Random Thought of the Day

[Nyctophilia]

The short guy is still taller than me because I'm 5'1" lol. Fml.

No wait what am I talking about. I forgot how tall I am lol. I'm 5'2" I grew a whole inch during this post. And sometimes I was almost 5'3" He's still taller though because he's 5'4"

Hmm found his twitter. (Haven't finished watching the video. Seems like they broke something already. I dunno what but something glass.)

"men>women"

Men=women but less women let me suck them off on short notice

Lol OK.

I'm trying to figure out if he's exclusively gay his energy says no but that's not 100%. I think it's going to be impossible because he does onlyfans so he has to be 'gay' even if he isn't gay.

do you prefer girl freddie or manly shotgun countryside freddie ?

nope.

I think he's gay I don't find him that attractive anyway. Like he's kind of cute cause of the glasses and everything.

Really just trying to find alternatives to 1970s rockstars.

On the 25th isn't just going to be my first shoot with a dude it'll be my first real dick and the second time ive ever left the house dressed up. Wish me luck xx

hmmm i though the femboi thing for u was a thing for fun aswell just like finn but i guess its not for u? well all power to u freddie <3

Wow what happened to alll the years of you being straight and having a girlfriend

I was just about to stop scrolling (also I couldn't find any tweets about girlfriends so not sure what they're talking about.) But it's OK because I'm turned off anyway lol. I can't handle any competition (even in imagination,) that's why I only like 1970s rockstars who are now in their 70s and weren't sex symbols in their time and only sexually appreciated now vocally by 12 non-binary and women people on tumblr. And then I sometimes imagine they're my lesbian girlfriend or something weird.

I mean that's not why, but it tends to be convenient.

Now I feel bad about not having a dick again. Cause of some photos with a dildo.

This has been an interesting accidental social experiment.

And I have cramps because I think I'm getting my period. And I kind of have to go see my dad soon. Was thinking tomorrow. Was thinking today but put it off.

I blame F1nn.

You know all of this could have been avoided I'm realising now if I just kept watching the video because he said he 'employs the missus' who I guess his girlfriend to do his makeup.

I blame F1nn again.

I wonder if she's OK with him having sex with guys for porn or if those timelines didn't overlap. I wish I could be that cool but it would bug me if they're a bottom because I'm very sexually threatened by masculine dominant guys with dicks because I don't have a dick. Yeah that is a pretty weird combination like if I had a dick even not being masculine wouldn't bother me as much and on the other hand I don't really get sexually envious/jealous in the same way about feminine guys or trans women even if they're tops. I think it's like the idea of a certain kind of personality type/attitude along with a combination of traits and the way culture caters to them that pisses me off. Also because nothing bothers me consistently (well some things do but this kind of thing,) everything I've wrote is also false. Who knows? I mean it's also just that this is very abstract I guess. You can't really know unless you're in the situation.

All of this and I don't really find this guy that attractive. What are you doing brain?

They have a YouTube channel but they haven't uploaded there for a year. I think I'm only (somewhat) attracted to them with glasses. I have a problem. Several actually. 99 problems if you will.



It seems to run in families as I've come across a bunch of people who have homosexual and trans people in their family like multiple members. Arielle Scarcella is a lesbian with a gay twin brother, Blaire White (trans woman,) said she had a gay uncle once. Some guy I used to talk to on discord who was on hrt but didn't socially transistion had a gay brother (he wasn't gay was in a relationship with a trans woman but I think he was probably bisexual though he didn't label himself that someone once jokingly pointed out he was more into guys than I was because he'd sometimes get off to masculine men in porn which I don't,) someone else who was a trans woman I talked to on discord had a brother who was a crossdresser. Probably other examples I've forgotten. I saw some trans guy arguing with people on twitter recently and he said his sister is a trans woman.

Also children born to lesbian parents are more likely to report samesex attraction (male and female children.)

The 25-year-olds are participants in the ongoing U.S. National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study (NLLFS), which has followed the same cohort of offspring from conception to adulthood. It has a 92% retention rate since it began in 1986. The current analysis compared 76 offspring of lesbian parents and 76 demographically matched participants from the National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG). [...]

31% of female and 73% of male NLLFS offspring reported being only attracted to the opposite sex, compared to 54% and 91% of NSFG females and males.

54% of female and 33% of male NLLFS offspring reported having a same-sex sexual experience, compared to 38% and 9% of NSFG females and males.

70% of female and nearly 90% of male NLLFS offspring identified as heterosexual or straight, compared to 88% and 98% of NSFG females and males.

Among the NLLFS female offspring, the percentage identifying as sexual minorities decreased from 49% to 30% between the ages of 17 and 25. In contrast, the percentage of NLLFS females who had engaged in same-sex sexual behavior increased from 15% to 54% in the same period.

The percentage of NLLFS male offspring identifying as sexual minorities decreased from 22% to 10% between the ages of 17 and 25, and the percentage reporting same-sex sexual experiences increased from 6% to 33%.

It's significant but not insane.

Another study examined gay dads as well:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20642872/

Percentages of children of gay and lesbian parents who adopted non-heterosexual identities ranged between 16% and 57%, with odds ratios of 1.7 to 12.1, depending on the mix of child and parent genders. Daughters of lesbian mothers were most likely (33% to 57%; odds ratios from 4.5 to 12.1) to report non-heterosexual identities.

They don't really break it down in the abstract. Predictably seems most common with daughters with lesbian parents. You know they say lesbian parents but I bet they're lumping bisexual women in too. They should start using sapphic or something unless they mean lesbians. Bisexual men are less common in general but should differentiate with that too. Some people coined the term Achillean because everything has to be Greek I guess.

Personally though I'm the only LGBT+ person in my extended family as far as I know. When me and my brother were young kids according to my nan people would mistake us for twin girls and then he'd get mistaken for a girl often until puberty just because he didn't like getting his hair cut (and this wasn't a gender thing he just disliked the hair dressers and prob disliked change. He also was very picky in general and disliked people buying him clothes etc.) I dunno why though because he was other wise very boyish and his hair was generally kinda messy too like he never seemed female to me. He had mildly non-conforming behaviour rarely like when he looked after a baby doll at one point for a while but otherwise very stereotypically boyish and is pretty masculine now. He's very cisgender too. He said once he specifically enjoys being a guy. I think there's some related stuff in my family though because a lot of weird stuff tends to cluster. Like the correlation with autism and neurodivergence in general. Also left handedness my mum is left handed for example.

Anyway conservatives pick up on this kind of thing and freak out.

[Nyctophilia]

Some guy tried to argue with me about the 'gay' bigender amab person getting upset about being asked not to wear a dress to a wedding by bringing up butch lesbians being encouraged by their wives to wear a dress to their own wedding which has to be the worst example ever lol. I'd love to watch that conversation happen. On what planet is that a common scenario? The women who date butch women are specifically into their presentation for starters. And they're definitely not wearing a dress to their own wedding if they're butch. It's their own wedding lol why would they do that?

I mean if you Google search butch lesbian wedding it's all suits. Either two people in suits or if a butch/femme couple than the butch woman is in a suit. Some of the women aren't even butch and in a suit.

If you think this is likely you've been watching too much L Word like when Shane wears a dress once and is still unhappy (I haven't watched it so I'm just familiar with this clip I've stumbled on before lol,) and she's not butch her character is androgynous. But fat chance you're getting an actual butch woman to wear a dress and she definitely won't be happy about it if she does.



I think there are a lot of guys who would find it to be less of a big deal actually. Mostly because they haven't had the same pressure or trauma surrounding this.

Kate Moennig has also worn dresses on (counting on google images lol,) at least 5 occasions outside of playing characters. But also obviously:

Shane was originally billed to Moennig as "sexy" and "androgynous".[1] Moennig told Michelle Kort from The Advocate that she had learned "a lot" from playing Shane. She has elements of realism because "life imitates art and art imitates life". The actress further explained that she related to certain aspects of Shane's storylines because she had previously experienced them.[1] Moennig did not agree with labeling the character butch. Fellow cast member Leisha Hailey (who plays Alice Pieszecki) also disagreed and believed that Shane was more androgynous.[2]

https://www.advocate.com/commentary/...et-butch-women

Op-ed: Why Hollywood Can't Get With Butch Women

As long as the entertainment industry cravenly appeals to straight men, less-than-feminine women will rarely see their stories on screen.

When I was in high school -- way back in the late '90s, before I was out -- a straight friend warned me not to watch the movie Wild Things because it featured two women kissing (that's the tip of the iceberg). The first thing I did was watch it. I don't remember much, but the scene(s) where beautiful Denise Richards and sultry goth Neve Campbell tongue-wrestle stuck with me. In those days, seeing actresses make out was like watching the moon landing.

That reminds me I really loved The Canterville ghost as a kid (yeah the 'gothic' thing really did start young.) I mean the version with Neve Campbell and Patrick Stewart. I haven't seen it since I was a kid now (I kind of don't want to rewatch it at this point because it might ruin my memories lol,) but when I was a kid that was basically my favourite movie at one point. The Craft was great too but I watched that much much later as a young adult.



I definitely talked about this and this song and everything before but I love this song and this cover version a lot.

When Showtime released The L Word in 2004, it was a major hit, despite no shortage of bad writing. A large part of the show's success had to do with the fact that it appealed largely to straight viewers. Men for the first time could watch women have sex in a perfectly acceptable way, with their wives or girlfriends beside them. What television viewers have been witnessing the last two decades is a sexual revolution, not a [BEEP] one. It's no secret the entertainment

industry borrows from minority experiences and repackages them at its leisure. It embraces lesbian sexuality and discards the rest. With the exception of Shane (Kate Moennig), who was really an androgynous character, and Max (Daniela Sea), there weren't many butch characters on The L Word (and this only lasted until Max transitioned to a man). The show's producers were obviously struggling to make a show about [BEEP] women that was still appealing to straight viewers. [..]

Netflix's Orange Is the New Black, a show about women in prison, features one butch character -- Big Boo, played by Lea DeLaria. Crass, obnoxious, and sex-obsessed, DeLaria's character is the personification of the butch lesbian stereotype. But she is also authentically human in many ways. I go back and forth between liking her and hating her, which is understandable. When I finally meet a character who is sort of like me, she's in a jail cell. That's not surprising. Prison is exactly the place many would expect to find someone like Boo. After all, women perceived as too masculine are often seen as bad and deserving of punishment.

The show features a few other masculine-leaning characters, like Stella Carlin (Ruby Rose), who, like Shane, is more androgynous than butch. As a [BEEP] character there's nothing wrong with her. Many lesbians are androgynous, and many see it as beautiful. In some ways, Orange Is the New Black can be applauded for embracing characters who exist outside gender norms. But still, when it comes to the absence of butch characters, there are unfilled gaps.

This has become a big point of argument actually lol but I feel like it's important. Because if you don't diffentiate people are like 'oh so I saw this butch woman doing x so why can't you?' To butch women.

Despite Shane initially being labelled as androgynous rather than butch, a sex scene between Shane and Paige in season four showed a fantasy in which they were depicted as a 1950s butch and femme couple, respectively, and in The L Word: Generation Q, she is referred to as "Uncle Shane" by Angelica Porter-Kennard.

I'm quite surprised there's not one post on here about Kate Moennig/Shane ^^
To me she's the definition of a hot butch. Some ppl might call her androgynous bc she's skinny and occasionally dressed in a more feminine way during public events in the past, but to me she's 100% butch. I judge mostly by the energy someone gives off, also the sound of their voice, the way they move, their mannerisms and then the look.

Some women have a butch energy but are presenting more on feminine side. Good example is Gia Carangi.

Gia's energy was kind of borderline and sometimes she's more feminine but she was also often on drugs. She caught my attention too though in a YT thumbnail before the one they posted as well haha (or at least the same interview.) Apparently she admired David Bowie a bunch.

Also in some photos she kind of reminds me of Zendaya.

Rue and Gia Carangi

I was thinking that Rue reminds me a bit about Gia Carangi. Maybe it's something about Zendaya's interpretation of her character. Just this badass hot look. Not only for the drug addiction, but more fore this angst for life and at the same time this big big sensibility, big empathy. I don't know, I see the same pattern in some way. Just like Rue character is inspired a bit by Gia. What do you think?

yoooo. No I get it.

Oh man I cannot stay on one topic.

Agree💯 I'm the one who posted about Shane. Gia is indeed one of the very few feminine presenting women, I'd feel sexually attracted to as well I think. Also Freja Beha Erichsen.

I don't consider Freja to be butch. Not femme either but def not butch imo.

This entire conversation is happening in a thread about butch women lol. She has pretty good taste though lol. Although she didn't link this photo:

Explain the Shane obsession

Ok seriously. I have even straight friends who I?ve watched the L word with and even they are like "oh I'd totally get with her." Kate is very interesting and unique looking, but what do y'all think is the sex appeal of Shane? She's an emotionally unavailable asshole most of the time 😂

Well I can tell you why straight women like her it's because she has rock star energy/aesthetic.

I don't get the obsession? Fake butch with shaggy dog haircut and a skinny beanpole with no boobs?

So you get it. I'm actually not into the character Shane though really well I never bothered to watch the show. I just find Kate attractive sometimes because she's androgynous with long hair, has a nice voice, introverted (it didn't work before and I don't learn.)

Also he said he doesn't get why it's controversial but of course it is. You can find posts about this online too by butch women talking about other people's weddings and other situations where they've been told they should wear a dress:

My brother is getting married and his fiance just texted me to inform me that I'm supposed to wear a dress to the wedding, no exceptions. It's just a dress for one day, and I'm not really interested in fighting her on it. But I don't really know how to style a dress without going full femme. I have not bought the dress yet, but I'm plus-sized and it needs to be forest green, so my options as far as the dress itself goes are somewhat limited. Suggestions?

I would seriously consider talking to your brother about this; forget about family, I've been in the wedding party for friends and they welcomed me and all the other wedding party members to wear either a dress or a suit & tie that matched their wedding colors (specific options were provided). I think her informing you that you're supposed to wear a dress to the wedding is beyond the pale and no way to treat someone whose family you're becoming part of.

As much as I agree, she also said no to her own sister's similar request to wear something other than a dress. I don't think there will be any changing her mind on this.

This woman didn't attend in the same situation:

I was in this same exact situation (except also pressured by my own family) and i just didn't attend.

This one said she also wouldn't go:

I honestly wouldn?t go if I was told to wear a dress. However if you do go you could assert dominance and wear cargo pants underneath or just generally go the r/maliciouscompliance route but I'm a petty [BEEP] so take my suggestion with a grain of salt 🧂.

There are a couple of posts referencing that subreddit lol.

This person also said they ultimately wouldn't go but would try to discuss it and find out why they wanted them to wear a dress:

Being GNC/butch/masc is an identity for many people. Personally, I would ask to wear something else (I'd prefer to wear a suit) and if I was told no, I probably would ask to discuss their reasoning and try to have a grown up conversation about it. If they still insisted I wear a dress, I wouldn't go.

Wearing a dress is drag for me. I do not compromise when it comes to my dignity and identity.

All the comments are like this. The bolded made me lol:

I know little of het marriage asks like this, I'm curious why she has this rule ?

Wearing a blazer atop it, combat boots, unique but tame socks, a thick leather bracelet

Because some het women subconsciously realize that this one day of being a princess is the only social glorification they'll get as women for the rest of their lives, so everything has to be perfect and we butches don't fit into that picture, literally or figuratively. In conservative spaces, more attention might be paid to "that d*ke in the suit" than to the bride, and some fragile women can't handle that. Also they want the pictures to be symmetrical.

Source: am Southern

I was thinking blazers or combat boots as well. Nothing screams gay more than broken into, well loved pairs of work boots to go with an otherwise femme dress. Throw a leather jacket on it if you're feeling yourself

OP, the thing is that any ways we can think of to make a dress look dykey are probably going to upset this bride just as much as wearing a suit. I can't see her being okay with you wearing Doc Martens, for example, or a green suit jacket type dress.

Terrible. Boots with dresses make it a lot better. I did that once lol.

"Thanks for the invitation! No" is how I would respond if my hypothetical SIL asked me to do that, but for me it's a matter of dignity and I've had to do it before. Maybe it's different for you but just know you have every right to not wear feminine clothing, and letting yourself get pushed around now could lead to other people trying you later down the line. You've got to decide for you what you?re willing to take.

And this comment is funny because the OP before kept misuing the word drag lol but they weren't even talking about actual drag unlike this person:

Have you considered going full on drag queen? If you are going to put on a costume, you might as well go all out. Wig, makeup, all the sequins...

I think it's easier for some people because it's performative and not just 'every day femininity.' I think some people use goth aesthetics in a similar way.

Would they maybe be okay with a kilt?

This person clarifies that they're not fully butch and that their opinion is unpopular:

Time for my unpopular opinion: the last time I did this, I just went full femme and treated it like drag (but I'm a lot more genderqueer than consistently butch, so take that for what it's worth). I did wear a Hawaiian shirt and khakis to the rehearsal dinner the night before, though.

My press-on nails made it through the photos and the ceremony, and then popped off one by one during the reception, which was kind of hilarious.

(The friends whose wedding I was in absolutely would have been thrilled if I had suited instead of dressed but it was easier to dress for a lot of reasons).

Whatever you decide I hope things go as well as they can!

Yeah, don't go. Your brother's fiance is a lesbophobe.

Also southern here... I have adorned many a dress for the sake of my friends while in my 20s. Because Pictures!?! That they won't look at in their wedding album. I am 44 now, and if a family member or friend asked me to do so, I would tell them to FO. The beauty of aging = the fewer Fs you give.

Like 2-3 months ago I had to get super serious and assertive with a friend while we were taking about her wedding because she couldn't seem to wrap her head around the fact that there isn't a single person in my life that I would wear a dress for, including her. She was fine with me wearing a suit up until the point that I said that, and then was (I think jokingly) upset that I was dead serious, and then a bit actually upset that I stuck to my guns and refused adamantly that I wouldn't wear a dress in any situation and that I was kind of offended we were still talking about this after my first refusal.

I've had others be similarly perplexed/upset by my feelings on skirts and dresses. Like no, I wouldn't wear a dress if my future wife wanted me to wear one. I wouldn't wear one if my grandma asked me to. I wouldn't wear one if it was part of a dress code that I had to (I did that [BEEP] in high school and it made me feel like shit). Dresses and skirts look great on women and power to anyone who feels good wearing them, but they make me want to curl up in a ball and die.

End Rant

That guy could just read some of their discussions it's easy to do now on the internet. If he thinks it's weird that that person reacted that way he's obviously not aware. I probably should have just asked him how he'd feel about being expected to wear a dress but he'd probably see it as some kind of challenge and claim to be fine with it to be contrarian.

Tbh this is probably a big part of why it's less of a big deal most of the time for women to wear masculine clothing. Because they're just like [BEEP] off.

Some people hate it so much they describe it as dysphoria (post from another thread):

I was one of the bridesmaids for my brother's weddings so unfortunately I had to wear a dress for the majority of it which did nothing but demolish my confidence and ensured me that I might have some form of dysphoria by how uncomfortable I was. However, since you're not a bridesmaid, you're lucky enough to get to wear whatever. I'd say put on your best suit and tie. So what if you get a couple of weird looks? [BEEP] them! You're there for your friend. Beside, the real focus is her and her spouse and that's all they should care about. If she's just happy to see you there, then what's the big deal if you look a little gay?

Sorry for the rambling. My point is to just go for it.

I don't think people get how terrible it makes some people feel. Personally I've worn dresses before with only minor discomfort sometimes, when I'd present more femme than normal it would feel like I was in drag, though I basically never wear dresses (at this point I can't even remember the last time but it's been a decade at least,) I'd also do stuff like wear trainers and boots with them. But I'm pretty androgynous presentation wise and have a fairly feminine personality. If I was a very masculine person it would probably be intolerable.

This did make me wonder about genuinely androgynous (not masc or femme,) wedding outfits though. I found this which is kind of cool:



Not fully into the end result but I like the idea of capes lol.

[Nyctophilia]

And I have cramps because I think I'm getting my period. And I kind of have to go see my dad soon. Was thinking tomorrow. Was thinking today but put it off.

The situation has not improved.

[Nyctophilia]

Lol I've worried about this. That that's how things work for me because I think I'm quite avoidant. But I didn't get a lot of experience in the past + my crushes were basically never reciprocated anyway. It's also not exactly an issue now though because I have no social life so don't date.

This is a perfect example of what's called an 'Avoidant' Attachment Style

I don't think the problem for me is specifically someone I'm attracted to expressing positive emotional feelings about me or at least that hasn't bothered me though in most cases it's more ambiguous so probably doesn't count for these purposes as they weren't expressions of strong clearly romantic interest. But I think the issue is like when I'm not feeling the same way and they express stronger feelings and also if they get sexual too fast.

But if I don't really know someone enough, or talk to them much than I definitely end up idealising them and inventing them in my mind.

Something I've learned is this: unavailable people actually hate themselves a lot, so that's why they find it off putting if you like them.

That's really only fearful avoidant people. Dismissive avoidant people judge other people and have a better view of themselves typically (there are a bunch of other differences in thinking too. Like dismissive avoidant people usually think depending on other people is weak and value independence a lot etc. So they devalue relationships on a surface level.) I'm assuming there are people with a negative view of themselves + others too. Hyper critical and untrusting etc. Sounds like me probably.

Maybe these are some of the bigger differences. I dunno sounds about right (I think fearful avoidant people are probably more agreeable on average so have a harder time saying no to people. They also care what others think about them more and probably feel rejection more strongly):

17. Fears

Fearful avoidants are afraid their romantic relationship will end. It's hard for them to work through their defenses and get closely attached to someone. They don't fall in love too easily.

Dismissive avoidants can fall in love easily, but they're afraid of commitment. Commitment seems to go against their core value of freedom. They feel trapped when they have to commit.

They also fear losing themselves and their cherished 'space' in the relationship.

2. Boundaries

Fearful avoidants have weak boundaries. They tend to have people-pleasing tendencies and care too much about what others think of them.

Dismissive avoidants tend to have firm boundaries. They hardly care what others think of them.

3. Openness

Fearful avoidants are open with people immediately, but they push back when they get too close.

Dismissive avoidants experience a tremendous amount of difficulty in opening up with people. They seem distant, and it takes a lot to open them up.

4. View of self and others

Fearful avoidants have a negative view of self but a positive view of others. They're quick to blame themselves when things go wrong.

Dismissive avoidants have a positive view of self, resulting in high self-esteem. They generally have a negative view of others.

8. Source of pride

Because fearful avoidants have a positive view of others, good relationships are a source of pride.

For dismissive avoidants, self-reliance is a source of pride.

I think both groups tend to adopt the same coping mechanisms (or very similar ones anyway,) but have different underlying reasons for doing so. It's not exactly easy to find concrete clarification of the differences though tbh.

Reddit is often entertaining:

What is the difference between FAs and DAs?

I think the deactivation phase has some overlaps between FAs and DAs and I have a hard time identifying FAs and DAs. Please explain through examples and specific traits for more clarity.

FAs are a lot more fast-paced and hot + cold, their emotions can be more turbulent as they're getting both anxious and avoidance triggers. I'm not DA so this is just a summary I've seen from other DAs about key traits: DAs trend slower and steadier, they can sometimes come across as colder than their actual sentiments due to deactivation and bc their behaviour is more restrained in general as their emotions are more locked away or they are trying to not make their emotions someone else's problem.

Is it important to identify FAs vs DAs? A lot of people say attachment theory is more useful as a personal insight tool and not something to use to analyse other people (especially as people feeling anxious can use it in some negative ways rather than to constructively think about their own attachment triggers and what boundaries they want to set in a relationship).

I loved this:

...nah. 50-60% of the population are secure. 15-20% are on the AP scale. At the upper end, you have 80% of people out there wanting a relationship that draws them closer, not pushes them farther apart.

Personally, I want to be in a thing that would mean that if I was sick or needed help, my person would be there for me, and vicaversa. Sounds trite but it's actually pretty important, from an evolutionary standpoint.

AP is anxious-preoccupied I guess.

Nah what? They said nothing to evoke this weird pseudoscientific piss fight.

There's no piss fight. I was making a comment, that's all. That's what reddit's for. :)

Also, it's not pseudoscientific. I'm going by the numbers from multiple sources here but being exact about said numbers in a casual conversation seemed to detract away from what I was trying to say. You don't always have to bring scientific papers to a comments section when you're expressing an opinion.

It's very much a piss fight when your comment boils down to "we're better", very irrelevant whatever you think Reddit is for.

It is pseudoscientific. And I'm not the one who brought in science, you did, to sound like you know what you're talking about. You just brought in bad science because you don't. Even if your numbers were correct, your claim was still bogus because secures are pro-social (which is what you were trying to call an evolutionary advantage) but AP behaviors are not pro-social, wanting them to be so doesn't change that fact. Not to mention DA doesn't mean that you don't want the things you listed.

APs are not better. This person said nothing to provoke you into inserting a cocky claim about them being better. Your argument was weak on top of all of that. Your problem is that you allow a lot of nuances and excuses and humanity for APs while you see avoidants as an inexcusable unreasonable monolith, and therein lies your problem. Your reasoning will remain weak if you continue doing that, the gap and bias in your understanding of AT is very obvious to any objective outsider who's been learning about this for a while.

'Nah'

(that wasn't the end of the argument obviously.)

15. Triggers

Things that trigger a fearful avoidant:

Becoming attached
Inferiority
Blame
Criticism

Things that trigger a dismissive avoidant:

Demands
Tantrums
Drama
Criticism

Have you ever experienced enmeshment before? I frequently see this type of rhetoric here, where DAs are scapegoated as the "bad" attachment style because people try to make arguments that their behavior is more than APs. I?d argue that comparing suffering is generally unhelpful, and if you look on Reddit you?ll find stories about people hurt by their AP ex as well as their DA ex (though it seems DAs seem to talk about it less unless prompted). Experiencing an enmeshed partner, or being on the receiving end of anxious preoccupation can also be traumatic. Just as being on the end of DA avoidant behavior can be. They are both qualified as insecure styles for a reason. I'd argue that when I see someone dismissing one style as being "less damaging," most often it?s a way to try and avoid self reflection and preserve one's ego.

Hum, not sure about that. Avoidance is scapegoated because hot and cold behaviours are a typical feature AND a typical feature of manipulative strategies.

If you listen to pick-up artist coaches and dating expert who are all about extracting something from partners, it comes from the avoidant playbook, there is nothing there coming from the anxious playbook.

DA and FA don't dl it on purpose, but hot and cold behaviour is easily abusive and toxic in a way than whiny smothering from AP is not.

Disclaimer: I'm ap

I had multiple people react in very emotionally unstable ways to rejection from me and get very obsessed with me when I didn't really feel equivalent emotions at all and it's weird when you're not purposefully trying to get that response but you're socially naive at the time and you even explained some stuff and they ignore that too and don't care. And part of the reason a lot of these guys have all these women aggressively trying to destroy them is that no emotionally stable people will put up with what they're doing. So they attract people with anxious-preoccupied attachment styles etc which reaffirms their 'bitches be crazy' mentality they usually have. And they're advising other people to do this too. Assuming it was a process they came to in a machiavellian planned way in the first place it's monumentally stupid. Eg: look at Andrew Tate lol.

I think the idea is they're all unhealthy in different ways and there are personality disorders that mimic some traits but that aren't the same thing (or it's not supposed to be the same thing.) Anxious-preoccupied is a bit like BPD, dismissive-avoidant is probably associated with antisocial, schizoid and maybe narcissistic PD's. Fearful avoidant seems like avoidant PD and vulnerable narcissism to me. But this study said it wasn't associated with cluster B:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16289754/

The relationship between attachment styles and Cluster B personality disorders were examined among prisoners, forensic inpatients and controls from the general population. Forensic inpatients and prisoners reported significantly less frequently the secure attachment style (Relationship Questionnaire) and significantly more the fearful attachment style compared to the normal controls. Both forensic groups could not be distinguished from each other. Further, prisoners, forensic inpatients and controls could not be differentiated on the basis of the dismissing nor the preoccupied attachment style. With respect to personality pathology, almost all relationships between Cluster C pathology, on the one hand, and attachment styles, on the other, were significant. Cluster A pathology was clearly related to the secure and fearful attachment style. With respect to cluster B pathology, the results were more specific but also less clear. The results were strongly dependent on the way the personality pathology variables were treated, as either categorical or dimensional. None of the cluster B personality pathology variables were associated with the fearful attachment style and histrionic personality pathology was negatively associated with the dismissing attachment style. Antisocial personality features were associated with a dismissing attachment style. Borderline personality pathology, when treated as a categorical variable, was significantly related to the preoccupied attachment style. These results show that (1) cluster A and cluster C pathology are more strongly associated with attachment than cluster B, (2) treating personality data as either dimensional or categorical is of major importance to the conclusions that can be drawn, (3) it is important to control for the influence of co-morbid personality pathology when examining the relationship between (Cluster B) personality pathology and attachment.

Sort of what I said but not quite. I feel like people often don't bother to articulate the differences between fearful and dismissive in general. Fearful avoidance does seem like AvPD but I feel like there's a point where those traits blend with vulnerable narcissism like I say.

Obviously secure attatchment is best.

[Nyctophilia]

From a thread about Paglia's comments about androgyny and societal collapse. Most people were in agreement like her comments about Greek statues getting noodlier over the years (that was how she described them lol. Like noodly limbs. Basically different aesthetic preferences I guess over time,) was just obviously responsible for everything going wrong in that culture and applicable to everything ever.

There's always someone claiming culture is on the verge of collapse. This sub has been doing so for five years now.

Conservatives have been doing so since the 1980s. It's called eschatology.

Also culture has already been through multiple periods of fashionable androgeny. Last was in the 1970s, before that it was the 1920s.

What she's saying has no basis in fact and reality. There's not even a proposed mechanism of action. It's not directly correlated, she could pick any random thing and make this argument. It's irrational.

...also, she herself is androgenous.

No they've been doing this for thousands of years. It's actually insane. No one is learning anything.

"The Danes made themselves too acceptable to English women by their elegant manners and their care of their person. They combed their hair every day, bathed every Saturday, and even changed their garments often. They set off their persons by many such frivolous devices. In this manner, they laid siege to the virtue of the married women, and persuaded the daughters, even of the nobles to be their concubines." - John of Wallingford

edit: How can I make this post even worse/extra oh yes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtOvBOTyX00

There's actually a version of this with Loki:



I can't ship it because I ship Loki/Darcy. So now I'm linking this video instead which is butchering your mythology (well MCU is I mean and Loki is suddenly English and Sigyn is Irish.) In fairness the video was created by a Swedish person:

Here's a little video about Loki and Sigyn. Love Loki in the marvel movies and since I'm from Sweden, from which a part of the mythology comes from, I wanted to read more about it. Found out Loki actually had a wife name Sigyn and that she was truly loyal to Loki so I wanted to do a video about them.

I guess when you think about it this is like really slow pay back or something.

I mean I don't discriminate I've also read Jesus/Satan fanfiction. And Jesus/Satan/Loki fanfiction. Well there was one fanfic where Loki (mythology Loki not MCU Loki,) helped Satan crossdress. As Richard Dawkins would say the UK is a culturally Christian nation so. I'm doing my part by reading fanfiction years ago. Netflix are mad they didn't think of this first.

I mean I ship Loki in mythology with Angrboda more I think. Just because of this:

Loki ate some of the heart, the thought-stone of a woman,roasted on a linden-woodfire, he found it half-cooked;Lopt was impregnated by a wicked woman,from whom every ogress on earth is descended.

Some people interpret the heart as being Angbroda. And also a witch. So there's witchy vibes.

Did Loki give birth to a monster?

A heart ate Loki,-- | in the embers it lay, And half-cooked found he | the woman's heart;-- With child from the woman | Lopt soon was, And thence among men | came the monsters all.

My questions are:

-Why did Loki eat that heart?

-Who or what was that woman? Was she a notable character in Norse mythology? If not,what race did she belong to?

-Why was her heart burnt?

-What/who exactly did Loki give birth to?

-How did he carry and give birth to it/him/her? Did he turn into a female to carrry and give birth to it?

Are you asking if there's a legend about how this specific female character turned into a male to impregnate a gender-swapped Loki, or if there's a Kama Sutra Edda?

Tumblr had some thoughts:

The birth-mother of Fenrir, Hel, and Jormungandr is, for the most part, said to be Angrboda, with Loki as the father. I disagree with this claim, and believe Loki to be the birth-mother. There is support for both the former and latter, but that point is not made clear enough in our surviving sources to make a proper conclusion.

[long theory here]

I may be nothing now but I will rise
I'll have more followers than Jesus Christ

According to Wilson, "Slave Called Shiver" is about feelings of "unreturned love". He said, "['Slave Called Shiver']'s a very perverse love song, yeah. I mean, it's an unrequited love song. It's a love song with somebody who's obsessed with someone else, but none of that affection is returned? It's about someone who's very much in love and obsessed with somebody else. That love is not returned and so there's a slightly violent perverse undercurrent."

Time travelling Vikings reading my posts: We have to go back. Coming to this island was a huge mistake.

I don't think it ever really stops in entertainment + creative fields the expression just changes. I don't know why people focus on specific decades because it's literally constant. That's why the idea it's associated with 'end times' is particuarly stupid.

This isn't everything of course there's so much more:

Like you say there was androgyny in the 70s (putting in effort not to post a Rush music video =P Bowie is too obvious too):



No OK I have to include this because against all odds these kind of 70s glasses came back in 2022~:



and in the 80s:





It's the 80s though so I have to mention some goth rock band that hates the goth label. You know like The Sisters of Mercy.

I totally believe that God called me, a non-binary, hard-of-hearing person, to follow the path of being a religious Sister of Mercy. How can one not listen to that call, to put one's full trust and faith in going on that journey? And how can one not be authentic to oneself when doing so?

Um what no? Google? That's not what. Lol.

Oh I know.



"Androgynous Noise Hand Permeates"

lol it's in the title.













I'm not including mullets in this post if I can help it.

and in the 90s:

Boys in the girl's room
Girls in the men's room
You free your mind in your androgyny - Androgyny, Garbage













Girls who want boys
Who like boys to be girls
Who do boys like they're girls
Who do girls like they're boys
Always should be someone you really love - Girls & Boys, Blur



and in the 2000s:

I was mostly trying to limit this to music but yeah





The tie thing was iconic I suppose I have to include that too:





I mean I don't need to- we all lived through this era not long ago lol.





















and in the 2010s:

What if I just posted photos of myself no lol. There are 2000s photos too.







At a certain point knives/swords became a theme of this post lol. But I have left out Kate Bush she has a bunch of photoshoots/videos with swords.

















I almost forgot Bones pink coat:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqSpI1Jm0YE

No this was a moment. I think I had that as an avatar at one point actually lmfao. Or if not I thought about it.

and in the 2020s:





It's giving this lol:



It's kind of impressive that he's been doing this since the 90s and he's aged about 10 years in that time lol.











Cause of the camo jacket person in the video. I don't want to screenshot it but. Actually. Speaking of camo jackets:



She combined a lollipop with a camo jacket? That's amazing. 10/10 no notes.





I like how this photo is the inverse of a menacing guy with a puppy:













1920s?

Yeah and:

1950s:

This is actually from a 1949 film called I Was a Male War Bride but I want to end on a particular video for the 1940s because it's very dramatic.



I'm going to leave 'conservatives' this decade as a treat. They're not conserving androgyny.

1930s:



1940s:



Of course you can go back before this century and can go back centuries. And Paglia knows this she's just bored and everyone buying into it is bored.

Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here - Macbeth, Shakespeare



Earl of Southampton, Shakespeare's patron

I just don't get it anymore. I thought the invention of film etc would put a stop to this but it hasn't and surely nothing will.

[Nyctophilia]

I found this article and I have some thoughts about it. Mostly because it seems unecessarily gendered in the first place with what it's talking about. Like the elephant in the room is that there are tons of single guys. It's The Guardian though so I guess this is their thing.

Western society has always struggled with the issue of what to do with unmarried women. Take the religious mania for persecuting so-called witches in the middle ages. Communities fixated on single women - their era's "other" - not only because they were suspicious of their alternative lifestyles, but because of the collective guilt over their inability to cater or care for them.

When single women weren't assumed to be witches, they were often taken to be prostitutes ? to such an extent that the two terms were interchangeable, including in court documents.

No wonder modern spinsters feel conflicted about where we stand, and whether we're all we should be. When Professor Paul Dolan, a behavioural scientist at LSE, published research claiming that single women without children were happier than married ones, he was taken aback by the response. "I had lots of emails from single women saying thank you," says Dolan, "because now people might start believing them when they say they're actually doing all right. But more interesting was the reactions from people who didn't want to believe it.

"I'd underestimated how strongly people felt: there was something really insulting about choosing not to get married and have kids. It's all right to try and fail - but you'd better try. So with these competing narratives, you would be challenged internally as a single woman, where your experiences are different to what they're expected to be."

I think relationships are one of those things where if you're in a good relationship you're probably going to be a lot happier, but if it's not a good relationship you'd probably be happier single.

But there I go, living down to the spinster stereotype of envy and bitterness. How is it possible that, despite being raised by a feminist mother and enjoying a life rich with friendships and meaningful employment, I still feel the stigma of that word? Or fear that, even in middle age, I haven?t achieved the status of a true adult woman?

I think this is probably not ideological per se. If Humans weren't sensitive to social pressure and in many cases didn't have some genetic push to find partners and reproduce (I think intelligent women experience this less based on research since they want kids later - and often not at all - and are more the group social pressure has been directed at as a result.) Then we probably would have died out as a species and since Humans are a social species and really borderline eusocial other people are expected to reproduce so groups don't die out because Humans aren't good at living in too small groups. Even though the groups are ginormous now and Humans are everywhere it seems those tendencies are still there. You can manipulate people easily by telling them that birth rates are collapsing etc.

It is time, surely, to change the rules, and the conversation. As the population of never-married women expands, we should be honest about what it meant, and means, to be one. We should celebrate our identity and the life experience that has given it to us. We should reclaim our history and stop being defined by others. Why not start by taking back that dread word, spinster?

this gendered framing is so bizarre and historically inaccurate. First of all throughout history most people who didn't reproduce were men. It's just that before the modern era most of these men would die through war etc.

Cut to now having such a large percentage of single, childless women outside of war time is really an anomaly of the modern time period with the technological changes that have occured.

Also there are still more single men than women based on most statistics I see shared around. In a lot of countries anyway. Women are dating the same guys or having relationships with other women.

More to the point in my own personal life all of my older female cousins are married with kids so that's 3 women. I have three older male cousins too one has schizophrenia, has not been married and has no kids, I think according to stuff my dad said on some recent visit to him he might actually also be in some kind of psychatric facility. He was diagnosed after trying to stab his sister during a delusional episode. Another older male cousin (his older brother,) is married with kids and another older male cousin on my mum's side is afaik unmarried and has no kids. His sister had a young kid at my grandad's funeral in 2016 and she was supposed to be getting married during covid but that didn't happen and then also her dad died that year (I'm still not sure how.) I have two younger cousins but they're too young to know right now how their life's going to go. The youngest - a girl is still in highschool and her older brother recently graduated uni.

Me and my brother are still single, never married. Neither of us have dated anyone in about a decade. For him I think it's been even longer than me. Think he might have been in some kind of relationship or something while I was living away at uni and before he dropped out probably but can't remember. He had relationships when he was in high school too. Neither of us have kids.

My friend who I was in a relationship with for several months a decade ago before we broke up has been on a few dates since then but has had no relationships, never married, no kids. His sister is married and they have a kid.

I'm non-binary and weird sexually and have a variety of other issues (mostly undiagnosed I think,) so not really a decent example of anything myself. I think under different circumstances/personality traits I probably would have just ended up like other female relatives. But yeah this depends on so many different factors that it's impossible to say.

Eg: Maybe if I was more 'normal' I would have staid (is that a word? Or how you spell that? It's looking weird to me now lol. Oh my god I just realised I mean stayed how did I forget how to spell that word? That's terrible,) with one of the guys I was with before. Although, since I'm pretty sure I would have eventually wanted kids if I had my [BEEP] together and was in a relationship (I never wanted to give birth, but maybe surrogacy.) I'm not sure my relationship with my friend would have lasted regardless because he never wanted kids. He expressed that I think when we were in a relationship and still has that opinion now although he likes playing with his nephew and stuff. I sort of feel like that's an ideal situation in some ways because you get some of the benefits like young kids say cute/funny stuff, but less responsibility lol. I mean kids scare me lol. I don't know how to communicate with them so unless that mysteriously changed with my own kids there's also that.

I just haven't been around enough young kids in my life since I was a kid to really get practice and there's the anxiety. When it's someone else's kid there's also the sense you might say something wrong and the parents will blame you. I saw one of my younger cousins when I was 11 and he was a baby for a bit then mostly lost contact with family and I was still a kid then myself. His sister I've seen on a few occasions including when she was probably about 2-4 I forget exactly, and then probably 7 but these were brief interactions with other family there. Very rarely (I can only think of one time off the top of my head,) strangers kids have approached me in public and I didn't know what to say/do. I also feel like this is connected to my inability to intuitively know what to do with dogs (although I am a bit anxious around them too, I used to be scared of them as a kid and I'm not really now but like mildly anxious because they're so energetic unlike cats which seem more chill to me. I know some dogs are more chill than others though.) Like other people just enter baby/dog talk mode. I'm very analytical and I'd have to exercise that area of my brain basically.

I like the idea of teaching kids things though and taking them to museums and stuff (for some reason whenever I imagine it I always picture taking them to some museum lol.) Just trying to inspire them to get excited about learning stuff in general actually. I've never wanted to be a teacher though I don't like the idea of being around such a large amount of kids. That's another thing if you have kids there will be more kids and other parents and entire cultures. Also don't like the idea of being 'a mother.' Like it's all very gendered. I just want to be a weird alien that came to Earth and has kids now.

In my parent's generation in their families everyone was married except my mum's youngest brother who had a lot of issues too and they also all had/have kids except my dad's older sister who is married and I think wanted kids but couldn't have them. But I'm going off comments my dad said so who knows.

My dad's female friend was married at one point I think or maybe they were just in a long term relationship when I was a kid, she didn't have kids. I don't know if she's ever discussed if she wanted them or not. Because she was always in our life and my parents relationship was broken she had 'kids in her life' so to speak and I don't want to talk about it at length. My family don't communicate about anything serious most of the time and I don't think it's OK at all and the older I've gotten the more it's bothered me especially after hearing my mum talk about stuff as an adult once. Nothing about my parents relationship dynamic seemed good.

My brother's friend was engaged for a bit but has been single for years now and also childless. They're both in their early 30s as am I. He has another male friend who is struggling to date again now since moving back in with parents. He's gay though so the cultural norms/expectations/everything are different anyway. Most gay men end up 'spinsters' (I think Quentin Crisp used that word,) even now gay marriage has been legalised sapphic women are more likely to get married although also more likely to get divorced.

"By heterosexuals the life after death is imagined as a world of light, where there is no parting. If there is a heaven for homosexuals, which doesn't seem very likely, it will be very poorly lit and full of people they can feel pretty confident they will never have to meet again. It is only partly because they are ashamed of themselves and wish to remain unrecognized that this environment seems so desirable. The chief reason is that it makes possible contacts of astounding physical intimacy without the intervention of personality. To either partner, the other is a phallus garlanded with fantasies, chiefly of masculinity. The homosexual world is a world of spinsters. Most homosexuals over the age of twenty-five will play, on the physical level, an active, passive or unspecified role with the same or a different partner from night to night or even from hour to hour, but emotionally they search perpetually for a real man who desires passionately (as opposed to making do with) another man. This being, if he exists, is so rare that one might as well enter a monastery on reaching puberty. The less drastic alternative is to live a real sex life in a dream world. This can best be done in the dark with strangers."

The thing about lighting is weird to me because I've always felt more comfortable in low lit environments. It seems to reduce anxiety. I also like certain tones. I don't like bright white lights.

As modern, single women, we are not supposed to feel that we?re missing out. And so we feel obliged to hide any feelings of shame or inadequacy or longing.

I know I don't want to take my many privileges for granted and I suspect that many single women in a similar position to me dread being thought of as whiny or desperate. And so we don't talk about the subject, and we try not to acknowledge that spinsters still exist. Perhaps that's the reason that, instead of finding my #inspo from modern have-it-all heroines, I prefer to look back and learn from the spinsters who came before.

I relate to this because it's clear to me that no one now knows what they're doing. I don't think they necessarily did in the past either but I don't even think they really want to have real conversations about things anymore. But I mostly have to look back at 'sexual outliers' for lack of a better way of saying it historically speaking, and tbh some of them ended up getting married anyway like Rachilde. She had a kid and she didn't seem to like that experience. I would consider it to have been a mistake for her.

She met Alfred Vallette in 1885 and they married in 1889, despite his disapproval of her writing and her sometimes shocking public behavior. With their marriage, she regrew her hair and adopted a more subdued presentation of herself. A few months after their civil ceremony wedding, their only child was born. Rachilde named their daughter Gabrielle after her own estranged mother. By most accounts, she disliked motherhood and prioritized writing and supporting other writers over her daughter.[9][3][8][10]

Rachilde remained socially active for much of her life, appearing around town with young men even into her sixties and seventies. There were naturally rumors of licentious adultery, but she had always preferred the company of gay men and men like Maurice Barres, for whom there was pleasure in the torture of restraint. In 1935, however, when Rachilde was seventy-five years-old, her husband Alfred Vallette died at his desk. Her truly Bohemian phase had ended with her marriage to Vallette. Her active social presence ended with his death. After more than fifty years, her Tuesday salons came to an end.[16][2]

I think it was Hirschfeld's opinion that people like Rachilde probably shouldn't have kids.

https://scholarworks.wmich.edu/cgi/v...=dissertations

An example can be seen in how Hirschfeld discusses whether people designated male at birth who dressed or desired to dress and/or live as a woman should marry or not. Hirschfeld argued that they should not marry because, "They are mostly very restless spirits, inclined towards adventure, and would find it difficult to chain themselves to domestic duties..." (1910, p. 39 in Stryker and Whittle, 200 Hirschfeld's claims about transsexual women using words that connote traditionally masculine behaviors like "restless" and "adventure", as well as his belief that they would not be suited for "domestic duties" indicate that he did not see transsexual women as fitting into the category of "women".

No... What? I'm trying to find the quote. I remember that part and I'm sure he was talking about those designated female at birth. Why on Earth would he describe feminine males as being restless and needing adventure etc? Why would they even be doing domestic duties as males? Why would that be relevant to bring up?

Look see. This is very important too. He is not talking about transsexuals in the first place. Please stop misreading stuff based on current labels. This seems to be a university based url!

At this time I would like to touch upon one other point, namely, whether these persons appear fitting to enter into marriage. As we discovered, many are married, most even happily. Only in one case (11) was the marriage a truly unhappy one because of the transvestite drive. Of course, in this case the wife was psychopathic, suffered persecution mania, delusions, and for a long time was institutionalized. It is unconditionally advised that a transvestite disclose everything to the spouse. One cannot assume that the unprepared spouse will be so accepting. I was surprised that many wives found no difficulty even traveling with their husbands dressed in women's clothing, or even sitting evenings at the family table, both spouses in women's clothing.

So you can see what gendered language he uses here. When he says transvestite women he does not mean trans women he means genetic females who are masculine.

But even if the wife is accepting of her husband's preference, I still have my doubts as to the suitability of these marriages; it cannot be argued that transvestism belongs to the sexual intermediaries in whose case the outer appearance of the opposite sex is exceptionally considerable. In cases of lesser features, for example, no more than 33 1/3 percent then there can easily be a balance between the married couple, so that the descendants would not be endangered by a hereditary burden. Or the other hand, where the sexual gap of the personality is such a great one, as in our cases, there is such a deviation from the pure sex type that the deviation, even if it should not itself be considered a degeneration can lead to offspring who are psychologically disunified and frivolous who are unstable, degenerated individuals. Of course, I cannot produce any proof of this very theoretical supposition; on the contrary, the children of the transvestites whom I saw gave me the impression of being good and healthy. But the material available at this time is insufficient to dispel expressed fears.

He repeatedly uses male language for amab transvestites. Then since he's not just talking about amab transvestites mentions transvestite women aka afab people:

Raising children today demands one to have nerves of steel. Transvestites who want to raise children must be physically healthy and strong as well as mentally well-developed persons. They must be careful with their choice of marriage partners because of the children. Moreover, I would be against transvestite women marrying. They are mostly very restless spirits, inclined toward adventure, and find it difficult to chain themselves to domestic duties. In fact, most suitable would be--which is in accordance with the wishes of these persons--a transvestite man and a somewhat manly kind of woman, who naturally need not be a transvestite, or a transvestite woman to a womanly man, so that, to quote Schopenhauer [in The World as Will and Idea in the chapter "Metaphysics of Sexual Love" (Die Welt als Wille und Vorstellung: "Metaphysik der Geschlechtsliebe")]: "The degree of his manliness corresponds to the degree of her womanliness"; to be sure, it would be more correct to say in our case the degree of her manliness to the degree of his womanliness.

OK I could see how potentially you could assume he was talking about two groups transvestite men who dress as women but don't identify as women, and then maybe those who do. Since he wrote about a lot of different types of people. However within the book you cite which is not his it quotes from him (I've read this quote in his book before but I forget which book and don't really want to dig further atm):

As the old land-based feudal order was replaced by capitalism, the very existence of transvestite and other transgendered women and men had been largely driven underground. Many were forced to pass as the opposite sex in order to survive. Transvestite women passed as men and became soldiers, pirates and highway robbers. Yet transvestism continued to emerge culturally throughout Europe in holiday celebrations, rituals, carnival days, masquerade parties, theater and opera.

If you know anything about masculine women and trans men throughout history you would know they tend to go off to war and become pirates and [BEEP] like that. You can figure this out easily by not just - what I think they did - reading some random quote somewhere out of context.

Oh god fine let's see if I have the book downloaded.... Even though they don't even cite his book so obviously read this extract from the other book with all the other context too.

Yeah.

So this is how he uses the terms:

No matter how much transvestite men feel like women when dressed in women's clothing and women feel like men when dressed in men's clothing, they still remain aware that in reality it is not so. To be sure, some do imagine and if so, then the wish is the originator of the thought--that their skin is softer, their forms rounder, and their movements more gracious than are usual for men, but they know full well, and often are depressed by the fact that they do not physically belong to the desired sex they love. If they did consider themselves actually to be women, whether cross-dressed or not, as persons with megalomania think they are the Messiah or millionaires or even the emperor and pope in one person, then it would be an illusory idea, and the condition would have to be addressed as mental illness, as being insane, as paranoia.

He uses transvestite women once in the entire text just in that part but he also talks about afab people far less in general in that book - there's some discussion about pirates again lol...

As far as she can remember, she never felt she was a girl. Whenever she played house she always wanted to be the father. She preferred to play pirate, at the helm with saber and whip.

I think her name was Mary? But yeah 'her adventerous life' etc. I didn't read this third section of the book as throughly when reading it years ago but even without this it still seemed obvious to me:

The British pirate Maria Read, too, who in the early eighteenth century made the seas uncertain, had been systematically raised as a boy by her mother, herself of the manly kind. Her mother hired her out as a servant to a French lady. However, Maria applied for a job as a sailor on a British warship and thereby began her adventurous life, which ended only when she fell in love with a soldier, whom she married [E. Whitehead. Life, Deeds and Fate of the Most Remarkable British Robbers and Pirates, Etc. (Leben, Taten und Schicksale der merkwuerdigsten englischen Raeuber und Piraten usw.) German by J. Sporschill. Leipzig 1834, Part 2, pp. 75-81.] Bloch [Sex Life in England (Geschlechtsleben in England). Part 3. Berlin 1903, p. 56] considers this female pirate, according to her love story, very justifiably as "doubtlessly heterosexual."

I really don't know why they would assume he was talking about someone amab when saying transvestite women. Also I think it can be safely assumed by his repeated use of tranvestite men when talking about amab people that transvestite woman means an afab person like the above.

How annoying!

You're the one who projected your own sex stereotypes onto your assumption of what he was saying lol.

I get it - I don't read entire books typically but you have to read enough that you're sure you undertand the quote when writing academic papers at least. This isn't your personal blog.

So yeah one incredibly weird relationship situation where everyone pretends it's fine, and everyone else who is long term single and childless I've known has been male.

Most of the female YouTubers who talk about their relationship status are in relationships or married. Some older in their 30s having kids but the younger ones don't have kids. There's one I can think of who is probably about 27 who was in a relationship but has been single for a couple of years I think? But I'm not keeping constant tabs on that just aware. The YouTubers who are or might be single are usually [BEEP] like this one genderfluid trans guy in the UK who seems to have been single for many years and is also autistic and has ADHD. No kids as is the trend. There are some married couples I follow who don't want kids and have cats instead. Then there are other people who are [BEEP] and haven't disclosed their relationship status.

Even in the article her sister is having a kid:

But now my little sister was having a baby, and I was single and approaching a big birthday. The odds were increasingly against me ? even if the notorious statistic that you?re more likely to be killed by a terrorist than you are to find a husband after the age of 40 has, in recent years, been debunked.

Anecdotally I'm aware of older women - you can find them online with mental health issues who are long term single, and the journalists are clearly not doing OK. Mostly it seems to not be very gendered or to the extent it is there are more men who are single. It's hard to get data on relationships for obvious reasons but there are definitely less peope who are married now but that doesn't necessarily mean they're not in relationships. I think it's more than 50% of adults in my age group (30-34) who are unmarried in the UK.

I'd be surprised if statistically women are in general more likely to be single. It even seems that outside of weird articles like this most of the people complaining online are male. Even the women who do complain or form movements seem to be more a response to the years of men complaining and PUA and general sexism online so they want revenge for that so they've started their own weird movements to get revenge. It's not really about being single even most of the time. And a lot of those women are younger as well.

Like this woman just has evil vibes lol:



It's not often someone will speak as though they're a super villain with malice dripping off every word but yeah lol. And it does remind me of YouTubers like Sandman but the female equivalent. Not even masking the psychopathy lol. What a time to be alive.

And PUA + manosphere guys and people like that I think care more about status etc than being single as well and are mostly anoyed about feminism or whatever.

The fact that the average age at marriage (in heterosexual couples) has never been later - 31.5 for women in the UK, 33.4 for men - offers little comfort, because the singles market is at its most crowded between the ages of 35 and 47, and in that market women outnumber men.

This is another thing about our culture I don't get because in theory you can date younger or older men. If younger men and older women don't want to date each other than maybe they should acknowlege that's their own issue? I realise there's a huge stigma attatched to that which is something worth complaining about (but instead neurotic puritans are going to do the opposite and complain about age and height gap relationships on social media being pedophilia OK,) but otherwise. Probably not helped by the 353535 news stories about attractive blond women (I swear they're always blond lol,) having sex with teenage boys. At any rate most of those women are in their 20s. There's an epidemic of hot exclusively female teachers and other attractive women in their early-mid 20s having sex with teenage boys I'm told. It feels very legit and not at all just what gets attention.

If you have a society where every generation has less kids than the previous generation and every guy wants to date women and teen girls aged 14-25 and women are encouraged to only date men their own age but realistically some date older men if they have enough status etc.. that's going to create obvious problems. I'm not saying that's what's happening - some people want to argue that's what's happening. I think people have preferences and then date outside of them sometimes if they have to but a lot of people these days will settle for online sexual content etc instead of having sex or relationships where they have to settle. This isn't a problem necessarily depends on if people are content and fulfilled and even then realistically most people historically probably weren't. You have to find ways to be OK in spite of your circumstances I think and some people have personalities which make them more unhappy no matter what too.

But if you promote any of those norms eg older women shouldn't date younger men but it's OK for older men to date younger women you can't really complain about it. How did you think it was going to work for every guy to get a wife who is 25 or under numbers wise lol?

This attitude is counterproductive unless you want to increase societal chaos (this is from 1992 so I guess Cher has been dating younger men for a while):

Paglia usually refers to her private life as a disaster. Through the years she has had relationships with both women and men and for a while considered herself a lesbian. "But lesbians don't like me," she notes, in part because she insists that most women are bisexual, that the role of hormones accounts for an inevitable attraction between the sexes. Lately Paglia has been going out with men. But, she asks, "what man is going to take me seriously? I'm not a nurturer. Men have flashes of ego and confidence followed by relapses. They have to be stroked, and I don't have that patience." There is also the age problem. Recently she dated men around her age, 44, but found them over the hill sexually. She would prefer younger men, but her pride restrains her. "Like there's something faintly ridiculous about Cher with that young guy: she looks like a dowager with a gigolo." Some dowager.

I can't say Cher has great taste in men based on her current choice (he admitted to cheating on his ex with at least 12 women,) but plenty of younger women than her were going for the same guy anyway. So clearly a lot of people don't care/don't have better options lol.

I mean Cher has other things to do and had kids already I guess. But it doesn't seem like a smart idea to shame people endlessly who have nothing. They will of course want revenge.

I do think Cher's comments here are kind of funny though as I think I said before in another post (I can't remember):



^ The editing in this video pretty funny and surreal like just random clips of the people who work in this takeaway and at one point she randomly says she stole a car once.

She asks her what's one thing she thinks women should do once:

Go out with a younger man.

She also said she's said in the past one thing she wouldn't do is date younger men but she's clearly done this before cause that's was Paglia is talking about in 1992 lol.

But she's spoken before about how older men don't like her lol.

"If I hadn't met younger men in my life, I would've never had a date. Because older men just didn't like me all that much, do you know what I mean? I have had a couple of boyfriends that were hovering around my age, but they just didn't like me for some reason. Maybe younger men don't care if you're funny or outrageous and want to do stupid things and you have a strong personality. I'm not giving up my personality for anybody, ok?"

I think I only know one Cher song. This one of course:



I hate that I'm using this as an adjective now apparently but everything about this song and video is incredibly y2k.

Oh wait no I've heard If I Could Turn Back Time as well. This isn't my style of pop generally (or that song - If I Could Turn Back Time - doesn't appeal either way,) but I like the above video because it's nostalgic for my childhood specifically. It's very segaworld which I never went to in London and The Matrix films etc. It's a playstation (the original playstation,) demo disc. It's a European disco in France specifically. It's not quite Daft Punk but you know.

I'm a pretty tough guy. Bearded construction worker, weightlifter, the whole 9. But this song drops in Wawa while I'm getting coffee and I start dancing like my mom

There's always a massively upvoted comment like this on any older pop songs.

But she's able to date younger guys because she's famous and very rich. If you wanted to be cynical about it you could say that it incrases their status which is useful later if they wanted to date younger women. But regardless it's not something I think that's easy to do if you're not perhaps in your 30s or so and very conventionally attractive or like Cher pretty glamarous, famous, rich, popular with women so it's like dating a queen or something.

And I mean an actual queen did actually do that lol:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend...rine_the_Great

Well the gist of what they're saying is correct but who wrote this lol? 'The flamboyant and powerful' oh and she was an empress I guess too:

During and after the reign of the flamboyant and powerful Empress Catherine II of Russia, whose long rule led to the modernisation of the Russian Empire, many urban legends arose, some legends based on true events, concerning her sexual behaviour.

Catherine had about 22 male lovers throughout her life,[1] some of whom would reap political benefits from their relationship with her, and many of whom were relatively younger. In addition to her sexual relationships, her multiple relationships with Russian nobles, as well as unfounded allegations of her being a nymphomaniac or a libertine, and unfounded rumours that she liked to collect erotic furniture, and an atmosphere of palace intrigue cultivated by her son Paul I of Russia, led to negative portrayals of Catherine.[clarification needed]

Some called her the "Messalina of the Neva", while others termed her a nymphomaniac.[2] There is also a legend that she died while having sex with a horse.[3]

It's either shade or fans wrote this. It's so weird. Were the adjectives necessary? I feel like the tone is different from some articles lol.

Flamboyant.



I'm often too lazy to find a source besides wikipedia but this has been widely discussed.

Rumours of Catherine's private life had a small basis in the fact that she took many young lovers, even in old age. (Lord Byron's Don Juan, around the age of 22, becomes her lover after the siege of Ismail (1790), in a fiction written only about 25 years after Catherine's death in 1796.)[4] This practice was not unusual by the court standards of the day, nor was it unusual to use rumour and innuendo of sexual excess politically. One of her early lovers, Stanislaw August Poniatowski, was later supported by her to become a king of Poland.[5] This would not be the first nor last instance where the Queen would promote one of her lovers to political positions in order to solidify her own position and strengthen her support. For example, Grigory Orlov, an artillery officer from St. Petersburg; helped the queen in the coup against Peter III, and when the Queen took power, she rewarded him by making him a count, as well as naming him General-In-Chief.[6]

Byron wrote fanfiction? That's pretty based. Actually Shakespeare did too. No one can criticise fanfiction ever again now lol. Nope.

[Nyctophilia]

Lol the interviewer from that Cher interview is being interviewed in this video:



I was surprised tbh by how she got to interview such super famous people I thought maybe she had connections but apparently she built her channel independently. I have seen a couple of other channels who have managed to interview famous musicians (but not at that level,) with multi million subscribers because when you reach those numbers if you reach out to people sometimes it can work. Also people who have interviewed other famous people with several thousands of subscribers.

And I know Abroadinjapan managed to create a video with Ken Watanabe which was possibly the first time I noticed someone who had been in Hollywood films being interviewed by someone on YouTube who I remember starting out at a much smaller level that was weird.

Also it'sblackfriday the goth YouTuber has interviewed I thnk a bunch of goth and alternative musicians but none of them are really on that scale either it's still cool to me because I like many of those musicians. I wouldn't be able to do that lol I'd get too anxious if I was a fan of their work.

But she makes an interesting point about how fame works now like you can have millions of subscribers and nobody will really know you. I do think at a certain point though you do reach a point where if you're visible you start to get noticed by people irl.

I don't think I'd recognise the example she brings up Mr Beast because I've heard of him but I've never watched his content.

It's also really weird because you are removed from your audience and the whole fame process. Like I have thousands of subscribers on one channel and videos with thousands or tens of thousands of views and the idea of all those people being in a room is insane but like they're not because they just watch my videos. Since I don't really network or anything I'm even removed and I would find that very hard because of the anxiety again. I don't show my face either because when you become 'known' even online you can't really take that back so I'm not comfortable with that atm. My brother has done stuff like that before in person back when he made YT content but he eventually drifted away from it so doesn't now. The same thing is happening to me right now which is not good. Because I really want to at least finish this series I'm working on.

I'll respond to messages online though like someone asked me recently if they could make videos in Russian talking about some of my stuff and other people already have (not in Russian in general,) which I realised after searching after they asked. And that was odd nice but odd because that person was so excited playing this thing I made. Like it feels very surreal to me sometimes because again I'm so removed.

And sometimes people bring my channel up on social media and other forums or talk about it, or have screenshots as their avatars, or mention my channel. A pretty big YouTuber (like over a million subscribers I dunno how many they're on now,) once included a screenshot from one of my video thumbnails in one of theirs lol and larger channels that make related content have suggested my channel to their viewers before and things like that.

But with that exception of that one video which didn't matter because she didn't credit anyone in the video whose clips etc she used actually lol (someone else was complaining about that but I don't think most of the time you get any views from that honestly very rarely unless maybe it's some kind of full on collab thing and you're always communicating because of the parasocial aspect,) it's all within this niche community that's very contained. Which is good for now because I'm definitely not functionoing on a level (you can see from my posts here lol,) where if I ever got super insane levels of fame for some reason I would be able to cope with that. I would definitely have some kind of breakdown.

"Are you not having a breakdown right now?"

I don't know you'd hope so wouldn't you? But I think there are deeper levels of insanity lol and definitely deeper levels of anxiety.

Also I'm too scared to check my own YT comment section atm, and have also been avoiding other sites on/off on certain accounts + subreddits although get less activity there.

That's another thing because of how fame online works it can probably sneak up on you I've seen that happen to some people where they've suddenly realised the dynamic shift and they can no longer relax and have to deal with all that stress so.

But it's very like.. There's online fame and real life fame and sometimes you can be more famous online than some people and have no real world impact or visibility.

Like Contrapoints has over a million subscribers - possibly two million or more I'm not keeping track but I feel like because she's a trans woman who's relatively famous and has talked about being trans a lot and she's been talked about by like news sources etc a lot and was also framed as this political figure 'deradicalising men' or something at one point - that was a spin journalists were doing. And now she's hung out with Hillary Clinton I think (who I would not vote for personally but that's neither here nor there.) She has an insane amount of reach. But there are YouTubers who have much less influence who have way more subscribers so that's interesting too. Because the two don't correlate necessarily.

There's actually some pretty famous bands that play gigs live and everything and only have 10s of thousands of YouTube subscribers. And that's so weird for me if I think about it because I usually don't. Like there are bands and musicians whose music I really like and they'll play live. Drab Majesty is a really great example - they've been written about in some music journalist sources 'music journalist sources' that's a thing. They've been written about, have a wikipedia article, have toured and all that. But they only have like 13k subscribers on YouTube. And their subreddit for fans has maybe 400 followers I think I saw before. And I wanted them to come to the UK because I think on one tour they didn't and I've also missed them during periods where I either didn't know of their music or wasn't paying attention. It's not a guarantee because they're not really that famous. There was a time where anyone I would have heard would be big enough where their fame would be reasonably concrete even if they're not super famous now it's all over the place. There are musicians I think who are pretty famous but they can't afford to tour in various places. Maybe they even have less subscribers than me sometimes. What is happening. But it's also just changes in the music industry over time. I think it's very difficult now in music especially.



^ and they're working with Rachel Goswell.

This is why people who live in the same country or area can be very atomised now though I guess because they don't even really share cultures anymore and the cultures they're in are often global.

There are different network bubbles and some involve more power and influence than others I would say regardless of the numbers. The numbers don't necessarily matter. I've come across channels with 10k subs where the people in it are clearly big players on a cultural impact level they're like part of Elon and Thiel's extended network and they're attatched and pushing certain agendas.

And there are people who have reasonable levels of influence who aren't famous at all so there's also that.

[Nyctophilia]

tiktok is such an awful app, it's almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse

No, no, no, you see on tiktok an algorithm feeds you misinformation. On Tumblr I feed myself misinformation from my charcuterie board of hand-selected unhinged mutuals.

None of that mass market junk. Only artisanal, small batch, sustainably cultivated, fair trade horseshit.

It really is like night and day. Well I don't use tiktok but I have a vague idea of it from stuff posted elsewhere etc and twitter is either worse or the same kind of thing so I can imagine regardless. I feel tiktok is a bit more surreal (I need to stop using that word,) whereas twitter (outside of specific bubbles or if you get lucky,) is just deeply unpleasant people fighting and a lot of far right stuff. Also a very tribal site. But everything is just fear and anger it's ultimately the emotional thing and personality traits that are always attacking you. I think it was really twitter that made me think 'oh no we have to be seperated into our own bubbles like in real life. We can't all be together.'

So in a way tiktok probably is more interesting I imagine. Because I do think there's more kooky spiritual and creative type stuff happening.

Twitter can be quite addictive but terrible like the heroine nicotine of social media. Like if someone mixed the two together. All the nothing of nicotine with all the addictiveness and destruction of heroine. Maybe even meth and there's a cocaine element to the site too maybe the ruthless capitalistic vibes and all the cryptobros who hang there. Whereas without using tiktok I feel it's more like it would be more speed mixed with lsd - and in that case that's a statement of the overall vibe. Definitely amphetamines.



And Tumblr is definitely the lsd of websites. I guess maybe weed because of that weed smoking girlfriends meme lol. They're all drugs though.



But outside of the mass dissociative element I think it's very cosy. People just have really idiosyncratic interests that they'll post about.

And there's something about twitter which has always made me think of an airport or shopping mall where as Tumblr is more like a cafe or something I guess. In spite of the fact it's a social media website. Maybe it's more like a market. Yeah like an outdoor market with a bunch of little shops around. Literally in a sense lol people are sometimes linking to their etsy stores.

There is annoying stuff happening on Tumblr too though just harder to stumble on it. It really is the bridge between the old and new internet.

Like imagine any of the reactions happening below on twitter. Maybe in a small bubble of small follower accounts but rarely. This is a massively popular tumblr post:

sorry i cant hang out i forgot how to mimic human like behaviour

I mean if you wanna just loom in the corner like some kinda creature that's cool, we just don't want you getting left out

Hang out anyway. You can be whatever exotic xenohuman you are without masking. Provided we can occasionally share atmospheric vibrations communicating trust and presence, I don't mind even if you just do your own thing in the space. Your presence, humanlike or otherwise is appreciated and enjoyed.

how's everyone doin' in the corner, you good (-_-)b ?

some days I do feel like a phyrexian archivist

Posts that hit harder as an alterbeing

My high [BEEP] thought they were talking about a wool loom. They be making blankets and such in the corner from scratch NOT by candle light. The corner has to be dark

I need to find me friends who would let me loom in the corner and occasionally join the conversation

I want to meet Orin's parents

They're probably as normal as April's parents. LOL

You assume Orin has human parents

In real life people like April and Orin generally don't have 'normal' parents or healthy family dynamics. I say this because I relate to them somewhat and so know my own family. Plus personality is genetic + environmental.

#voidpunk

lol I forgot about that.

Voidpunk is a subculture within the LGBT community, specifically among certain dehumanized or marginalized groups, who feel rejected from society's standards for humanity, and aim to reclaim their dehumanization. The embrace of one's non-human identity is at the center here, and there is a strong link to resistance against oppressors.

This isn't accurate (seems to be highly listed google result.) This is the actual defintion:

Voidpunk is a subculture for those who have been dehumanized to reclaim their dehumanization. Many are told that all humans experience romantic and/or sexual attraction, are binary cisgender, are neurotypical, are white etc. This subculture is for those who don't match that criteria of humanity and don't want to match it.

There's some overlap but it's not really part of it and definitely not the core part since the groups they emphasise are peripheral to the core of the LGBT+ community in the first place.

Alex Jones dehumanises people all the time because of his conspiratorial beliefs. But also to some extent everyone does in subtle ways all the time. He just takes it further with literally talking about aliens and all kinds of [BEEP] lol. He's probably mentally ill too (it's hard to say if he is or if he's just marketing to schizophrenic people.) This still goes hard though:



There's a weird pipeline between bigotry and psychosis that I don't think is probably that common or integral necessarily but you see it a lot online because pathology is very visible online. As is bigotry.

You see a lot of mild psychotic and dissociative stuff online in general I guess but it's a very fear driven kind of thing instead of being playful.

A lot of what he says sounds like people who have taken dmt too (or similar drugs):



Edit: Oh yeah I didn't watch this the whole way through lol. I've seen clips of him talking to Joe Rogan before but couldn't remember if he actually brought that up but he brings up hallcinogens in the video.

The 'elves' he's talking about are typically described as being neutral by people. I think the idea of that archetype being seen as evil is inherently tied to the Abrahamic religions. They demonise all related archetypes unfortunately.

I mean if you read some accounts:

Met what seemed like an entity to show me its 'machine'. The machine looked like an egg with a weird lantern on it, like those deep sea fish have. It made zipper noises. The entity was conveying child-like pride and wonder over its creation, but I can't exactly remember what that entity looked like. Just that it was there with me.

Well I got in contact with some elves/pixies/faeries/spirits (hard to say what they were exactly) in my 2nd ceremony. They seemed to be 2D light creatures with robotic body parts, some had vehicles for bodies. They were very friendly at first, they were making objects out of ideas/language/light and they wanted me to give them something. I didn?t know what they wanted and they started to get annoyed. Eventually, I understood they wanted me to show them what I know. So I gave them philosophical ideas that I had read but then they eventually wanted me to give them something original, one of my ideas and I had no ideas of my own or at least that?s what I had thought and communicated with them. They became angry and went inside my body and eventually came out with this object and told me ?this, this is your inner wisdom, your original work? They gave me back this object but took everything else.

I was very confused by the situation, I thought I was just mugged and had lost something really important.

I later understood how necessary this step was in my journey. I could no longer lean on the words, opinions, ideas of other people. There is infinitely more value in understanding than there is in memorizing other people?s work.

During my first Ayahuasca trip last night, I encountered something akin to the infamous "machine elves" at two distinct points. The first appearance was when the trip first really began and they were very confrontational and antagonistic. The visuals that came with them were a classic machine elf visual, with little entities that were shifting in form looking inside some sort of contraption pulling out folders, that were almost like the "files" of all the darkest and most ignored parts of my psyche. They gave me pointed and jestful criticism, making a total mockery of me and my ego.

Their second appearance was far more friendly, but also jestful. They were explaining to me that the universe was a perpetual energy system that will never stop, and that there is no heaven or hell. That instead I'll be repeatedly reborn to overcome adversity and learn lessons about existence until eventually I will integrate with the universe of pure love and light and happiness. They came across as jolly yet mischievous pranksters content on running the inner mechanisms of the universe like cosmic train conductors happily shoveling coal into the engine of existence perpetually and contently. They liked their job, and their glee in it showed. But they did have a mischievous side, as I saw in the beginning where they tried to shred my ego and point out all my flaws.

I've yet to try DMT but I'm going to in the future. I'm really curious and have been reading trip reports in all kinds of places. Something I found fascinating was the entities which people encountered often became less friendly as time went on. And become outright hostile when talking about God and Jesus. Now. I'm not really religious. And I'm not sure if these things aren't just inventions of the mind. But I'm curious if anyone has asked these machine elves whether they are in fact demons or asked about God and got a different, non-negative response.

I'm going to ask them this stuff should I encounter them

If true I don't blame them.

Yes 1000% they are demons/archons. They are meant to lead you away from Christ. Ask them what they think of 'Jesus Christ of Nazareth' and their true colors will come out

I don't believe they are, I've never really asked them about God or Jesus. They did seem to get aggressive when I asked if they are any correct religions to follow. What I got from it was to not focus so much on certain belief group, the ones who think they are right are actually wrong. Love is the only religion humans should follow. It was definitely a different interaction, I normally see Jesters instead of the elves. Jester's definitely treat you a bit more roughly but then help you laugh it off at the end of their message. These are my experiences though, it's different with for everyone yet similar at the same time.

The dmt jesters are such a strange phenomena. I can?t help but wonder what the hell those things are? they sure appear sentiment and rather intelligent.

Demons often were compared to jesters/clowns a long time ago. Infact, jesters/clowns are inspired by demons. The funny hairstyle of a clown, or the silly jester hat mimics the shape of a demon skull/horns. The silly big clown smile made with makeup mimicks the wide grin of the demon. Even the silly patterns on clown costumes, spots and stripes etc is inspired by the fractal nature of these entities people see on DMT. There is a reason many people find clowns creepy af

They don't like Christianity much but if you start telling them about the Greek/Roman or Egyptian Gods they'll get friendlier and may bestow gifts if you prove you are willing to delve deeper in connecting with these Gods.

What's the reason they like those more

Because they are demons and hate Jesus

Yes. The Egyptian gods are just demon worship in disguise. As is every other old world religion. They've duped the world since the start. And hate that the creator came to do away with their illusions through Jesus. It makes sense that they would get friendlier when speaking on Egyptian religion and meaner when Christianity is mentioned..

Lol.

I have no idea.

I had my second one and I met the DMT machine elves during part of my trip. There were multiple Figures but two of them stuck out to me most. One was feminine and the other was a masculine but young energy. If anyone?s met the elves. If you remember their names can you please comment them ? I want to run a mini social experiment

Side question - when you meet the entities in your DMT trips are they masculine or feminine?

I only met one in mine and she was feminine but she inferred there were others that were male or genderless; there was also an element of their gender not really mattering or meaning the same things as it does out here.

Both. The only time I tried it i heard two voices in sync with one another female and male. The female voice was dominant though

lol a bit like brassica prime =D



I like stuff like that a lot too:

I personally believe this is true. I can't speak for DMT, but I did a peyote ceremony with the Navajo in 2014. Just like McKenna says about DMT, i literally felt like I was pushed through a membrane of sorts into a rave like dimension. A machine elf greeted me singing and welcoming me exactly as people describe them. Everything felt right, so I thought in my head what's your name not knowing this thing could read my mind and it said "Baphomet". At first the phrase meant nothing to me, but a soon as I realized what was said I very quickly thought of Christ and was launched violently Into an infinite black ocean of some kind. I was drowning in a pitch black ocean with no sky above the surface?only unspeakable lengths of what looked like ropes with bugs crawling on them in the air. This was a devastating experience

Now I really want someone to try this but like think about Jesus/Satan fanfiction instead and also some other apocryphal stuff. I've never done drugs I don't know how much control people have lol.

Interdimensional marriage counselling =D

*gets booted into the black lake*

What! I heard you were looking for ideas.

They don?t like it when we get greedy for information we are not ready or, perhaps, destined for. They seem to shun me and call time whenever that happens. I've stopped trying to take, only receive.

But, you are gonna have such a wild experience first time, you won't remember yourself let alone a question

Darn. I have a long list of questions.

Everything is created through perception, asking another entity to influence your perception and beliefs can be seen as ignorant. You're basically asking them to place limits in front of you and you're showing that you already limit yourself. They would rather just ignore it, and they may get irritated or angry if you continue to push or force narrow views in their presence.

I think they might want to encourage creativity. When people do hallucinogens some research suggests it makes them more open (the personality trait,) but this works better for people who are already fairly open from what I remember... I don't think I can be bothered to dig that up now. I think it was also lsd I was reading about a few years ago.

I think this is probably true as well:

They are a projections. If you fear / hate you will see demons if you show courage and love you will see angel's.

I'm saying they but I believe this is psychological this is just more fun.

I've wondered if Jagex were inspired by Terence McKenna's writing before actually because of how they created their elves in Runescape:

Crystal singing is a method of shaping elven crystal, a substance given to the elves by the goddess Seren. The shaping can be undone with the Ritual of Reversion. After completing the quest The Eyes of Glouphrie, players are able to sing crystal into weapons, armour and tools by using the singing bowl in the Ithell Clan district in Prifddinas.

What they're doing is making objects with their voices, singing structures into existence. They offer things to you, saying "Look at this! Look at this!" and as your attention goes towards these objects you realise that what you're being shown is impossible. It's not simply intricate, beautiful and hard to manufacture, it's impossible to make these things. The nearest analogy would be the Faberg? eggs, but these things are like the toys that are scattered around the nursery inside a U.F.O., celestial toys, and the toys themselves appear to be somehow alive and can sing other objects into existence, so what's happening is this proliferation of elf gifts, which are moving around singing, and they are saying "Do what we are doing" and they are very insistent, and they say "Do it! Do it! Do it!" and you feel like a bubble inside your body beginning to move up toward your mouth, and when it comes out it isn't sound, it's vision. You discover that you can pump "stuff" out of your mouth by singing, and they're urging you to do this. They say "That's it! That's it! Keep doing it!". We're now at minute 4.5 [of the trip] and you speak in a kind of glossolalia. There is a spontaneous outpouring of syntax unaccompanied by what is normally called "meaning". After a minute or so of this the whole thing begins to collapse in on itself and they begin to physically move away from you. Usually their final shot is that they wave goodbye and say "Deja vu! Deja vu!".

Apparently he talked about syneasthesia too which is funny because I was just going to bring up Tori Amos:

She has described seeing music as structures of light since early childhood, an experience consistent with chromesthesia:

The song appears as light filament once I've cracked it. As long as I've been doing this, which is more than thirty-five years, I've never seen the same light creature in my life. Obviously similar chord progressions follow similar light patterns, but try to imagine the best kaleidoscope ever--after the initial excitement, you start to focus on each element's stunning original detail. For instance, the sound of the words with the sound of the chord progression combined with the rhythm manifests itself in a unique expression of the architecture of color-and-light. ... I started visiting this world when I was three, listening to a piece by Bela Bartok; I visited a configuration that day that wasn't on this earth. ... It was euphoric.[17]

Amos, the daughter of a Methodist minister, offended some religious circles with her "blasphemous" lyrics. She told Hollywood Report in 1992: "I've been in the alternative stations because they won't play my lyrics. The whole Bible-belt banned me for 'Crucify' because they thought I was being sacrilegious. They felt that it was detrimental material for their children and that it was blasphemous. So 'Crucify' was banned and 'Silent All These Years' with the 'anti-Christ'... I'd do better using four-letter words."

"Crucify" is about Tori Amos's struggle to overcome self-hatred, and by extension, to help any listeners overcome their own self-hatreds. Although often accused of being sacreligious, the song's message and metaphor are actually consistent with mainstream Christianity. Tori's father is a liberal Christian minister, so it's not too surprising that Tori picked up some skill in delivering a challenging sermon.

Tori explained how she created the song:

Bells started going off every time I wouldn?t stick up for myself. I accepted Quasimodo was a squatter in my cerebral area. A rhythmic pattern kept chasing me around. I dug out the drum machine and put the pattern down. I would leave that pattern on for hours while I just sat and argued with myself about stuff. The first music to get put to the pattern was the 'B' section, 'I've been looking for a saviour'? a door opened and the demons started to show up.

-Little Earthquakes songbook

Can see why it might annoy 'them.'

Also I just discovered this song:

I mean, her voice and range is excellent, and I like her music, but it is rather niche and nonsensical.

No again like with that film I don't think it's nonsensical (not really niche either lol.) edit: I mean the film Lost in New York about the moon goddess time travelling device. You know that inspired the music video which says 'I'm God' in the title as well lol:



Actually in this case you could just google some of the lyrics to understand some of the points. Beyond that it's obviously open to interpretation as with most lyrics you can read different things into it if the musician hasn't clarified. That's the whole point lol I mean.

[Chorus]
Building (Inanna)
Tumbling down (Inanna)
Didn't know our love was so small (Inanna)
Couldn't stand it all (Bring your son)
Mr. St. John just bring your son

Inanna is a Mesopotamian goddess of love, war etc.

I think a bunch of her lyrics and thinking probably laments the absense of goddess figures culturally. Also Pretty Hate Machine is most likely a reference to Trent Reznor but probably meant to have multiple meanings again and I think it's likely that the rest of the lyrics have multiple meanings too. Also there's a bunch of Christian imagery in this song and a bunch of her songs.

Caught a lite sneeze, dreamed a little dream
Made my own pretty hate machine
Boys on my left side, boys on my right side
Boys in the middle and you're not here
Boys in their dresses and you're not here

Here are some lyrics on another song on the same album:

Muhammad, my friend, it's time to tell the world
We both know it was a girl back in Bethlehem
And on that fateful day when she was crucified
She wore Shiseido Red and we drank tea by her side


So she's talked about this:

"I sat there and started to think, 'Alright, I've heard all this backwards and forwards from every angle, and fine, I'm into this love your neighbor as yourself, that's great, but where does all this fear come from about dancing the primitive dance, the concept of woman, their sensuality, their connection with all aspects of the self? I read a bit of mythology, with Isis, etcetera, and said, OK, where did all of this go? Where's the balance? Where's the female aspect of God? The fragmentation of the feminine is something that really started to perk my interest. That's what 'Muhammad My Friend' is about, trying to find the female part of God that's been circumcised." [The Shepherd Express - June 6, 1996]

Not very hidden.

It's something that irritates me about Christianity but I wouldn't see Inanna as being purely feminine personally. (That's a different song though and she didn't talk about the meaning behind that one afaik.) In fact to the extent that Aphrodite was based on her she was actually feminised later.

Early artistic and literary portrayals of Aphrodite are extremely similar to Inanna/Ishtar.[354][355] Aphrodite was also a warrior goddess;[354][351][359] the second-century AD Greek geographer Pausanias records that, in Sparta, Aphrodite was worshipped as Aphrodite Areia, which means "warlike".[360][361] He also mentions that Aphrodite's most ancient cult statues in Sparta and on Cythera showed her bearing arms.[362] Modern scholars note that Aphrodite's warrior-goddess aspects appear in the oldest strata of her worship[363] and see it as an indication of her Near Eastern origins.[363][359] Aphrodite also absorbed Ishtar's association with doves,[86][359] which were sacrificed to her alone.[359] The Greek word for "dove" was peristera,[86][87] which may be derived from the Semitic phrase peraḥ Istar, meaning "bird of Ishtar".[87] The myth of Aphrodite and Adonis is derived from the story of Inanna and Dumuzid.[357][358]

Aphrodite Areia (Ancient Greek: Ἀφροδίτη Ἀρεία) or "Aphrodite the Warlike" was a cult epithet of the Greek goddess Aphrodite, in which she was depicted in full armor like the war god Ares.[1] This representation was found in Sparta and Taras (modern Taranto). There were other, similarly martial interpretations of the goddess, such as at her Sanctuary at Kythira, where she was worshiped under the epithet Aphrodite Urania, who was also represented as being armed. The epithet "Areia", meaning "warlike", was applied to other gods in addition to Aphrodite, such as Athena, Zeus, and possibly Hermes.[1]

The association with warfare contradicts Aphrodite's more popularly known role as the goddess of desire, fertility, and beauty. In the Iliad, Aphrodite is portrayed as incompetent in battle, being wounded in the wrist by Diomedes under the guidance of Athena, and she is reminded of her role as a love goddess rather than a war goddess like Athena by Zeus.[2] It is possible, however, that this representation was deliberate to assert the Ionian interpretation of Aphrodite, which did not portray the goddess with warlike aspects, as the "correct" version.[3]

Maybe related symbolism:

Cronus castrated Uranus and threw his father's testicles into the sea. They caused the sea to foam and out of that white foam rose Aphrodite

Although Inanna/Istar is the goddess par excellence, the beautiful maiden full of sex-appeal, she is also depicted as an androgyne, having masculine features, e.g., a beard. In the Old Babylonian sources, Istar was given "masculinity" (nam-gurus) by her father An.

19-31Inana was entrusted by Enlil and Ninlil with the capacity to gladden the heart of those who revere her in their established residences, but not to soothe the mood of those who do not revere her in their well-built houses; to turn a man into a woman and a woman into a man, to change one into the other, to make young women dress as men on their right side, to make young men dress as women on their left side, to put spindles into the hands of men ......, and to give weapons to the women; to see that women amuse themselves by using children's language, to see that children amuse themselves by using women's language, to ...... skill, to ....... They built a palace, her house of ladyship, for the mistress of An, and invested it with fearsome radiance. They made it into the neck-stock of all the foreign countries, and imbued it with awe-inspiring, terrifying splendour.

I'm kind of biased and not really a fan of purely masculine or feminine characters in general (yeah that's not true depending on interpretation. Eg: I like Ron Swanson as a character I just find figures like Ares and Zeus and Khorne and Yahweh etc boring. Khorne is more fun I guess because he's not considered the one true God (tm) and Slaanesh and several other characters get to [BEEP] with him so he's kind of needed for the polarity. There are way less purely feminine characters around but I probably care less. Unsurprisingly I don't connect with mother goddesses though,) but I think I particuarly dislike Aphrodite for this reason - the castration element (though technically it's not her fault,) And also for larping purposes because at one point I had the usename Persephone before I really knew anything about Persephone or anything I'm writing about in this post I just thought it was an edgy username and I liked some art work I'd found around the time. They were in a love triangle with Adonis lol.

I think a lot of people ask about where the female aspect of the Abrahamic God is. Christianity has Mary and compared to most religions, especially older religions, this is actually quite feminine. But what Christianity does is it emphasises gender roles, radical seperation of gendered traits, and patriarchy and that isn't particuarly comfortable for a lot of people. It's definitely not my cup of tea but I can tell it appeals to people who enjoy those things.

I also don't love that if I search Isis the Islamist group comes up as basically every result unless you specify you're talking about the Egyptian goddess.

[Nyctophilia]

Yes 1000% they are demons/archons. They are meant to lead you away from Christ. Ask them what they think of 'Jesus Christ of Nazareth' and their true colors will come out

They don't like Christianity much but if you start telling them about the Greek/Roman or Egyptian Gods they'll get friendlier and may bestow gifts if you prove you are willing to delve deeper in connecting with these Gods.

Now I really want someone to try this but like think about Jesus/Satan fanfiction instead and also some other apocryphal stuff. I've never done drugs I don't know how much control people have lol.

Interdimensional marriage counselling =D

*gets booted into the black lake*

What! I heard you were looking for ideas.

What they were saying about the 'machine elves' being archons. The archons come from Gnosticism and are the builders of the physical universe:

According to a Gnostic text called the Reality of the Rulers, the archons "have bodies that are both female and male, and faces that are the faces of beasts."[2] Thus, they're not truly male nor female, nor human nor animal. The ancients found this kind of boundary-crossing to be deeply threatening, and this description of the archons implied that they were forces of chaos, so "mixed up" as to be "the farthest that a created being could be from God."[3]

Peter Gabriel is kind of chanelling this with the dress + fox mask lol. Not on purpose afaik:



Some suggestion this was influenced by Egyptian Gods:

The imagery of Zoe breathing a fiery angel and sending Yaldabaoth to Tartarus may have been inspired by Egyptian coffin texts, such as Spell 575 and 937.[86] The language Norea uses when speaking to the archons also recalls magic spells from Egyptian sources.[87] Adam's words to Eve are reminiscent of aretologies around Isis.[88][89] The archons have animal heads, similar to Egyptian deities.[15]

You get the dehumanisation and then you get the 'this is evil' thing. Obviously for the most part this only explains bigotry that stems from common theology though and tbh I think it's likely that the theology is used to justify the bigotry in many cases too.

In spite of all this the Gnostic creator Goddess Barbelo is also described in a similarly androgynous way:

Barbelo (Greek: Βαρβηλώ)[1] refers to the first emanation of God in several forms of Gnostic cosmogony. Barbelo is often depicted as a supreme female principle, the single passive antecedent of creation in its manifold. This figure is also variously referred to as 'Mother-Father' (hinting at her apparent androgyny), 'The Triple Androgynous Name', or 'Eternal Aeon'. So prominent was her place amongst some Gnostics that some schools were designated as Barbeliotae, Barbelo worshippers or Barbelo gnostics.

Part of the story involves 'Sophia' falling and inventing the demiurge and archons:

In various Gnostic Christian myths, Sophia was the catalyst who gave rise to creation and the material realm. Sophia, the timeless being, or Aeon, who existed in the realm of perfection (Pleroma) as the archetype of Wisdom, felt inclined to manifest a creation of her own. But because she lacked the proper toolset or polarity, her creation was imperfect, and this imperfection caused an eruption in the Pleroma.

Sophia created Yaldabaoth (aka Saklas, Samael), an ignorant being hell-bent on crafting his own collection of inferior beings. This gave rise to the creation of the material realm, along with several (7, 12, or 365) princes (archons) who would subsequently rule this new realm. These ruling archons had heads of animals, and were often associated with fallen angels.

It's a bit of a weird belief system. It adopted the same idea of good and evil but decided to make Yahweh the bad guy instead but some instead claimed the demiurge was just ignorant:

In Gnosticism, the biblical serpent in the Garden of Eden was praised and thanked for bringing knowledge (gnosis) to Adam and Eve and thereby freeing them from the malevolent Demiurge's control.[38] Gnostic Christian doctrines rely on a dualistic cosmology that implies the eternal conflict between good and evil, and a conception of the serpent as the liberating savior and bestower of knowledge to humankind opposed to the Demiurge or creator god, identified with the Yahweh from the Hebrew Bible.[38][35]

However, not all Gnostic movements regarded the creator of the material universe as inherently evil or malevolent.[39][40] For instance, Valentinians believed that the Demiurge is merely an ignorant and incompetent creator, trying to fashion the world as well as he can, but lacking the proper power to maintain its goodness.[39][40] They were regarded as heretics by the proto-orthodox Early Church Fathers.[38][35][41]

This is why I was joking about 'interdimensional marriage counselling' btw:

In Gnosticism, Sophia is a feminine figure, analogous to the human soul but also simultaneously one of the feminine aspects of God. Gnostics held that she was the syzygy, or female twin, of Jesus, i.e. the Bride of Christ, and the Holy Spirit of the Trinity.

I noticed a few years ago there were some overlaps between Sophia and Lucifer.

Also just found some guy ranting about an instagram post where someone seems to have fused gnosticism with Christianity:

https://thesacredfaith.co.uk/home/pe...nd-sophia.html

I saw a post on my Instagram feed the other day that just got me a little riled up. I'll admit it, I can be a little short-tempered at times, especially around the subject of Jesus and seeing him/the Christian faith misrepresented to such a degree that it could mislead others down the wrong path. I don't normally write responses to things like this, but I felt this one deserved it, mainly just to add some clarity to a somewhat confusing topic, and so there's a place I (or you, if you fancy sharing my posts!) can point people to if this type of ideology is going to spread.

A lot of the comments under that post seemed to find it quite affirming in some ways, others were confused as they'd never heard this before (and rightly so) but were keen to look into it. There were also a lot of references to a single author, and book, called, She Who Is, by Elizabeth A. Johnson, where this idea seemed to have originated in some form. In fact, the majority of the comments were wanting to explore this idea in more depth. So, I think maybe there's something to be said there for the lack of female representation in the Church if it garnered this type of response, but I also thought if people are this taken by the idea, I wanted to write something to offer some Biblical and historical views on this "Sophia", as she isn't a new concept at all. The caption under the Instagram post sounds nice, but it's ever so slightly off-kilter that it misrepresents everything.

No, no. I for one support Jesus's new lesbian mums.

Jesus had two moms.
Their names are
Mary and Sophia.
You've heard about Mary, but do you know about Sophia?
Sophia is the Greek word for God's Wisdom.
And God's Wisdom is a Woman. Her name is Sophia.
Sophia was there at the beginning of creation. She birthed the world into existence.
Deuteronomy 32 says that God gave birth to the people. That was Sophia.
Christians began to associate Sophia with the Holy Spirit. The Spirit is Sophia. She is the divine feminine who is the Third Person of the Trinity.
Sophia is our divine Mother.
God is She who loves you.

Christians began to associate Sophia with the Holy Spirit. The Spirit is Sophia. She is the divine feminine who is the Third Person of the Trinity.

Here the 'insta-theology' comes to a head, and triumphantly announces Sophia?s true identity, the Holy Spirit! But is this accurate, though? Are Sophia and the Holy Spirit one and the same? Did Christians associate the two? Well? yes. Sort of. But only two in antiquity that I could find, and, interestingly, they both wrote around the same time period of AD 180: Theophilus and Irenaeus. Maybe more modern Christians relate Sophia with the Holy Spirit, but that would be a drastic break from the historical understanding, and would make for a complicated Christology when examining the ?Wisdom? Scriptures closer.

Other than those two previously mentioned, the interpretation and understanding was pretty unanimous for the first few centuries: "Sophia" is Jesus.

I hope you can see now that this isn't a novel idea, nor a modern feminist conception (though it has undoubtedly been picked up by feminists in more recent times). The idea that Jesus, the Word of God, is Sophia the Wisdom of God, is ancient. The connections are throughout the New Testament if we are looking carefully.

It's interesting to consider why people see these similar archetypes on hallucinogenic drugs - there's also the snakes and cats etc of course that often pop up and other reptiles and dragons. I think the reptile thing is kind of very imprinted in Human psychology why cats are so important I don't know. Toxoplasmosis maybe lol:

What's up with cats?

They know

They literally do be knowing

'there's also snakes and cats etc' Or why not both:

I had a weird experience about cats on DMT. I blasted off and found myself in a weird jungle, made up of vertical tentacles. All undulating and wavy. This long, completely white snake type creature, with no features, was slithering through it. I remember thinking how adapted it was to its environment, and as soon as I thought that I thought it was somehow feline. It came right up to me, reared its featureless head and spoke into my thoughts. It asked me curiously, ?what are you?? And I could almost feel the mrrrr sound a cat would make, like a quizzical chirp?

It was the weirdest thing, it was like some weird cat snake entity.

I'm assuming some amount of the overlap in experiences are either because some of these religions were inspired by people on hallucinogens in the first place in ancient cultures (which is quite likely,) or simply influenced by stories of other people talking about the same thing before doing these drugs or some combination of both. Also very curious about what people in cultures untouched by the Abrahamic religions would see (there aren't many though now unfortunately.) But Humans tend to think in similar ways so there's always going to be similar stuff happening I imagine.

"Encounters are really common," he tells IFLScience, adding that "you get them more often than not with a high dose of DMT." Regarding the nature of these entities, Luke explains that "there is a wide degree of diversity but there are also some recurrent themes that tend to pop up more than would seem purely random. Among the most common are 'little people', be they elves, dwarves or pixies."

That's not to say that everyone gets to meet these diminutive creatures when they smoke the drug. Also included in the cast of characters summoned by DMT are "giant praying mantises" that are typically experienced "leaning over you and doing some weird operation on your brain"

"The praying mantises are nearly always devoid of any emotion, and sometimes people feel like they're being farmed for their emotions by them," says Luke.

Lol I have managed to find a reddit post:

Has anyone else encountered a Praying Mantis type entity? Specifically doing surgery?

During one of my trips I saw a Praying Mantis doing surgery on me. I was wondering if anyone else has experiences with Praying Mantises, surgery, or both.

I had one eat my legs once. When I started to get upset he looked up at me and "told me" (in the weird non verbal sort of way they always communicate with me) that I should relax, legs were useless here anyway. And that seemed pretty legit. So I let him go about his business

Yes? But not specifically a mantis. It had a praying mantis body shape but like an anteater face? And I was on some kind of space station thing strapped down and he was jabbing we with some machine arm thing (implants? Surgery? Something medical..). Didn't scare me though, actually felt he was helping somehow.

Forgot to mention, the only time I had a surgery like experience, my body, which I could see in the realm, was laying down. The huge Mantis above me took "hand" or whatever you would call it and stabbed me in the stomach. I could see black liquid coming from me and filling up the Mantis arm.... I asked in my thoughts what was happening, nervous... I was made aware/to feel that they were just sucking the toxins/bad from me

This experience shook me to my core for days lol

I never had the praying mantis being do "surgery" on me. But I've encountered other sorts of multidimensional beings doing surgery on me or just looking over me as I'm laying down.

There seems to be an entire subreddit devoted to the mantis experiences lol:

A place to share experiences and discuss descriptions of encounters with mantis beings through meditation, astral projection, psychedelics, dreams, abductions and more.

Woman taken into a craft, questioned by a Mantid to "tell me what you know" she was pierced in her spine with a needle, ostensibly to get the requested information

^ Some seem to be looking for information as well like the machine elves although I guess they're more likely to want to show people stuff as well. I like how the responses to this are 'that's not how mantids work'

They don't need to ask they can read your mind

I agree. Maybe she is wrong on that detail, or maybe her esoteric studies gave her some resistance to the Mantids influence. Who knows

A bunch of people have described some kind of Mars-like homeworld that the mantid's appear on and that they're very logical. It seems like a fushion between aliens and insects so pretty common ideas that most people would have in mind. But also clicking sounds like dolphins:

The Dolphin sound with clicking is the exact wording I used to describe their sounds, as well. Plus the telepathy.

Tumblr loves all these things I think (elves, cats, reptiles, mantises, aliens etc.) I guess I wasn't joking when I said it was the lsd of websites. (Although most of these people discussing this are talking about dmt, and ayahuasca,)

"male mantises are such bimbos I saw this guy miss a bee, then very confidently take a bite of the goldenrod buds he caught instead" - a Tumblr post I just found.

[Nyctophilia]

Lol speaking of #voidpunk again for the third time now in a couple of days (and this has nothing to do with the title of this video they talk about several things.)

"So there are like a 100 more tweets that she writes about Tala."

Uh they bring up the Tala freak out (about 1 hour 4 minutes into the video,) that happened with Hitchin library. That was so insane. The idea that some small town that's like 7 miles away would become globally relevant and for this reason is more insane. Just imagine thinking about the idea of this happening 20 years ago.

So Maya Forstater and a bunch of people just freaked out because they changed their mascot to an alien with gender neutral pronouns. And she was like 'I don't buy the sneering argument that this is not important.' No honestly it really isn't. You can talk about whatever online but to insist that's important is a bit much. It's a cartoon alien mascot for a library. No young kid is going to even notice their use of gender neutral pronouns for an alien. I was always using gender neutral pronouns for everyone without even thinking about it for years before it became controversial lol.

The library then responded to her complaints by saying Tala wasn't trans they are an alien lol but she continued on.

Some questions. Please answer
- Is Tala non-binary?
- Why do you tell parents and children to call it "they"?
- Is it acceptable to call Tala "it"?
- It is not explained on the press release that Tala is an alien. Is there a separate briefing on the character for library staff?

Honestly at this point I would have just been like "yeah the cartoon alien is non-binary now. Everytime you whine about nonsense Tala gains an extra gender. Tala is absorbing all the genders and pronouns in the universe."

The parent who messaged me told me she was told "Tala is non-binary" and "uses they/them pronouns"

These are true things. Tala is a storytelling alien from outer space, so neither male nor female.

Are you trying to confuse the public? Why would an alien be neither male or female? They\them pronouns are specific of a certain terrestrial ideology I'm sure aliens don't know anything about.

It's been a common science fiction trope for a long time.

Yes, indeed the people in it are androgynous, but that doesn't mean that I'm predicting that in a millennium or so we will all be androgynous, or announcing that I think we damned well ought to be androgynous. I'm merely observing, in the peculiar, devious, and thought-experimental manner proper to science fiction, that if you look at us at certain odd times of day in certain weathers, we already are. I am not predicting, or prescribing. I am describing. I am describing certain aspects of psychological reality in the novelist's way, which is by inventing elaborately circumstantial lies."

Speaking of that Ursula K. Le Guin had some difficulty with The Left Hand of Darkness (1969) and regrets using male pronouns for the ambisexual characters as it's been pointed out that this, along with mostly conforming to masculine stereotypes, made most people read the characters as male:

https://theanarchistlibrary.org/libr...ecessary-redux

I regret even more certain timidities or ineptnesses I showed in following up the psychic implications of Gethenian physiology. Just for example, I wish I had known Jung?s work when I wrote the book: so that I could have decided whether a Gethenian had no animus or anima, or both, or an animum?. [For another example (and Jung wouldn?t have helped with this, more likely hindered) I quite unnecessarily locked the Gethenians into heterosexuality. It is a naively pragmatic view of sex that insists that sexual partners must be of opposite sex! In any kemmerhouse homosexual practice would, of course, be possible and acceptable and welcomed--but I never thought to explore this option; and the omission, alas, implies that sexuality is heterosexuality. I regret this very much.] But the central failure in this area comes up in the frequent criticism I receive, that the Gethenians seem like men, instead of menwomen.

This rises in part from the choice of pronoun. I call Gethenians "he" because I utterly refuse to mangle English by inventing a pronoun for "he/she." [This "utter refusal" of 1968 restated in 1976 collapsed, utterly, within a couple of years more. I still dislike invented pronouns, but I now dislike them less than the so-called generic pronoun he/him/his, which does in fact exclude women from discourse; and which was an invention of male grammarians, for until the sixteenth century the English generic singular pronoun was they/them/their, as it still is in English and American colloquial speech. It should be restored to the written language, and let the pedants and pundits squeak and gibber in the streets. In a screenplay of The Left Hand of Darkness written in 1985, I referred to Gethenians not pregnant or in kemmer by the invented pronouns a/un/a's, modeled on a British dialect. These would drive the reader mad in print, I suppose; but I have read parts of the book aloud using them, and the audience was perfectly happy, except that they pointed out that the subject pronoun, "a" pronounced "uh" [ǝ], sounds too much like "I" said with a Southern accent.] "He" is the generic pronoun, damn it, in English. (I envy the Japanese, who, I am told, do have a he/she pronoun.) But I do not consider this really very important. [I now consider it very important.] The pronouns wouldn?t matter at all if I had been cleverer at showing the "female" component of the Gethenian characters in action. [If I had realized how the pronouns I used shaped, directed, controlled my own thinking, I might have been "cleverer."] Unfortunately, the plot and structure that arose as I worked the book out cast the Gethenian protagonist, Estraven, almost exclusively in roles that we are culturally conditioned to perceive as "male"--a prime minister (it takes more than even Golda Meir and Indira Gandhi to break a stereotype), a political schemer, a fugitive, a prison-breaker, a sledge-hauler?. I think I did this because I was privately delighted at watching, not a man, but a manwoman, do all these things, and do them with considerable skill and flair. But, for the reader, I left out too much. One does not see Estraven as a mother, with his children [strike "his"], in any role that we automatically perceive as "female": and therefore, we tend to see him as a man [place "him" in quotation marks, please]. This is a real flaw in the book, and I can only be very grateful to those readers, men and women, whose willingness to participate in the experiment led them to fill in that omission with the work of their own imagination, and to see Estraven as I saw him [read: as I did], as man and woman, familiar and different, alien and utterly human.

Oh no!

So where does this infant (who "takes they/them pronouns" parents are told) come from? Where are its parents? Did it hatch from an egg or was it born from a mama? Who looks after its interests?

I feel like this is racist against my people (the machine elves obviously.)

"I talk about the gods, I am an atheist. But I am an artist too, and therefore a liar. Distrust everything I say. I am telling the truth. The only truth I can understand or express is, logically defined, a lie. Psychologically defined, a symbol. Aesthetically defined, a metaphor."

It has to be up there for most ridiculous discourse of 2022 tbh.

[Nyctophilia]

I'm reading that guy's site again. I don't like this but it's so difficult to stumble on people who come across as intelligent and have that kind of push towards femininity.

But all the issues that were there before are still there. I'm not that into his current ideal aesthetic either.

I thought about just inventing someone like writing a character lol.. I mean like some fictional character writing a blog. It's not the same though. Unless I can enter a mind state where it feels like I'm not there and I'm not here (so flow state,) which is great (and necessary,) but rare for me to achieve. Then also maybe after a while I'll forget what I wrote and can read it as though someone else wrote it. But that's important otherwise it's too predictable. I seem to go through phases with being able to have more detailed romantic daydreams too (but even then it's like telling a story and I don't self insert,) and haven't used my own fantasies for sexual purposes in many years now.

So he's now in Europe travelling and not a virgin anymore because he paid for an escort. The way he writes about this is also a little sad since he's thinking about going to see her again and basically paid for a romantic experience.

I am curious if he's going to end up idealising and hung up on her because a lot of what he writes (in general,) suggests he might do that...

my favorite parts were the more date-y girlfriend-y romantic aspects For a night I had a girlfriend, and honestly that felt really good, more so than I expected.

I don't think I could enjoy that. I could see a universe where I pay to do sexual/fetish stuff but the emotional/attatchment aspect would be dangerous for me.

At that point like I say, I'd rather just invent someone.

And honestly:

I'm even missing her already, not a week later, and am already (as I suspected I might like to do - and as she even suggested herself!) floating the idea of seeing her again

It will be interesting to see if he's going to get attached. And jesus that cost him a lot for a single night. At insane amount of dollars a night (thousands.) I'm sure she does want to see him again.

Tbh the virgin thing also gave him more of a tragic/romantic appeal. Like the quest for his idealised romantic partner. Although it was already ruined I guess by all the cynical + narcissistic things he often writes alongside the romantic.

So he's blond now too. And he's kind of idealising this tan blond surfer ideal. He didn't like his darker hair because he thinks it makes him look gloomy and this seems more fun and reminds him of childhood and he was happier when he was blond as a child.

I'll be young, fit, happy, and beautiful again...

He thinks people might treat him better with this hair colour too.

The surfer-girl and surfer-boy image calls to me...

develop my body and my physique so I'm the hottest person on the beach; I've got real potential.

Lol this just reminds me of the Killers song:



It's not confidential, I've got potential

This song also fits for other reasons lol.

With how grueling and boring I find training as well as the timeline involved I'm going to have to use steroids to get there, but so what?

Could the surfer girl image call to you a bit louder?

That all has led me to be hesitant about building out a real wardrobe, in particular because I had little idea what sort of a look I wanted to cultivate for this new chapter in my life. But now, thanks to the power of Facetune, I have much more of an idea, and it's all really quite fascinating: blonde me with the tan skin and the exotic green eyes looks really good in metallic colors and pinks. Sparkly, sequin-filled outfits in pink, gold, silver, blonde, and copper look amazing on me.

Thanks (that was literally the next paragraph lol.)

I wonder again for the 5654434556 time why my brain is like this.

Lol he edited some classic painting of a woman to have platinum blond hair.

Who is this guy? I feel like this is some kind of character he's designed as some incredibly weird niche PUA technique.

"How to pick up because I refuse to use the word fujoshi in the generalised way everyone does - non-binary people and women who want dicks and like feminine guys and like homoromantic shipping stuff with no life through the internet by pretending to feminise yourself" or something.

It's not like I've never come across feminine guys online but something about it feels performative and like he's selling himself even though it's just a blog.

The only thing stopping me from believing that (besides the fact no one would ever want to appeal to such a demographic lol and cetainly wouldn't put in effort to do so,) is there are too many visible red flags and things no one trying would do or its not a great technique. But he is trying in general I guess. He wrote that post about hoping he'd find attract someone through twitter....

So he goes into excruciating detail about his appearance and talking about his long blond hair. It's actually more than ever before I think and more feminine details so I guess this is a natural progression but it's weird because I was saying before about wanting him to do that.

Interestingly, the more ordinary, common, or, dare I say it, boring clothes look awful on me, [...] Combined with the exotic eyes, the tan skin, and the long platinum blonde waves with curls and bangs, it seems all that really flatters me is a look that just oozes Hollywood.

Tan, blonde, and fun me is so enticing [...] I've fallen in love

captivated not for some fictional character, not for someone I know, but for myself.

He's really living up to that wikipedia article I was reading on assortative mating:

Males prefer female faces that resemble their own when provided images of three women, with one image modified to resemble their own. However, the same result does not apply to females selecting male faces

(Although of course he's transparently AGP as well.)

He does write about himself like a fictional character:

the long wavy hair like liquid sunshine.

He also went into intense detail about his ancestry when describing his appearance.

Now he's edited a photo of a girl (I'm not posting that obviously this is weird enough,) with the aesthetic he's going for with a shimmery pink top (or I guess this is female/airbrush him? Yeah it's a photo of him that's like genderswapped and edited etc.) The top looks better than I was imagining. It's kind of metalic 'rose' I guess? Maybe not exactly but about that colour. I was thinking he meant a different shade of pink potentially. I mean when you're talking about sparkly/glittery stuff it can get tacky very easily. But I do find it attractive moreso in green obviously lol:





He says tan but honestly this photo isn't what I'd describe as tan. Guess that explains the twitter avatar though. Looks a bit like Scarlett Johansson or someone. You know the Hollywood thing like he said. It doesn't work well for me romantically. Or maybe it's the combination with his personality type I dunno.

I'm going to pretend he looks like that photo from twitter he said he liked before instead lol similar hair but different shade + different aesthetic:



He's never really acknowledging what he's doing or examining it when talking about it. Besides that one time he pointed out he was self aware and started talking about Jung. He just starts talking about girl!him with female pronouns. I wonder if it will escalate more over time?

She might have come from Tel Aviv, or a paradisaical garden of ancient Persia, but she'll find herself perfectly at home on the beaches of southern California...

OK see I know it's not a technique because he's talking about how he wants his future daughter to look like him again. Stop projecting on your future daughter man.

I really need to figure out how to find other people who write feminisation-y stuff online like this...

It's the yearning thing I think that's appealing. Coupled with feminine stuff but I want the universe to send me to someone who is more humble and talks about cute stuff more. Less competitive too maybe. Isn't driven by being the most attractive person on the beach. I understand wanting to be attractive but like:



Has longer maybe wavy hair (not platinum blond probably.) Less Hollywood. Still intelligent (it's not that important I just like people who have extensive vocabularies,) and talks about art, music etc. Doesn't want to turn their future daughter into a mini me of their ideal self...



You're so rich, bet you bought yourself a diamond chain
To look real cool while you're telling all your friends it's fake
But you know it's lies
Another [BEEP] from the Upper West Side
Credit cards cutting all of your lines, yeah

You're so cute, bet you really wanna be a star
To feel like gold when you're dancing on broken hearts
And you know it's true
You're no good 'til they're looking at you
Bad front, I can see right through, yeah

I can't stop judging everything you do
But I can't get enough of you

I don't know video is fine but I feel like there's an untapped market here.

Now time to link every song I know about Hollywood.



She is a Polish girl in America
Tall, tan, hot blonde called Anya
I asked her 'Why would you wanna be a Hollywood wife?'

[Nyctophilia]

I side eye people who have a issue with 'stereotypical gay characters' because I know most of the time they just have a problem with feminine men. It's just a way to morally justify their disgust and/or contempt for flamboyant people.



lol the image in the video seperating LGB and TQIA+ you do realise some people are part of both those groups right? And they've gone with a conventionally masculine gay guy on one side and then someone more flamboyant on the other. Pretty sure you missed several hundred archetypes of people there but OK.

And yeah you can tell by the types of people they focus on it's always people who are extroverted, feminine and a bit quirky:

Autistic nonbinary TikTokers. Loud, flamboyant gay men. The twink who filmed himself having seGGS in the Senate hearing room. Are gay rights being eroded across the country because some of us are... annoying?

I don't even know the people they complain about all the time. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't know them that's the funny thing. Like the person in this thumbnail I've only come across them in the context of people complaining. Same with Dylan Mulvaney.

As for cringe content in general that's really telling. If the point was just 'non-binary people and neo pronouns don't exist' basically no one would watch it at this point so they spend time selecting people who are again very atypical looking and stand out in a big way so they can make these thumbnails that attract conservative attention/outrage.

I know the details are secondary to the same old [BEEP] that people always have done which is to target people who stand out. I saw some conservatives on twitter post a tiktok clip of some teenager. They weren't talking about gender or sexuality they just had a tiktok where they looked very basic with a hoody and then they pushed some my little pony doll into the screen and then their appearence changed so they looked very colourful kind of inspired by Japanese street fashion like decora I think. All the comments were negative and acting like the sky was falling in and like 'what the [BEEP] is this?' A couple of people in a sea of hundreds of negative outrage comments were like 'they're creative' lol as an answer to the question. Which is pretty accurate and what conservatives hate.

Unlike a lot of grifters Arielle Scarcella actually used to make educational content that was useful and then just pivoted to this constant 'wow look at these wacky people' thing because YouTube started demonetising all sexual content or stuff related to that. Which is pretty bleak really.

I got suggested a short from her recently actually where she was complaining about how on sapphic dating sites most people there are either poly or non-binary or otherwise use pronouns. Basically a list of complaints about these things that people put in their bio I think she complained about political stuff too because I guess she can't find anyone. Kind of glad she seems terrible. Arielle wants you to know she is the only 'normal' lesbian.

She and her audience also seem to have a problem with witches and plant aesthetics etc which are attractive so she can [BEEP] off lol.

I'd take a million "annoying gays" over one "pick-me gay"

Blaire White used to be like that too when she was dressing like Jeffree Star before she transistioned (though the persona was and is more Regina George than bubbly I guess.) Both her and Jeffree Star are just trying to appeal to conservatives as 'a good femme' and both are super catty (this is why pretty much everyone Jeffree has ever been friends with has ditched him or he's fallen out with them.)

It's the lying with Jeffree though. He just contradicts stuff he said years ago (and not that many years ago,) to appeal to conservatives and grift. At least Blaire White is publicly consistent since her channel blew up (and she's sufficiently wiped old clips of her if they exist.)



I think they want everyone to have this personality 'miserable':



He misunderstands the problem though. It's not because they date men if anything if they're trying to date men in the gay community they have to 'tone that down' as a general rule. Lesbian women and straight men tend to be less extroverted and flamboyant.



And straight guys often hate straight women who act that way too but then later complain about why women act or especially dress 'like lesbians' LOL. It's very ironic.





He must know this on some level lol.





I'm kind of doing that in my previous post except that guy actually is a narcissist and isn't actually really a cute person most of the time. Also I actually am attracted to guys who 'look like lesbians' lol.



Again I didn't make this it's just convenient.

Not exclusively I kind of find Paris Hilton and Alexis Rose attractive sometimes (especially Alexis.)





It's her eyebrows I think.

I also think it's funny how she says David:



They are not men. I didn't switch there. Tbf the guys aren't women either. My brain is mildly gender blind in a literal sense.

[Nyctophilia]

Very manipulative. Lying to women saying that he'll have a kid with them later and pressuring them into getting abortions in the short term.

Imagine bragging about conning women into having abortions...yet claiming the importance of marriage and nuclear families? Absolutely vile behaviour. How anyone can justify those actions is beyond me.

Clearly full of shit.

He deserves to get saddled with child support but I would never wish a child to have him as a father so as much as I want him to go bankrupt ideally he'll never reproduce.

Also how has this happened to him repeatedly? Like he's having sex with so many women allegedly that he keeps having to pressure women into getting abortions + lying to them. If you want to keep having sex without kids use a condom and then if you don't want to do that get a vasectomy. They are reversible there's a risk of infertility after that but believe me it will be no loss if you can't have kids.

These guys really are taking [BEEP] boy to a whole new level.

At this point you guys are our free marketing team. Almost 40 videos now. We appreciate you guys helping us grow.

I hope every woman realises that they should never have sex with you. Thankfully they're as unintelligent as they are psychopathic.

Right, I've always wore protection out of respect of not putting someone through that despite my "sacrifice" till I met my wife. This is literally horrible... Vile [BEEP] human being. My generation is so stupidly lost.

It's not generational these kind of pricks have been around forever they just have massive platforms now on social media.

I remember when Black women got mad when F&F said on air that they don't date black women.
Instead of getting angry ladies, you should've thrown a party. These guys did you a huge favor.

This is a huge win for black women and other women shouldn't have sex with them either.

I feel like they are both basically psychopaths.

Book written by fresh and fit idiot, mostly 5 star ratings and men claiming the book changed their life. Is this really the state we're in? Reading stuff like this on a daily basis is really making me question any desire for a relationship with men. Seems to just be getting worse.

"Why Women Deserve Less" opens every man's eyes to the realities of the modern dating world so you don't waste your lives like so many generations of men before us.

Lol because he knows sociosexually restricted men won't compete with him for casual sex so he devotes a strange amount of time to trying to disuade them from having long term relationships how convinient. Well I don't know if he knows that consciously or if he's just an automaton.

What I think is happening - and this is just conjecture - is that as part of their psychopathic reproductive stategy they pretend to be interested in promoting stable relationships and conservative norms but what they actually want to do is put people off having long term relationships so they can have a larger dating pool - after all they transparently continue to have tons of casual sex or at least lie about having tons of casual sex to get $$$. It won't work since most women will choose to remain single or date other women but it kind of fucks things up for insecure men who want heterosexual relationships maybe. I feel like most people following them are probably psychopaths too though. Someone should eventually do some research on that I suppose. Like is it just psychopaths all the way down.

Instead of addressing the fact that it's okay for men to get therapy and talk about their emotions, Myron focuses on bringing women down and encourages men to be violent and to treat women as objects. Instead of encouraging teamwork and partnership between men and women, Myron degrades women and advises men that women must "submit" to them like they are some sort of dog. This is the type of attitude that keeps men single and undesirable . Myron had a great opportunity to attack the real issue which is OTHER men; MEN decided that relationships and marriage is ONLY transactional. Now that women make their own money and want emotional intelligence in a relationship, men are now starting to see the problem that they themselves started to begin with. Women deserve to have their own voice and if women want to stay single with no kids then that is fine. Procreating Is such a Neanderthal way of thinking about the world. We are past that and are only getting more intelligent as human beings; our soul purpose on this earth is NOT to procreate. If you want kids that is perfectly fine, if you don't want kids that is fine too. We are not lions and monkeys to be thinking that way; we have a prefrontal cortex that distinguishes us from actual animals. You as a man have the power to become a better person and to be compassionate , sympathetic, understanding. However if you decide to continue this misogynistic way of thinking then expect to be single for the rest of your life.

This seems hopelessly naive and back to front.

I don't think the author of this book has the ability to become a better person. Talking about his emotions won't help either. You should just highlight that he is a psychopath and will do absolutely anything to get as much sex and $$$ as possible and ignore the psychopaths who like him. That's the only legal thing you can do.

Last night I saw some clip of F&F trying to kick out some girl who study's Gender roles at college. At some point she refused to leave till her ride came so she stood by the balcony to avoid Myron. The super chats were going crazy telling this girl to jump off the balcony. The other thing that disturbed me was that everyone on the panel was just laughing and making fun of her. Myron himself was threatening to grab her by the neck and through her out. I've come to the conclusion that at least half of their fan base are potential murderous Incels who genuinely hate, I mean HATE women.

More evidence for psychopaths all the way down but I was trying to find other demographic break downs. I know a bunch about Andrew Tate's fanbase but he's more infamous.

Actually.. Surely this is against YT's terms of service or something? I think they have been banned before though. Oh yeah I'm just behind lol:

Fresh and Fit loses YouTube partnership; superchats removed; possible end of Fresh and Fit

Their channel(s) are still around though afaik.

The thing that makes me more sick to my stomach is how they manage to get women on the show at all. The conduct towards their female guests is miserably poor and hypocritical and its not even subtle, you can WATCH it unfold online.

I don't like enablers with inflated egos. FnF are garbage, you've got to be out of your mind to go to their den. All for what? Being right?

It's a symbiotic relationship at this point. The women get some clout and the psychos get the content and money.

From wikipedia at least one female guest they had on a lot seems to have had a fucked up life:

Allen was born on December 7, 1996, to LaKeithia Lewis and Michael Allen, and was the second daughter of four children. Raised in the south side of Dallas in an area known as Park Row,[5] Allen's early life was dealt with instability; from poverty and her father being in and out of prison. Allen had her first run-in with the law when she was 12 years old.[6] Allen attended Skyline High School and dropped out in the 12th grade.

I imagine it's similar for a lot of them. But in the case of the 'gender studies' student she presumably comes from a very different demographic and I'd guess is just like the hopelessly naive amazon reviewer I quoted who thinks she's going to debate them into submission or something? There's nothing useful you can do in that regard that's legal so I wouldn't bother interacting with them directly.

I found a clip of one woman talking to them and claiming to be a virgin and waiting till marriage she was very softly spoken and seemed a bit anxious but I don't know if that was a mask/act or not. I don't know how women like that would end up on that show. I feel like she's been overprotected or something so doesn't realise what she's dealing with.

I also found a review where some guy said he was 21 and had been watching them for years. Teen years seem bleak in the 2010s.

[Nyctophilia]

Lol because he knows sociosexually restricted men won't compete with him for casual sex so he devotes a strange amount of time to trying to disuade them from having long term relationships how convinient. Well I don't know if he knows that consciously or if he's just an automaton.

What I think is happening - and this is just conjecture - is that as part of their psychopathic reproductive stategy they pretend to be interested in promoting stable relationships and conservative norms but what they actually want to do is put people off having long term relationships so they can have a larger dating pool - after all they transparently continue to have tons of casual sex or at least lie about having tons of casual sex to get $$$. It won't work since most women will choose to remain single or date other women but it kind of fucks things up for insecure men who want heterosexual relationships maybe. I feel like most people following them are probably psychopaths too though. Someone should eventually do some research on that I suppose. Like is it just psychopaths all the way down.

I can't see this working for much longer anywhere where abortion is legal because women are choosing themselves often to have abortions now and there's not much stigma about it among in particular women who have casual sex. There's also widespread contraception, and the guys doing this are themselves pressuring women to have abortions. I think it will work to the extent that women want to try and get money out of a guy, or where policymakers stupidly ban abortion, but in general this strategy will eventually die out genetically or become even more rare because of technology lol.

These guys in particular are also doing stuff like refusing to date black women (at least claiming to,) digging around more they specified this:

Both men have stated that they do not date "ghetto black women and Shaniquas".[34][35] In one instance, Gaines said that it is "just a preference [they] have to not date black women."[36]

This will reduce their dating/sex pool even further and makes it even less likely they'll reproduce because to be blunt they're not really going to be dating or having sex with anyone who is from a significantly higher class unless they're a bit off and also anti-liberal because they're too open about their misogyny etc and if they did they'd use protection/get abortions. They also can't date genuine conservative women of course.

I think most of their dating pool is going to be psychopathic women who want money (who they are trying to avoid,) and women who are also desperate, uneducated, and living in poverty etc but most will jsut get abortions because they know it's not a safe bet. Another thing is a lot of these women have increased rates of bisexuality and are dating women instead now probably in response to this strategy. Historically this probably would have been useful if they did get pregnant because of co-parenting but now they just don't get pregnant because of abortions, contraception etc, and wait to find a better guy to have kids with. Or don't have kids, have kids with female partners and sperm donors etc.

I don't think anyone is really going to miss you guys.

Also:



To insult people for dancing just reveals you're a philistine and at this point 'sodomite' is basically a compliment anyway.

I was doubtful when someone suggested on reddit that that 'Fit' guy was closeted and that was the reason for his misogyny but he seems to have at the very least weird double standards. Dancing with women is gay but cuddling with guys in bed isn't? Alright.

Lol also he addresses when 'fit' said he's going to eat him but kind of missed the craziest thing he said 'I'll make you the sodomite you really are motherfucker' so... You're going to have sex with him? That's also pretty gay dude. In a literal sense.

Not really surprised to hear he has issues with vaginas. I've noticed a pattern regarding sexual hang ups with a bunch of extremist manosphere or manosphere-adj guys online (I mean a varied range of guys who don't all use the same label, but have similar psychological issues. Bronze Age Pervert is tangentially related too.)

Also I fell down a rabbit hole before of reading various reddit posts and found this comment (unrelated to these guys,)

I just said it's a phase for young women (and young men). The world is not kind in the long run to a feminine man. I went through my 'goth' makeup douchebag phase when I was younger. I didn't even think of why I was doing it at the time, but you then look back and realize it was all to get attention from chicks in any way. Desperate actions.

It didn't really work and my friends made fun of me and brought me back. When I butched back up I got plenty of attention from chicks. I live in rural Texas, being a feminine man ain't popular around here. All the hottest chicks were with the athletes. Being a feminine man here would get you more attention from, well, not so hot chicks.

I had a nightmare about you once.

Lol I actually did have a nightmare a few years ago (maybe in 2020? Sometime between 2019-2021 I would say.) About a goth guy who changed his appearence to be more masculine because of other guys influence but in the end it became a lucid dream and so I had control over his wardrobe for a bit which was hot until that part of the dream was interrupted by Kanye West trying to break into my house. Fucking Kanye.

What if I stumbled on this thread before and forgot? (that thread was 3 years old so it's possible.) Trippy.

edit: I looked up the date I had the dream and it was in June 2020 the post was from May 2021 so I didn't know about it before =D I love it when I'm accidentally psychic. But realistically this must have happened to tons and tons of guys because that's how social shaming works and goth aesthetics are popular.

I was at this beach side town and some kind of event (can't remember what now) was going lots of people around, and there was a large Ferris wheel thing. At some point I went into this fish and chip shop and stood around waiting to order. Kind of wish I could remember this part more I think many things happened.

Later (this skips some bits but I'm not great at remembering dreams as mentioned.) I was watching TV (only it was more like being online,) and this guy he'd posted this image of himself with like four photos and saying that he was a virgin at the time all these photos were taken but not the last one.

And I was like 'WHAT THE **** YOU WERE A VIRGIN WHEN THE THIRD PHOTO WAS TAKEN BUT YOU'RE SO HOT' because he was like slim and had long black hair and was basically a hot goth.

So anyway then the guy appears and we end up in my room but then it's not entirely clear if he's into me or not and then I'm also unsure how we can have sex, and then I look at him and he has a beard and I'm like 'oh no' because I want to date the goth guy but now he has a beard. (this is kind of a worrying pattern a while back I had a dream that this singer shaved his hair off and got really upset in the dream like he'd died or something :') it wasn't him in this dream btw the goth guy looked very different. I basically only sexualise myself, women, Asian guys and goths in my dreams or specific people.) Yeah I'm really shallow but I also think it's symbolic in some way, but mostly shallow.

Then a bit later I have some kind of false awakening where I'm explaining this dream.

Only I didn't wake up and then at some point he was back and explaining that nobody liked him before and he met some guy in a park and changed his outlook (maybe he also joined the army but that's kind of vague in my memory.) Then he was successful with women. And then I guess because of the false awakening thing maybe it was semi lucid now it wasn't entirely because I don't think I knew I was dreaming, but I seemed to have more control. So after that I decided to alter the dream and try and convince him to wear a certain outfit that was inspired by a pornographic image I like where there's this goth person surrounded by [redacted] wearing fishnets and stilettos and a bikini (or something I dunno exactly,) and partly another image I had in mind (was some Loki fanart,) like two of them sort of combined, but he got really into the idea and got aroused.

And then I think that dream switched to where I was in the living room or something and he wasn't there and some weird person was running up my garden about to break into my house. So I left the room quickly and my brother said who it was and it was Kanye.

Not all my sexual dreams are based on kinks I have while awake but in this case it was pretty close. And yeah that's the appeal of that guy with the website for me too even though he has so many red flag traits. Not that I'm one to talk but damn does he have to stop talking about wanting to have a daughter and then turn her into his ideal self (which is also based on his ideal woman.)

The former goth also said this in response to this question:

Why are young women choosing to swoon over famous feminine men instead of the thousands of masculine famous men?

Because the famous feminine men are doing something the young women can relate too. (be it shitty music, fashion or whatever) Being a feminine man in the regular world however serves no great function. If it did, you'd see all of us prancing about. The feminine men thing is a phase. When young women come down from the fantasy, they are looking for 'their dad' in a man.

You see I can be incredibly stubborn and will never compromise on this. That's obvious to me as I am now 33.







Her fabulous invention, What strange imagination shown.
Her glorious intentions, a sea of doubt beneath her own.
It said "You're not the first to dream this, little girl.
You know it's never happened once in this world.
It never crossed my mind that one so young could hope to find a power greater then my own."

She never did what they told her to,
And they'll never see her dream come true.

The edge of revelation, believing all the stories told
A final moment taken before this story's end unfolds
It said, "You're not the first to dream this, little girl
You know it's never happened once in this whole wide world
It never crossed my mind that one so young could hope to find a power greater than my own."

Now she flies over clouds in twilight skies.
Nothing to bind her, no one will find her this high.
Far above the rainy weather,
All plans have come together,
And for the first time she feels just fine.

I'm not looking for a dad figure in a man just like I'm not looking for Yahweh in God and so on.

But there's another reason I think, that turned it into a war:

If you want to date somebody that looks like your dad, that's fine for you, but don't put that on all women. I'm in my 20's, and I still prefer men with no body hair, fluffy hair, and pretty faces.

I didn't say 'looks like dad.' You're basically talking about boys, and well, that isn't a life long option for you much less anyone else, as that is such a niche thing. We are also talking about young men that are basically metro, and trying to look a certain way, not genetics. We were talking about famous men young women relate to, because they are essentially a touch feminine (to sell themselves to you) and therefore in their periphery.

I mean, drag queen and transexual guys are probably more popular with women these days than than the hunkiest, best looking studly man you could ever find. And the interest with women isn't a sexual one when it comes to those men, simply just feminine relation. (see Jeffery Starr)

I think the better point is, many women aren't actually interested in men as men are, the way men are to women. This is simply out of women being the approached/selected of the genders. Men can't get enough of female sexuality, where as a lot women are scared of male sexuality. Of course I'm generalizing. Many young women can't wait to be with manly man.

Of course I'm always generalizing because I don't care to have to spend time including niche people's interest into every conversation. The 'feminine' boy interest thing usually ends in the teen years with most young women. Not into their 20s and beyond. Consider yourself a weirdo (not judging, just saying) One thing is for sure, I can't say I'm into super girly young looking (and young period) women, that dress and act young in a sexual manner, without catching heat.

The shame.

I'm honestly not that surprised that F1nn gets hit on by a lot of straight women. There's a significant proportion of straight women, who only tend to be vocal during their yaoi/fujoshi/BL reading teen phase but then to go silent during adulthood for fear of judgment, who've both A: Often wished they themselves had a penis, and B: Are very into the thought of male/male pairings, both romantically and sexually. It's the equivalent of the old trope of guys who are really into watching lesbians, only with more social shame attached (making it harder to openly admit/discuss). From my observations at least, this population actually seems to be really into prettier guys (making F1nn an ideal candidate). I suspect because on the surface a relationship with a prettier, less classically (and perhaps toxically) masculine guy would seem to provide more flexibility for exploration and power sharing. In our society, there's still a social expectation that women will be sexually submissive and men will be sexually dominant, to the point where you risk being shamed for violating these norms (with both dominant women and submissive men facing that risk), and risk being seen as less womanly or manly (as the case may be) as a result, to the point where even many bi women will identify as being dominant only with other women but still submissive with men. It's why, even though a roughly 50/50 split for dominance/submission should be expected for both genders (as there is no biological motivator towards either), we still see the numbers in our society skewed towards far more sexually submissive women and far more sexually dominant men. For a lot of people, fear of the stigma drives them to the more socially acceptable place, and keeps them there. With a guy like F1nn, there's little expectation of having to conform to such social stereotypes. It gives a bottled-up straight woman the chance to more greatly explore shifting power dynamics without fear of judgment, the opportunity to try out something much closer to the male role from one of their fantasies. It's part of why material written by gay men for gay men tends to have far more classically masculine characters, whereas a lot of BL and shounen ai (which is primarily written by women) feature male characters who are both more likely to be bishonen (pretty boys) and more likely to be more open to their feminine sides.

It's different for you though. Women never stop looking feminine even as they age.

That's why I said it's impressive he was 49 in this video I think:



But the cult leader aesthetic was making me uncomfortable so I ended up moving onto 1970s boyfriend/girlfriend:





And younger Steven Wilson with long hair obviously (especially in some comics people made on Tumblr,) but he was always attractive to varying degrees.

Uh I don't find various rationalisations/logical arguments for why I should settle for some masculine guy very compelling. Obviously that is the common sense/popular thing to do it's just not going to happen. I can't rationalise my way into attraction. Also I'm not going to end up with anyone because I live like a hermit now anyway lol.

I mean, drag queen and transexual guys are probably more popular with women these days than than the hunkiest, best looking studly man you could ever find. And the interest with women isn't a sexual one when it comes to those men, simply just feminine relation. (see Jeffery Starr)

Oh that's not a good example. I don't like him as a person but he's had sex with many women and specifically said they prefer him to keep the feminine look when they do. It surprised the guys he was talking to.

Most also assume he is gay but he has casual sex with women but prefers long term relationships with men. There are many women with the same sexuality floating around. Lesbians complain about them a lot.

Yeah he talks about that in this video:



These guys who are like 'they just like them as friends' are so cute hahaha. But I guess that's - in theory - the point of the sexual strategy. Although tbh since a similar sexuality is more common in women it could be something else entirely and I lean towards it being something else entirely. Especially given his class background + liberal lifestyle. Just seems like a form of bisexuality that is generally more common in women where you have casual sex with women somtimes but mostly want relationships with men.

Bisexual women love feminine men. Studies have proven this. Also just anecdotally I've seen it haha

I'm curious about this too. I haven't found much on the topic really but it's something I want people to research more. I found one study where they basically had to exclude all women who weren't exclusively heterosexual (even if they didn't identify as bisexual,) because they noticed they had different facial preferences for femininity in male faces like a wider spectrum of attraction or something which didn't work for their purposes (can't remember the details now but posted about it at some point.)

Redpill guys are so boring though. I ended up looking through some threads on the purple pill debate subreddit:

Red Pillers, the consensus on dominant women and submissive men?

[...]

Basically, I believe that while the Red Pill isn't wrong on what men and women innately want in a relationship, there are outliers. So to Red Pillers, what are your thoughts on both groups? What makes these people what they are? And can a woman go from naturally dominant to submissive, and can a man go from naturally submissive to dominant, or can that not be changed?

They're such a tiny fraction of a statistical anomaly that they're not relevant, the vast majority of men and women are not like this.

They made it clear in the OP that they wanted to discuss outliers and here you are doing this boring song and dance. And half the responses in the thread seemed to be talking about something else (even though it's a sexuality + relationship discussion subreddit,) like women in high powered careers etc. How boring.

can a woman go from naturally dominant to submissive, and can a man go from naturally submissive to dominant, or can that not be changed?

Can a lion go from hunting prey to grazing in the Serengeti? Can a fish go from living in water to frolicking on land?

Some things are biologically wired and cannot be changed.

That's what I'm thinking. It's just in the cases that I'm talking about, they get built differently. And that's okay.

I think that most women actually tend to be dominant in a relationship i.e. she wants it to be gynocentric and her priorities to take precedent by default. What most usually don't want is the responsibility that comes with authority...she wants to "top from the bottom" as it were. She doesn't want the buck to stop with her.

Dominant women are more visible/aggressive on the "I have the [BEEP] I make the rules" thing than most women are, but the avoiding responsibility (specifically, blame) piece often remains.

The sexual tension/excitement comes from wanting a to tame a man that cannot be tamed. Her ego spurs her to ride the emotional roller coaster. Again, different women have different levels of tolerance for this game. A man that manages to pull an uno reverse and dominate her instead is the height of emotional stimulation and causes the (unexpected from her perspective) reversal from her normal dominant attitude to an almost comically submissive one. This is how women can turn into perfect little bangmaids for Chad, but Brad stays jumping through hoops.

Men, on the other hand, seem to be more naturally submissive a lot of the time. They want peace. They are willing to tell her/do whatever she wants to stay on her good side and stop the nagging. They are far more content with less effort in the relationship outside of sex and are generally low maintenance. They don't want drama. "Happy wife, Happy Life" etc.

Dominant men are less tolerant of her bullshit and are more willing to enforce the no drama, peaceful and low effort (for him anyway) style relationships they want.

A sub man can be changed to a dominant if a woman submits and strokes his ego long enough to convince him that he's hot shit.

No it's much less complicated, I just want chad to wear a dress for me and let me peg him :(.

Lol perfect response.

This kind of thing over and over:

A dominant man is just another quality of a man with strength.

Women are attracted to Strength Why? Because women desire Security in all aspects of their life - from predators, resources (money/food/shelter), protection from harm, etc etc.

Women being "Dominant" never works and is repulsive to most masculine men because it usually means ugly wannabe masculine character traits and constant disagreeableness rather than the sweet, feminine, caring women we would rather be with.

It works when we are naturally the dominant/masculine trait partner and our man is the passive/feminine trait partner. Then it is wonderful and complementary.

I've really never seen a naturally dominant woman so it happily and successfully, in all honesty. I find it extremely hard to believe that a woman could be.

You're currently talking to one, who's been in a nearly 15 year relationship with a passive man. It works because we act how we naturally are...I'm the leader, provider, and protector, whereas he's the comforter, cherished one, and supporter.

Ok, well great for you but it's extremely uncommon because it rarely works out long term.

How do you know that relationships between naturally dominant women and naturally passive men rarely work out long-term? We are outliers by ourselves, even more outlier for us to successfully find one another. It's not realistic that any one person would have enough data based on their own observations of couples like us to say it rarely leads to a happy LTR. The truth is there exists no reason for it to not be just as successful as male dominant/female passive relationships.

I'm not sure I've seen a healthy, stable relationship with that dynamic, but I'll concede that such a thing may exist.

The problem with outliers is you can't really form strategies based around them.

Outliers

That is what he said in the OP you boring fucks yes.

That's when I found the thread about feminine guys earlier on the same subreddit and then went to sleep because the discussion was all boring and predictable and also I needed to sleep.

It's not very useful either because they don't differentiate between sexuality and personality. Eg: someone who's sexuality is dominant but their personality is very inhibited or vice versa someone who is very socially dominant but sexually submissive. I suppose if these things are in conflict you're kind of fucked anyway though without even going into attatchment theory.

[Nyctophilia]

Apparently the roofs near here are terracotta and just really dirty and weathered lol. Someone cleaned there's and now it stands out from everything else in this area.

That's not related to what I wanted to talk about though just another thought.

There's this thread I found:

It's by far the greatest music discovery I have done in maybe a decade or two.

Listening to it makes me very emotional. It touches something deep inside.

But yesterday I started to watch his live shows. And I don't know why but I just can't stand the person. He his so exuberang and reeking false modesty. Everytime he speaks or gestures it's as if he wants to celebrate his incredibly unique and magnificent self. And I mean he does create exquisite music but I imagined someone humble.

And I absolutely don't mind him being effeminate. Or should I say his feminine sensitivity. This probably helps him create such sensitive and beautiful music.

But he is so infatuated with himself....

Before anything else I think it's funny that people describe him and his music as androgynous or feminine because I feel like he's the most masculine guy I've been attracted to at all in like a decade lol? Besides the time he was a hot girl of course:



I still think it's hilarious that intiially I didn't realise it was him and was just scrolling through twitter like 'wait a minute who is this hot-oh. I see what you've done.'





Got distracted again trying to find that. God he was so hot during that era.

I completely forgot what I said in my last post about the tumblr comics too. OK yeah well he's the most masculine + sexuality going to sexuality or I wouldn't be interested probably person. There's also the fact that I was attracted to someone who looked like him once and they later came out as non-binary but that's just a coincidence. Plus the person I was attracted to cut their hair short anyway later on. Lol and then Steven did too thinking about it.

What the [BEEP] am I talking about OK I tried:

Uh I don't find various rationalisations/logical arguments for why I should settle for some masculine guy very compelling. Obviously that is the common sense/popular thing to do it's just not going to happen. I can't rationalise my way into attraction. Also I'm not going to end up with anyone because I live like a hermit now anyway lol.

It's not impossible either that I could be attracted to a more masculine guy (it's not actually as dramatic as I made it out to be,) as I've been attracted to a couple of people I feel were more masculine (like the character Rorsharch when I was 20 or something, based on the film and the actor who plays him as well. He's short but otherwise masculine. Also the character is ideologically very different to me and all the other issues lol so that wouldn't work at all in reality either,) but I feel like I'm going to be constantly trying to find some kind of androgyny if I end up with someone masculine unless there's something there. I feel like I start doing this sometimes anyway even when I'm not consciously doing it like when I photoshopped my ex's tyrannid photo pink, or when I suggested one of my ex's wear eyeliner that I was using for a Halloween costume. They weren't even masculine really. (Although he did reject the eyeliner idea lol.) Otherwise there's something very disapointing about that kind of persona (difficult to articulate and describe the boundaries.) I don't know why but that's how it is.

[T]he way I've chosen to make music is what you might call quite unconventional or unusual -- it's certainly not the way that you (sic) supposed to conduct your career as a musician if you want to be successful. So, in that respect, I have been quite rebellious in my own natural way - even the fact of moving from style to style, from GENDER TO GENDER you know, it?s quite unusual for musicians to do. It's not something that people understand very easily -- that one many it wants to do (sic, sic, sic?) a death metal album and the next many (sic) it want to do a pop album or the next many he wants (sic!) to do an R 'n' B record. (emphasis mine)

The words "gender to gender" practically punched me in the face! Where did that come from!? I read the entire interview over and over to see if there was anything else mentioned about Wilson's gender, or any supposed gender transcending. Nothing. Just that phrase. Could it have been a mistake? The sentence enveloping this ominous statement seems to be talking about musical styles. And the rest of his response talks about switching musical genres.

He must have meant genre to genre lol. It's a typo. There's no other context.

Oh, darn. I got excited for a second there. I thought I found a new connection with one of my favorites artists, and a new understanding of his lyrical themes about troubled youth. How could I be teased so?! Gender and genre are OBVIOUSLY very different words. How can someone mix them up?

And most importantly, when is Steven Wilson going to show us his ultimate femme drag collection?!

So what you're saying is. You clickbaited me 14 years after with the title of your blog?

I'm doing it again you see.

Anyway the other thing I can see why someone might feel that way but I feel like part of it is his sense of humour. He's also kind of addressed this I think in the description of one video:

The Insurgentes documentary / road-movie Lasse Hoile made in 2008-9 about the recording of my first solo album has now been remastered and can be viewed here. It's a snapshot of where I was at that time in my life - having recently turned 40, this period was about taking some new creative paths, and both my solo career and work remixing classic albums began around this time. We had a lot of fun doing the film but it was not the happiest time for me in my personal life (which definitely comes across), plus not everyone got what we thought was surreal and funny. So I think it created an impression of me as a rather dour and over-serious individual that for some people is - understandably perhaps - still their overriding impression of me! Still I'm proud of what we did, and I believe it remains quite unique in the pantheon of music documentaries.

I think he does have high standards for himself and others though.

Other than that I haven't finished reading his book yet so I might change my mind lol but I think while he's obviously a bit disapointed by his lack of commercial success (which he talks about sometimes,) he spends a lot of time talking about other's music and stuff as well. So I wouldn't say he's completely self obsessed.

Like he just started talking about one of my favourite albums during a concert I went to once lol:



I also I like that he talks about music he likes a lot. I don't usually look stuff up because I'm kind of slow about doing that these days but I discovered Throbbing Gristle through him talking about them lol. He said they made the darkest music he'd ever listened to so obviously had to check that out. At some point people have clearly picked up on the fact that he likes to do that and now ask him about this a lot lol:



^ I'm only 4 minutes into this video so still need to finish it.

Also I think if you're performing you're going to have to be like that at least a little bit. Otherwise I don't think it would work. But it's difficult to develop a stage persona I think and I'm sure he's more focussed on music creation generally than the image. I'm not put off by his stage performance at all though personally. I think it's kind of endearing how he has these eccentricities like he never wears shoes or socks on stage lol.

Also this:

I haven't met Wilson in more than 15 years but seeing that I was lucky to discover PT, relatively early, December -95 in London.

I went to a lot of PT shows back then and there were many of us fans who talked to the whole band after the shows and I have had many experiences with Wilson as a young fan, Wilson would let me in for sound checks and so on.

And he always were kind, interested in the people he talked to, open for discussions? even active on the first porcupine tree fan forum 😃

I think what we saw live, especially during the Porcupine Tree years. was someone being uncomfortable in that position so he developed his stage persona, especially with his gestures but as a fellow human being, at least for my experience he was extremely down to earth.

This is funny:

You apparently did not grow up in the '70s, going to Jethro Tull concerts.

I certainly did not. I was born in 1989.

You're a year older than my youngest son.

https://youtu.be/WLL31o2iu44?si=Uhj2B1qnZTlW6CwM

I've noticed about that much of an age gap between me and a lot of his fan base at concerts. Damn those Jethro Tull moves are very reminiscent of Steven's, thanks for sharing!

I took my youngest son and oldest stepson to see SW on my birthday a few years back. They spent a lot of the show hanging around by the bar on the balcony in the venue. At one point I went up and joined them, and my youngest said "I thought about coming down and finding you in the crowd, but all I could see was a sea of bald heads and gray goatees, so I didn't bother."

Us old guys are happy to see you "children" (lol) getting into music we like.

I was born in 1991 and I was always one of the youngest people at his shows and also Porcupine Tree when I went. There are other younger people who turn up to his shows but weirdly I noticed they were mostly travelling from somewhere or looked ethnically ambiguous like some South Asian people maybe or I guess it's possible some were Hispanic or something too. Very different demographics to most other concerts I go to so stood out to me. Even though he made most of his music in the 90s and 2000s a lot of his fans are older because of his style of music.

Who cares. I've never understood people's obsessions with other humans words and actions. We all have our own consciousness, living in our own little consciousness bubble, interpreting things in our own way for each and every person. Let him be infatuated with himself. That doesn?t affect my brain enjoying the music that he creates.

It won't affect my appreciation of his music. But I won't be watching live shows. Or maybe I'll get over the disappointment. I think I wanted to admire the person, not just the musician. I tend to agree with a lot of what you said about consciousness.

They are seriously missing out if they don't go to a live show. His music is so good live, sometimes better than on studio recording.

Honestly he and Mikael Akerfeldt are two of my favorite musicians ever but I've never been able to shake the feeling that personally they may be assholes that are a bit difficult to work with behind closed doors. I have no proof for this, it?s just a feeling that I've always had about them.

But I also don't fucking care if that's who they are. They are the only people making music now that I always love and I have found almost nothing else musically that resonates with me nearly on the level of these two.

I think he's talked in interviews about being a bit controlling/uncompromising creatively especially with his solo work and Porcupine Tree are a band and started as his project but then others joined and that process was probably difficult too but I think they had more input than the musicians he works with solo. Kind of like a director.

I'm glad I got to see Drag Ropes live:



Comment on another thread:

Oh yes. I mean remember when he got married, or when he started on Instagram, or even now on Tiktok? Some of these people seem to see Wilson as some weird caricature of a ?tortured artist? that is just embarrassing.

Risking downvotes, I used to follow this subreddit but the amount of "discourse" (the whining, the Porcupine Tree, the weird projecting onto SW) just made it too annoying, and now I just come in every once in a while to see if there are worthwhile news.

I think there are some people who him to remain niche. You kind of get these fans with every musician who isn't very well known they're kind of jealous with regards to the music and image etc. It's silly though because he obviously wants more people to listen to his music.

I know another musician I follow got frustrated with social media/self promotion so left (also the lack of results,) but you kind of have to if you want anyone to find your work.

Also I'm not on tiktok but I like that he's uploading videos about music discussion. I still need to check out the podcast he's done at some point.

I was listening to the song Heart Attack in a Layby recently and maybe it's because I was on my period but it just hit me in a way it hasn't before. It's been a while since I've listened to that song. It's really great musically imo as with most of his work and I really love the outro but it's a really depressing song lyrically and I don't always listen to the lyrics in his music. I do quite a bit because I'm into lyrics in general - not everyone is but I quote lyrics constantly for how I'm feeling about everything so I do notice/enjoy lyrics. But in the case with his music sometimes I'm not paying close attention because the music is also very good but I suddenly 'processed them' I guess and it's kind of a mindfuck.



As much as I like this there are also lots of great live performances.



And then one of the comments on a live performance of this song (not the one I linked,) was very depressing. I notice often depressing anecdotes get upvoted on music videos like everyone's family members have just been murdered or died etc - either that or they're a very masculine construction worker who's listening to girlypop - but in this case it wasn't even upvoted there weren't many comments or views in general:

They said that their dad had a heart attack on a bus during covid and no one noticed because of social distancing and he died.

Also I fell down a weird rabbit hole (sure why not talk about this straight after that lol,) with a thread talking about Steven Wilson's wife and I think he has a very specific type because there's some confusion about whether the photo they posted is the same woman as some old girlfriend he had and in another photo they really do look like the same person to me but in an interview around 2017 he said he'd sacrificed marriage etc for his career and was never going to have a family, and whoever his wife is who he married in 2019 now has kids because he spoke about that (and they're not biologically his.)

It would explain the haircut

He's been with her for like 30 years lmao, shes even thanked on On The Sunday of Life

Guess I never cared much about his personal life. For some reason i thought I had read in an interview that he considered himself a bachelor for life. Glad to know he's got someone.

Ik what interview video you're talking about, the one where the title is "I sacrificed family for music". That video was just a bunch of clickbait garbage

Yeah I saw that video too.

Is this her too?

And what kind of satanic [BEEP] are they into to keep from aging?

Nope iirc that's the gf from late 2000s

That girl's name was Annabelle

It's Terumi

Edit: maybe not??

He just said in an interview that he "recently started a new relationship with a woman with children", I can't really see this being her. Also, she looks younger than 30 years.

If it's true that she's a new flame after a ~30 year on-off relationship ended, then I'm surprised he didn't go for the buzzcut tbh haha

Too soon :(

I'm still grieving Steven's hair over here, lol.

I agree with you. But the main thing that confuses me really hard is that his relationship with Terumi are so messed up through the years. He dated with few girls in the mid '90s - in early 2000, but he always was close (?) with her as well, even called her as a girlfriend when dated the others. And this was going on. For example, he was dating another Israel girl in 2013 (not Annabelle), but lived with Terumi. In any case, it's just my and my gf's researches and I'm so confused about this sphere.

wut

I have no idea who any of these people are lol so could just be friends or an open relationship.

I've always been under the impression he is gay.

That's just the people who ship him with Mikael Akerfeldt. Speaking of that lol:

There's always a lot of stuff on the Internet that talks about your friendship with Steven. Have you ever come across any of it?

You mean like when people make fun of us and stuff and they try to portray us as a gay couple? He's a really good friend of mine but I certainly wouldn?t [BEEP] him.

And the dreams of tumblr fan fiction died...

On par with Kirk/Spock fan fiction.

Not even close lol. Spock/Kirk was huge.

I don't think most are making fun of them, they think it's hot then they try to downplay that sometimes because it's weird to ship real people so make it seem like 'it's a joke.' But there's also a bunch of fanfiction.

Lol as Strange once said:

"This might be controversial. In fact I think this will be controversial. I do think that the Hamlet fandom is classier about it at least on the surface. But the amount of fanfiction which exists. You people can't hide behind your artsy black and white academia edits. I know was this is. The aesthetic might be different but at it's core - tumblr sexymen."



But that word isn't applicable to real people and that's generally frowned upon. Also replace dark academia edits with 'I'm just joking lololol' it's also like 5 people or something I think lol so won't be that much fanfiction.

Actually tbf I've seen more people on tumblr who ship him with Aviv Geffen including fanart and they link to their fanfiction. I was surprised to see it initially actually years ago with Mikael and Steven because Steven's so unknown and none of these people have sizeable female fandoms. That was when I realised Tumblr has it's own version of rule 34 (not really though I've never managed to find Isha/Slaanesh fanfiction.)

Personally I didn't do that with him and other people though and mostly tried to avoid doing that and also reading fanfiction with real people over the years as well after my phase when I was 13 or so. Failed a couple of times with fanfiction with Radiohead and some kpop band in my early 20s. And IAMX once in my 20s (it helps that I didn't ship him or really any of these people after about 13 with anyone but still got curious,) also failed again recently not with Steven Wilson with Rush they mentioned the tags glasses and [BEEP] you. Basically I'm like an alcoholic lol. I have succesfully never read Steven Wilson fanfiction although I have seen people's fanart and one of them was hot (it didn't have shipping but was feminisation themed so I still felt guilty,) but it's hard to avoid that if you're on tumblr.

I was gonna say, there's no possible way that Wilson was in a relationship during the writing of Incident disc 2 lol

He was, just with another girl called Annabelle. She's thanked in FOABP and TI

His love life may be the deepest rabbit hole there ever was

Lol right?

Yeah I never really paid attention/noticed anything about his life (besides the gay shipping,) until he posted instagram photos of his wedding in 2019 I think and some fan videos I stumbled on last year ended up including that and she's in one of his YouTube videos as well I think that I didn't watch. I didn't notice at the time any of this was happening either I think I noticed like last year lol.