account has been suspended now and people are arguing about who did it.) And this MGTOW guy (who I noticed after clicking on his profile just tweets about misandry,) came along to post some things:

It's hard to explain but the fact that she probably hates these images being out there makes it hotter

He wasn't explaining the phenomenon btw he was trying to trigger people especially women. I'm not going to quote everything and all his responses to people though but that was what he was doing.

So the rest of this post is insane (I've tried to limit the insanity somewhat but still insane,) and if you don't like gender war stuff I wouldn't read it I needed to do this for psychological reasons though.

He was agreeing with everything bad that people were accusing him of. And one person was like I'm gonna neuter you etc and then some other assholes came along and were like:

Spoiler:

It just makes it hilarious and makes me wanna share and spread em even more. It's time to make that [BEEP] uncomfortable

I should imagine so because no one wants to have sex with you, but most women want to have sex with Taylor Swift or would if she offered even if they're ambivalent or have never thought it let's be frank. She inspires rage because she's high status and she won't [BEEP] you and she will steal your girlfriend even if she doesn't want to. She already has. It's beautiful.

Someone suggested BDSM in a sardonic kind of way, others responded that isn't real so doesn't work.

Lots of tweets from women like this:

It's actually not hard to explain. Men have "humiliating women" kink, because they hate women, and find excitement in publicly putting them down and making them feel uncomfortable. It is pleasurable to make women suffer. Thank you for explaining sexual violence so concisely.

Well at least you're proving why women should distrust men & stay single forever instead of getting married. Next time some man baby cries about being single & why no women want him, I?ll just refer him to this post of

Also lol someone responding to him has been suspended in the last few hours. I think they told him they were going to enact violence on his being or something. Except I know that's not it because several other people already did that but maybe no one reported them. He called that account a twink in response so maybe it was some gay or trans person. I don't know what it is that caused that account to be suspended because frankly the whole thing is a shitshow as it is lol. Like what did he say to him that was worse then everything else happening there lol? It's the craziest tweet thread I've seen in a while.

Then one person was like 'I think all men should start off in jail and prove their way out' and they actually posted like a screenshot of a tweet or something saying that so this is apparently a response that is frequently posted like a meme. Which is what Jordan Peterson complains about:



Can you blame them though? Like maybe not all men I think we should award the masochists, but in moments like this it's like eh. It's an appropriate response to [BEEP] like this.

I have this feeling that some people see stuff like this daily. Hours every day. I see lots of messed up stuff on twitter but I'm not quite in the circle I think where I see the most insane misogyny daily. I see a lot of racist stuff it's split and mixed somewhat. Like twitter is hell that has several layers and what I'm saying is it's really bad for me, but I don't think I'm on the bottom layer.

The funny thing is when some men on twitter are like 'all men think like this but you need us to keep the other men in check because we don't act on the monstrous urges' like that idealistic guy I quoted days ago:

Spoiler:

They find it appalling that without our civilization they would be raped and subjegated and it is only this concept this social structure that stands in the way of all that. They find men disgusting in response and want to use that as reason to stay away from men. I even read arguments after women made this discovery that they wanted men to be locked away (without considering who would lock them away lol), but anyway, they were getting so close but just kept missing it.

What they don't realize, is that they want the strong men, the men capable of over powering them of domineering everything, to be the ones that keep the other men in check. They want the noble aristocratic men to keep the weak men like the man in that Reddit thread in his place. The men capable of total destruction who instead use it to uphold civilization are the ones who keep this together for them, yet they are what are villainized in their minds.

However, it is the arguments for "equality" and virtue" that actually (when they succeed) allow the Reddit would-be rapist type of man to have equal or even extended social/societal power and leverage over the men that actually created and maintained that which granted these women their social safety and protection in the first place.

Yet ironically, to them equality and virtues sound nice, to they inadvertently relinquish the power to that which protects them to that which is most tyrannical to take and destroy from them, simply because the rhetoric is that powerful among their unsuspecting ears. It's really quite vicious, malevolent stuff. But that's what's really going on here, and that's what this quote says plus so much more in that one sentence.

The average woman isn't Solanas no. They seem less predatory to me too.

Solanas is misunderstood and I think she's misunderstood because what she actually was proposing was so much worse from the pov of most men then what they accuse her of. And most women don't understand her either I think they tend to minimise what she was saying because they're uncomfortable with the depths of her thoughts. Sometimes people claim it's satirical (and she went back and forth on that too post-ironic,) though most don't these days.

The only person I think who understood her is this one trans woman who wrote about her being inspiring to them. And all the men who showed up to that one SCUM manifesto meetup group she allegedly held where no women showed up.

Spoiler:

The f**, who accepts his maleness, that is, his passivity and total sexuality, his femininity, is also best served by women being truly female, as it would then be easier for him to be male, feminine. If men were wise they would seek to become really female, would do intensive biological research that would lead to men, by means of operations on the brain and nervous system, being able to be transformed in psyche, as well as body, into women.

Even then I feel like Solanas could have been worse. Her sadism felt detached from sexuality (though less detached in that play she wrote.) I'm looking for rock bottom.

Edit: just realised someone also brought up Solanas in reference to his tweet lol kudos.

But yes so you have the strong men who control other men's behaviour but they're still - theoretically - a monster then internally and women who never learnt to be monsters shouldn't have to put up with you if they don't want to should they? At least while they're repressed. Also it's not very hot when you're the object so of course no one likes that.

As Amanda Palmer said while aggressively breaking pianos (and knowing that she broke a piano playing this song really adds to the vibe):



'I am still not getting what I want.'

But none of this is what I wanted to say.

You see that twitter guy and the other guys responding edgily really thought he/they did something here and all the women and some trans people responding were triggered by his comments and saying men should be locked up, violently threatening him, and just pointing out that men are terrible. If you wanted to use Warhammer 40k as a metaphor or whatever it's a whole lot of khorne not much Slaanesh. So I was just like my time has come.

And I told him about how women get off Spoiler: to straight men being forced to have gay sex against their will. (Multiple genres like this.)

And the wonderful thing about this is. It's true. And they keep making this content. Also the feminisation of course.

In fact it seems like women suppress how monstrous they really are or culture forces them to. They're repressed as fuck.



Men try to pretend this isn't a thing and that women are innocent and pure (conservatives especially,) even when they argue women are evil it's in some kind of castrated way. They're socially not sexually evil. And I suppose I sympathise with your rose tinted glasses. I worry sometimes that men are nicer than they pretend to be. That they're trying to defend themselves because they've had negative experiences with women. You know like this quote but instead of strength it's 'evil':

"Men's greatest weakness is their facade of strength, and women's greatest strength is their facade of weakness." - Warren Farrell

Maybe women are repressed for a reason? Maybe everyone is but it's just more successful on women? Who can say?

Some guy responded with this:

We try to be feminists, but then you say "yes" to a hag whining/fantasizing all men are rapists and everyone loses their mind

I don't think the OP or some people responding did it for that reason though. It's not fun when they're just trying to make some point. 'You think I'm bad but I'm not.' I see men comment that they dislike a lot of fetish stuff and porn in general because it's cynical. Has nothing to do with love etc. Accurate. Perhaps some people (men and women,) are innocent. You can't really know, and so perhaps those people as I said shouldn't have to put up with monsters?

Feminists and other women sometimes try to rationalise anything they find 'it's a defence thing' they like yaoi and nisu stuff (in China,) and slash etc (these are the only things we talk about cartoonish stuff and tbf they are more popular,) because of *tries to spin this into some positive thing or something that makes men look bad.* It's always a response to something men do. I don't think so. Not entirely. My interests predate my full realisation of this nightmare.

I personally have enjoyed many fantasies in my life.

As for twitter guy.

You thought you did something here bitch. I'm more of a monster than you.

But I have some rules (these don't make me a better person.) So I'm not making and posting the AI porn images of my favourite straight male musicians having gay sex yet. But someone will do this with some guy eventually. It's almost inevitable. And they'll probably be on Tumblr lol. Or whatever the next gen version of that is. And after the first time it happens it will spiral and increase. It won't even be the hot androgynous ones they have soft feelings about that conflict with the aggressive urges. Eventually it will be guys they're not even into just to annoy you. And everytime someone tries to post 'revenge porn' some girl will do the same thing in return to the boys they know. And not just porn, all kinds of things will happen, because women are great at revenge.

You think you're being emasculated now? I wouldn't push 'Tumblr.' There's so little holding them back. Frankly they're not controlling themselves well as it is. There are men on that website who appear to be cisgender and are clearly lost and complaining about people writing about their favourite drummer getting [redacted] in the [redacted]

Tbh Tumblr (the stereotype, there are many people on Tumblr of course,) are probably nicer than the really repressed women who are everywhere else online. And part of that is probably just that many argumentative people left for twitter years ago, and you're not being constantly rage baited on that website if you're an average user like on other websites.

But also.

Imagine a woman who barely likes sex or even the idea of it. Maybe she reads romance stuff, seems to have no aggressive urges, reads posts from men online and gets horrified. But she has no desires either because she thinks that's bad or because there's just really nothing there. So she can't relate on any level she can't think:

"oh yeah I read mind control erotica where men and women are forced to do things they don't want, and kind of lust after famous guys and have to stop myself reading gay porn about them when they're straight and feminising them using AI and I've technically failed that and posted images online of feminised Loki but I justify it by explaining he's a fictional character even if he's played by a straight actor and besides the character is genderfluid anyway. And someone made a bunch of comics of Steven Wilson where he's kind of written as a woman or at least feminised (in a kind of androgynous space,) which would probably make him feel uncomfortable (though someone in Porcupine Tree did upload a AI image of themselves as women on twitter anyway which everyone responded 'wtf/this is funny' to. Yes... Funny...) And I still go back to that one comic now and again even though I think this is ultimately unethical as it would probably make him uncomfortable, because I like how he was drawn."

Yeah that's not her. This is her:

I can say with certainty that every man who likes this content would rape a woman given the opportunity and that they would face no consequences for doing so

Well you should not say that because people understand the difference between fantasy and reality.

You're already violating a living real woman for said fantasy. You're a rapist And fantasy violation means you find sexually violating women to be arousing. That's 3 rapists strikes and it's not baseball. 1 and you're someone women
Should avoid.

When tf did I even say I was aroused by this? Also you're using "violation" very loosely

That's violation 100% Taylor didn't consent for those images to be made of her. The fact you don?t understand this means you don't understand consent at all! Rapist strike 4

I'm on the fence over whether such images should be allowed and the morally prudent thing would be not to make them, but to say that anyone liking it would rape a woman in real life is a harmful blurring of the lines between fantasy and reality.

They are fantasying about the abuse of women. They would rape women.

This you? [link to a webpage saying piv is always rape]

That image is abuse. To like it is to perpetuate the abuse. There?s only one reason to do so. You're a misogynist who gets off on the sexual degradation of women.

And they go back and forth a bunch and someone else eventually comes along and asks this:

Is masturbating while thinking about a women (who didn't consent to be in my masturbatory fantasy) also rape?

And another woman responds:

not necessarily but its pretty fucken gross and we should keep you on a list

https://www.contrapoints.com/transcripts/shame

But notice how excitement at the attention and the flattery of being desired is not the same thing as attraction to men. There's a difference between "I want you" and "I like that you want me."

And I was able to convince myself that that was normal, because the sexual situation of a lot of cis straight women isn't really that much more liberated. Like, I read 50 Shades of Grey years ago, and totally identified with the fantasy. And later I thought that was evidence that I had normative female desires, nevermind that I was identifying with the midlife crisis fantasies of a repressed English housewife longing to be brutalized by a capitalist tyrant.

I mean, not to shame women who genuinely do enjoy a healthier version of that fantasy; I think a lot of women pointlessly suffer under a kind of feminist guilt about that. But what makes me different is that for me, submission to a man was simply the only way I could enjoy sex without shame. And that's a lot of what I did for a couple years, even though my real sexual attraction is to women. Whereas, even in the most patriarchal situation, straight women are ultimately attracted to men, and sexually aroused by male bodies.

Or are they? Gay men certainly are, and gay women are just rhapsodic about women, but a lot of straight women are just kind of 'meh' about male bodies and men in general. What is that about? 🧐I just... I just do not understand straight women. I don't think I ever will. And that's okay. I'm just gonna accept my bewilderment, and move on with my lesbian life.

(She didn't move on lol. And has made content about this since then on Patreon. Nor can anyone online really move on now.)

So this woman starts out as one of the teen girls who thinks fanfiction is weird and denies masturbating when in a room with no boys. My entire teen years was basically no one irl talking about sex or anything sexual except in a 'I accidentally watched this hentai film that's crazy man' kind of thing and even that was only one girl. So I was led to believe that I was singular and weird except for all the people like me online of course. Sexual stuff was probably happening behind the scenes but I hung out with this one girl - the girl who watched that hentai and we were close and she dated so many guys when we were teenagers. I think one was quite a bit older (two were but one of those relationships lasted like a week so.) And not once did she ever talk about sex. At all. Ever. Tons of guys.

There were girls who expressed themselves in more sexualised ways. Even then not really and besides I spent most of my time at school where there were school uniforms. But you know some girls wore thongs to school things like that. Obviously I wasn't in those circles the girl I knew who dated lots of guys was tomboyish. But there's still this idea culturally that you hear about online as well that attention is the female equivalent of sex. I'm the opposite of an exhibitionist though sexually speaking (quite voyeuristic,) so that was never going to work for me. Yes apparently I'm going to post a music video for all my points:



I think this gay guy I hung out with at one point talked about this couple we knew who had been together for ages like the beginning of high school or maybe year 8 (so between age 11-13, secondary/high school in the UK starts at age 11,) and he was talking about them having sex and how when you start having sex it's addictive but he didn't mention whether he'd had sex before. He also mentioned that eating chocolate mimics the sensation of sex? Maybe. I forgot what he said about chocolate now actually but I think about both these things from time to time. But my limited experiences of doing anything sexual later on were pretty [BEEP] so that was a huge disappointment honestly.

It's the complete opposite of Skins in a bad way.

So yeah this woman she didn't deviate from that in any sense even in personal fantasy. She didn't have a gay guy in her social group and she didn't stumble on or seek out porn online and formulate desires. Maybe she didn't look at media and start seeking out subtext or subverting the work itself to sexualise it to transform it into her own 'gaze.' (I guess we're calling it.) All these things... Her desires are soft or non existent. She was successfully castrated by society (kind of makes all the outrage about afab teenagers going on testosterone seem more ironic, but only reproduction matters.) She's absolutely disgusted by men and a hardcore feminist (whatever that means at this point.) She's going to either avoid you, or use this as a way of destroying you in a boring sexless way. As she's never experienced any aggressive urges it will probably become neurochemically addictive too. But that doesn't matter it becomes addictive to everyone. Rage is very addictive.



Of course this backlash is probably preferable to the alternative (You don't want Joanna Dennehy's roaming the street I imagine lol.) Especially if they eventually come to the conclusion you want. Patriarchal conservatism. But I won't.

Because as I keep saying:



'I am still not getting what I want.'

Also more important than that it's a lie.

"Oh well there's all this horrific jungle psychology but we're going to brush this under the rug and keep reproducing and focus on family and try to suppress sexuality and ignore that most women don't even seem to want men sexually and men don't like women."



It's still there.

And you've (twitter guy,) not posted images of yourself on twitter. But if you ever do. Minutes probably. That's how long before you become porn.



Eventually no one will care. No one will reproduce. And society will collapse globally.

And that's what Solanas was saying.

That's actually how her manifesto kind of ended. She wasn't really offering solutions or some kind of real ideology or philosophy it was mostly just nihilistic 'blackpill' doomerism. She didn't really think people were compatible. Like heterofatalism several decades before that word existed. She might have been the first incel. The only interesting part is that like Rachilde she kind of admitted what she wanted. I think a lot of people do have competing and incompatible desires.

The best response to the tweet wasn't mine though, it was actually this:

Careful you're going to get a song written about you

Sarah McLachlan already did that once:

The song was inspired by McLachlan's reaction to two deranged fans, both of whom had concocted a fantasy in which they were already in a relationship with her.[2] Of the two, the more famous is Uwe Vandrei, an Ottawa, Ontario native who sued McLachlan in 1994, alleging that his love letters to her had been the basis of "Possession". Vandrei had written and sent McLachlan love poems, although there is no direct connection between those poems and the lyrics of "Possession." Vandrei's lawsuit never came to trial as he died by suicide in the autumn of 1994.[3]

In an interview with Rolling Stone three years later, McLachlan said, "And this one person wasn't the only guy ... there were a lot of letters from other people saying the same kind of thing ... Writing the song 'Possession' was very therapeutic."[4] She also stated that, since the release of "Possession," she had stopped getting stalker-type fan letters, for which she was grateful.[4]

A lot of them are of course, pathetic. Not even in an insulting sense in the sense that they have nothing. Someone said:

"I can't wait for the women in your life to do [x bad thing to you]" and he responded saying:

"There are no women in my life."

Because some men want attention too.

Oh no he's MGTOW though he went his own way... To twitter to get attention from liberals (women.)

50,000 followers who are mostly other men who find him amusing. And he retweets stuff like one woman who said 'I will touch you' pointing out how they're so bad at threats that he thought they were coming onto him. But that's what he wants obviously. He has to pretend he's in control though and 'dominant' he's owning the libs wink wink.

do u have a collection of these you could share

And as Zheani said:

'some boys think their predators when they're really vultures'



Several months ago I created a mashup song of Taylor Swift and this Steven Wilson song Raider II. I didn't put much effort in so I kept it unlisted (also the volume is too low and I didn't realise.) And my reason for doing that was just some joke comment on a cover he made of one of her songs where someone said to reciprocate she'd cover Raider II but....



And the saddest fear
Comes creepin' in
That you never loved me
Or her
Or anyone
Or anything
Yeah

Raider II is actually a song that is written about a serial killer according to a post I read recently (and I already assumed it was something like that. He's had many true crime related music and dark themed music especially in the 2000s and early 2010s just didn't realise it was inspired by one in particular. These days I get the sense he's burnt out a bit on the nihilism etc) So it really fits in with this.

Also this Vince McMahon thing that's circulating on twitter right now is the most 'cucked (tm)' thing I have ever read. I don't know if this dm is true or someone shitposting, I don't know the source. So this is alleged. He is in the news for related controversies regardless though:

After the threesomes began, McMahon became more sadistic and his fantasies focused on control, such as [various things mentioned here] in which Ms.Grant was to be [redacted]

[dm screenshot]

OK and then you read this dm and it's all about a bunch of black guys. And then I look up this guy (because it's the first I've heard of this,) and he's a white guy of course.

I stopped reading after 'three black guys' and was like 'well we know who's into this fetish.'

His involvement in the fantasy is minimal and irrelevant. He has no control. He's not even having sex with her unlike the black guys. I guess you could argue the black guys are tools and (some) femdoms do something similar where they use men on other men but then it's emphasised more that they're in control for one, and even then it aint it you know imo. If you don't have a dick certain things are difficult. Sometimes you have weird thoughts about ice lollies and their potential uses:



(The ice lolly thing predated me listening to this song. Person in this video is a trans guy in a relationship with a woman and they don't have sex.)

Someone: So what type of music you listen to?

Me: It's complicated

Strap on stuff can kind of be a compromise. You have a dick though (I assume,) so what are you doing?

You're a masochist? OK that's fine then.

I mean...at least hes not racist I guess

Well the minimal research on politics and sexual interests suggests far right guys often like 'that kind of thing.' So that's not guaranteed by any means.

Hello darkness my old friend:



^ lol the opening weird dm. 'I'm sure I'm not the only person to get weird and kind of creepy dms'

The weirdest thing on an actual social media platform was in my YouTube comment section and this was actually posted by a woman. Most of my YT audience is women. She had a profile pic of herself and everything (and I don't show myself in my videos so this was not a physical appearance thing even also had nothing to do with the video,):

I can not Tell Why, but I feel like u are pregnant. I don't want to be the creepy one in the comment section, but, idk.

It's funny though if she knew how incredibly unlikely that would be.

I have gotten more sexualised stuff on a forum before as well with one guy. It must happen a bunch of times if you're a really popular YouTuber.

Anyway this is what happens when you're not cute.

The state of being self aware has clearly been a mistake for our species.

Lately I have noticed that everyone on twitter is weird as [BEEP] and miserable, everyone on instagram is just mad and miserable, and everyone on facebook just kinda chilling

Tumblr's weird as [BEEP] but (mostly) chill.

[Nyctophilia]

The discourse the whole Taylor thing has created is actually insane. I've been concerned about the increasing puritanism for some time now. While I've internalised a lot of it of course like most people (especially afab people,) I ultimately don't believe it is a good thing. This sort of thing:

Using someones likeness to produce pornographic images should really be banned

I don't see how you can ban this without neutering the technology and raping free speech. If I drew very realistic porn pictures of her would that be illegal?

Porn shouldn't be covered by free speech at all, so yes your drawing should also be illegal. Degenerate.

Same guy as above responding to someone asking 'what if I don't share it?':

I'm just thinking out loud here but would there be a difference if you draw it and keep it under your bed versus publishing said drawing?

In my perfect America, no.

It's not even just women arguing points like this the guy calling people degenerates was a man.

Tbh though what is he planning on doing in his perfect America? Breaking into people's houses? Reminds me of that weird crusader account who was like 'yes I will be in your bedroom.' Or whatever he said. That's weirder than anything I'm into mate.

I know it's hard for conservatives though, they don't have an imagination. The thing that makes them hate all porn also makes them hate creative expression.

Is masturbating while thinking about a women (who didn't consent to be in my masturbatory fantasy) also rape?

not necessarily but its pretty fucken gross and we should keep you on a list

^ imagine getting like Elon's brain [BEEP] in your brain (super scientific words,) and then they can make this a reality lol. Something like Minority Report is bound to happen.

So should we have an Internet regulated like China's to attempt to stop the deep fakers?

Why can't Taylor Swift just hire a couple people to track down the faker and deal with it at a lower level?

Why is the default answer often "give the government more power over our lives"?

Yes, free for all vigilante justice is so much more desirable than the rule of law /sarcasm

Maybe. You were never bullied at school were you? Authority figures never help. If you manage to successfully stand up to them then that can work but you have to avoid escalation so it's tricky. Kids are dissuaded from doing that in the first place though.

This allegedly worked:

The song was inspired by McLachlan's reaction to two deranged fans, both of whom had concocted a fantasy in which they were already in a relationship with her.[2] Of the two, the more famous is Uwe Vandrei, an Ottawa, Ontario native who sued McLachlan in 1994, alleging that his love letters to her had been the basis of "Possession". Vandrei had written and sent McLachlan love poems, although there is no direct connection between those poems and the lyrics of "Possession." Vandrei's lawsuit never came to trial as he died by suicide in the autumn of 1994.[3]

In an interview with Rolling Stone three years later, McLachlan said, "And this one person wasn't the only guy ... there were a lot of letters from other people saying the same kind of thing ... Writing the song 'Possession' was very therapeutic."[4] She also stated that, since the release of "Possession," she had stopped getting stalker-type fan letters, for which she was grateful.[4]

Not everyone is capable of that kind of thing but Taylor is ultimately in a position of power. She could write a song about stealing these guy's girlfriends etc.

OK I'm just really set on her acknowledging that for the lols but there are other potential solutions of course.

Of course people are crazier these days and I'm not an expert psychologist, I probably have undiagnosed autism in fact. It also won't help with the women who decide to do this both because they find her hot and because they envy her and want to shame her. You know like slut shaming but with AI. I mean it might help with the women who find her hot if she acknowledges them specifically. It won't help with people in general who want to destroy her anyway.

Prince had a story related to this too where this woman was following him outside his house:

In a 2008 interview with the New Yorker, the "Purple Rain" singer said that a woman he did not know would sometimes sit on swings in his private estate, known as Paisley Park.

"So I went out there one day and I was, like, 'Hey, all my friends in there say you?re a stalker. And that I should call the police. But I don?t want to do that, so why don?t you tell me what you want to happen. Why are you here? How do you want this to end?' And she didn't really have an answer for that. In the end, all she wanted was to be seen, for me to look at her. And she left and didn?t come back,? Prince told the magazine.

I guess this might work well for schizoid people because it breaks their fantasy and they're avoidant? I dunno. I know the one time I had a really intense crush on a guy online (not famous lol,) eventually I asked if I could add him on skype, after we started talking it became more manageable and then I just lost interest over time. It wasn't instantaneous though I suppose and they also once suggested we meet up and that he liked talking to me (but we never did because I wasn't happy with certain things about my life etc,) so this isn't really a great example but I still think there's something to kind of presenting people with reality.

Yeah I think it might work with avoidants if they're not too delusional but if someone has BPD traits or a similar personality type not so much. They handle rejection really badly. There isn't really a one size fits all solution and the best thing is prevention by avoiding fame.

The envy thing is a particular issue now because social media encourages this, the US and UK in particular have insane levels of inequality among the top and bottom of society, and people are encouraged to constantly signal how high status and rich they are which is.. Stupid.





I definitely wouldn't want to deal with that level of fame either.

Not a free for all, just a narrow targeting of whoever is responsible.

Do you not think this is how we get an internet like China's internet? I get you're a content creator, and this issue probably hits closer to home, but do you really not see any danger with this?

I myself am trying not to end up living in this world:

Pseudonymous author was charged under law that makes it an 'especially serious' crime to sell more than 5,000 copies of a work classed as pornographic

Free-speech campaigners have slammed China's "flagrant disregard for fundamental human rights" after the author of a gay erotic novel was sentenced to more than a decade in prison for producing and selling pornographic materials.

The author, who writes under the pseudonym Tianyi and is from eastern China's Anhui province, was identified by the state-run Global Times only by her surname, Liu. The paper reported that police were alerted after the book Gongzhan, translated as Occupy, went viral last year. Police in the Anhui city of Wuhu, where Liu was sentenced, said the novel described obscene sexual behaviour between males, and was "full of perverted sexual acts such as violation and abuse".

Liu's jail sentence is 10-and-a-half years, and stems from a judicial interpretation dating back to 1998, according to the South China Morning Post. This states that if an author sells more than 5,000 copies of pornographic books, or makes more than 10,000 yuan ((pounds)1,123) from them, it is an "especially serious circumstance" that carries a sentence of imprisonment for not less a decade or life.

Liu is reported to have sold 7,000 copies of Occupy, which deals with a "forbidden love affair between a teacher and a student", and to have made illegal profits of 150,000 yuan. She has filed an appeal to the judgment, said the Global Times.

I did a bit research on the Writer. She writes gay themed romantic novels contain sexual content. (I personally think there?s a difference between an erotic novel and a romantic novel with sex scenes) I read some of the posts on her WEIBO (Chinese version of twitter) in the weekend when the news came out. She used it to record her life.

Looks like she came from a very conservative and narrow minded family who were treating her poorly since she was born only because she was a girl. Her parents gave all their emotional and financial supports to her younger brother and they forced her to drop out high school. She attempted suicide a few times and even thought of becoming a child prostitute just to escape the family.

Lucky enough she found a labour work at a factory after escaping home. She then spent all her free time to read and write. She posted her novels on the internet first and became quite famous. That?s why a Taiwanese publisher asked her to sell her works. Erotic content is legal in Taiwan. She needed the money and sold one of the book. The book got really popular and got reprinted too. However, the publisher lied to her and never gave her any royalties except the initial 400USD for purchasing her work. The publisher claimed that they brought the copyright permanently and don?t need to give her more money for it. She ended up paying them 4000USD to printed the work herself and tried to sell them before she got caught. That?s why many people in China suspect the publisher reported her to Chinese government.

According to a few Chinese lawyers, her case is not supposed to be ended this bad. Many of her writer friends and fans wanted to donate and help her to find a good lawyer. They visited her hometown and her family refused to help her. One of her relative claimed that her mum, step-dad, and brother were actually willing to see her in jail because they feel shamed. Even when she escaped to another city she still sent most of her wages back to her family every month to help them out.

I don?t know about the lesbian part too. I didn?t read through everything about her but her weibo didn?t indicate that she?s a lesbian. I only gathered that after sacrificing herself to the family the whole time, she just realised that she never cared for herself for once. In her last few weibo, she was excited about trying eyeliner for the first time in her life. She said she is almost 30 and never even touched make ups and skin cares. she?s really jealous of girls who can afford to be pretty and she wanted to start loving herself. Maybe she can finally have a life and deserve to be pretty too. Thinking of she will come out when she?s 40. It is quite depressing.

There are many more bullshit happened in her life. People could google translate her weibo if interested. Seems it is difficult to be a girl in China.

TL;DR: writer came from a sexist family and everything in her life was f*cked up. She got caught right after everything went well for once in her life.

EDIT: deleted a half finished sentence

I didn't hear about the lesbian part either (one headline I just found mentions her being a lesbian I don't know if that's true.)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xiao_Z...ycott_incident

The Xiao Zhan boycott incident, also known as the 227 incident, is a 2020 online controversy that originated between the fans of Chinese actor Xiao Zhan and Archive of Our Own users in Mainland China.[1][2] The incident started when the internet censorship system known as the Great Firewall of China blocked the fan fiction publishing platform Archive of Our Own in the country, due to concerns about the actor's fanbase regarding vulgar and explicit content on the website.[3]

On January 30, 2020, a user named "迪迪出逃记" from the fan fiction site Archive of Our Own began serializing a novel titled Falling (下坠), which focuses on Xiao Zhan and his fellow Chinese actor Wang Yibo.[4] The two idol-actors initially starred as the leads in the popular TV series The Untamed (2019), which is based on the Boys' Love novel Mo Dao Zu Shi.

On February 24, links of the chapters 12 and 13 of the novel Falling (下坠) were posted by the author on the Chinese social networking site Weibo.[5] On February 26, 2020, some of Xiao Zhan's fans claimed that the work contains explicit pornographic content and the feminization of Xiao Zhan, as sketched by users "一只汐哥哥" and "一个执白".[6] Many fans took it as an insult to the actor, denouncing it on Weibo. Author "迪迪出逃记" and the graphic artists were the main targets of criticism. Users "来碗甜粥吗" and "巴南区小兔赞比", the "opinion leaders" among Xiao Zhan's fanbase, are recognized as the leaders of the reporting incident against the author and the graphic artists. In a Weibo post on February 26, user "巴南区小兔赞比" said that "actors and their fans" do not need to "accept vulgar underage prostitution literature based on artists" and "such behavior not only infringes on the artist's reputation, but also pollutes the online environment and brings down a large number of underaged fans who lack judgement".[7] On February 29, 2020, Archive of Our Own was officially blocked in mainland China.[8]

The banning of Archive of Our Own in mainland China caused controversy among its users. Their criticisms were further amplified by controversial behaviors of some of Xiao Zhan's fans, and claimed that the actor should take responsibility for his fans' actions.[9] A section of the site's users called for a protest on Xiao Zhan's brand deals and endorsed products, flooding the brand's pages with negative comments. They formed a Weibo supertopic group titled "227 (February 27) Memorial Day", referring to the incidents that occurred regarding the reporting of Xiao Zhan's fans in February 27. This led to increasing cyber violence towards Xiao Zhan, his fans, and even bystanders.[10] This includes Chinese variety show host He Jiong, who was attacked by the group following a rumor that Xiao Zhan would be making an appearance on his show. Some accounts that led online attacks and harassment against the actor were labelled as paid, "professional" anti-fans.[11]

That's insane.

Xiao Zhan scandal ? why millions of Chinese shoppers boycotted Piaget and Estee Lauder because of homoerotic idol fan fiction

On February 24, a Weibo user published two article links to a piece of fan fiction titled Falling, which depicts the male idol Xiao Zhan as a cross-dressing teen falling in love with another well-known idol named Wang Yibo. Xiao's fans were unhappy about having their favourite idol's identity used in homoerotic literature and viewed it as "tarnishing Xiao?s image". Many fans then decided to report the fictional content to Chinese authorities as "underage pornography", hoping it would get it censored.

They blocked an entire website because some people were offended by homosexual relationships between two characters and their actors in fanfiction and fanart + feminisation themes.

Don't get me wrong on the one hand this does make me feel very powerful. It should make them feel powerful too. On the other it's not a power that's useful in the end. Especially when you're getting locked in prison sometimes.





Unironically though. These people scare me.

Deepfakes are scary because people are terrifying. Might show up to your house if people believe you said something you don't believe, or something you do believe that they dislike. Fame is terrifying in general for that reason.

Because people are terrifying.

One solution is to have countries be divided by personality traits instead of just deciding things based on geography and where people were born/move based on economic factors and war. But to do that we will actually need a new planet now because no one's going to let go of this system. Damn.

There is a reason people have these personality traits though and unfortunately it probably is loosely eusocial:

Eusociality is distinguished from all other social systems because individuals of at least one caste usually lose the ability to perform at least one behavior characteristic of individuals in another caste. Eusocial colonies can be viewed as superorganisms.

But perhaps people can still work together while remaining culturally separated. I don't know.

Oh I stumbled on Kaczynski tweet. He's always relevant.

RIP Ted Kaczynski we'd be living in a stone age paradise right now if your scumbag brother hadn't betrayed you.

I think not.

man had literally everything going for him, and had the intellect to actually be able to make a change and find a way to help the world but his idea was to make explosive packages instead

That's what intense sexual repression and mental health issues will do to you. (And so no he didn't have everything going for him. He was just really intelligent.)

For a period of several weeks in 1966, Kaczynski experienced intense sexual fantasies of being female and decided to undergo gender transition. He arranged to meet with a psychiatrist but changed his mind in the waiting room and discussed other things instead, without disclosing his original reason for making the appointment. Afterwards, enraged, he considered killing the psychiatrist and other people whom he hated. Kaczynski described this episode as a "major turning point" in his life.[32][33] He recalled: "I felt disgusted about what my uncontrolled sexual cravings had almost led me to do. And I felt humiliated, and I violently hated the psychiatrist. Just then there came a major turning point in my life. Like a Phoenix, I burst from the ashes of my despair to a glorious new hope."[34]

I just think it's a shame no one told him it was OK to have these thoughts and he didn't have to medically transition if he didn't want to and it's not shameful. Not that it would have helped.

This part was cause of MK Ultra:

In another letter, Kaczynski told his younger brother he had "a good deal of anger in me and there are lots of people I'd like to hurt." But, the undated letter continued, "the reason I've never committed any crime is that I have been successfully brainwashed by society."

Kaczynski's lawyers later attributed his hostility towards mind control techniques to his participation in Murray's study.[20] During the Second World War, Murray had worked with the Office of Strategic Services, a U.S. intelligence agency often referred to as the predecessor to the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), where he conducted psychological experiments.[24] Some sources have suggested that Murray's experiments were part of Project MKUltra, the CIA's program of research into mind control.[25][26] Chase and others have also suggested that this experience may have motivated Kaczynski's criminal activities.[27][28] Kaczynski stated he resented Murray and his co-workers, primarily because of the invasion of his privacy he perceived as a result of their experiments. Nevertheless, he said he was "quite confident that [his] experiences with Professor Murray had no significant effect on the course of [his] life."[29]

I think I read some stuff that suggested his anger issues predated that too like he had a lot of personality issues. I think this was a really bad thing to do to someone with this personality type. That relates to a post I didn't post about HPV vaccines seeming to eliminate cervical cancer (mostly cause antivaxxer's and similar groups have a similar personality type I think probably moderately-very disagreeable and very neurotic.)

I did not like it. Read like a 59 year old conservative divorced man complaining about the kids these days. Very disappointing considering his framing as a radical.

People are really reactionary now. Hard to find actual radicals. According to this definition:

In political science, a reactionary or a reactionist is a person who holds political views that favor a return to the status quo ante--the previous political state of society--which the person believes was better in some ways that are absent from contemporary society. As a descriptor term, reactionary derives from the ideological context of the left?right political spectrum. As an adjective, the word reactionary describes points of view and policies meant to restore a status quo ante.[1]

I think it gets confusing because behaviour can be radical but ideology can be reactionary. As in his case.

Hmm...

In the third place, the objective of securing the rights of women, homosexuals, animals, and so forth, is incompatible with the objective of eliminating civilization, because women and homosexuals in primitive societies often do not have equality, and such societies are usually cruel to animals. If one's goal is to secure the rights of these groups, then one[']s best policy is to stick with modern civilization.

Ted you really suck(ed.) I haven't read your manifesto in full (feel like I skimmed some of it at some point?) But I know you didn't devote any of it to talking about your feminisation kink. That's even worse than this paragraph (which apparently is from some letter he wrote to some Turkish anarchist.) Boo.

Also the bombing thing was entirely pointless.

At first it seemed eerie and strange to go all alone into the forest, away from all roads and paths. But as I came to know the forest and many of the plants and animals that lived in it, the feeling of strangeness disappeared and I grew more and more comfortable in the woodland. I also became more and more certain that I did not want to spend my whole life in civilization, and that I wanted to go and live in some wild place.

Because I found modern life absolutely unacceptable, I grew increasingly hopeless until, at the age of 24, I arrived at a kind of crisis: I felt so miserable that I didn't care whether I lived or died. But when I reached that point, a sudden change took place: I realized that if I didn't care whether I lived or died, then I didn't need to fear the consequences of anything I might do. Therefore I could do anything I wanted. I was free! That was the great turning-point in my life because it was then that I acquired courage, which has remained with me ever since. It was at that time, too, that I became certain that I would soon go to live in the wild, no matter what the consequences. I spent two years teaching at the University of California in order to save some money, then I resigned my position and went to look for a place to live in the forest.

Kara: How/when did you decide to bomb?

The fifth of August I began a hike to the east. I got to my hidden camp that I have in a gulch beyond what I call "Diagonal Gulch." I stayed there through the following day, August 6. I felt the peace of the forest there. But there are few huckleberries there, and though there are deer, there is very little small game. Furthermore, it had been a long time since I had seen the beautiful and isolated plateau where the various branches of Trout Creek originate. So I decided to take off for that area on the 7th of August. A little after crossing the roads in the neighborhood of Crater Mountain I began to hear chain saws; the sound seemed to be coming from the upper reaches of Roaster Bill Creek. I assumed they were cutting trees; I didn't like it but I thought I would be able to avoid such things when I got onto the plateau. Walking across the hillsides on my way there, I saw down below me a new road that had not been there previously, and that appeared to cross one of the ridges that close in Stemple Creek. This made me feel a little sick. Nevertheless, I went on to the plateau. What I found there broke my heart. The plateau was criss-crossed with new roads, broad and well-made for roads of that kind. The plateau is ruined forever. The only thing that could save it now would be the collapse of the technological society. I couldn't bear it. That was the best and most beautiful and isolated place around here and I have wonderful memories of it.

One road passed within a couple of hundred feet of a lovely spot where I camped for a long time a few years ago and passed many happy hours. Full of grief and rage I went back and camped by South Fork Humbug Creek.

The next day I started for my home cabin. My route took me past a beautiful spot, a favorite place of mine where there was a spring of pure water that could safely be drunk without boiling. I stopped and said a kind of prayer to the spirit of the spring. It was a prayer in which I swore that I would take revenge for what was being done to the forest.

I could have told him about my weird gay plant people fantasies too. With the androgynous plant elves and the Humans and encouraging the Humans to betray civilisation etc. He reminds me of some of my characters.

Also the forest bunny guy porn thing I discovered recently (that guy also created another thing about a nymph character that he later recorded himself acting out even though he wrote it for a female character initially. It reminded me of my writing in the past a bit. Especially the part where he could generate his own food.)

"I could save him." No I'm not that delusional. Just 'play' with him.

[Doseone]

Lol, spotify made a nihilist playlist for me. What even is nihilistic music? It would have to be based on the lyrical content. I don't think the spotify algorithms take that into account.

edit:

I think about the concept of God a lot, if you haven't noticed. lol. So, I was thinking about how in Christianity people are all guilty of sin, and the wages of sin is death/hell. If that's the case how is it sinful to commit any finite act against another? Hell is eternal and is deserved according to Christianity. Any "sin" committed against another is infinitely less of a punishment than torturing somebody forever, but the latter is deserved. Most people (all actually) would choose to be sinned against than to be tortured for eternity. The concept of sin and the existence of hell seems to lead to a contradiction.

[Nyctophilia]

The 'dissident right' are ex-libertarians (the city kind,) bored liberals and Red Scare podcast listeners playing 4d Chess.

So anything Thiel funds - the whole 'Dimes Square' scene, Moldbug, BAP etc.

They are the political equivalent of a man posting on r/rolereversal complaining about pegging and insisting that 'it's OK to be masculine.'

Tucker Carlson is probably the only conservative who knows they exist. Even Curtis Yarvin ended up engaged for a while to some random progressive woman who used to write BDSM stuff after his wife died because they don't actually want to associate with red tribe people. They want to rule them they don't want to be friends with them.

*One week later*

The British Dissident Right will be sexy!

Unlike those cringe American Dissident Rightists who want to return to boring Christianity.

The "sexy" in question?

[photo I removed]

The middle one looks like a [slur for trans]

And all look dysgenic.

The two on the left are tr*nnies, correct, but these are some quite prominent members of the 'British Dissident Right' ([redacted] and their polycule companion). As you can see they're eschewing 'boring Christianity' in favour of being 'sexy'.

OK that's it. It's over.

I'm going to have to start making 'Never forget what they took from us' memes.

vaguely aware of them continuing to discuss this as I sit here contemplating why the universe hates me lol they're just like 'yes we all agree this is bad and they are not welcome. Also I am a heterosexual supremacist and OK with sexual libertines but only for heterosexuals.'

Oh...

[redacted] is a fifth columnist and needs to be completely exercised from our movement.

Make it clear to HIM that he has no place in our circles.

I'm glad you agree.

edit: I do have to say it's funny that they posted this ironically and I was like 'oh no she's cute tho..........'

It was one thing with Curtis Yarvin - he's American, not even that cute, and not even that feminine. It was just the rightoids accusing him of being submissive to his bdsm fiance + saying he sounds like a cheerleader.

But you can't steal all the cute long haired people with glasses in the UK.

But you know there was a Tory mayor running for London on a platform of self-ID and legalising marijuana so this country makes little sense at the best of times.

Also I can't find the one with glasses socials based on this info and this distresses me. Are they even being serious? Did they grab this photo off google? I don't know!

This is the worst thing I have ever seen. And I've seen several tweets about violence in the past several minutes alone. But this is probably - definitely - just because I haven't slept in well over 24 hours.

Actually the concept of fifth columnists is hot like it was when I was pretending Curtis Yarvin was doing that. I need to know if the one wearing glasses is into people like me and if she looks good when the beer glass isn't covering most of her face.

For scientific reasons.

There was also that other trans woman who looked attractive in only some photos. Was kind of gothy with glasses. She worked for like some weird podcast thing based in London and Brighton.

Thanks for reminding me about podcast woman. She has a fairly attractive recent photo I just found. That makes this slightly better but only a bit.

Well. Guess I'll just go back to staring at images of these two until I cave and ask them for more info:





Very normal.

Posts about Ted Kaczynski and shit.

I'm fine. Clearly.

I found a telegram page for two people with those names which I assume is them? But no photos. Also through that found one twitter page. Yeah they're like far right. I'm too lazy to read through most of this. There's a bunch of Pepe memes mixed in and other stuff. Also seem to have some YT channel where no one shows their face. I do mean far right too I mean they're on telegram and complaining about how strict Twitter is and like it's fucking twitter. The absolute state of twitter now. But all these pages seem to be run by multiple people so not sure who was complaining really.

Then after deciding I wasn't going to ask and managing to find some info myself, I decided to tell the circle jerk of conservatives that one of those people is cute. I'm pretty sure I won't feel the same tomorrow honestly. But I just needed to point out that that wasn't actually the problem.

Now I know how shoe felt at that Jan 5th rally lol where she was interviewing people (before everything happened.) And found that guy she found cute with the terrible opinion. But this isn't generally an issue for me for obvious reasons.

I'm going to need to seek revenge on 4chan maybe.

How is that even possible though you know? I'm so idiosyncratic.

I've got to get better taste in Humans quickly.

I saw this tweet earlier too lol because people keep talking about how in the US now politics are a dealbreaker for women so because men keep moving right wing and women care more they're struggling to find partners or something:

But, unless the man is obsessed with and constantly talks about his politics, why is politics a deal breaker today? It wasn't years ago- it wasn't unusual for spouses to hold different political beliefs. Why is it so important now, apparently particularly for women?

It was over anyway tbf even before the whole political thing because they're all poly and probably not into afab people. OK I should be slightly less dramatic but you know. Until I sleep:



I don't know the dynamics of their relationship either or if most of this is even true lol. Like this makes me realise that I would have no idea how to approach/navigate a relationship like that and wouldn't try anyway most likely. I was bad enough at dating monogamously lol. No under different circumstances I prob would try something in the most awkward way imaginable like usual cause it would just continue to eat at me. Then if I don't get rejected (which is very likely,) realise I'm not into the person or something stupid because my brain sucks.

Saw this tweet earlier too:

I haven't dated a girl in years. ended around covid times and I haven't bothered to date since. Seriously, what is the point in trying to court anyone in this society. Everyone seems to want the equivalent of anonymous gay sex or the sort conformity of a slave.

So I thought earlier: That's definitely the impression social media gives at least.

now: *at some imaginary support group*

"Yeah you know I've been single for a decade for a number of reasons. When I was 13 I became obsessed with this older girl with a Green Day hoody who wore glasses. I don't think it was a crush but I haven't really been obsessed with anyone like that where it wasn't a crush since. Back when I was last trying to date well my relationships didn't really work and there was also this one person I thought was cute with long hair and glasses and they made it clear at one point they weren't into me in a kind of insulting way and then a few years later I became attracted to this musician Steven Wilson who tbh I thought sort of looked like them, and my friend said looked like them when they saw a photo of Steven at one point - independently came to that conclusion, and then coincidentally many years later I heard from said friend that this other person came out as non-binary and apparently a bunch of people from our courses came out as trans or non-binary over the years and then Steven uploaded a picture of Porcupine Tree put through face app's gender swap filter which appeared in my twitter timeline and I didn't notice it was him I thought 'who's that cute girl-oh I see' and I guess at some point I ended up showing that to my friend who immediately said it looked like that non-binary person in photos they saw while wearing makeup which I was very curious about but controlled myself unlike now. And then I discovered Geddy Lee and Paul Dano with glasses, and probably other people I'm forgetting. IAMX wore glasses a few times too. The friend I'm talking about is someone I was seeing for several months and they also had glasses and longish ha-

And now I just don't know if I want to be in a far right polycule at this time in my life.

Yeah I might need to leave the UK, and then maybe the planet."

Also:




'If you don't get some therapy life repeats.'

But I never do. Well I did once didn't help (and the focus was all on social phobia.) But I never do again.